LadySarah:


She didn't say it to my face rather to my husband. So I didn't even know she was harbouring such. The kind of life I'm living now, everybody is begging me to visit them that they've missed me/my kids Blabla bla, I say no! Dey your dey Biko.Even this Dec she still stylishly asked through my bro if I will come,i said no. Later you will gossip me.
My in-laws are more at ease with me than their son.What am I hoarding that I will leave this world with?Let my kids enjoy their papas ppl.
It was the only warning my father gave to my mom.
You cut off a whole family just cos of marriage. SMH.
I just look at her and laff

Wow...see better wife material....!! I hope I get your type when I finally make up my mind to settle down...but for now, I'm scared of marriage

After reading all the comments, all I can say is dat Opinion is like a nose everybody get His/Her own. I rest my case.

ImaIma1:
How do we know what the truth is? It didn't seem like it was the cooking in her kitchen and serving his friend that was the issue.

The OP was obviously economical with the whole truth. Someone who has such entitlement mentality about his brother's acquisitions.

Does he treat his brother's wife with respect or he treats her like a leech that came to take his place in his brother's house?

It is not news that some wives can be territorial especially with husband's family. Everyone should learn to respect each other's space.

All this husband's family fighting the wife is becoming old. Left to some, the won't allow their brother get married so that they can have his undivided attention.

I think you are far too intelligent for this thread. Some want to think the wife was insane and acted without provocation when the brother-in-law who opened the thread was obviously economical with the truth.

Op, please, don't marry so you and your siblings can enjoy your house and pot of soup in peace.

ImaIma1:


You don't seem to read to understand. I did not mention her mother. Read my question again:

When you get married and your wife puts to bed especially through cesarean section that need care and lots of healing. YOUR mum and YOUR sister are the ones who come to do the omugwo. Who do you think should be doing the cooking for everyone to eat at that time?

Like this isn't an intelligent question at all.

What is the meaning of omugwoif you no the meaning then you have your answer
.
She needs there help that why they came.

budaatum:

I think you are far too intelligent for this thread. Some want to think the wife was insane and acted without provocation when the brother-in-law who opened the thread was obviously economical with the truth.

Op, please, don't marry so you are your siblings can enjoy your house and pot of soup in peace.

So if he provoked her the next thing is to throw the boy out can she throw her sibling out

So my bro wife throw me out of is house and I will have good relationship with the family going forward

Godoverevery:

Like this isn't an intelligent question at all.

What is the meaning of omugwoif you no the meaning then you have your answer
.
She needs there help that why they came.

Sweetheart relax. Stop getting worked up. Whether you think it is an intelligent question or not, it happened.

And it happened that the wife who just had a cesarean was the one climbing bikes to the market and cooking for her husband's mother and younger sisters till they left.

When the wife now has her second child and insists that she wants her own family, someone that doesn't have sense will say she doesn't like her husband's family.

I am not someone who is partial or does eye service. I will pick who makes my life easier over who makes it harder. And I will have my strong reasons and evidence before doing so in such a way that even the dumbest person will understand and agree.

budaatum:

I think you are far too intelligent for this thread. Some want to think the wife was insane and acted without provocation when the brother-in-law who opened the thread was obviously economical with the truth.

Op, please, don't marry so you are your siblings can enjoy your house and pot of soup in peace.

They just want to believe that she hates her husband's family just like they believe most wives do. They don't care to find out the root of the matter. How these wives are treated by their husband's family.

Someone on this thread was already planning how he will make life difficult for his brother's future wife. That is someone that plans to be jobless in future to have time to make another human's life difficult.

ImaIma1:


Sweetheart relax. Stop getting worked up. Whether you think it is an intelligent question or not, it happened.

And it happened that the wife who just had a cesarean was the one climbing bikes to the market and cooking for her husband's mother and younger sisters till they left.

When the wife now has her second child and insists that she wants her own family, someone that doesn't have sense will say she doesn't like her husband's family.

I am not someone who is partial or does eye service. I will pick who makes my life easier over who makes it harder. And I will have my strong reasons and evidence before doing so in such a way that even the dumbest person will understand and agree.

Whatever choice you want to make that you and your man business.....As for me whatever reason that makes my family not to have free access to my house yours too can't come period.

You can't tolerate mine ....I can't tolerate yours.

in between only a wicked woman will support a wife throwing is husband brother out....no matter what she has no right to do that.....she only trying to bring hatred btw them.

ImaIma1:


They just want to believe that she hates her husband's family just like they believe most wives do. They don't care to find out the root of the matter. How these wives are treated by their husband's family.

Someone on this thread was already planning how he will make life difficult for his brother's future wife. That is someone that plans to be jobless in future to have time to make another human's life difficult.

abi ooo.....is only the husband family that are always wicked, the wife family are always nice.

Like the wife family don't put there burden on the man too.....you are just biased.

Men tolerate there in law alot that why we hardly complain.

Gone through some of the comments and I will say that some of the women are more realistic than some of the men, by the way, different people different opinion because of different experiences.. I would like people to look at it from the aspect of them not married but in their own parents house and one so called aunty or uncle will come and lord over your Mum all in the name of being your father's brother or sister or an aunty or uncle lording over you in your father's house all in the name of being your mum's brother or sister.. Reason am that way, so whatever your answers are should be your sincere opinion.. Again I say different opinions due to different experiences will sway our decisions..

ImaIma1:


Sweetheart relax. Stop getting worked up. Whether you think it is an intelligent question or not, it happened.

And it happened that the wife who just had a cesarean was the one climbing bikes to the market and cooking for her husband's mother and younger sisters till they left.

When the wife now has her second child and insists that she wants her own family, someone that doesn't have sense will say she doesn't like her husband's family.

I am not someone who is partial or does eye service. I will pick who makes my life easier over who makes it harder. And I will have my strong reasons and evidence before doing so in such a way that even the dumbest person will understand and agree.

.... Nonsense and ingredients.
First them never born that woman that will come between me and my family.

You ve narrated this incident before and I remember telling you that such can only happen where the husband is weak.
I also remembered telling you that in Omugwo,it's the wife's mother or siblings that usually comes to help out and take care of the breastfeeding mum.
No matter who comes for Omugwo, that person is there to work . Blame the man of the house.
As for the thread. If my wife tries such rubbish without waiting for me to come back first,then she also will have to leave. If she can be quick to anger,I also can be quick to anger.
When everybodies head is cleared,then we all can come together and discuss.

Godoverevery:

abi ooo.....is only the husband that are wicked, the wife family are always nice.

Like the wife family don't put there burden on the man too.....you are just biased.

Men tolerate there in law alot that why we hardly complain.

For things like omugwo especially where the wife will needs care, her family is preferable. My pastor once pointed this out in church because it seemed to be an issue in marriages.

There are definitely good inlaws and my eldest sister and many others I know are blessed to have them.

But husbands should be truthful when they know they have troublesome family members and protect their wives from them.

My husband knows his family and tries to shield me from them thankfully. All I have to do is be silent.

Right now you are still speaking from an aggrieved brother's point of view. When you have your own wife, you will understand better. Shalom.

JONNYSPUTE:
.... Nonsense and ingredients.
First them never born that woman that will come between me and my family.

You ve narrated this incident before and I remember telling you that such can only happen where the husband is weak.
I also remembered telling you that in Omugwo,it's the wife's mother or siblings that usually comes to help out and take care of the breastfeeding mum.
No matter who comes for Omugwo, that person is there to work . Blame the man of the house.
As for the thread. If my wife tries such rubbish without waiting for me to come back first,then she also will have to leave. If she can be quick to anger,I also can be quick to anger.
When everybodies head is cleared,then we all can come together and discuss.

And I remember telling you that my husband wasn't always home and I was not the reporting type or try to cause division.The times he was around, he scolded them; something I would not dare.

And in a case where the wife's mum is late and mum inlaw is alive, it's common sense to want her around especially when there were initial issues.

Obviously, the op who said he was chased out only narrated the part that favoured him.

Godoverevery:


Whatever choice you want to make that you and your man business.....As for me whatever reason that makes my family not to have free access to my house yours too can't come period.

You can't tolerate mine ....I can't tolerate yours.

in between only a wicked woman will support a wife throwing is husband brother out....no matter what she has no right to do that.....she only trying to bring hatred btw them.

If only we had the full story. Only a wicked inlaw will make life difficult for a wife in her own home.

LadySarah:
When I read the thread I SMH and moved on, no comment. I have experienced that just bcoz I slept over at my bros house on emergency after arriving the city late cos of traffic.The wife was talking rubbish that I came without informing them.This is someone that has had holidays in my home for up-to a week. I left and went for the conference I came for.Almost all her 5 siblings have lived there at one point orthe other and the day I was leaving the sister brought 3 of her kids for hols. l learnt they stayed for a month .Imagine if it was from the husbands side.

more than a year now, my legs hasn't neared it.I have my own home which gives me peace. I'm still the one who invites my own in-laws.last yr she was talking about hols and I shut her up.Let her stay in her house let me stay on my own.

Useless things are what we bother about; my kitchen,my this and that.Nobody knows 2moro.There should have been other ways to settle the issue other than throwing him out unless he is challenging her.

Gbamsolutely...impressive..coming from a woman I find this piece really deceptive..

ImaIma1:


And I remember telling you that my husband wasn't always home and I was not the reporting type or try to cause division.The times he was around, he scolded them; something I would not dare.

And in a case where the wife's mum is late and mum inlaw is alive, it's common sense to want her around especially when there were initial issues.

Obviously, the op who said he was chased out only narrated the part that favoured him.

...And do you think it was right for to throw his things out without atleast discussing with her husband?

Don't you think it shows a sign of disregard and disrespect towards her husband?

I hope you remembered I said my wife attempted being wicked to my younger brother that came to stay with us before he traveled abroad and when I noticed,I barred all her relatives from coming to my house? Until they all came begging.

I blame the man of the house for such because he is not a man if his wife can do such in his absence.

cayorday89:
Gone through some of the comments and I will say that some of the women are more realistic than some of the men, by the way, different people different opinion because of different experiences.. I would like people to look at it from the aspect of them not married but in their own parents house and one so called aunty or uncle will come and lord over your Mum all in the name of being your father's brother or sister or an aunty or uncle lording over you in your father's house all in the name of being your mum's brother or sister.. Reason am that way, so whatever your answers are should be your sincere opinion.. Again I say different opinions due to different experiences will sway our decisions..

...
Funny. All these can only happen where a husband is not incharge of his household.

Godoverevery:
Someone posted a thread on how his brother wife threw is things out because he cooked for a friend who visited and everyone was telling him to find a way to leave the house, is wrong for him to enter her kitchen bla bla bla..

This my question if it was her siblings that did the same would she throw his things out??

Most women are just wicked ,self centered and greed ....this happens in most home... women don't want there in-law visiting is only there people that are welcome.....they want to control the home.
Kitchen is only an issue when the in-law enter to pick anything but if is there own relative you won't hear anything.
My own older brother wife did same to our last born ....she always complaining anytime she visit for few days but her own bro/sis will visit for months without any complain.....my sis haven't step his house for like 3yrs now because of that issh.

Let always speak the truth when we give advise instead of being economical with the truth.....it wasn't because the guy cooked for his friend she threw is things out ....is just wickedness of most women... they don't want to see there in-laws....they want to cut the husband family off for there selfish reasons but if anything happens is still the same people they run to.
This things happens alot and very annoying..... Only a foolish man take such rubbish from is wife....
YOU THROW MY SIBLINGS THINGS OUT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION YOU ARE GOING TO YOUR PARENT HOUSE.

Note :
I can never choose my wife over my family neither can I choose my family over my wife.

No wife can make me misbehave to my family....no family can make me misbehave to my wife.

....I love this.

ImaIma1:


If only we had the full story. Only a wicked inlaw will make life difficult for a wife in her own home.

I hope you do same to your own brother if he makes life difficult for you...lol

wicked people will never do such to there own even he/she did worst.

JONNYSPUTE:
...
Funny. All these can only happen where a husband is not incharge of his household.

Reason why I said, different experiences, different opinion, in my own father's house, no extended family members come to stay for weeks not to talk of a month,is it that my father was in charge, or we have reasonable extended members who naturally know when to stay put in their respective homes, we never can tell.. My point is, you being in charge does not guarantee that things will go the way you want it not because you were not capable but because so many factors can make things go awry at any point in time...

...I keep saying it. Most men of this generation are so weak,stupid,pussy ass fools,lazy and not worthy to be called men.

No be mouth. I have once told my wife and my in-laws that I'm living for my kids and not her.

I will not fail in my duties and responsibilities as her husband but if she thinks I can't throw her out of the house let her misbehave and see my reactions.

Infact that was the day she knew the kind of man she has as a husband.

I'm a very kind,gentle and loving husband but no so called wife can take advantage of that.

Even in marriage,there are boundaries.

cayorday89:

Reason why I said, different experiences, different opinion, in my own father's house, no extended family members come to stay for weeks not to talk of a month,is it that my father was in charge, or we have reasonable extended members who naturally know when to stay put in their respective homes, we never can tell.. My point is, you being in charge does not guarantee that things will go the way you want it not because you were not capable but because so many factors can make things go awry at any point in time...

...Your Dad knows exactly what e was doing.
Did you ever asked him why he made it mandatory that non should stay more than a week when he or she visits?

JONNYSPUTE:
...And do you think it was right for to throw his things out without atleast discussing with her husband?

Don't you think it shows a sign of disregard and disrespect towards her husband?

I hope you remembered I said my wife attempted being wicked to my younger brother that came to stay with us before he traveled abroad and when I noticed,I barred all her relatives from coming to my house? Until they all came begging.

I blame the man of the house for such because he is not a man if his wife can do such in his absence.

She was irrational and should have discussed whatever issues with her husband and allow him react.

Living in peace is important. There was a time I stayed with my sister to help out and her husband's sister was also staying. You won't know who was who. Whatever she did for me, she did for her too.

My sister didn't enter their family with wahala and they too treated her like an extra sister. The problem is where a wife is not warm and hospitable or the husband's family has animosity towards her. There will be issues.

As for me, I just do my part and leave what I can't handle to God. And God always exposes any injustice against me. One day we will all come to relate together like one family.

ImaIma1:


She was irrational and should have discussed whatever issues with her husband and allow him react.

Living in peace is important. There was a time I stayed with my sister to help out and her husband's sister was also staying. You won't know who was who. Whatever she did for me, she did for her too.

My sister didn't enter their family with wahala and they too treated her like an extra sister. The problem is where a wife is not warm and hospitable or the husband's family has animosity towards her. There will be issues.

As for me, I just do my part and leave what I can't handle to God. And God always exposes any injustice against me. One day we will all come to relate together like one family.

....I concur. Like I used to say. If we all know and understand our boundaries,there wouldn't be problems in the family.

JONNYSPUTE:
...Your Dad knows exactly what e was doing.
Did you ever asked him why he made it mandatory that non should stay more than a week when he or she visits?

You know why I never asked, we hardly stayed beyond our welcome in other extended family houses also, and a very large one at that.. It's more or less, everyone knew what was expected of them and those that came or when we visited we knew our boundaries, I no fit go person house go dey drag remote, but can you say that of other families, reason why I said, different experiences bring about different opinions, you don't expect someone with a caring sister-in-law to reason like someone who had a nasty sister-in-law, or so in the case of all kinds of in-laws whether good or bad.. As for me I will treat like an isolated case if I get married and let everyone know their stand to avoid issues and I no get brother na sisters I get and I know what they are capable of and they are not children to come and be fighting in my house, we love our spaces and chances of fights happening can be slim... So I ask what is your own experience?

Godoverevery:

I hope you do same to your own brother if he makes life difficult for you...lol

wicked people will never do such to there own even he/she did worst.

Hahahaha...for one, I don't have any younger ones. My husband even talks more with my brothers than I do.

All my siblings even if they are older than my husband respect him and they hardly visit.

Everyone is busy with their lives to have time to chook nose in another person's business. They only know what we want them to know.

May God provide for us all and keep us busy so that we don't have time to trouble another person.

JONNYSPUTE:
....I concur. Like I used to say. If we all know and understand our boundaries,there wouldn't be problems in the family.

Keyword...boundaries.

It is not easy for man's family to accept boundaries because of someone they feel has come to reap where she didn't sow.

This is always the issue with some men's families. And some wifes come with the intention of alienating their husband from his family.

God help us all o.

cayorday89:

You know why I never asked, we hardly stayed beyond our welcome in other extended family houses also, and a very large one at that.. It's more or less, everyone knew what was expected of them and those that came or when we visited we knew our boundaries, I no fit go person house go dey drag remote, but can you say that of other families, reason why I said, different experiences bring about different opinions, you don't expect someone with a caring sister-in-law to reason like someone who had a nasty sister-in-law, or so in the case of all kinds of in-laws whether good or bad.. As for me I will treat like an isolated case if I get married and let everyone know their stand to avoid issues and I no get brother na sisters I get and I know what they are capable of and they are not children to come and be fighting in my house, we love our spaces and chances of fights happening can be slim... So I ask what is your own experience?

....Nice but you will also agree with me that you people learnt about respecting boundaries from some one? Might be Ur Dad.

I have never stayed with with any of my relatives or in-laws reason is that I'm the first in my family.

When I got married,I never had a problem with my in-laws coming to stay with me or their sister and never saw it as anything.And thank God I came from a family where we all learnt to keep and respect boundaries.

That was the reason why I had to take such actions by stopping all my wife's relatives from visiting immediately I noticed her behaviour towards my younger brother who came for a short stay.

Imagine my anger because her relatives were practically living in my house and she condones all their excesses but she could not act the same way to my brother?

I didn't even discuss anything with her but gave my instructions and asked all to leave.

When they keep asking her why I acted such,she couldn't answer because she knew She was the cause.

ImaIma1:


Keyword...boundaries.

It is not easy for man's family to accept boundaries because of someone they feel has come to reap where she didn't sow.

This is always the issue with some men's families. And some wifes come with the intention of alienating their husband from his family.

God help us all o.

....And this is why most of the time I bash men who can't take control of things in their homes.

If you re my relative and you visit my house,I will immediately put you on the know and remind you that no matter what,you shouldn't exceed nor cross your boundaries. Same way I will put my wife on the know.