| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by faithfull18(f): 5:44pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
joseph1832:
Abeg make we hear word. Aunty holier than thou. You are hearing oh, a lot of these issues wouldn't arise if everybody abstained till marriage and also keep to their spouses after marriage. @OP carry your cross. 1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:44pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
First do a DNA if you can afford it. If positive don't take back your child... Its better the husband finds out himself Or the wife tells him Support the child from afar... Best by helping your ex's husband... Why will she think of divorce because of hardship?... She is not a good woman Don't get close to her in any way sensual... Do to others what you will want them do unto you. 1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Champneys: 5:44pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
Are you insane? How are you sure the child is yours? Because your friends mentioned the striking resemblance?! Is that enough? Anyway, if you can help the woman, do so and do the needful regarding confirming the paternity of the child! |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by joseph1832(m): 5:45pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
faithfull18:
You are hearing oh, a lot of these issues wouldn't arise if everybody abstained till marriage. bla bla bla. Even within the confine of marriage this thing still happen. So what are you saying. |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Offpoint1: 5:46pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
Become a proxy or an anonymous father  Once the truth is out, I bet my balls the 2 marriages will crumble. |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Worksunlimited: 5:46pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
woleabayo:
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO SIT YOUR WIFE DOWN AND EXPLAIN EVERYTHING TO HER AND BEG HER TO FORGIVE YOU What's there to forgive? |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Miracle1991: 5:46pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
TJaguar:
What kind of comment is this  the truth is bitter abi? |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by richmanrichard: 5:47pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
CalliDora1:
Learn to zip up and save us all this stories. If you didn't go there she won't add you to the list. read again to understand. |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:47pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
See just DNA for that child, if it's positive
Don't take the child from her o
Your wife will mistreat that child and see him as a threat as your first fruit.
Just send upkeep money for the child and pay his school fees directly to the school account.
Ur ex won't mistreat her own child so he will be well fed with the upkeep money unlike your wife.
I am only concerned about the future of that child you guys are going be tampering with 2 Likes |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by sylve11: 5:48pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Godbless3(m): 5:48pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
If you're planning to sit your wife down to discuss, just make sure DNA has confirm that the Child is your. |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by famiebee(f): 5:48pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
Please carry your wife along in every steps you’re taking
Thank God, it’s not your fault, she will understand with time
God will give you the wisdom to apply 1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by MansoryMX(m): 5:48pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
I can’t advice you on what to do but one advice I will give you as a fellow married man is TELL YOUR WIFE THE ENTIRE SITUATION even before you take a step of doing DNA. It’s best she heard it from mouth because of kasala burst and she hear am from another person mouth, YOUR OWN DONE FINISH BE THAT! 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Slynation(m): 5:48pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
CalliDora1:
Learn to zip up and save us all this stories. If you didn't go there she won't add you to the list. perhaps you didn't process the post very well, you will observe that was before he met his current wife... |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Dukeolumidemans(m): 5:49pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
Omo I fear who no fear women...and guys wey no de zip up. Anything can come out from either of them. As regards to the subject above, my solution is simple. 1. Don't tell ur wife first. 2. Do a DNA test to confirm. 3. If he is urs, inform ur wife if she is not hot tempered. 4. If she is hot tempered, write a Will and wear a Bullet Proof vest before u go and tell her. 5. Any other quorapo with the woman, carry ur wife along otherwise, ur own don kpeme. I rest my case...  1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:49pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
woleabayo:
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO SIT YOUR WIFE DOWN AND EXPLAIN EVERYTHING TO HER AND BEG HER TO FORGIVE YOU The way you people reason one-sided here baffles me. So this is the advice you will give every man who comes to you with this problem? And if not what makes you think this will solve the problem he will have with his wife? |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Ogilinsaka: 5:49pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
My advice is to contact your SMAN members 1 Like 
|
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Ganjafama(m): 5:49pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Thanks folks, I discussed with her about the paternity test.
She agreed. Will be checking up a few hospitals in Lagos and pricing too.
Will tell wify much later. This has a potential of wrecking my home. I hope it doesn't.
Can I custody the child and atleast my wife wouldn't know, maybe give him to my mum or sister? Has she told her husband? Well, whatever you do you must tell your wife. If the test turn out positive you either let him remain with the mum while you support him financially and emotionally or you take him to your mum or sister. Don't, I repeat , don't bring him into your home. 2 Likes |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Klass99(f): 5:50pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
11 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by MadamExcellency: 5:50pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
Bennysam:
Confirm the child is yours with a DNA test , if the child is yours then tell your wife how it happened I believe she will understand Understand that the first heir of the family is not hers? It will take grace to accept. |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Ogilinsaka: 5:51pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
Uglychicki:
See just DNA for that child, if it's positive
Don't take the child from her o
Your wife will mistreat that child and see him as a threat as your first fruit.
Just send upkeep money for the child and pay his school fees directly to the school account.
Ur ex won't mistreat her own child so he will be well fed with the upkeep money unlike your wife.
I am only concerned about the future of that child you guys are going be tampering with He is broke AKA SMAN. He doesn't have 500k for DNA test so don't go there 1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by tabaski: 5:51pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
I'm in the same dilemma. The only difference is the child gender and age. Also happened before I got married. Was told about the child in November 2020. |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by LongNipple(m): 5:52pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
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| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by meobizy(f): 5:52pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
This story is so cliche that I refuse to believe it. I will offer advice anyway. She swore that you weren’t the father then blocked you so she could marry. For all I know that child is not yours. Tell her to send you pictures of her other children. It will shock you that those same friends will claim they resemble you. 2 Likes |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:54pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
May your DNA mix last eternally on the blueprint of substrate of this plane of existence and beyond. It is true that you had sex with the woman and the product of that sex is being raised by another family, whose wife you once slept with. But you are not the child's parent. Parenting is beyond sexual reproduction of a specie. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by harmony75: 5:54pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
let your wife know about this development it's not your fault is your past so she should understand and bear with you then you go for DNA |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:54pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
Block her on all social media too and zero your mind. You'll have peace. Talking from experience. 3 Likes |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Klass99(f): 5:55pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
1 Like |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by richmanrichard: 5:55pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
Roseey0:
Option 1
People donating egg or sperm dont claim ownership of a child. Fatherhood goes beyond DNA.
Why is she telling you now?
Because things are not going well for her spouse.
She is mad.
Let her carry her cross. If she was a President's wife, will she remember to tell you?
See yourself as a sperm donor.Noting more.
The boy already has a father who has been going all out to take care of him not minding his current circumstance. I repeat, you are not his father. You only donated sperm. Focus on your family and the children who You father.
Please tell your wife the story first before she hear it outside. Cut that ex off totally.
Option 2
Blood is thicker than water.
If she is saying she can't take care of the child any longer, you can offer to bring him into your home and raise him completely.
No attachee or child support thingy.
Just hand over pikin to you and you raise him. If Not, make she carry her cross. Wash your hand comlt. You have done your part
you wud make a good mother.the most wise n applicable solution commented so far.bae u ar wise 2 Likes |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Abfinest007(m): 5:55pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
wahala for who never do DNA |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:55pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Thanks folks, I discussed with her about the paternity test.
She agreed. Will be checking up a few hospitals in Lagos and pricing too.
Will tell wify much later. This has a potential of wrecking my home. I hope it doesn't.
Can I custody the child and atleast my wife wouldn't know, maybe give him to my mum or sister? You did this before your marriage? So it won't wreck your marriage, your wife will come to terms after struggling with unexpected news. For me you don't need to bring the child back after due tests. But if you do,severe every form of communication with your ex,she has an ulterior motive. She is only looking for where the grass is green,she doesn't want a place where the ground is capable of sprouting green grass or even partake in nurturing it. Run away from such woman. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: My Ex Said Her Son Is Mine - Please Advise by Nobody: 5:57pm On Jan 14, 2021 |
charles009:
Good people of nairaland,
Everything you are about to read is not fiction but certain reality.
At the heat of this DNA wahala, a married Ex called me on 6th of Jan to notify me that her son is mine and not her husbands. I remember vividly a certain Saturday in 2015, when we argued intensely over the paternity of the child during her pregnancy. She insisted it was her boyfriends, make una fear women. She swore she was single. Our calculations showed she was ovulating while we had some encounters. She proceeded to block me on all social media platforms and 2 months later, her friend informed me of her wedding.
The issue here is that I am married with two kids and expecting another, she told me her husband lost his job early 2018 and it has been a very rough patch for her family. she says she wants a divorce.
I asked for the boys pictures and it put instant tears to my eyes. Showed a few friends and the resemblance is striking so they said. The most painful of all, he looks not properly looked after.
I am doing fairly OK now, I wouldn't wanna to see my blood suffer, if you were in my shoes how would you handle this. My wife would not want to hear of another child...
Mature advise please...
Did you ask yourself why she waited until her husband lost his job before remembering that the boy is your son? 1 Like |
