Pierocash:
Forget about the child, focus on your family by law he isn't your child.

What do you know about paternity.?

Avoid fornication! We no go hear... It comes with alot of baggages. Unprotected sex for that matter.

Talk to your wife first and you two can take it up from there.

In this present life and times... If you genuinely have Peace of mind, you don't know what the Lord has done for you.

Forget about the child if you are wise..
Ur ex kept u away from this child cos u were broke, now her hubby is broke, she is using this same child to get to you cos u are now money ok. Don't destroy ur real family by yourself.

Thanks folks, I discussed with her about the paternity test.
She agreed. Will be checking up a few hospitals in Lagos and pricing too.

Will tell wify much later. This has a potential of wrecking my home. I hope it doesn't.

Can I custody the child and atleast my wife wouldn't know, maybe give him to my mum or sister?

If this story is true, The kid may not even be yours or the husband’s.

charles009:

Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.

At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.


The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.

I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.

I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...

Mature advise please...

I fear who no fear woman.

Can anyone beat this manipulator and strategist?

Reminds me about not putting all eggs in one basket

slimjohn2k5:
No one is thinking of the other guy that lost his job.
After losing your job, your wife tells you that probably your only child is not yours, that will be a terrible one ohhhh.
I don't have advice for this but consider the guy that lost his job, also both of u cannot hide it for too long. Uhh

Hmm. That's another angle.

It's a delicate matter. It's like a fly perching on your blokus.

charles009:


Thank u

No wahala

Hmmn, flee fornication, flee from sex before marriage, they will not hear.

This your ex must be Godpikin4real

Pierocash:
Forget about the child, focus on your family by law he isn't your child.

This is harsh but....

Guess you want to shake two families but it's obvious the lady does not care about hers..... Watch from a close distance what is yours will walk to you at the perfect time

slimjohn2k5:
No one is thinking of the other guy that lost his job.
After losing your job, your wife tells you that probably your only child is not yours, that will be a terrible one ohhhh.
I don't have advice for this but consider the guy that lost his job, also both of u cannot hide it for too long. Uhh

the jobless guy fit vex kee the woman oo

charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.

At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.


The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.

I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.

I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...

Mature advise please...

Please focus on your immediate family and don’t be a reason to crash that marriage. Women can be tricky, once her husband recovers from the set back stories will definitely change.
Don’t be carried away by the prevailing circumstances, tomorrow is pregnant they say

AND SO









GO CHANNELS OR CNN






LIE LIE CLOWN

slimjohn2k5:
No one is thinking of the other guy that lost his job.
After losing your job, your wife tells you that probably your only child is not yours, that will be a terrible one ohhhh.
I don't have advice for this but consider the guy that lost his job, also both of u cannot hide it for too long. Uhh

the most sensible comment so far

Nato008:

forgiveness.... for what crime, he didn't cheat did he...rather he should sit the wife down and explain the situation

My thoughts exactly. Except if he was dating her while dating or married to his current wife.

charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.

At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.


The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.

I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.

I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...

Mature advise please...

You have two options: Either ignore the other lady and her claims or you tell your wife everything before making any move, if you value your marriage.

If you can get your wife on your side this will be an easy matter. If this revelation will threaten your marriage, completely ignore the other lady or get her to confess that she initially said the baby wasn't yours, for evidence.

woleabayo:
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO SIT YOUR WIFE DOWN AND EXPLAIN EVERYTHING TO HER AND BEG HER TO FORGIVE YOU

Which forgiveness. Did he do it intentionally? If the lady had not lied to him he probably would have told the wife he has another child somewhere and if she wouldn't mind they would have still married one another. But since he was lied to. He only needs to explain to the wife. If the wife truly loves him she has to understand. More so if the age of the child shows he was not born after his marriage then the wife should understand that it is not an arrangee story.

Okay na

That kid is n0t urs OP. SHES PLAYING YOU BECAUSE SHE IS FACING HARD TIME. TAKE CARE OF ANUDA MAN S0N AND SHE GO KUM BAK TO CLAIM THE KID AGAIN

The reason she told you the child is yours is because you're doing okay. If you're broker than her broke husband I believe she would have kept silent.

OP. Never allow evil take care of a child. If I were you I would speak to my wife, if possible involve her parents to try help tell her to understand and take the child out of that evil woman's hands.

Imagine she wants to divorce her Husband because he's broke. What nonsense. Whatever happened to for better for worse.

That woman is terrible and she doesn't deserve to raise any kid.

Roseey0:
Option 1
People donating egg or sperm dont claim ownership of a child. Fatherhood goes beyond DNA.

Why is she telling you now?
Because things are not going well for her spouse.
She is mad.
Let her carry her cross. If she was a President's wife, will she remember to tell you?

See yourself as a sperm donor.Noting more.
The boy already has a father who has been going all out to take care of him not minding his current circumstance. I repeat, you are not his father. You only donated sperm. Focus on your family and the children who You father.

Please tell your wife the story first before she hear it outside. Cut that ex off totally.

Option 2
Blood is thicker than water.
If she is saying she can't take care of the child any longer, you can offer to bring him into your home and raise him completely.
No attachee or child support thingy.
Just hand over pikin to you and you raise him. If Not, make she carry her cross. Wash your hand comlt. You have done your part

honestly,, uve just spoken my mind,,2 bottles of stout for uu

Pierocash:
Forget about the child, focus on your family by law he isn't your child.

don't do this is pay back insist to have your child back talk to your wife about it first talk to your immediate family first if your wife parents are alive tell him first then hear what he have to say then seat your wife down and explain everything to her give her assurance take your child and break that your ex home she's a witch

Another first born living in another mans house.

Dem wan do unlimited cash out.. consider the life of her husband,do DNA and see if the fool is saying the truth

faithfull18:
Hmmn, flee fornication, flee from sex before marriage, they will not hear.

Abeg make we hear word. Aunty holier than thou.

Forget resemblance..... What the common sense require is to do the DNA test first, after the result proofs positive, next step is to talk to your wife about it, finally take your Son and refurbish his life.... Shikenah

charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.

At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.


The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.

I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.

I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...

Mature advise please...

I understand how you don't want your blood to suffer and I also understand how you don't want to tell your wife about another child. These days, most of us don't want to have anything to do with polygamy or anything that disrupts our family peace. I'd advise you go do a DNA test for the child and if he turns out to be your child, sit your wife down and explain everything to her. Thankfully, it happened before you met her and you didn't have any idea you had a child before marrying her. Make provisions to take care of the boy but don't bring him into your house so as to avoid scattering your home. As the child grows older, watch how your wife adjusts to the reality on ground and see if she's open to him coming in. I know you are the head of the house but you can't forcefully bring that child in without you both agreeing to it. She has a right to not want to be involved in a polygamous relationship and as such, you can't force a child from someone else on her to take care of. Just use wisdom and tact in managing the situation.

People forget that you have things like Ancestry.com and 23andMe where many people carry out DNA tests for themselves and it reveals relatives who have also done the tests and agreed for their data to be linked to relatives. Its becoming very popular and many people have discovered things about themselves. Its only a matter of time before it becomes popular in Nigeria and the truth starts coming out. Go on Youtube and see what people have discovered about themselves..