₦airaland Forum

Gayatri:
Hm, no vex Sir... Im even disappointed in me more...

I'm no Sir, I'm a woman like you, and I'm telling you to walk away from that guy and don't look back.

Gayatri:
He is not coming out now because he believes according to his discussion with the girl that the girl is over her ex and she is now serious with him... So he says they are working things out... But my existence in his life is important to him...

walk away now, he has no plan for you in his life, once you give him sex thinking it would help change his mind just know you would be done for, why he isn't letting you go is because that's what he wants, after all the hard work he has put in to get you.

Truth is he has no hold or say on you, just walk away, dont pick his calls, answer his messages for sometime

addictiv:
If you love him as you claim, let him go. End all connections with him. Showing him more love will only fuel him to continue with his current babe and keep u as a side piece. Don't ask him to choose between you and her, just end it. If he wants you enough he will have no option than to end things with her. But as it is now he can't make a decision which is not fair to her, you and him so make the decision for both of you by removing urself from his life. Love is more than a feeling, it's a choice.

Oky Sir,, i will... May Jehovah give me the strength... I will.. I will... I know I can and I will... I will face my fear..

osato45:
walk away now, he has no plan for you in his life, once you give him sex thinking it would help change his mind just know you would be done for, why he isn't letting you go is because that's what he wants, after all the hard work he has put in to get you.

Truth is he has no hold or say on you, just walk away, dont pick his calls, answer his messages for sometime

If im leaving him, i do not want to even answer anything from him because it will not make him see my importance more. And my feelings will be growing more and more.. I can not keep him as my friend.. Im praying to harden my heart and leave him totally..
And he has already laid me last month when i visited although twas fustrating for him at first.. I do not wish to hide anything here.. And he says he regrets doing so since its kind of affecting me too and he still wants me around... That i help him grow... Im telling you this part because even after it, he isnt letting me walk.. He is not... And he keep apologising too

Gayatri:
I do not know how to start this but i will write as it comes... I was in a 2 year relationship that ended in march this year.. I was so commited in it like naturally when im dating, i DO NOT notice other guys and i DO NOT ask my boyfriend for financial assistance because i feel im not his responsibility,, what i do appreciate mostly were little things like, chatting, kindness, hugs, opening and closing of doors for me,, just little things, coz i adore them so much.. But anyway it ended.. And i vowed never to date again come what may.. During the break up process, all my friends (guys, hardly have a girlfriend) were there to help me pull through.. Calls and texts constantly because, according to them, they knew my type, thus the help.. Funny enough, i never got attracted to any of them (even the ones that initially asked me out when my friendship with them was fresh) and im not the sex sex type to just fall for any to satisfy my desire.. Though i got advice from neighbours to find someone else than staying alone, i said no especially as i am a loner but a happy loner.. I keep myself busy with work or any stuff that makes me happy.

Fine, two months later (june), some guy reached out to me even as he knew he's got a girlfriend, whixh according to him later, they were in an open relationship.. He stays in oshogbo, his girl stays in kaduna while im in sagamu..Before then, he reached out online by first stalking me on facebook (even though we did same online business), after a while he got talking with me.. At first, i was harsh, very harsh to him but he never minded.. At a point i stopped talking to him.. A month later he reached out again, asking if we were still friends.. I was like yeah, not nice to him at all but he was patient with me..

From mid-july we started talking well as friends, he was very open as i was to him. We flowed well that things were happening to us coincidentally.. Whenever he yawns, i do at my place, if im having a scratch, he does too.. There was just plenty of this connection that we never got tired of each other.. In the procesa of our been honest, he told me about his girl and how she was still keeping her ex and all whatnots... I didnt feel any iota of jealousy because i had not feelings for him yet.. I asked to talk things through with his girl and he says well if she gave the chance.. So laters, by august, september,october, feelings grew.. He got so fond of me... According to him, he has not seen my type before.. Fine! During my birthday, he wanted to do something for me, i said no, then two weeks to his birthday in nov, he asked that i visit him at their family house, that i did..

What struck me most was how the elder brother (married) took care of me... I was not allowed to do nothing.. The brother even cooked for me.. God, it made me fall more for the family.. The kind gestures i have never experienced in my life.. There are kindnesses but there is kindness, the real one.. I felt it.. Every thing that i want in a man, those little things, this guy has them all.. According to him, it baffles him that with the little he shows me, i do not take for granted even before he told me he's having a girl..

When i returned home, we continued our normal talks and he then said, that his girlfriend would be visiting during his birthday.. At that point i went silent.. (Meanwhile he met his girl this year but before me, also during her break up).. He was unhappy that i displayed this little jealousy.. So he says he has not broken up with his girl to start a new relationship and he is hurting that he is hurting me.. He's got feelings for me but he loves his girl.. So i said i was going walk, even though i never meant it, twas hard to even say that but i had to and he says no... That he's become so attached to me even his family thinks he's dating me.. That he controls his feelings for me, could i do same and i said no.. I could not be friends with him when i know that feelings are involved.. Finally, we came to terms to just flow with things since he was not engaged or married to her.. Even so, this guy just lost his job and he says unlike his girl, im the one pushing him to have something doing, he says i help him alot but i wouldnt know.. So we continued to let the whole feelings to flow until last week, when with my help, he was called for an interview in lagos..

As usual we talked and i wished him well.. I always pray for him.. In lagos, we talked well until the third day, our communication changed and before it did, my heart was literally aching, so i knew something was wrong.. I called to know why but he was telling me that he'd let me in when he got back to oshogbo, which he did.. He said his girlfriend who was having something to do with her ex, called him and wanted to settle things with him.. But the truth is, because this lady already had his facebook password when they were together in kadauna, she 3 days before her birthday on the 8th of this month wanted to know why her boyfriend was no longer perturbed over her behaviour, so she saw my chats with the guy and decided to do something,,, this now pushed to talk things out with the bf and apologise to him.. Then she asked him if anything was going on between is and he said no.. That we just friends,close friends.. He lied to her but opens up to me.. He says he doesnt want the girl to ask him to cut me off totally.. So the whole thing got him confused.. He says he's never double dated and he isnt happy that he's hurting me and im taking it... I asked him again if i should walk and he says no.. He does not want to lose me and i do not want to lose him either but i want to prove my love for him so that he one day sees that the girl, probably loves him but she's got no integrity.. And i purely love him.. But because i respect his relationship, i CAN NOT TELL HIM TO BREAK UP WITH HER but wanting him to see things himself but the question is for how long.. He says they are working things out now but he doesnt want to lose me esp as a friend... Difficult.. Out of God knows what, we agreed to let things flow since i will respect his relationship, like whenever his girl is around, i should make him believe that i will be fine.. Now, he isnt happy because he said if he hadnt met the gf, he'd have gone ahead to date me.. For me, i cannot sleep, ive been typing this since God knows when and this is 3:36am.. Since he is confused now, please people, friends, family, can i use love to make him see the difference between his girl and me.. He loves his girl, he is controlling his feelings for me and afraid to let it grow because he knows we'd bond, while my feelings toward him is real.. Money has not been involved in this.. We are 6months now.. I believe in true love and that it does not come easy.. Talk to me Y'll because i have no parents to talk to,, i would have talked to my mum now but she isnt here... I want to win with true love.. I turned 27 this past november and he turned 30 same november.. Thank You and God bless..

U shouldn't have got involved with a guy with a gf. Especially if he planned on staying with her. It's just giving yourself heartache.
If he can't leave his gf what then do you want? Surely not to be a sidechick

Mrscarter:
U shouldn't have got involved with a guy with a gf. Especially if he planned on staying with her. It's just giving yourself heartache.
If he can't leave his gf what then do you want? Surely not to be a sidechick

Hm,, oh God...

Gayatri:
Hm,, oh God...

Exactly. He needs to choose.
Loving a guy who's with another girl he won't leave for you.
Can't U see the heartache ahead for you?
I know it's hard when U love someone but just imagine U love him now n if U stay in his life how much those feelings will grow with time and if he doesn't end up leaving her for you.... imagine how much hurt that will cause you.
If U want him bad enuff I suggest U make him fall for you, be everything's he wants in a woman, then tell him to choose because you're just going to end up hurt otherwise you need cut him out of your life if U can't deal with the hurt that will come.

Gayatri:
Hm,, oh God...

Goodluck

Gayatri:
I do not know how to start this but i will write as it comes... I was in a 2 year relationship that ended in march this year.. I was so commited in it like naturally when im dating, i DO NOT notice other guys and i DO NOT ask my boyfriend for financial assistance because i feel im not his responsibility,, what i do appreciate mostly were little things like, chatting, kindness, hugs, opening and closing of doors for me,, just little things, coz i adore them so much.. But anyway it ended.. And i vowed never to date again come what may.. During the break up process, all my friends (guys, hardly have a girlfriend) were there to help me pull through.. Calls and texts constantly because, according to them, they knew my type, thus the help.. Funny enough, i never got attracted to any of them (even the ones that initially asked me out when my friendship with them was fresh) and im not the sex sex type to just fall for any to satisfy my desire.. Though i got advice from neighbours to find someone else than staying alone, i said no especially as i am a loner but a happy loner.. I keep myself busy with work or any stuff that makes me happy.

Fine, two months later (june), some guy reached out to me even as he knew he's got a girlfriend, whixh according to him later, they were in an open relationship.. He stays in oshogbo, his girl stays in kaduna while im in sagamu..Before then, he reached out online by first stalking me on facebook (even though we did same online business), after a while he got talking with me.. At first, i was harsh, very harsh to him but he never minded.. At a point i stopped talking to him.. A month later he reached out again, asking if we were still friends.. I was like yeah, not nice to him at all but he was patient with me..

From mid-july we started talking well as friends, he was very open as i was to him. We flowed well that things were happening to us coincidentally.. Whenever he yawns, i do at my place, if im having a scratch, he does too.. There was just plenty of this connection that we never got tired of each other.. In the procesa of our been honest, he told me about his girl and how she was still keeping her ex and all whatnots... I didnt feel any iota of jealousy because i had not feelings for him yet.. I asked to talk things through with his girl and he says well if she gave the chance.. So laters, by august, september,october, feelings grew.. He got so fond of me... According to him, he has not seen my type before.. Fine! During my birthday, he wanted to do something for me, i said no, then two weeks to his birthday in nov, he asked that i visit him at their family house, that i did..

What struck me most was how the elder brother (married) took care of me... I was not allowed to do nothing.. The brother even cooked for me.. God, it made me fall more for the family.. The kind gestures i have never experienced in my life.. There are kindnesses but there is kindness, the real one.. I felt it.. Every thing that i want in a man, those little things, this guy has them all.. According to him, it baffles him that with the little he shows me, i do not take for granted even before he told me he's having a girl..

When i returned home, we continued our normal talks and he then said, that his girlfriend would be visiting during his birthday.. At that point i went silent.. (Meanwhile he met his girl this year but before me, also during her break up).. He was unhappy that i displayed this little jealousy.. So he says he has not broken up with his girl to start a new relationship and he is hurting that he is hurting me.. He's got feelings for me but he loves his girl.. So i said i was going walk, even though i never meant it, twas hard to even say that but i had to and he says no... That he's become so attached to me even his family thinks he's dating me.. That he controls his feelings for me, could i do same and i said no.. I could not be friends with him when i know that feelings are involved.. Finally, we came to terms to just flow with things since he was not engaged or married to her.. Even so, this guy just lost his job and he says unlike his girl, im the one pushing him to have something doing, he says i help him alot but i wouldnt know.. So we continued to let the whole feelings to flow until last week, when with my help, he was called for an interview in lagos..

As usual we talked and i wished him well.. I always pray for him.. In lagos, we talked well until the third day, our communication changed and before it did, my heart was literally aching, so i knew something was wrong.. I called to know why but he was telling me that he'd let me in when he got back to oshogbo, which he did.. He said his girlfriend who was having something to do with her ex, called him and wanted to settle things with him.. But the truth is, because this lady already had his facebook password when they were together in kadauna, she 3 days before her birthday on the 8th of this month wanted to know why her boyfriend was no longer perturbed over her behaviour, so she saw my chats with the guy and decided to do something,,, this now pushed to talk things out with the bf and apologise to him.. Then she asked him if anything was going on between is and he said no.. That we just friends,close friends.. He lied to her but opens up to me.. He says he doesnt want the girl to ask him to cut me off totally.. So the whole thing got him confused.. He says he's never double dated and he isnt happy that he's hurting me and im taking it... I asked him again if i should walk and he says no.. He does not want to lose me and i do not want to lose him either but i want to prove my love for him so that he one day sees that the girl, probably loves him but she's got no integrity.. And i purely love him.. But because i respect his relationship, i CAN NOT TELL HIM TO BREAK UP WITH HER but wanting him to see things himself but the question is for how long.. He says they are working things out now but he doesnt want to lose me esp as a friend... Difficult.. Out of God knows what, we agreed to let things flow since i will respect his relationship, like whenever his girl is around, i should make him believe that i will be fine.. Now, he isnt happy because he said if he hadnt met the gf, he'd have gone ahead to date me.. For me, i cannot sleep, ive been typing this since God knows when and this is 3:36am.. Since he is confused now, please people, friends, family, can i use love to make him see the difference between his girl and me.. He loves his girl, he is controlling his feelings for me and afraid to let it grow because he knows we'd bond, while my feelings toward him is real.. Money has not been involved in this.. We are 6months now.. I believe in true love and that it does not come easy.. Talk to me Y'll because i have no parents to talk to,, i would have talked to my mum now but she isnt here... I want to win with true love.. I turned 27 this past november and he turned 30 same november.. Thank You and God bless..

Side chick, go and look for your own man. He's not leaving his gf to be with you

Mrscarter:
Goodluck

God bless You, Ma...

femi4:
Side chick, go and look for your own man. He's not leaving his gf to be with you

Thank You Sir... But please do not act like i threw me on him... Many times i pushed him away, stopped talking to him and after a month he still came back... He stalked me even before he became my friend... You free to be harsh, i deserve it and ima do it.. I do not even stay in same city he does..

Gayatri:
I do not know how to start this but i will write as it comes... I was in a 2 year relationship that ended in march this year.. I was so commited in it like naturally when im dating, i DO NOT notice other guys and i DO NOT ask my boyfriend for financial assistance because i feel im not his responsibility,, what i do appreciate mostly were little things like, chatting, kindness, hugs, opening and closing of doors for me,, just little things, coz i adore them so much.. But anyway it ended.. And i vowed never to date again come what may.. During the break up process, all my friends (guys, hardly have a girlfriend) were there to help me pull through.. Calls and texts constantly because, according to them, they knew my type, thus the help.. Funny enough, i never got attracted to any of them (even the ones that initially asked me out when my friendship with them was fresh) and im not the sex sex type to just fall for any to satisfy my desire.. Though i got advice from neighbours to find someone else than staying alone, i said no especially as i am a loner but a happy loner.. I keep myself busy with work or any stuff that makes me happy.

Fine, two months later (june), some guy reached out to me even as he knew he's got a girlfriend, whixh according to him later, they were in an open relationship.. He stays in oshogbo, his girl stays in kaduna while im in sagamu..Before then, he reached out online by first stalking me on facebook (even though we did same online business), after a while he got talking with me.. At first, i was harsh, very harsh to him but he never minded.. At a point i stopped talking to him.. A month later he reached out again, asking if we were still friends.. I was like yeah, not nice to him at all but he was patient with me..

From mid-july we started talking well as friends, he was very open as i was to him. We flowed well that things were happening to us coincidentally.. Whenever he yawns, i do at my place, if im having a scratch, he does too.. There was just plenty of this connection that we never got tired of each other.. In the procesa of our been honest, he told me about his girl and how she was still keeping her ex and all whatnots... I didnt feel any iota of jealousy because i had not feelings for him yet.. I asked to talk things through with his girl and he says well if she gave the chance.. So laters, by august, september,october, feelings grew.. He got so fond of me... According to him, he has not seen my type before.. Fine! During my birthday, he wanted to do something for me, i said no, then two weeks to his birthday in nov, he asked that i visit him at their family house, that i did..

What struck me most was how the elder brother (married) took care of me... I was not allowed to do nothing.. The brother even cooked for me.. God, it made me fall more for the family.. The kind gestures i have never experienced in my life.. There are kindnesses but there is kindness, the real one.. I felt it.. Every thing that i want in a man, those little things, this guy has them all.. According to him, it baffles him that with the little he shows me, i do not take for granted even before he told me he's having a girl..

When i returned home, we continued our normal talks and he then said, that his girlfriend would be visiting during his birthday.. At that point i went silent.. (Meanwhile he met his girl this year but before me, also during her break up).. He was unhappy that i displayed this little jealousy.. So he says he has not broken up with his girl to start a new relationship and he is hurting that he is hurting me.. He's got feelings for me but he loves his girl.. So i said i was going walk, even though i never meant it, twas hard to even say that but i had to and he says no... That he's become so attached to me even his family thinks he's dating me.. That he controls his feelings for me, could i do same and i said no.. I could not be friends with him when i know that feelings are involved.. Finally, we came to terms to just flow with things since he was not engaged or married to her.. Even so, this guy just lost his job and he says unlike his girl, im the one pushing him to have something doing, he says i help him alot but i wouldnt know.. So we continued to let the whole feelings to flow until last week, when with my help, he was called for an interview in lagos..

As usual we talked and i wished him well.. I always pray for him.. In lagos, we talked well until the third day, our communication changed and before it did, my heart was literally aching, so i knew something was wrong.. I called to know why but he was telling me that he'd let me in when he got back to oshogbo, which he did.. He said his girlfriend who was having something to do with her ex, called him and wanted to settle things with him.. But the truth is, because this lady already had his facebook password when they were together in kadauna, she 3 days before her birthday on the 8th of this month wanted to know why her boyfriend was no longer perturbed over her behaviour, so she saw my chats with the guy and decided to do something,,, this now pushed to talk things out with the bf and apologise to him.. Then she asked him if anything was going on between is and he said no.. That we just friends,close friends.. He lied to her but opens up to me.. He says he doesnt want the girl to ask him to cut me off totally.. So the whole thing got him confused.. He says he's never double dated and he isnt happy that he's hurting me and im taking it... I asked him again if i should walk and he says no.. He does not want to lose me and i do not want to lose him either but i want to prove my love for him so that he one day sees that the girl, probably loves him but she's got no integrity.. And i purely love him.. But because i respect his relationship, i CAN NOT TELL HIM TO BREAK UP WITH HER but wanting him to see things himself but the question is for how long.. He says they are working things out now but he doesnt want to lose me esp as a friend... Difficult.. Out of God knows what, we agreed to let things flow since i will respect his relationship, like whenever his girl is around, i should make him believe that i will be fine.. Now, he isnt happy because he said if he hadnt met the gf, he'd have gone ahead to date me.. For me, i cannot sleep, ive been typing this since God knows when and this is 3:36am.. Since he is confused now, please people, friends, family, can i use love to make him see the difference between his girl and me.. He loves his girl, he is controlling his feelings for me and afraid to let it grow because he knows we'd bond, while my feelings toward him is real.. Money has not been involved in this.. We are 6months now.. I believe in true love and that it does not come easy.. Talk to me Y'll because i have no parents to talk to,, i would have talked to my mum now but she isnt here... I want to win with true love.. I turned 27 this past november and he turned 30 same november.. Thank You and God bless..

I sent you a PM, please reply

faithugo64:
I sent you a PM, please reply

Okay Sir..

Poorboy:
My only question is

Are you beautiful?

Because what you're doing is what ugly girls do.

I swear I thought about that too!! Maybe the op Na fine boy. Na so ugly girls dey like die for fine boy neck.

Gayatri:
Thank You Sir... But please do not act like i threw me on him... Many times i pushed him away, stopped talking to him and after a month he still came back... He stalked me even before he became my friend... You free to be harsh, i deserve it and ima do it.. I do not even stay in same city he does..

Don't get me wrong, I m not blaming you, he's desperate to keep you as a side chick. You are better than that option.

He wants to eat his cake and still have it.

Leave that unhealthy relationship and give your man the opportunity to find you

Gayatri:
Okay Sir..

I have replied Sir

IceColdVeins:
I swear I thought about that too!! Maybe the op Na fine boy. Na so ugly girls dey like die for fine boy neck.

If you want me to briefly put my photo here, i will.. O will put my pic and his and then you compare.. Should i

femi4:
Don't get me wrong, I m not blaming you, he's desperate to keep you as a side chick. You are better than that option.

He wants to eat his cake and still have it.

Leave that unhealthy relationship and give your man the opportunity to find you

I will Sir, thank you for the gracious words..

Gayatri:
I will Sir, thank you for the gracious words..

you are welcome

Gayatri:
If you want me to briefly put my photo here, i will.. O will put my pic and his and then you compare.. Should i

No you don’t have to do that buddy!! It’s just queer how you chose to settle for this less.

Gayatri:
So Sir, are you saying that if he truly loves his girl as he claimed, he would not have had eyes for me??

I can't say if he truly loves her but one thing is certain, he does not love you enough to commit to you and plan his future with you.

You're a side chick in this relationship, take it or leave it! And you know how these manipulative men hold on to their side chicks? By telling lies against their current partners making the side chicks feel like they're the saviours in the man's life.

Babe! Open your eyes! he's playing you, using you as an option and wasting your time. If he eventually marries you, he will still get a side chick and tell her all sorts of lies about you making you look like an assistant devil and she will think she's the saviour keeping him sane. That's what these cheating, manipulative men do.

The best thing you can do for yourself is to shut him out of your life. You don't need to tell him you're leaving him, just block all forms of communication from him and do everything within your power to keep him away from him.

Note this, a lot of babymamas out there started off like you. So don't even think getting pregnant for him will get him to leave his girlfriend for you.

IceColdVeins:
No you don’t have to do that buddy!! It’s just queer how you chose to settle for this less.

Thats it.. Ima disappointment in a big way and believe me even my Creator aint prouda me not even my late parents.. I wish not to even love at all like die single because the world is corrupt for anything true..

Gayatri:
I will Sir, thank you for the gracious words..

The part U said ur gathering strength to call and tell him about ur decision to leave him jst sums up
Ur weakness and he will capitalize on it either by crying or sweet talking u into seeing reasons with him... jst ghost him with no explanations
U owe him no explanations..
Don’t call and don’t pick his calls nor reply sms
Block him frm all social media
Start ur 2021 alone in peace and ur REAL serious minded man will locate you.
Stop the DRAMA already unless u enjoy it

dominique:
I can't say if he truly loves her but one thing is certain, he does not love you enough to commit to you and plan his future with you.

You're a side chick in this relationship, take it or leave it! And you know how these manipulative men hold on to their side chicks? By telling lies against their current partners making the side chicks feel like they're the saviours in the man's life.

Babe! Open your eyes! he's playing you, using you as an option and wasting your time. If he eventually marries you, he will still get a side chick and tell her all sorts of lies about you making you look like an assistant devil and she will think she's the saviour keeping him sane. That's what these cheating, manipulative men do.

The best thing you can do for yourself is to shut him out of your life. You don't need to tell him you're leaving him, just block all forms of communication from him and do everything within your power to keep him away from him.

Note this, a lot of babymamas out there started off like you. So don't even think getting pregnant for him will get him to leave his girlfriend for you.

Thoroughly heard you Sir! Thank You

mibrims:
The part U said ur gathering strength to call and tell him about ur decision to leave him jst sums up
Ur weakness and he will capitalize on it either by crying or sweet talking u into seeing reasons with him... jst ghost him with no explanations
U owe him no explanations..
Don’t call and don’t pick his calls nor reply sms
Block him frm all social media
Start ur 2021 alone in peace and ur REAL serious minded man will locate you.


Stop the DRAMA already unless u enjoy it

Thank you Sir,, i so appreciate this...

I don't have anything good to tell you since you have already given him sex, you are forcing yourself on someone who does not love you but using you, the day you stop believing the lies of men is the day you will find your own man and not someone's else man, you are officially a side girlfriend and he will continue sleeping with you while you keep consoling yourself with the lies he tells you. I have several men around me with sweet mouth and outrageous claims and promises, even married men with their big fat lies, but it doesn't move me a bit, as a lady you have to harden up your heart so that you will get the best out of these unfortunate generation of men.Let me tell you the bitter truth, your type don't end well with men because you have put your emotions ahead of your brains.See your replies sef mtcheww

He wants to have the cake and eat it

Gayatri:
Thats it.. Ima disappointment in a big way and believe me even my Creator aint prouda me not even my late parents.. I wish not to even love at all like die single because the world is corrupt for anything true..

Why you beating yourself nah.

It's happens.
Even some mature people got themselves really messed tOo when it comes to relationship so relax.
Make up your mind and move on.
I just hope you'd be strong enough to hang on cuz woman wey dey in love no dey too get sense like that .. Na men even come worse pass.

If he comes knocking and you see the genuinity then all the best..
I for like see ur foto too oo


@Zzor easy on OP nah.
She's just being mature and honest and I like that.

Zzor:
I don't have anything good to tell you since you have already given him sex, you are forcing yourself on someone who does not love you but using you, the day you stop believing the lies of men is the day you will find your own man and not someone's else man, you are officially a side girlfriend and he will continue sleeping with you while you keep consoling yourself with the lies he tells you. I have several men around me with sweet mouth and outrageous claims and promises, even married men with their big fat lies, but it doesn't move me a bit, as a lady you have to harden up your heart so that you will get the best out of these unfortunate generation of men.Let me tell you the bitter truth, your type don't end well with men because you have put your emotions ahead of your brains.See your replies sef mtcheww

I understand and appreciate your observation... Thank You... But i didnt create me...

Gayatri:
I do not know how to start this but i will write as it comes... I was in a 2 year relationship that ended in march this year.. I was so commited in it like naturally when im dating, i DO NOT notice other guys and i DO NOT ask my boyfriend for financial assistance because i feel im not his responsibility,, what i do appreciate mostly were little things like, chatting, kindness, hugs, opening and closing of doors for me,, just little things, coz i adore them so much.. But anyway it ended.. And i vowed never to date again come what may.. During the break up process, all my friends (guys, hardly have a girlfriend) were there to help me pull through.. Calls and texts constantly because, according to them, they knew my type, thus the help.. Funny enough, i never got attracted to any of them (even the ones that initially asked me out when my friendship with them was fresh) and im not the sex sex type to just fall for any to satisfy my desire.. Though i got advice from neighbours to find someone else than staying alone, i said no especially as i am a loner but a happy loner.. I keep myself busy with work or any stuff that makes me happy.

Fine, two months later (june), some guy reached out to me even as he knew he's got a girlfriend, whixh according to him later, they were in an open relationship.. He stays in oshogbo, his girl stays in kaduna while im in sagamu..Before then, he reached out online by first stalking me on facebook (even though we did same online business), after a while he got talking with me.. At first, i was harsh, very harsh to him but he never minded.. At a point i stopped talking to him.. A month later he reached out again, asking if we were still friends.. I was like yeah, not nice to him at all but he was patient with me..

From mid-july we started talking well as friends, he was very open as i was to him. We flowed well that things were happening to us coincidentally.. Whenever he yawns, i do at my place, if im having a scratch, he does too.. There was just plenty of this connection that we never got tired of each other.. In the procesa of our been honest, he told me about his girl and how she was still keeping her ex and all whatnots... I didnt feel any iota of jealousy because i had not feelings for him yet.. I asked to talk things through with his girl and he says well if she gave the chance.. So laters, by august, september,october, feelings grew.. He got so fond of me... According to him, he has not seen my type before.. Fine! During my birthday, he wanted to do something for me, i said no, then two weeks to his birthday in nov, he asked that i visit him at their family house, that i did..

What struck me most was how the elder brother (married) took care of me... I was not allowed to do nothing.. The brother even cooked for me.. God, it made me fall more for the family.. The kind gestures i have never experienced in my life.. There are kindnesses but there is kindness, the real one.. I felt it.. Every thing that i want in a man, those little things, this guy has them all.. According to him, it baffles him that with the little he shows me, i do not take for granted even before he told me he's having a girl..

When i returned home, we continued our normal talks and he then said, that his girlfriend would be visiting during his birthday.. At that point i went silent.. (Meanwhile he met his girl this year but before me, also during her break up).. He was unhappy that i displayed this little jealousy.. So he says he has not broken up with his girl to start a new relationship and he is hurting that he is hurting me.. He's got feelings for me but he loves his girl.. So i said i was going walk, even though i never meant it, twas hard to even say that but i had to and he says no... That he's become so attached to me even his family thinks he's dating me.. That he controls his feelings for me, could i do same and i said no.. I could not be friends with him when i know that feelings are involved.. Finally, we came to terms to just flow with things since he was not engaged or married to her.. Even so, this guy just lost his job and he says unlike his girl, im the one pushing him to have something doing, he says i help him alot but i wouldnt know.. So we continued to let the whole feelings to flow until last week, when with my help, he was called for an interview in lagos..

As usual we talked and i wished him well.. I always pray for him.. In lagos, we talked well until the third day, our communication changed and before it did, my heart was literally aching, so i knew something was wrong.. I called to know why but he was telling me that he'd let me in when he got back to oshogbo, which he did.. He said his girlfriend who was having something to do with her ex, called him and wanted to settle things with him.. But the truth is, because this lady already had his facebook password when they were together in kadauna, she 3 days before her birthday on the 8th of this month wanted to know why her boyfriend was no longer perturbed over her behaviour, so she saw my chats with the guy and decided to do something,,, this now pushed to talk things out with the bf and apologise to him.. Then she asked him if anything was going on between is and he said no.. That we just friends,close friends.. He lied to her but opens up to me.. He says he doesnt want the girl to ask him to cut me off totally.. So the whole thing got him confused.. He says he's never double dated and he isnt happy that he's hurting me and im taking it... I asked him again if i should walk and he says no.. He does not want to lose me and i do not want to lose him either but i want to prove my love for him so that he one day sees that the girl, probably loves him but she's got no integrity.. And i purely love him.. But because i respect his relationship, i CAN NOT TELL HIM TO BREAK UP WITH HER but wanting him to see things himself but the question is for how long.. He says they are working things out now but he doesnt want to lose me esp as a friend... Difficult.. Out of God knows what, we agreed to let things flow since i will respect his relationship, like whenever his girl is around, i should make him believe that i will be fine.. Now, he isnt happy because he said if he hadnt met the gf, he'd have gone ahead to date me.. For me, i cannot sleep, ive been typing this since God knows when and this is 3:36am.. Since he is confused now, please people, friends, family, can i use love to make him see the difference between his girl and me.. He loves his girl, he is controlling his feelings for me and afraid to let it grow because he knows we'd bond, while my feelings toward him is real.. Money has not been involved in this.. We are 6months now.. I believe in true love and that it does not come easy.. Talk to me Y'll because i have no parents to talk to,, i would have talked to my mum now but she isnt here... I want to win with true love.. I turned 27 this past november and he turned 30 same november.. Thank You and God bless..

dump the guy and do it fast. A man knows what he wants. I was married when I met my current woman. I weighed both within a month and dumped my ex wife instantly.



If he loves you as you do to him he'd have dumped the other lady. And to think the idiot has no job, he's only using you for cruise.



Dump the weyrey cos I de vex now