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How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 8:40am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


I am not buying anything, the chat is from months back.
Some of us are quite introverted, we don’t know these things and people capitalize on it to play us. Two of my friends told me he would hurt me. I kept asking him questions and he kept twisting details. I met 3 of his family members and they didn’t say anything, they were welcoming. I guess they all want him to remarry and felt he has told me he is married.
I believe you are wiser and better now, but were you expecting his family members to give you a clue, no they won't except they have some weirdo like me among them lol ,just be very careful next time and build a strong wall around yourself, so strong that whoever succeeded in breaking that wall will eventually be your man.Just be very careful, and keep your distance from that man, even if his marriage will break make sure you are not the reason. God bless you.

15 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 8:40am On Dec 12, 2020
shortgun:

I understand you, u should know that at the end he finally did the right thing by telling you b4 sleeping with you.
Many men who are after ur body or wants to continue to decieve u wont do this.
He may also be in a state of confusion the time you guys started, he was also afraid of losing you...these are all normal human behaviours.

At this stage it all depends on what you want.


I thanked him for telling me after almost 5 months of knowing him,lolzz. The chat is an old one, we haven’t seen since then. I ran into his friend yesterday, reminded me of him and I decided to share my experience.
Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by daewoorazer(m): 9:01am On Dec 12, 2020
shortgun:

Will you stop this Nonsense!
Do you know her? Have u been to her closet ?
Stop typing like a frustrated person.

for the questions above and more, visit www.google.com

And let me know once you dm her...simp

1 Like

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by CsRockefeller(m): 9:10am On Dec 12, 2020
You sound like a good girl. That leads me to the next question, why do good girls fall for bad Boyz?

Your friend who is obviously more experience in dating saw this and gave you the red flag, but you were too clouded by his theatrics.

That guy knew what he was doing all along, no guy, not one is a fool.

12 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 9:12am On Dec 12, 2020
CsRockefeller:
You sound like a good girl. That leads me to the next question, why do good girls fall for bad Boyz?

I didn’t fall for a bad boy, I fell for a man who deceived me into thinking he is good.

3 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by CsRockefeller(m): 9:15am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


I didn’t fall for a bad boy, I fell for a man who deceived me into thinking he is good.

My dear that's the issue, you must see behind the mask. Everyone wears one, everyone including you and I.

You probably saw behind it but you were scared to do the next step, which is to ask questions and get satisfactory answer.

Always learn to look behind the mask in dealing with people.

4 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Djtm(m): 9:19am On Dec 12, 2020
Must have been very painful. I hope you heal

3 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by tppzzy01(m): 9:21am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


Would have been better if I did this...unfortunately, he was the one that deceived me.
Can you chat me up privately?
Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 9:22am On Dec 12, 2020
CsRockefeller:


My dear that's the issue, you must see behind the mask. Everyone wears one, everyone including you and I.

You probably saw behind it but you were scared to do the next step, which is to ask questions and get satisfactory answer.

Always learn to look behind the mask in dealing with people.

I asked questions. I can’t say all he said because the world is a small place and someone close might be reading, but he had answers and alibis. His family is not in Nigeria, so it all aligned for him. Believe me, I asked and he answered. Due to the nature of our jobs, I couldn’t be policing him, not like I would have if I had all the time.

You are right at looking behind the mask. I am a very trusting person, everyone kept telling me I will learn the hard way soon.

4 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 9:27am On Dec 12, 2020
CsRockefeller:


Your friend who is obviously more experience in dating saw this and gave you the red flag, but you were too clouded by his theatrics.

My friend has had a bad experience with someone who lied about his background, she is quite paranoid on relationships issues. You know how paranoid people are.. you can’t be so sure when it is logic or their paranoia speaking. She is also very protective of me, keeps telling me I am too innocent for Nigerian men. I found that stereotypical and I would tell her some are good.

I couldn’t bring myself to tell her exactly what happened...

3 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Saccharine: 9:34am On Dec 12, 2020
Sorry for your pain,you will heal with time.
Next time,do your due diligence, Facebook,LinkedIn, Instagram etc before throwing your heart into anyone.

Married people get bored and start seeking excitement, its unfortunate that you're a victim.
If he was honest in the first place,at least you would have had the option to go ahead or to reject him.

The whole 'my wife is evil' thing is probably a lie told to butter you up.Its the usual line.

I can assure you that you're not the only girl he's been seeing,the whole point of cheating is sex,he wasn't having sex with you so he must have been getting it from somewhere seeing as his so called ' evil 'wife is abroad.

Hope you get smarter and more level headed in any relationships going forward.

Pele

14 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by CsRockefeller(m): 9:35am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


I asked questions. I can’t say all he said because the world is a small place and someone close might be reading, but he had answers and alibis. His family is not in Nigeria, so it all aligned for him. Believe me, I asked and he answered. Due to the nature of our jobs, I couldn’t be policing him, not like I would have if I had all the time.

You are right at looking behind the mask. I am a very trusting person, everyone kept telling me I will learn the hard way soon.

Don't be too hard on yourself, even with the best due diligence relationship mishaps happen to the best of us.

I was also like you, trusting and giving people the benefit of the doubt in every facet of life but I found out that living that way is like living in a fools paradise. Life is short, brutish and rough, if anyone is to get your trust let them earn it, so much that if you get played everyone would be surprised.

You're 25 tall and doing well so, it shouldn't be tough attracting suitors but let anyone who wants to get in earn it. STOP TRUSTING AT FACE VALUE IT HAS LED EVEN PRESIDENT'S TO THEIR GRAVES (E.G MURITALA, JOHN KENNEDY)

12 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by DukeJoe17: 9:40am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…





There is nothing strange here, his handsomeness got your pussy dripping for him, this guy is a real niggar, he just hurt you with the truth so that you won't blame him of using and dumping you tomorrow rather he makes you dump yourself.
Believe me, if you have mistakenly continue dating him, he could have cemmented his dick in your pussy for ever.
There is more joy in bleeping a pussy without commitment hahaha.

Baddest niggar.

13 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 9:42am On Dec 12, 2020
DukeJoe17:



There is nothing strange here, his handsomeness got your pussy dripping for him, this guy is a real niggar, he just hurt you with the truth so that you won't blame him of using and dumping you tomorrow rather he makes you dump yourself.
Believe me, if you have mistakenly continue dating him, he could have cemmented his dick in your pussy for ever.
There is more joy in bleeping a pussy without commitment hahaha.

Baddest niggar.

It is okay... I am learning the ways of men.

3 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by DukeJoe17: 9:45am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


It is okay... I am learning the ways of men.


You can keep learning forever but you can never master it, same way girls are crafty too.

6 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 9:49am On Dec 12, 2020
Saccharine:
Sorry for your pain,you will heal with time.
Next time,do your due diligence, Facebook,LinkedIn, Instagram etc before throwing your heart into anyone.

Married people get bored and start seeking excitement, its unfortunate that you're a victim.
If he was honest in the first place,at least you would have had the option to go ahead or to reject him.

The whole 'my wife is evil' thing is probably a lie told to butter you up.Its the usual line.

I can assure you that you're not the only girl he's been seeing,the whole point of cheating is sex,he wasn't having sex with you so he must have been getting it from somewhere seeing as his so called ' evil 'wife is abroad.

Hope you get smarter and more level headed in any relationships going forward.

Pele

He said the girl before me was aware, but was with him for money.

My friend checked LinkedIn when she wouldn’t stop suspecting him and saw nothing incriminating. Nothing on FB, she didn’t find him. She told me to get more information for her, kept telling me to search his house. Lolzz, smarter and less trusting. Thank you
Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by jimmychang: 9:51am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


We never had penetrative sex, I have never had penetrative sex. The messages are from our past chat, I only cleared the chat after creating this thread. I have not set my eyes on him since then. He has called with other numbers, but that has been it.

Plz, you can reserve the “hoe” tag for your loved ones if it is such a pleasant name. Using it randomly on people you do not know is a not a sign of good upbringing.




You guys here are all about the dick, dick is everywhere, but I have lived 25yrs of my life without it and I didn’t die. I was only hurt he lied to me and led me on. Some of us are trusting. I know people that would have ransacked his house and social media pages, but I didn’t do that. I am not even on Facebook and Instagram. He preyed on the fact that I am quite private and trusting, direct your misgivings to him!!



Why do good people like you meet bad people is one of the things I don't understand....my only happiness is that he didn't mess you up .... grin grin..Na another story e for be .


Friends like you I will go all the way to protect them ...I have friends like that ..Just too innocent for this bleeped up world..... You will be fine my dear.


Please try to be a little snoopy ..infact turn snoop Dog grin grin...Protect yourself please because the fact that you are good doesn't make other humans good....

14 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by jimmychang: 9:53am On Dec 12, 2020
jimmychang:




Why do good people like you meet bad people is one of the things I don't understand....my only happiness is that he didn't mess you up .... grin grin..Na another story e for be .


Friends like you I will go all the way to protect them ...I have friends like that ..Just too innocent for this bleeped up world..... You will be fine my dear.
Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 9:58am On Dec 12, 2020
jimmychang:




Why do good people like you meet bad people is one of the things I don't understand....my only happiness is that he didn't mess you up .... grin grin..Na another story e for be .


Friends like you I will go all the way to protect them ...I have friends like that ..Just too innocent for this bleeped up world..... You will be fine my dear.


Please try to be a little snoopy ..infact turn snoop Dog grin grin...Protect yourself please because the fact that you are good doesn't make other humans good....

Lolzzzz!! I have learnt nah. Snoop doggy dog henceforth. I hate to live that life of suspecting a partner, but like you said, not everyone is good.

6 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 10:05am On Dec 12, 2020
Csrockefeller what happened to your post?were you banned by antispambot? Lalasticlala pls help unban him.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Saccharine: 10:09am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


He said the girl before me was aware, but was with him for money.

My friend checked LinkedIn when she wouldn’t stop suspecting him and saw nothing incriminating. Nothing on FB, she didn’t find him. She told me to get more information for her, kept telling me to search his house. Lolzz, smarter and less trusting. Thank you

So this person has been doing this for a while ? Ahhh.The way people were calling him a good guy,like he just innocently fell for you meanwhile Oga is a master dribbler.

He was probably thinking this 'confession' ,his chants of love and fake tears would make you continue with him.Skilled manipulator using reverse psychology

You're lucky you escaped without fully giving up the cookie. cheesy

In relationships,always endeavour to assess constantly with a clear head.

Youll be fine.

We all live and learn.

13 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Romanoff(f): 10:13am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


The post clearly says that I have let him go. He knew I would block him, that should tell you something...he knows what I stand for. He knows I wouldn’t be his accomplice

Thank God. You will meet a single man deserving of you.

4 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by LordKO(m): 10:21am On Dec 12, 2020
I wager he disingenuously conditioned and played you. Unless he wasn't discerning enough to know that you're from strong ethical leanings - I only assumed you to be - before he played you, his actions and inactions were premeditated, and his assumed remorse is fake. If the latter is the case, which I believe is, it is a timeless approach usually employed when dealing with haughty/conceited or opportunistic people.

11 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Bigdik70inch2(m): 11:02am On Dec 12, 2020
uncleck:

You see, why I said he's a good man is because men have superior thought process. He could have led you on if he had wanted. He could have made you change to a stupid being if he had wanted. Even if you suspected him, he could still have had his way. But he chosed not to rush you in sex even when it was obvious he could have his way as much as he wanted. He choosed to not hurt you more and ended it.

He is ignorant because he doesn't know that if he had opened up to you during one of your initial dates, you could still have liked him. Women are simply emotional and devoid of logic.


Lol......
I guess u didn't read through....she said the niggar massaged her in the hotel and gave her head too....isn't pussy licking sex??

10 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Bigdik70inch2(m): 11:14am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


Would have been better if I did this...unfortunately, he was the one that deceived me.

STOP DIS LAMENTATION!!!!!?
Something keep whispering to me u ain't this innocent......or he wasn't dat perfect in deceiving you...........U SAW THE SIGNS BUT THEN U IGNORED IT,RIGHT

1 Like

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Sanchez01: 11:16am On Dec 12, 2020
daewoorazer:


You’re still a hoe with a hole.. who cares if you’ve had penetrative sex or not...if I realize u keep a battalion of Dildos in your closet, na to flog ur bumbum
Some of you are not properly brought up and it is troubling because the number multiplies across cyberspace on a daily basis.

26 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by bukatyne(f): 11:18am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…




25yrs to 36yrs?

Babes why?

A 36yr old guy (almost 40?) to your young self?

Maybe my bias speaking here.

Anyways, good you came out of it and Bobo is a gamer, forget all the years and apology.

He probably realized you would not give up sex soon that's why he jumped to the next person.

@family welcoming you: some families are legit useless and immoral. Or since they are Muslims, he told them he wants to marry you.

Ask your friends what they saw in him then you can pick the logical stuffs for further learning.

Good luck.

3 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Sanchez01: 11:24am On Dec 12, 2020
Heartbrokengirl:


Lolzzzz!! I have learnt nah. Snoop doggy dog henceforth. I hate to live that life of suspecting a partner, but like you said, not everyone is good.
Sorry about your plight though. I wouldn't advise you you snoop in subsequent relationships. I believe why you got played was because you failed to do due diligence on him. Often times, the blameless, perfect man is one with a woman at home OR one who is single but has grown over time. Sadly, they fall into the former category, for the most part.

There will always be indicators that something isn't right but the voice of love and emotion often overshadows all others. Snooping isn't the way to good. If you ask the right questions, you will always find a questionable response that could give clues on what the other person is lying about or not willing to share. But does it mean you can rely on their words alone? Well, that is subjective.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 11:32am On Dec 12, 2020
Sanchez01:

Sorry about your plight though. I wouldn't advise you you snoop in subsequent relationships. I believe why you got played was because you failed to do due diligence on him. Often times, the blameless, perfect man is one with a woman at home OR one who is single but has grown over time. Sadly, they fall into the former category, for the most part.

There will always be indicators that something isn't right but the voice of love and emotion often overshadows all others. Snooping isn't the way to good. If you ask the right questions, you will always find a questionable response that could give clues on what the other person is lying about or not willing to share. But does it mean you can rely on their words alone? Well, that is subjective.

There was no indicator to me and I can’t think of any indicator that won’t go off when you meet a man’s family and they are nice to you.

Thanks for your advice

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Angelacruz: 11:33am On Dec 12, 2020
Sorry babe,its time to move on.
Heartbrokengirl:


Nairalanders and insults. How exactly am I the side hoe here? Someone clearly looked me in the face and lied to me many times and I am the hoe?

Are you always like this or you are faking it?

I don’t need your advice, I advised myself and left him for his wife and family.


Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by Nobody: 11:34am On Dec 12, 2020
bukatyne:


25yrs to 36yrs?

Babes why?

A 36yr old guy (almost 40?) to your young self?

Maybe my bias speaking here.

Anyways, good you came out of it and Bobo is a gamer, forget all the years and apology.

He probably realized you would not give up sex soon that's why he jumped to the next person.

@family welcoming you: some families are legit useless and immoral. Or since they are Muslims, he told them he wants to marry you.

Ask your friends what they saw in him then you can pick the logical stuffs for further learning.

Good luck.

I have stated my friend’s reason, “men are not to be trusted”. Aside that, she said he looks like a player. I don’t know how players look, I only know he is quite good-looking.

Good luck to you too

2 Likes

Re: How I Ended My Relationship With A Married Man by shortgun(m): 11:45am On Dec 12, 2020
daewoorazer:


for the questions above and more, visit www.google.com

And let me know once you dm her...simp
You need to learn to behave in a public forum like this.
Calling someone u don't know derogatory names will not add a penny to ur bank account, it will do u no good.

I am not after d OP or any girl on this forum, Never sent a PM to any female in my over 5yrs in this forum...I hv my hands full offline cheesy
Just stop calling someone's daughter and sister a hoe when u don't even know them., it makes u sound like a lunatic.
If u like follow wisdom

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