lefulefu:
why? because the kids are not that of the man right?
if the wife is honest and no deceit in her part she will pass the visa

I did not write anything about kids and paternity. Just that not everyone that applies for a visa gets it.

Immigration, even family based, is a privilege and not a right.

Michelle55:
If she can't wait, let her buy vibrator na. But it ain't an easy feat being without your spouse.

Then again, being faithful isn't something we do for our spouse like most people think, it's an individual decision to stay sane and worthy and not to turn to a public rest room where anyone can come in and deposit their spunks.

Dear men abroad about wifing our ladies in Nigeria, make una consider say body no be firewood too, make una try dey reach house at least every 6months or 1yr edakun.

As for me, I don't know if I'll be able to cope without seeing my spouse (not on the ground of sex) but I like seeing my partner every day, listen to his tales on how is day went, make him smile it off and lastly gum body

When you place value on yourself, you go wait as a wife knowing he isn't playing there but rather trying to make life easier for you and the kids.

Hmm, NL has some beautiful (at heart) ladies. Impressive

There's nothing wrong in a man staying overseas while his wife, either young or old, staying in Nigeria.
Any man who sleeps with another man's wife should definitely expect Wrath of God.
I strongly advise all women whose husbands live abroad to remain steadfast in prayer and stay away from all forms of temptations to fornicate. It's highly spritually rewarding to keep your legs closed while your husband is over there fending for economical survival of you and your children.
Moreso, any woman who cannot control her sexual urge in her husband's absence should LEGALLY DIVORCE the "away-husband", that would be better.

And for those of you giving satanic advise, May God forgive you.

If not for my personal principle, I would have been giving it steady to some of my sex starved neighbours in same dilemma.

MrBrownJay1 in as much as your points are such bitter pills to swallow, we all can't deny the fact that you're saying the truth.

Marriage isn't meant to be experienced at a distance.

There is no excuse whatsoever to have an extended long distance Marraige.

I know of one here that sleeps with anything in skirts yet boasts that his Nigerian wife in Canada wife is holy and can't do anything.

What if she eventually cheats on him. There are several of them in the banking and oil & gas sector. These people are very well to do so I don't see the reason behind seeing your family once in a year.

What about the emotional needs of your wife? The psychological needs of your kids?

Why have we placed so much value on money about everything else? Is this really life??

Mrscarter:


It all depends on Ur state of mind. How U think n see things.
It can be lonely without your partner's cuddles n kisses n attention n time together. But sex itself well konji can be eased yourself n it's not the same but gets U past the urge

Be realistic , Even the holy book says Husband and wife should not leave each other , they will be tempted. U think u are wiser than God ?

eejo:
I left my Wife in Nigeria early this year for overseas after getting the job of my dream. My Organization is ready to move my family anytime am ready. People are leaving Nigeria because of the Economic situation and the way APC is managing the country. Don't blame the Men but the country.

I hope they dont give ur family visa
I remember when u were insulting Jonathan and hailing buhari

Mrscarter:


Lol not really.
I'm abstinent for a fair while now by choice n I'm happy n healthy n not frustrated in anyway.
N I know once the wait is over it'll be the more sweeter for him and i
Procreation aswell as pleasure can be done at any given time U choose its not a must that U constantly have to give into.
But everyone's different.
Some ppl have a stronger will than others I guess
So

Abstinence before Marriage and after marriage are not the same ... Dont compare , Before marriage, most who abstained havent tasted how if feels like, so it was easy. After Marriage , your body now craves for it.

emkz:
A woman who plays around does not need you to go abroad before she engages her passion. There are women, leave them for 5 years, the way you left them is the way you'd meet them. There are women, go to the grocery, they don dey moan on top man before you start car.

Are you saying if I get a job that requires me to spend six months without my wife because she's rounding up a programme, I should reject it because I don't want my wife to cheat? So I should be monitoring her every move because I don't want her to cheat? Look, if she wan cheat, accept that there is nothing you can do about it.

One dog I was in a relationship with, having cheated, told me she had promised the pastor she was sleeping with to give him a hand job whilst pregnant with my child. I didn't travel anywhere and she cheated.

Look, if you have any fear that your partner would cheat or is cheating, that is the singular reason you shouldn't marry them. Face the heartache now by breaking up now than face the pain of divorce and the spiral effects of spousal infidelity, which may last a lifetime.

PS: Marry a disciplined man or woman who respects you and what you share. Who fears God and values family. She or He won't cheat. Love is not enough to carry a marriage. And many who cheat manifest poor upbringing of lying, stealing, and cheating in small things. Most men and women I have seen or heard cheat, lie or steal, they learnt from their parents.

uncle, If it was your wife that relocated abroad for years, Would you find it easy? Try to put yourself in this womens shoes.

ednut1:
my uncle went to the uk in 1987. His wife joined him in 1999 after he divorced his arrangee wife. He came home every 3 years and hit the jackpot 3 times. Today all the kids are doing well abroad. He is enjoying his retirement there too. Money is very important in this life. No point staying in 9ja suffering with ur wife. She may still cheat on you.

Very similar to my uncle s case. But his own was USA

Please note that the wives of sailors, some soldiers, those working in coal, gold, diamond, uranium and other mines, are left at home.

Even under your nose, a wife can turn your house into beer parlor while you are at work.

When you are gone for weeks or months and each time you come home, your wife annoys you enough to start a fight, don't wait for neighbors to tell you.

But oga calm down oh .

No be by “ everyday video call oh”

It can even happen 2 mins after you drop the call. Just calm down and pray!

Always discuss and encourage your wife. Cos it’s not easy. You just left for one year and you d swear put lol.

Arcbox:

Some of you are damed fucking shit with evil mind and that’s how you can never make progress in life.
I am gonna give you an insight into different scenarios you know nothing about.
My family is in Nigeria and I am outside presently. I came for a PhD program on scholarship and just spend one year here. You are allowed to come over with your family. More over, you need to go and see how things look like. My intention was that my family will join me in six month later which is around faburary/March this year. Event turn out that coronavirus strike and every air space is shutdown. My intention was to come and see my family in July as summer break start but Nigeria air space is shut. Now that’s a different ground. Do you know that my little daughter who just turn 3 years and was schooling in Nigeria, her school fees here is over 10million naira per annum?. My wife is living close with the mother and father. I know she miss me but she can never be close to anyone. I trust her and we are on video call every day. Any woman that believe you and your dreams will support you not all about sex. In the western world here, people huzzle and not thinking of romance and sex as you in Nigeria is always engrossed with. I will see my family in November. When you are coming to social media and talking trash because you manage to buy mtn data, you watch what you say because everybody are different.

But if the man is an idoma man , he can even cheat with anything that crawls....right?

Asquare84:
If the woman is an idoma woman, she dear not cheat on her spouse. If she tried it the god (alekwu) will catch up with her

She dey try market her package ni o. Dont fall for it. Marry her and travel you will be shocked.

rawfact:


Hmm, NL has some beautiful (at heart) ladies. Impressive

Nigerian men want to place their wives last but expect their wives to remain a slave for them and take care of them even in old age. Thank God women are wisening up.

lereinter:


My struggle abroad is for my children first, my family second

Except if my wife is the one that link me abroad

My brother you planted her around ur parents and do video calls with her everyday..lol..

You must be a learner ...lol ur type might even father a child for another man sef...

Uae01Dirham:
But oga calm down oh .

No be by “ everyday video call oh”

It can even happen 2 mins after you drop the call. Just calm down and pray!

Always discuss and encourage your wife. Cos it’s not easy. You just left for one year and you d swear put lol.

I don't like hasty generalisations. I have never passed through a hoeing phase. I know so many ladies who haven't and will never as well.

Stop generalising what you know nothing about.

Chino4NAUTH:

You passed through a normal hoeing phase most ladies pass through .. This one is just an afterthought which those currently hoeing now will also regret.. You enjoyed the fun and night stands while it lasted.. You only needed to settle down and now found out it wasn't needed having one night stand with random dudes when u can have a man all alone to yourself
Good you've found what suits u now

lefulefu:
according to him the woman is always sad when she sees him with other girls and she always tries to get close to him.when a woman acts like that its obvious what she wants.she does not need to tell u she wants to fuk .IF op tries his move she will give in sharp sharp

what i notice in your post is, You speak from a realistic point of view But many here are speaking from am how it should be point of view, they refuse to face reality

You're also a wayward person who wasn't raised right if you think it's okay for men to stick their penis into anything that crawls providing the "thing" isn't married.

foolbuster:


You were brought up right and you will raise real men.

Don't mind all these dogs that call themselves men. No standards, No morals, No discipline. The only thing they know is stick their penis into anything female.

So with the abundance of fine young women scattered everywhere, it is somebody's wife with 2 kids that they'll be lusting over
Tragic thing is they see nothing wrong in it.

bigseank:
These things are really happening, many of these women are struggling o.

Real life experience, a few years back a neighbor husband left her and the kid to spain. this lady was tall and beautiful, she just turned 30. Guys actually used to eye her and approach, but she never gave them a listening ear. The man comes in onces in 2yrs

From hi's, to small talks, to how was your day, to small small you are so funny body touch, to bringing over dinner, to gifts the husby sent, naso e start o.

she hated anytime i had female company, changing her demeanor. she even told her sister who came to spend one of their ASUU strike, straight to keep off or she would send her away.

The day i knew water pass garri was when she came knocking at 1AM, as i opened, she ducked under me straight to the room. met her on my bed, but i kept to myself and rejected her advances that night. o lord did she try.

She hated me for a while, but later came around sha but this time she voiced out.

One day while watching a movie she started getting all touchy as usual and voiced out she needed the D. said if it was pregnancy i was scared of she's a big girl, and she was sure her husband was with someone there. That was when we really now talked and i told her she is another mans property, i cant do it no matter how tempted i am, and yes man was real tempted.

But its all about the mindset and who you are. Put yourself in the man shoes, if you traveled out to hustle and another man was servicing one of the reasons you are hustling.

I have always lived by the golden rule

I admire the bolded. Golden rule is key ... Nice one bro

Reply is for ARCBOX;

My brother you planted her around ur parents and do video calls with her everyday..lol..the day u find out na one of ur family members dey service her or driver or lesson teacher? What will u do sir?

You must be a learner ...lol ur type might even father a child for another man sef...

Mrscarter:


Going without sex isn't that hard.
I don't see how ppl can't do it.
It's no big deal. It depends on your priorities in life and how important your wife/husband is to you and how much you love them

Exactly. I've been without sex for 7 good years until I started dating again this year.

Some women are strong....they have enough to cope with n seeing someone else is out of the table for them.

Pls send me the mama twins number

Parisian:
I don't like hasty generalisations. I have never passed through a hoeing phase. I know so many ladies who haven't and will never as well.

Stop generalising what you know nothing about.

Haba! What is hoeing phase mana!

Mrscarter:


Ikr. U can control any desire weather it be sex or any other thing.
It takes willpower and really I dnt even need that. It's been easy for me.
I started off because I was tired of unmeaningful sex/relationships n wanted to wait until I found the right person n not just any person who I thought was right.
Eventually I met someone far away n feel he's worth waiting for.
Besides no one else has interested me in a long time.
I get lonely sure n I get urges sometimes but isn't like I must run out n just screw somebody. I wanted to be a better person than before n make my body worth more than just sex if U know wat I mean.
N it will be all the more sweeter for myself and the guy when the time finally comes for us to have sex.
Yeah as much as I like sex it's not something I can't do without for as long as it takes.
More women and men should respect their bodies more n not just share it with anyone or with all different ppl all the time.
Some ppl dnt care bout their reputation or sexual health. Ten/thirty mins of pleasure just to go bk home or whatever n know you've just cheated on the one U love or that you've just screwed Ur boss/neighbour or a random person n like someone who's cheap n easy. Isn't worth it.
I've had one night stands years ago just to screw n I'm not proud of it. Wat did achieve me? But being proud of Ur body not being used by ppl who only wanna screw U n use U or knowing U have the strongest loyalty to Ur absent partner and knowing Ur not easy. Or that Ur sexual health is perfect or that U have no reputation as easy or high body count that's all worth much more than a random screw just cos U had urges

Just say the Puna is getting wider... Hence the needed reason to abstain!

If you are planning to move abroad legally and you are married - Your best plan is to leave with your family from Day 1!
Leaving your family behind either the husband or wife is not just worth it.
I have experienced this and I know what I am talking about.

God help you if the time difference is huge.

If that's your plan reconsider and look for that option that allows you to move abroad with your wife.

lereinter:


My struggle abroad is for my children first, my family second

Except if my wife is the one that link me abroad

Guy, this your statement no good oh!

MrBrownJay1:


Lol, if I meet the babe for road and she invites me for some "fun time", would it be written on her forehead that she is married? Or better yet, as the dude is about to mount her, do you think he will ask:" are you married, because if you are I no wan do again?!"



That's the African men misplaced ego's double standard hypocrisy... A man can fukc around all he wants (even while living with wifey) but if wifey dares to look at another man (let alone fukc him), that's an abomination. Lol!

Africa tradition that will soon be history.
it is how God views this matter
Hebrews 13:4, NIV: "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immorals.

While everyone is talking about the disadvantage of long distance relationships.

My own is why are Nigerian men abroad still coming to Nigeria to marry.

Who still does this nonsense.

There are some certain things that need to be stopped.

Another one is men that pay for women school fees in the hope of marriage after she graduates.

It always backfires.

I will rather marry a white woman or even another African woman abroad than coming back home to marry all this hungry entitled girls we have in this country.

Goto Texas and other American states and see the way they are killing them because of how selfish and wicked they are once they come over.

virginprincess:
Well i have nothing to say to you, because the op has giving you the best reply himself, nigeria men & their stupid mentality.

funnily enough, he's a " gender impostor " he's not a man!

Mrscarter:


Ikr. U can control any desire weather it be sex or any other thing.
It takes willpower and really I dnt even need that. It's been easy for me.
I started off because I was tired of unmeaningful sex/relationships n wanted to wait until I found the right person n not just any person who I thought was right.
Eventually I met someone far away n feel he's worth waiting for.
Besides no one else has interested me in a long time.
I get lonely sure n I get urges sometimes but isn't like I must run out n just screw somebody. I wanted to be a better person than before n make my body worth more than just sex if U know wat I mean.
N it will be all the more sweeter for myself and the guy when the time finally comes for us to have sex.
Yeah as much as I like sex it's not something I can't do without for as long as it takes.
More women and men should respect their bodies more n not just share it with anyone or with all different ppl all the time.
Some ppl dnt care bout their reputation or sexual health. Ten/thirty mins of pleasure just to go bk home or whatever n know you've just cheated on the one U love or that you've just screwed Ur boss/neighbour or a random person n like someone who's cheap n easy. Isn't worth it.
I've had one night stands years ago just to screw n I'm not proud of it. Wat did achieve me? But being proud of Ur body not being used by ppl who only wanna screw U n use U or knowing U have the strongest loyalty to Ur absent partner and knowing Ur not easy. Or that Ur sexual health is perfect or that U have no reputation as easy or high body count that's all worth much more than a random screw just cos U had urges

When you see a woman talk like this you will be shocked to know that she has over thousands of vibrators of different kind in her room... This kind of people are d worst to go into relationship with... They come here to look like a saint but I bet you they are not...