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FamilyWhen I Became A Mother, Feminism Let Me Down by saturnjay(op): 10:22am On Feb 23, 2017
I am a feminist. I believe women should have equal opportunities to men. I acknowledge that they often do not. (Yes, even now.)

I am also a mother, and when it it came to preparing for motherhood, feminism let me down.

From the beginning, we tell young girls they can do anything they want to do, they can be anyone they want to be. They are given access to great education, encouraged to further their studies and attain higher degrees. We push them to push themselves, to break boundaries, to achieve what seems impossible, to break through corporate glass ceilings and professional roadblocks.

We tell them they can have it all. And they can until they have a baby.

In the fight to ensure equality, as we preach to girls that they can -- and should -- do anything a boy can do, we are failing to prepare women for one of the greatest challenges so many of them will face; motherhood. We are teaching our young people that there is no value in motherhood and that homemaking is an outdated, misogynistic concept. We do this through the promotion of professional progression as a marker of success, while completely devaluing the contribution of parents in the home.

We then wonder why, when these girls become women who turn into mothers, they suffer from depression, anxiety and struggle to find a sense of self or identity. Are we truly helping women get ahead, or are we instead setting them up for a future of self doubt and a sense of failure?


We are functioning in a society that pretends women don't grow up to become mothers. We are so driven by the focus that women can do the same and be the same as men, that we completely fail to provide them with education or understanding of what may be ahead for them, as future homemakers and those who raise children. How can we ensure equality for all women, when we place so little value on the role of the mother?

Mums need the sisterhood more than ever. We need feminism. But we need it from the beginning.

We need to be telling our young people that raising children is an incredibly important part of the fabric of our society and we need to be giving them the skills to be doing that well.

We need to be validating the role of the mother and highlighting the work that goes into it, instead of perpetuating the myth that the work that takes place in the home is 'less than' -- less meaningful, less valuable, less important.

We need to teach young people the skills they need to succeed -- not only in the workforce, but in the home as well. We need to teach them how to care for children, how to cook, how to clean and organise, how to manage household budgets and administration.

We need to view and offer this as just as an important career option as any other; because for many women, the ones who, for whatever reason, do not return to the workforce and instead stay home to raise their children, this does become their career.

Young men need to understand the value of this role as well. They need to be shown that a homemaker -- male or female -- provides an essential contribution to society. They, too, need to be given the option to become the primary caretaker. We need to ensure that we lift up the value and recognition of this role to the point where it is just as viable an ambition as any other career prospect.

The men of our society, when not performing the role of stay-at-home parent themselves (as so often is the case) need to be taught to see the worth of the parent who stays home. There needs to be a change within our society in how we speak to and about homemakers. If our only marker of success is what you do in the workplace, how can we ever achieve that degree of equality?

We need to stop acting as though when we provide women with these traditional skills, we are taking away their power.
The reality of our society cannot be ignored.

For many women, their journey will naturally lead them to a period of stay in the home, caring for children. Whether that time is only a few months, or for several decades, they need to be prepared. They need to be given the skills they need to succeed and they need to be taught that their work is valuable.

We need to stop acting as though when we provide women with these traditional skills, we are taking away their power. Teaching women to care for children and a home empowers them. It prepares them for a path that may lie ahead. What really takes away their power, is telling them that doing so is worthless.

Feminism, it's time to catch up. Our women deserve better.

Let's tell them they can be anything they want -- including a Mum, and let's start telling them just how important that is.


http://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/samantha-johnson/when-i-became-a-mother-feminism-let-me-down/
EventsRe: Bride Wears Boobs-Popping Wedding Gown: Is This Fashion Or Madness? by saturnjay(m): 3:23pm On Aug 17, 2016
when you married a prostitute as wife...oloshos
EducationRe: Bad Things You Did In Secondary School? by saturnjay(m): 1:45am On Aug 11, 2016
pado1:
I straffed my married chemistry teacher.
What is her name?
EducationRe: Mention One Crazy Thing You Did In Secondary School by saturnjay(m): 1:05am On Aug 11, 2016
Stole school chicken, killed it, boiled it and ate it with my gang
FamilyRe: See Viral Photos Of A Woman And Her Daughter That Will Blow Your Mind. by saturnjay(m): 1:54pm On Aug 10, 2016
who this post epp?
PoliticsRe: Forgery Trial : Ekweremadu Writes US Congress, EU Parliament, Others by saturnjay(m): 2:11am On Jun 29, 2016
Who letter epp
PoliticsRe: Asawana Deadly Force Of Niger Delta Emerges, Demands Sovereign State by saturnjay(m): 11:32am On Jun 24, 2016
My former landlord was an ijaw, I am Yoruba, I once asked him why the such much hatred for ibos but he couldn't respond, I have never seen anyone that hated ibos more than the man, he is a Niger delta man. For IPOB to think the Niger deltans love them, they need to re-examine that, the Niger delta's hate for ibos is so much, they can never follow them to form biafra
PoliticsRe: US Cancels Three Reps’ Visas Over Sex Scandal, Dogara Orders Probe by saturnjay(m): 11:17am On Jun 17, 2016
They were ten of them, why was only three accused of sexual harassment, it is a felony in US to solicit for sex, it is a felony in US to pay for sex, these guys messed up, they are bunch of animals, they were left alone because they came in as diplomat, otherwise they will be in jail right now. The worst has been done, to cancel their visas, the other he-goat bragging he is going to sue US government should go ahead, they can even trick him to come for defense and if found guilty he will rot in jail. We have criminals as law makers and with these breeds of guys we are heading nowhere in Nigeria.
CareerRe: Foreign Airlines To Sack 2000 Workers: Union Kicks Against Plans by saturnjay(m): 2:31pm On Mar 23, 2016
luvinhubby:
So the airlines should retain their workers amidst dwindling revenue caused by Buhari's clueless economic policies?

I sympathise with the affected workers but the airlines are not to be blamed.
The dwindling revenue is caused by the oil price crash, it has nothing to do with Buhari policies, his policies was to tighten and prevent capital loss upon the dwindling revenue caused by oil crash, Russia and Saudi Arabia are feeling the heat more than us, Saudis lost over $300 Billion because of the oil crash, so save your insult for Buhari
PoliticsRe-run: Wike Declares Thursday, Friday Work-free Days In Rivers by saturnjay(op): 7:39am On Mar 17, 2016
Port Harcourt – Gov. Nyesom Wike of Rivers, has declared Thursday, March 17 and Friday, March 18, as work-free days for the re-run legislative elections in the state. The Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) will conduct elections for 22 of the 32 state House of Assembly seats, 12 of the 13 House of Representatives seats and the three Senatorial Districts on March 19. The governor, who made the announcement in a state-wide broadcast on Wednesday in Port Harcourt, said the work-free days would enable workers in the public and private sectors participate in the elections. “Consequently, all public and private offices, including banks must remain closed for the duration of the holidays,” he said. He urged the people to cast their ballots for candidates that would stand for their rights and promote their collective interests in the National Assembly. “You will also be electing worthy representatives to the State House of Assembly to join me to deliver our developmental agenda and help chart the future of our state through effective legislation and oversight,” he said. Wike said that the state government had requested the armed forces to increase security surveillance in nine local government areas identified as flash points of cultism and banditry. He said that the LGAs are: Abua/Odual, Ahoada-East, Ahoada-West, Emohua, Ikwerre, Opobo/Nkoro and Ogba/Egbema/Ndoni. He said that the security agencies had assured that they would not deviate from their role of safeguarding law and order before, during and after the elections. “The Nigeria Police and other security agencies have put adequate measures to keep the peace and ensure an orderly conduct of the re-run elections throughout the state,” he said.

Read more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/03/re-run-wike-declares-thursdayfriday-work-free-days/
PoliticsBREAKING: Face Your CCT Trial, Supreme Court Tells Saraki by saturnjay(op): 11:13am On Feb 05, 2016
The Supreme Court has dismissed an appeal by the Senate President, Bukola Saraki, challenging the validity of his trial on charges of assets declaration preferred against him at the Code of Conduct Tribunal.


A seven-man panel of the apex court presided over by the Chief Justice of Nigeria, Justice Mahmud Mohammed, unanimously ruled on Friday that Saraki’s appeal against the jurisdiction of the trial and competence of the charges, lacked merit.


Justice Wallter Onnoghen, who read the lead judgment, held that contrary to Saraki’s contention, the Danladi Umar-led Code of Conduct Tribunal was validly constituted by two members.


Justice Onnoghen also held that the tribunal was by the provisions of its enabling laws and the Constitution conferred with the quasi-criminal jurisdiction and thus could validly issue bench warrant.


He thus held that the Administration of Criminal Justice Act 2015 was applicable to the proceedings of the tribunal.


He dismissed the allegation by Saraki that he was not properly served with the charges and also held that the charges filed before the CCT before the appointment of the Attorney-General of the Federation were valid.


He also noted that there was an attempt by Saraki to intimidate the ‎CCT by claiming that it disobeyed the order of a Federal High Court barring it from continuing with the proceedings pending the determination a suit filed by the Senate President to challenge the trial.


“I have looked at the records, there is no where such orders was made,” Justice Onnoghen ruled.


The CJN and other Justices on the panel agreed with the judgment.


The rest of the panel members who consented are Justices Tanko Muhammad, Sylvester Ngwuta, Kudirat Kekere-Ekun, Chima Nweze and Amiru Sanusi.


After the judgment on Friday, an army of political associates, who attended the proceedings walked out of the court quietly.


Following the Supreme Court judgment it is expected that the CCT will soon issue hearing notice for the continuation of the Senate President’s trial on three counts of false assets declaration.
PoliticsDonald Trump Sends Chilling Warning To Nigerians In The Us by saturnjay(op): 10:37am On Jan 17, 2016
“IF I WIN, YOU ALL LEAVE”

American Billionaire and Republican Presidential Front-runner, Donald Trump, has shot a subtle warning to the Nigerian Community in the United States, after he said all Nigerians would be made to leave the country “when he becomes President”.

He made the “threat” during a rally at Wichita, Kansas. According to Donald Trump, Nigerians ad Mexicans have taken all the jobs meant for honest hard working Americans.

“To Make America great again, we need to get rid of the Muslims, Mexicans and the Africans, especially the Nigerians. They take all our jobs, jobs meant for honest hard working Americans, and when we don’t give them the jobs, the Muslims blow us up”, Trump said.

“We need to get the Africans out. Not the blacks, the Africans. Especially the Nigerians. They’re everywhere. I went for a rally in Alaska and met just one African in the entire state. Where was he from? Nigeria! He’s in Alaska taking our jobs. They’re in Houston taking our jobs. Why can’t they stay in their own country? Why? I’ll tell you why. Because they are corrupt. Their Governments are so corrupt, they rob the people blind and bring it all here to spend. And their people run away and come down here and take our jobs! We can’t have that! If I become president, we’ll send them all home. We’ll build a wall at the Atlantic Shore. Then maybe we’ll re-colonize them because obviously they did not learn a damn thing from the British!”

His speech was met with raucous applause by the 10,000 strong predominantly Caucasian audience. What this portends for Nigeria in the event of the Trump victory is still unclear, but the Nigerian Ambassador to the US has so far allayed fears of all Nigerians living in the USA, although we gather he has secretly packed his bags and is set to move to Mexico or Canada if Trump becomes President.

I hope our American cousins have made adequate plans back home…..


http://baronessj.com/2016/01/16/donald-trump-sends-chilling-warning-to-nigerians-in-the-us/
RomanceRe: 13-year-old Who Impregnated Mary Kay Letourneau, His 35-year-old Teacher by saturnjay(op): 11:36am On Jan 05, 2016
Romance13-year-old Who Impregnated Mary Kay Letourneau, His 35-year-old Teacher by saturnjay(op):
It was a scandal that rocked the nation. A 35-year-old teacher was dating her 13 year-old student. I remember it like it was yesterday though it was nearly 20 years ago. So when I heard that Barbara Walters was doing a follow-up special on TV I had to break out the homemade popcorn with extra cheese. What? To think that they’re still together, and after all these years! It got me wondering if maybe the bulk of us got it wrong and instead of this kid being a victim who lost his childhood to this deranged teacher, it’s actually a love story in disguise…

First of all, I discover some interesting facts that I never really knew, or had forgotten. Like the fact that Mary Kay Letourneau was already married with four kids when she got pregnant by 13-year-old Vili Fualaau. It was then that the scandal broke, her marriage ended, and she was sent to prison for a few months under the condition that she would stop seeing Vili. However, not a month after her release, she was arrested a second time. Mama just couldn’t stay away from the kid. This time, the judge was infuriated and sentenced her to the full seven years that she should have gotten the first time around. But it didn’t end there, she was already pregnant with Vili’s second child, which she gave birth to in prison. By the time she was released in 2004, Vili was over 18-years-old so they were able to resume their relationship and married in 2005. Today, they live in the same Seattle town with their two daughters who are now 16 and 17 years old. Talk about drama!

I’m listening to this re-cap and it’s hard for me not to think, poor kid. He came from a broken home, and here’s this beautiful teacher–he said she looked like a movie star–who is showing him more attention than he’s probably used to. Of course, he fell hard. Next thing you know he’s a father with two kids and she’s in prison. Of course, he waited for her to get out. Where was he going to go as a high school dropout with two kids? Plus, whenever people try to keep two lovers apart they become that much more determined to be together. Forbidden love tastes that much sweeter.

What pissed me off more than Mary Kay’s refusal to avoid this kid’s advances was her refusal to acknowledge that she’d done anything wrong. From lying to her former husband to dating a minor. She even admitted that she never expected jail time. I’m looking at this woman, like, Seriously? Did you think this was a romance novel?! Then I realize that it’s her sense of entitlement that’s freaking me out. Why shouldn’t she be able to have this broken Somoan kid if she wanted? It’s interesting because her story is eerily similar to that of her father who was a Congressman and college professor who had two children with his mistress, who just happened to be a former student? Mary Kay talks about her parent’s break up and ultimate reconciliation as if it’s the greatest love story told to man. So I’m looking at Vili like he never had a chance.

And then Barbara turns her attention to Vili. She wants to know how he’s dealt with dropping out of school, his brushes with the law, alcoholism and depression.

He says for years the situation left him traumatized. “If you’re going to call someone a victim make sure that that victim is getting all the help they want and need. There was no real guidance or help on how to figure this out.”

There was also a feeling of hopelessness around wanting to express himself and be understood, but not being able to do that because of his lack of education. Today, when he starts feeling sad about this part of his life he chooses to focus on the beauty that came from it and where he can take that.

When asked how he’d feel if one of his own daughters wanted to date a teacher he says he wouldn’t encourage it because you don’t know what you want at that age.

I start rethinking this idea of Vili as a victim. Yes, his life hasn’t been easy, but he seems incredibly self-aware and appears to be a solid father and husband. His daughters know how their parents met and appear to be very well adjusted. He’s a DJ and Mary Kay is a legal assistant. They’re still together when half of all marriages end in divorce. They still live in the same Seattle town so nobody ran or is hiding. Is he a victim? He doesn’t see himself that way. Perhaps he never bought into that label or shunned it once he realized that victims really don’t get no help.

He told Barbara he was able to deal with his depression when he decided that his problems weren’t going to go away by sitting around.

It got me thinking, why am I seeing him as a victim? Does it make me feel good to have someone else to pity? Poor Vili, stuck with the woman he fell in love with at 12-years-old. Even he says he feels ‘happy’ and ‘safe.’ Obviously, it’s enough for him so it’s got to be enough for me. Given everything, I’m going to mind my own business and wish him and his family a nice life.
FamilyRe: Man Seeks Divorce Over Wife’s Sexual Escapades On Social Media by saturnjay(m): 1:10pm On Sep 14, 2015
IDOWU ILEMOBAYO GRATOME, you destroyed someone marriage and you want to have yours...karma is waiting

FamilyRe: Man Seeks Divorce Over Wife’s Sexual Escapades On Social Media by saturnjay(m): 1:05pm On Sep 14, 2015
See the bastard...karma is waiting for him

PoliticsRe: Court-stops-jonathan-from-relocating-500m-oil-project by saturnjay(m): 1:09pm On May 16, 2015
The project is a private initiative that enticed government and the owners cited it in Lagos, what is the big deal about that. Nigeria Content Development keyed into it to promote local content, GEJ is ill - advised on it, his aides takes joy in perpetually embarrassing GEJ on most of his decisions. I pity him.
RomanceRe: A Guy I Like Seems To Be Ignoring Me. by saturnjay(m): 12:04pm On Oct 23, 2014
msrita. I can tell you that he knows you like him and he likes you too. You need to detach yourself from the most wanted guy and go solo or move with girls only for now. He doesn't want to get turned off when he comes to you or he doesn't want to chase another guy's girl. Be smart about it and he would come for you when found out you on your own.
PoliticsRe: "Boko-Haram Sect Are Resilient Warriors" - JTF Personnel by saturnjay(m): 8:23pm On Mar 19, 2013
Guerrilla war and insurgency has never been won. Look at Iraq, Afghanistan, Palestine-Israel etc. It lingers for years, these are not after money but pursuing an ideological doctrine. They will fight our soldiers as if they are ready to die but kill as many as possible. Mind you no soldiers want to die, he has wife and children, but these boko haram has none even if he has, the wife is even supporting him to keep fighting. Look at the two scenarios. It will get to a time our soldiers will be running away from confronting them, it is a case of somebody going to war to fight, kill and die and the other going to war to kill and return home. They are not equal!!!
PoliticsRe: "Boko-Haram Sect Are Resilient Warriors" - JTF Personnel by saturnjay(m): 8:14pm On Mar 19, 2013
These guys are infused with the spirit of Jihad, it is a spirit that makes you to love death more than life, makes you fearless of any being and keeps you fighting. They are not motivated by money nor power but the ideology of crushing their enemies. The Sultan of Sokoto understands these, likewise every Muslims. These guys will not stop until their mission is achieved. It is better FG call them to talk, they are not faceless nor are they spirit. These guys will keep fighting until they are no more, they are resilience can be compared to Alqaeda fighters. FGN should grant them amnesty.
FamilyRe: My Husband Spits On My Face During Quarrels by saturnjay(m): 10:31pm On Dec 30, 2012
I AM MARRIED WITH THREE KIDS. It is not normal for a man to do that but i will encourage you to communicate with him, talk with him to stop it if he loves you, advise him what to do when he is angry. Tell him to make a positional change if he is annoyed, if he is annoyed while standing tell him to sit down or vice versa. Tell him to drink water to calm him down when he is annoyed and i am sure he would stop spitting on you with this behavioral counter measures against spitting. take care. I wish you well.
AutosDana: Air Crash Reports Doctored – Ex Aviation Minister by saturnjay(op): 8:13am On Jun 10, 2012
Dana: Air crash reports doctored – Ex Aviation Minister
On June 10, 2012 · In News
12:30 am
Email1

Amid the moves by the Federal Government to launch investigations into last Sunday’s plane crash in Lagos that claimed over 160 lives, Sunday Vanguard can reveal why reports of past air crash investigations in Nigeria were never made public.

The Federal Government, according to top placed sources, failed to make public the reports because, in some instances, the local versions contradicted the versions prepared by the National Transportation and Safety Board (NTSB) of the US, renowned for air crash investigations across the world. The situation thus puts the government in a quandary.

A former Aviation Minister, Chief Femi Fani-Kayode corroborated this when he told Sunday Vanguard, last week, that the contents and information retrieved from the black boxes of crashed planes in the country were kept away by some interests “in an attempt to manipulate the reports”.

Fani-Kayode said: “I must tell you that in practice what has happened since 2005 is that the contents of and information in the black boxes of the various planes that crashed have either been kept away from the Nigerian public or the black box itself has just disappeared or been stolen. The result is that no one really gets to know the truth about what really happened regarding these crashes except for those in the corridors of power at the Ministry of Aviation.

“Let me tell you what happened in the past. This is done in an attempt to hide that truth and manipulate the report. I sincerely hope that this does not happen in this case. I am also hoping that the government will allow the American National Transportation Safety Board, NTSB which is the agency that is charged to investigate all air crashes all over the world, a free reign and a free hand to do its job to help in establishing what really happened”.
CelebritiesRe: Nollywood Actor Ayo Badmus Badly Beaten By Political Thugs by saturnjay(m): 5:41am On Nov 14, 2011
The Chairman of Oshodi/Isolo LGA is my very good friend, we both went to LASPOTECH together in the 90's, i even know the supposed brother, i never knew them to be like this, there are two sides to a coin, he needs to be heard. I will call him and ask him on this issue and caution him to thread carefully to save his political career.
This can be resolved amicably and i hope Ayo too take it easy.
RomanceRe: Crush On Mom's Bestfriend by saturnjay(m): 10:56pm On Aug 25, 2011
you are possessed! pervert, how could that be in your head, your mom's friend!!!, there are billions of girls out there for you to meet, try it and incur the wrath of your mom forever, silly boy
Christianity EtcRamadan: I Don’t Fast, Will I Be Punished? by saturnjay(op): 10:59am On Aug 13, 2010
Ramadan: I don’t fast, will I be punished?
By Abdulfatah Oladeinde
Friday, August 13, 2010
• The National Amir of Islamic Knowledge and Enlightenment Centre, Mallam AbdulRazaq Shiss (left) delivering his speech at the pre-Ramadan lecture of the society. With him are the Chief Imam of Ike-Oluwa Mujaheed-deen Central Mosque, Papa Ashafa, Lagos Imam Mustapha Adams and Sheikh AbdulAzeez Baba Kuta.
PHOTO: Sun News Publishing

More Sunlight of Islam Stories

I do not fast. Will I be punished on the Day of Resurrection? Fasting in Ramadan is one of the pillars on which Islam is built. Allah tells us that He has prescribed it for the believers of this ummah [nation], as He prescribed it for those who came before them.
Al-Bukhaari (cool and Muslim (16) narrated that Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Islam is built on five (pillars): the testimony that there is no god but Allah and Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah; establishing prayer; paying zakah; Hajj; and fasting Ramadan.”

Whoever does not fast has abandoned one of the pillars of Islam, and is committing a major sin. Indeed some of the pious believers were of the view that he is a kaafir [disbeliever] and apostate – we seek refuge with Allah from that.

Whoever does not fast in Ramadan without being sick or having any other excuse that allows him not to fast is more evil than the adulterer or drunkard, indeed they doubted his Islam and thought that this was heresy.

The brother who asked this question is advised to fear Allah and to beware of His wrath, vengeance and a painful punishment. He should hasten to repent to Allah before the destroyer of pleasures that splits people apart [i.e., death] takes him unawares. Today there is action and no reckoning, but tomorrow there will be the reckoning and no action. Note that whoever repents, Allah will accept his repentance, and whoever draws closer to Allah one hand span, Allah will draw closer to him one cubit. For Allah is Most Generous, Forbearing and Most Merciful.

If you try fasting and find out how easy it is and what comfort it brings and how close it brings you to Allah, you will never give it up. Think about what Allah says at the end of the verses on fasting: “Allah intends for you ease, and He does not want to make things difficult for you”[al-Baqarah 2:185]

The phrase, “so that you may be grateful to Him” shows that fasting is a blessing for which we must give thanks. Hence some of the pious wished that the whole year was Ramadan. We ask Allah to help you and guide you, and to open your heart to that which will bring you happiness in this world and in the Hereafter.
My question is complex. First, during the first Ramadan that my wife and I were married, we did something that we are ashamed of and have sincerely repented for; and that is having intercourse while fasting. Unfortunately, this occurred two or three times.

I have come to know that the correct action for this is to: first free a slave or second, fast for 60 days continuously. The first option of freeing a slave is not possible, so my question is about fasting.
I could fast for 60 days but since it is continuous, I believe that I would not be able to provide for my family (fasting weakens me, and my job is a physical one. Without energy, it becomes unbelievably difficult). It is hard enough to make it through Ramadan and earn enough money (with Allah’s will) to provide for my family. What options are left to me.

I am aware of the Hadith where a poor man came to the prophet and he was given the options free a slave, fast, and he couldn’t do either, so he was given dates to give to the poorest family, which was his, so he took them to his family. How does this apply to me? I alhamdulillah, am not rich, but am not poor either. My wife and I feel tremendous guilt about this. Please help! Also, if one is to fast, is the 60-day for each time one had intercourse during the daytime in Ramadan?

Praise be to Allah. Our advice is that you should try to fast the two consecutive months during cold days when the days will be shorter and it will be less difficult for you, or during the annual leave which your employer gives you, and other opportunities which you can make use of for this purpose. If you really and truly cannot fast, then it is permissible for you to feed 60 poor persons. You could give them food in stages – according to what you are able to do – until you have fed the complete number.

Your wife also has to make a similar expiation if she was a willing partner in the act of intercourse during the day in Ramadan. If the number of times that intercourse took place happened on different days, then you have to offer expiation for each day on which the sanctity of the sacred month was broken. The author of Kifaayat al-Taalib said: “The number of expiations corresponds to the number of days, not to the number of times the act was repeated on one day before the payment of any expiation.

This is by consensus (of the scholars).” It was said in Haashiyat al-Dasooqi: “It is not counted by the number of times a person ate or had intercourse in one day.” The author of Mughni al-Muhtaaj said: “Expiation is counted by the number of misdeeds… (whoever had intercourse on two different days must pay expiation twice)… because each day is a separate, independent act of worship, so the expiation for both cannot be combined… If the act of intercourse happened several times in one day, the separate acts are not counted [i.e. one expiation is sufficient].”

Allah burdens not any person, but that which he can bear.
The Hadith to which you referred in your question was narrated by Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: “Whilst we were sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), a man came to him and said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, I am doomed!’ He said, ‘What happened to you?’ He said: ‘I had intercourse with my wife whilst I was fasting.’

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) asked: ‘Could you find a slave you could set free?’ He said, ‘No.’ He asked, ‘Are you able to fast for two consecutive months?’ He said, ‘No.’ He asked, ‘Can you feed 60 poor persons?’ He said, ‘No.’ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) fell silent. Whilst we were (sitting) like that, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was brought a container of dates.

He said, ‘Where is the one who was asking?’ The man said, ‘I (am here).’ He said, ‘Take these and give them in charity.’ The man said, ‘Who is poorer than I am, O Messenger of Allah? There is no household between the two lava fields (i.e., in Madinah) that is poorer than my household.’ The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) smiled until his back teeth could be seen, then he said: ‘Feed it to your family.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, Fath, 1936).

According to a report narrated by Ahmad from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her), whilst the Prophet was sitting in the shade of the fortress of Hassan, a man came to him and said, “I have been burnt, O Messenger of Allah!” He asked, “What is wrong with you?” He said, “I had intercourse with my wife whilst I was fasting.” She [‘Aa’ishah] said: that was in Ramadan. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said to him, “Sit down,” so he sat down at the back of the gathering.

Then a man came with a donkey on whose back was a basket of dates, and said: “This is my sadaqah (charity) O Messenger of Allah.” The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “Where is the burnt one who just came?” He said: “Here I am, O Messenger of Allah.” He said: “Take this and give it in charity.” He said, “Where should it go except to me and my family, O Messenger of Allah? By Him Who sent you with the truth, I cannot find anything for me and my family.” He said: “Take it.” So he took it. (al-Musnad 6/276).

We ask Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, to forgive us our sins and transgressions and to accept our repentance, for He is the Acceptor of Repentance, the Most Merciful.
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga)Nigerian Billionaire Aliko Dangote Is Reportedly Planning To Buy Arsenal Shares by saturnjay(op): 4:22pm On May 23, 2010
Nigerian billionaire Aliko Dangote is reportedly planning to enter the race to snap up the 16% stake of Arsenal's fourth largest shareholder Lady Nina Bracwell-Smith.

Aliko Dangote

Aliko Dangote (L) is the 261st richest person in the world

Dangote, one of Africa's richest men, is said to have registered his interest in the shareholding being sold by Bracewell-Smith, according to The Sunday Times.

The move could spark a takeover battle for the Gunners, with other contenders including its two biggest current investors - Stan Kroenke and Alisher Usmanov - who would be forced to launch a full takeover bid for the club if they secured the stake.

Mr Dangote is reportedly a passionate football fan and has the wealth to go head-to-head with sports entrepreneur Kroenke and Russian oligarch Usmanov.

The Nigerian industrialist has stood for the role of president of the Nigerian football association and is believed to have donated cash to the Nigerian national football team.

Mr Dangote founded manufacturing empire Dangote Group and was formerly head of the Nigerian stock exchange. He was named as the 261st richest person in the world on the 2009 Forbes rich list, with an estimated fortune of $2.5 billion.

Finance house Blackstone is now thought to have placed him on the shortlist to buy the Arsenal stake, with Lady Bracewell-Smith is said to be seeking £160 million for her stake after putting it on the sale block earlier this year.
IslamRe: A Beautiful Story About Qur'an by saturnjay(m): 7:38pm On May 08, 2010
Allah is the greatest
Christianity EtcRe: Ali Yakubov: 9 Month Old Russian Boy With Quran On Body by saturnjay(op): 6:37pm On Jan 21, 2010
Quote from: saturnjay on Today at 06:17:45 PM
Please see the difference, the writings on boy's body is bulged out, while the picture you are showing us has bulged out writings.

Do you even understand yourself?  Grin

I have corrected myself, it was a typographic error
corrected to: Please see the difference, the writings on boy's body is NOT bulged out, while the picture you are showing us has bulged out writings.
Christianity EtcRe: Ali Yakubov: 9 Month Old Russian Boy With Quran On Body by saturnjay(op): 6:20pm On Jan 21, 2010
Please see the difference, the writings on boy's body is not bulged out, while the picture you are showing us has bulged out writings. Doctor over there have confirmed that the boy was not stroked or robbed with anything for the writings to come but the writings come out fortnightly.
Please be objective by clicking on the video. Open your mind and know that it is beyond human handwork.
Clear?
Christianity EtcRe: Ali Yakubov: 9 Month Old Russian Boy With Quran On Body by saturnjay(op): 6:17pm On Jan 21, 2010
Please see the difference, the writings on boy's body is bulged out, while the picture you are showing us has bulged out writings. Doctor over there have confirmed that the boy was not stroked or robbed with anything for the writings to come but the writings come out fortnightly.
Please be objective by clicking on the video. Open your mind and know that it is beyond human handwork.
Clear?

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