₦airaland Forum

Gbadugbakun:
I'll choose Victor Agali, Bartholomew Ogbechi and Julius Agahowa.

Haynnie:
I recall my first time using a condom.
I was 19 and it was also my first time trying sex. There is this sweet girl that I've been crushing on since I moved into the area with my cousin. I'm a guy with good relationships with women, but I never wanted to date them because I wasn't ready at that time, not until I came across this beautiful girl.

Fast forward, to the times I became familiar with her and we became close friends. Not going to lie, I've fantasized laying with her, doing all the styles I've learnt from corn movies. I promise myself that when I next see her, I'll tell her how I feel and what I want with her.

During the week I texted her on WhatsApp and told her there's something I wanted to tell her and hope she doesn't mind. She replied “No, tell me.” So I confessed to her how I've been crushing on her and the way she's nice towards me.

I told her beauty was making my heart melt whenever I see her and I haven't felt this way in many months. I kept giving her the proper flow till she replied, “Are you serious? Why are you telling me now?”
I was confused about what she meant by her last line and I needed clarity. That was when she broke it to me that she recently got into a relationship with a guy from the next street and low-key she had been waiting for me to say my mind to her as she had been feeling me too but just wanted me to make the first move.

“Goodness me! Have I fumbled her already?” I said to myself but something made me continue the conversation with her. I told her that it is unfortunate that I didn't say earlier but I still find her attractive and we can still stay friends if she wants. She responded with, “That kind friend, hmm.” I don't want to decode her text as to what I already have in my mind; as in friends with benefits.

I just wrote okay and accepted I'm going to be left unread after that. Minutes later she wrote to me, asking when I would be available so that she could see me again. I told her I'll be free on the weekends, specifically Saturday. She responded, “Okay, get ready for me” inserting a devil emoji and a naughty one to it.

“Get ready for what??” I asked. She sent a once-view photo and a laughing emoji attached to it. I opened it, and it was a picture of a naked guy and a girl intimately involved in doggy sex. I could feel my member pulsating, reacting to the picture, my heart skipped a beat and I could hear how heavy it thumped in my chest.

I, who hasn't had sex once, am just a fraudulent bad boy showcasing Playboy antics but I haven't done adult stuff before. Here is me having another opportunity to sex and I'm not willing to turn this one down because it's my crush, I took my time responding to her text, asking when she would come around and what else she would want.

“Just get a drink and a pack of condoms” she said. In my mind, “just that??” I quickly sent a text back affirming to her request and went offline. I had to think about it over and over again, I thought I was ready, but no, I'm still with the anxiety to try.

Before that day I had already made up my mind to prepare for the upcoming match I had on Saturday. I was trekking back to my house after coming back from my guy’s place. I saw a pharmacy along the road and I remembered she told me to get condoms. Mind you, it was my first time buying one, but funny I wasn't showing any sign of hesitation, I went into the pharmacy.

There was this beautiful woman assistant behind the counter, and she could see that I was new at it.

She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one.

I honestly answered, “No, this is my first time.”

So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty.

It was empty. “Just a minute,” she said and walked to the door and locked it.

Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside, “Do these excite you?” she asked.

Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was nod my head.
She then said it was time to slip the condom on. As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and lay down on a desk.

“Well, come on,” she said, 'We don't have much time.”

So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW, I was done within a few minutes.

She looked at me with a bit of a frown.

“Did you put that condom on?” she asked.

I said, “I sure did,” and held up my thumb to show her!

She told me to get off her and leave her shop.

Wait, did I do anything wrong?

Una no well at all at all... Xx

omikel:
Now, after that, it took its last bath here on earth and it was at this point I discovered it got vitiligoed as a result of excessive heat from the gas. Just look at it in its bath tub, me that wanted to go and bath initially is now bathing something else. O ma se o.
I remembered we were thought something called laceration in Biology practical those days in secondary school, of a truth, no knowledge is waste as I put that into practice here this day. I dissected it symmetrically from neck to anus and carried out some operational procedures carefully like it is been done on human at the theater.

Vitiligo Keh? Many werey dey dis nairaland o 😂

I'm reading this with a smile ☺️ 😊
Bon appetit! 🥩 🍖

israelmao:
Even in his strong state he couldn't.Is it possible in his limpy and crippled state?

No mind am.. Lol
Dey claim Yẹ̀yẹ́ strong man upandan 😂

Bearded man, you better chill. You that still escaped death by whiskers. Has your bombed leg healed already? Person who pass you, pass you. Better be careful to enjoy a long reign.

reddingtonblack:
PROTEST for you as what !!! what you stand for or emancipate for is National interest to begin with

IS sowore fighting for Tribe abi fighting for better Nigeria for ALL, so why should any nationalist protest for a Igboho a public Nuisance, thug that oppress and extort harding working people for money

In ibadan, soka esp. igboho have boiz that go round collecting Money from businesses nd anyone that build on land in that axis, lets not even talk of his crimes for politician boasting about disappearing gun

IF not that Nigeria is an insane Nation, a country ruled by criminal entreprise Should sunday even be allowed to Public comment ..

Nigeria is a shithole, a country that will honor tout over a graduate becos he has money

Everybody slave to money, no sense, a bsc holder will be clapping for Tout because of money

The National interest is a pipedream and a mirage, something already destroyed since 1966, yet you people still believe in it in 2026. Laughable!

Nigeria with the present system ain't going anywhere positive. Sowore, though good in activism and has stood up against many many ills is deceiving himself as regards Nationalism.

Even the Sowore can't be trusted if he becomes the president.

Sucre6:
They should field another senior keeper or, not when they loose now they will shift blame on the innocent lad

This is the opportunity for Nwabali to be called upon 😆 😆

Skippyvibes:
Good day all so I killed this rat thos morning what type of rat is it please

That is a Shrew, also known as Asín in Yorùbá.
The Shrew rat smells bad.

Kalulu44:
Went over to spend a weekend with a friend, Sunday morning while I was asleep he left for church. His younger sister came into his room where I was still lying down but no longer deep in sleep.
There was a big standing mirror in my friend's room which I guess his sister normally used.
She came in tying only towel, I pretended to still be in deep sleep but opening my eyes a bit. She removed her towel and was totally stark naked. Looking into the mirror, she muttered to herself "Onome, shey na dis fine body and shape only one person go dey chop, abegi."
Since that day, I had a different perspective about women

Deep we suppose fear o

Eriokanmi:
Especially people of your household. These are humans' worst enemies.There are some evil deeds you dont even get to hear with your human ear. You've got to be in the spirit to know this. If only God could open your inner eyes to see what that your wife or husband is planning against you, even when laughing with you in the physical, you would want to end the marriage immediately. I'm talking from experience of someone close to me.

My cousin from ekiti got married to a lady from abeokuta ogun state. His business suddenly crumbled, he was enmeshed in debts that he didnt know how it entered his business life. He almost committed suicide. Each time he goes to a prayer programme,they'd be asking him...where is your wife?One day he prayed in the night and asked God to reveal to him the reason behind his predicament and he saw his wife stark naked, cursing him in the den of the night in that dream. He woke up, terrified. 2 days later, a man of God told him same, that he should reverse the curse by also doing the same around midnight for 3 days. The following month, his business picked. A small fight erupted and the woman began to confess, she's looking like a mad person now.

What did she say was his offence?

willexyaho:
Sometimes, what looks like the “slow fade” from the outside is not always manipulation. Sometimes, it is not cruelty. Sometimes, it is not even intentional. Sometimes, it is simply a soul going through something it does not yet have the strength to explain.

There are moments when a person becomes quiet, not because they stopped caring, but because they are overwhelmed by storms they cannot put into words. Life can press on someone so heavily that even the things they love begin to feel like responsibilities they are afraid of failing. It becomes difficult to show up fully when you are barely holding yourself together inside.

At that point, it is not always about engineering someone’s exhaustion. Sometimes, it is about emotional survival. Sometimes, they withdraw not to punish you, but to protect you from parts of them they do not understand. Sometimes, they become inconsistent because they themselves feel unstable. And sometimes, their silence is not rejection, it is confusion, fatigue, fear, or quiet healing.

This is where emotional maturity speaks gently within you and says,

abeg, make this relationship dey one place for now.

Not as surrender. Not as denial. But as wisdom. Wisdom to recognize that not every distance is abandonment. Not every silence is manipulation. Not every reduced presence is lack of love.

It is the decision to stop forcing clarity where someone has none to give. It is choosing peace over pressure. It is allowing space without immediately translating it into betrayal. It is understanding that some people do not leave loudly, they simply retreat inward to find themselves again.

And sometimes, the strongest thing you can do is not to chase, not to accuse, not to assume the worst, but to remain calm, grounded, and patient with reality. To let things rest. To let emotions settle. To let truth reveal itself without force.

Because not every fading moment is the end. Some are pauses. Some are internal battles. Some are chapters of healing that have nothing to do with you, and everything to do with the silent wars they are fighting within themselves.

Wow... You must have gone through a lot to know all these.. So true, very aptly written from a depth of rich experience. Your ability to put it into words in a simple way makes the wisdom you are passing across more beautiful.

Life is so deep, and truly there are battles that are extremely difficult to put into words, coz only the bearer of the burden understands the oppression and weight.

Rich and vast experience in life navigation makes us shrewd in judgement and reduces our harshness as long as empathy is present.

May every good battered soul be healed and may we find ease in our lives' journey.

#Permission to copy

sonnie10:
This is a welcome development. 2027 no time for rigging the election. The disgrace will be televised live .
But I still have some reservations anyway.

This is how we were told that the deployment near Venezuela was to stop drug traffickers but it ended up being a covert operation.
Like play , like play City Boy fit enter one chance!

Make dem enter one chance, since dem stvpid and no get sense to act like sane people. Let the government be taken away from them.

verminnel:
She may be a witch. Some of them spiritually exchange theirs with goat toto and reserve their real puna for who they want to marry. This might be the case with her .. pls dnt say im being superstitious do your findings, im a girl and ive heard girls discuss and laugh about this and i personally dont think its mere jokes

Yeah, I've heard something like this before, as far back as 2007, but in this case, na pig toto 🤣🤣🤣 WTF Meeehn!

SpaceX:
Blood of Jesus, don't go this route please

Why are you begging him 😂

43Ronin:
He wanted to close the tournament as the highest goal scorer and the paneka. The guy that initially wanted to take it would have made history in Africa by being the only player to have scored in 5 successive afcon. Thats to tell you he wanted the glory

Lol... He's under a spell 😂😂
Senegal voodoo is strong 😂

Was that penalty kick deliberately unserious in order to pacify the Senegalese team or he's under the influence of voodoo
Abi he's so confident to take a panenka style kick
Ayam still confused o coz no be dis kain match dem dey use panenka if you no be star player

Dotherightthing:
The officiating was FAIR ENOUGH abeg

We dropped the ball in the penalty shoot-out which we desperately worked towards

Shut up, you are daft... See the picture up there with Bassey's shirt being pulled, and Bassey was booked with a yellow, so the referee was blind àbí?

mysticwarrior:
Why is oliseh looking like a drenched wall gecko?

Ahn Ahn! Your mouth no good o 😲😲😲🤣😂

nnamdi640:
Most of the online hussle are highly competitive. I remember learning data science, I submitted CV tire

Have you now gotten the dream job?

Chai.. America happened to them. May they rest in peace.

Sirmwill:
If someone had lit fire around you, you could have been the new Ghost rider

Thank God for your life
You just lost your chance

Shey ẹ ń gbọ́ werey

He has greatly improved... Or should we say that he's just very much in form? 🤔🤔🤔

He should try and keep it up!

I know say Uganda go score... Na super eagles trait to be careless. Mtchew😪😪

Na this kain team no fit secure win with one goal up. E just pain me why dem no go go world cup. They need to go and get sense their via some experiences. They will think twice wen dey wanna be lackadaisical during play. 😪

Jakumo:
The chartered helicopter could have taken the champ from his hotel in Lekki, Lagos, directly to Ibadan in less than 15 minutes flight time.

For all his brilliance, technique and power as a world-class boxer, Anthony Joshua's instinct for self-preservation was not attuned enough to prevent him from traveling aboard a flashy new SUV along one of the most kidnapper-infested highways on this green planet.

A man worth tens of millions of dollars would have been the hostage catch of a lifetime for a terrorist Fulani kidnapping bandit gang of the sort that set up frequent blockades on that same Ibadan Expressway with regularity. until just a few months ago when security was beefed up in the area.

Ẹ̀gbọ́n... This thing wey you write no be am. You never dey the gang of who I go insult. Merry Xmas and happy new year in advance.

DelilahMakinde:
The driver might have been British based. You drive on the left we dive on right. That could explain the wrongful overtaking.

Another brilliant angle, you're sensible.

JoeEeL:
The way she wryly smiles while holding that door, u can daamn tell the house was not gotten by the traditional route of labour.

Lol.. You people are too funny 😂

tolurx:
That shouldn't have been a penalty. The officials just bowed to the pressure from the crowd. Its absolute rubbish.

God pass them

Jerry2rule:
My brother i say i will not watch their match again BP fit kill person

Lol
Dem no dey disappoint. Imagine say na world cup we dey and we dey lead one tough country by 3-0, person go almost die if dem equalize, coz world cup bad ga an, small lose guard, you go pay dearly for am and they will definitely equalize.
I pity those who dey bet

Super Eagles and HBP are like 5&6... Thank God say I no watch the ball
Imagine, leading by three goals and small remain make dem equalize us

Charis15:
Laughs
I see cute guys everyday.
He isn't so handsome, I'm just attracted to him.
Are you trying to say he is the most handsome guy I have met?
But it's my first experience of falling for a guy like that.

He could be a connection from past life or not, but love at first sight is real. If anybody likes, let them call it lust or not. 😘