₦airaland Forum

dipo2much:
YOU DONT NEED BIGGER JUGS. YOU ARE SLIM AND BEAUTIFUL. YOU SHOULD BE CONTENT WITH THAT. WHAT IF YOU WERE BORN DWARF?

You Lost me on the dwarf part.  What's wrong with being a dwarf? Don't bother answering. . .it won't make sense anyway.

ariblaze:
lets seeeeeeeeee

hmmmmmm

that would be my granma

Rotflmao, I don't know what this means. . .I don't even know why I'm laughing but I can't help it.

Hmmmm. . .errrrr. . .ehmm. . . When he. . . let's say I. . . that won't do. . .  .*Jeopardy song playing* Okay i got it, if he. . .nah, that won't make me cry.

You know what, I'll be right back. . .I err. . .think I hear my boss coming. Yes, yes, that's it. . .my boss is on her way here and I don't wanna get fired. Now THAT will make me cry.

ariblaze:
burning train

daravia

najina

Have you seen the new ones? Beautiful! Try. . .

Kuchi Kuchi Hota Hai (The reigning Prince and Princess of Bollywood SRK and Kajol)
Kabhie kushi kabhie gham (SRK & Kajol)
Dilwale dulhania le jayenge (this one is not really new but it's still good with SRK & Kajol)
Maine pyar kiya (not new too. . .this was before Salman Khan started looking like a toad)
Mohabbatein (With the King of Hindi movies Mr. Bachchan himself, SRK and Ash)
Devdas (With SRK, Ash & Madhuri Dixit)
Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna (THE BEST in my opinion with Bachchan, Bachchan Jnr, Rani, Preity. It could have been better than best with Kajol in Rani's role but then again, I am biased)

Check them out if you haven't.

Have we strayed from the topic?

Why watch a romantic crapola (both black & White) when you can watch a nail-biting thriller or action movie?

There are only two romance movies I can watch every hour of every day is. . .

When Harry met Sally - Because it's close to real life.
Twice Upon a Yesterday (Sometimes called The Man with Rain in His Shoes) -  The idea that you can turn back in time to right your wrongs, intrigues me.

Other than those movies. . .Everything else is crap and the crappiest of them all is any Tyler Perry Movie. Oh my Goodness, everything. . .every word in every dialogue spoken by every character is so freaking CONTRIVED. How can anyone stand it?!!!

For Naija movies, I'll give the Violated. . .even though RMD's character is so far from reality of what a Naija man is. I wonder if he won best actor for that because it must have been had channeling a character that does not exist.

H: You have good looks and a very good personality
A: You have trouble trusting people
L: When you smile you make other people smile (I don’t know about this one, usually when I’m smiling. . .people are either frowning or crying)
I : You are loved by most, hated by many, yet wanted by plenty
M: Success comes easily to you.
A: You have trouble trusting people
T: You are one of the best in bed.
You : You are beautiful and sexy.

S: People think you are so sexy.
A: You have trouble trusting people
D: You are popular with all types of people.
I: You are loved by most, hated by many, yet wanted by plenty
A: You have trouble trusting people
T: You are one of the best in bed.

Should I be worried that “You have Trouble Trusting people” come up four times? Any Psychoanalyst in the house?

almondjoy:
Still thinking. . . . .what exactly is this topic about?

You took the words right out of my mouth. . .err. . .fingers but I figure going with the TOPIC will be safer than trying to make sense of the write up.

So what Annoys Girls Most (about a guy, I assume). . . this is my answer

Indecisive Guys. . .
One minute is Yes,
Next it is No,
Tomorrow it is Maybe,
The day after it’s I think so
On Tuesday it’s I’m not sure
Come Tuesday Night, it's Most certainly perhaps
Wednesday comes it’s I think so maybe Yes.

Jesus! An.noy.ing to the MAX

Oh yeah and thread subjects  that don't match up with what's inside (Lol. . .I kid, I kid. Having a mismatch topic and write up makes things fun, no?)

A Guy with a good head on his shoulder. Honestly, looks don't really matter to me. . .I'm attracted to a guy's intellect.

Falling in Love with Love while single. . . Sweet!!!!

The Whole Village?

LMAO

Oh my Goodness! Where did you get that necklace?!!!

Mai Chiki. . .walai ba na so suna nan.

Let's take this offline. NOW.

ariblaze
LOL. . .what tipped you off?

Why not?
Why not?
Why Not?!

We have our own needs too now, why should guys be the only ones having all the fun?

Don't do what you won't want or like me doing, simple as that.

Eccentricj
Okay, I remember Ebvu my love. . .Good book but I don't know you.

@ lonleypal
Come on, this is not picking his nose in public or scratching his butt while standing in line. He's telling their private business to the world. If this were a woman now you'll hear "women can talk to much, olofofo and the rest of the insults. If she was with Radio Nigeria now, at least she would have resigned herself to the fact that all her business will be public.

@ Poster
Please do what you have to do.

Where will I meet him? I mean how will our paths cross?

Stillwater, pls you don't have to apologize oh jare. What you want is what you want. . .no offense there.

Oh I forgot to add, tell her the reason you can't do a party with your new girl is because she's too goody, goody and she'll never agree to it but her. . .shebi is her now (wink, wink) and then laugh the [I]you know what I'm saying[/I] kinda laugh. She'll be soooo offeneded ehn, she'll be telling YOU never to call her again. Finito.

Next time she calls, pick up the phone, be nice to her tell her. . . she's not not an [I]omo ale oh[/I] because you were just thinking about her. She of course will be all interested and ask you what you were thinking. It's now you will tell her of this wonderful dream you had where she was the star. . .then pause and say never mind. At this point you know she's salivating like pavlov's dog and she'll say tell me now, then you tell her the dream is of you having a party with her and one of your friends, one you know she does not like, that she loathes with every fiber of her being (there's always one) Tell her you've already spoken to the guy and he is open to it. . . In fact, He is here as you speak and all that is left is for her to say yes to get the show on the road. Try to say all of these very convincingly because I'm sure the thought of doing it with your best friend makes you wanna gag but for it to work, you must pretend the idea is so sweet to you ehn, you can't wait to for all three of you to jump in bed.

If she ever calls you again, I owe you 300 bucks. A l l a h, I'll send you the money through a paypal account but you have to show proof 1st oh. You can then use the 300 bucks buy a plane ticket out of town after she tells the whole world you're a sexual sicko. . .but at least she'll stop calling you. Mission accomplish.

morenike09:
@sisikill. . .man, i love those songs. you know where i can listen to it? dnt think youtube or itunes have it

I tried YouTube and I promise you. . .you do not want to know the results that came up. LOL. I'm gonna try 360 Share later on today and if i get any results, I'll post it.

Gamine:
Sisi

no wahala.

lol.

Children of God will you shout Halleluyah
Shout halleluyah to the Lord to Infinity

Halleluyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Haaaaaaalleluyah, Halleluya, Halleluyah

Lol. . .Man! I remember Primary School Assembly.
God bless St. Anne's in Kaduna.

Gamine:
@Sisikill
your name worry oh

I didnt know that song was so long

Lol. . .Haba, Why now? I am good, don't worry

I didn't know it was that long either.


Okay, time to go all Naija proper.

Lori oke, ni petele,
lori le, ati l' okun (2x)
Halleluyah!
Oluwa ni ipin mi ni le agbaye,
oluwa dara titi aiye (2x)

On the mountain, in the valley,
on the land, and in the sea (2X)
Halleluyah!
The Lord is my portion in the land of the living,
the lord is good forever more (2X)
********

Ijo lemi o maa jo
Erin lemi o maa rin
Olugbala ti damilare
Ota ma yo.
*******
(For Easter)
He has done for me
He Has done for me
He has done for me
He has done for me

What my mother can not do
He has done fo me
What my father can not do
He has done for me
What my sister can not do
He has done for me

********
He has given me victory,
I will lift him higher
Jehovah
I will lift him higher.

Satan comot for road
I get holy ghost (not sure)
I no get break oh
I go jam you, you go die (?)

*****
Ope mi ko e to
Ojo ju mo ni mo ma dupe
Ope mi ko e to o
Ojo ju mo ni ma yo

*******
Daling Jesus, Darling Jesus
oh my darling Jesus,
You're a wonderful Lord
I love you so much,
My darling Jesus
Oh my darling Jesus,
You're a wonderful Lord



This last one I'm sure about the lyrics but my grandmother loved it.

Ara e di de ke ba mi jo
Eniyan mi eba mi yo
Oluwa mi lo gbe mi ga

Something, something
Something, something
Something, something ko se ope
Ope ni te mi lojogbo gbo (I am sooo sorry about the something somethings, Hopefully someone. . .Mr. Lafile might help out again. Thanks)

Mr. EccentricJ (nice name by the way,)

"Assessment Purposes, hun? Well far be it of me to deny a fellow do gooder. So how do you want it? Half or Full?

Because Of Who You Are
Because of who You are, I give you glory, (mmm)
Because of who You are, I give you praise
Because of who You are, I will lift my voice and say
Lord I worship You, because of who you are,
Yes I do, I do worship, because of who you are


Because of who You are, I give you glory, (Yes, Lord)
Because of who You are, I give you praise
Lord, because of who You are, I will lift my voice and say
Lord I worship You (Worship God), because of who you are,
Lord I worship You (worship you), because of who you are,
Lord I worship You, because of who you are,

(Jehovah Jireh, you’re my Provider)
Jehovah Jireh, my Provider
(Yes you are, yes you are)
(Jehovah Nissi, you reign in victory)
Jehovah Nissi, you reign in victory
(Jehovah Shalom, you’re my Prince of Peace)
Jehovah Shalom, my Prince of Peace
(Lord I worship you), because of who You are,
And I worship You, because of who You are (you are, you are)

(You’re Jehovah Jireh, Hey you’re my Provider)
Jehovah Jireh, my Provider
(Jehovah Nissi, you reign in victory)
Jehovah Nissi, you reign in victory
(Jehovah Shalom, When the enemy comes in like a flood, yes, my Prince of Peace)
Jehovah Shalom, my Prince of Peace
That’s why I worship you, because of who You are,
And I worship You, because of who You are (And I worship You, because of who You are)

(Jehovah Rapha, when I’m sick in my body you’re my Healer)
Jehovah Rapha, you’re my healer
(Yes you are, yes you are)
(Jehovah Shammah, you’re always with me)
Jehovah Shammah, always with me
(Jehovah Sabaoth, you’re my strong deliverer)
Jehovah Sabaoth, strong deliverer
(I worship you, yes I do, yes I do)
(And I worship You, because of who You are)
And I worship You, because of who You are
Jehovah Jireh (you’re my provider)
Jehovah Nissi (you reign in victory)
Jehovah Shalom (you’re my prince of peace) (my prince of peace)

Because of who you are (because of who you are)
Jehovah Rapha (when I’m sick in my body, you’re my healer)
Jehovah Shammah (you’re always with me)
Jehovah Sabaoth (you’re my strong deliverer)
Because of who you are (yes you are)

Jehovah Jireh (provider)
Nissi (victory)
Shalom (prince of peace)
Rapha (healer)
Shammah (with me)
Sabaoth (strong deliverer)
Because of who you are
(Jehovah Jireh) provider
(Nissi) victory
(Shalom) prince of peace
(Rapha) healer
(Shammah) you’re with me
(Sabaoth) strong deliverer

Because of who you are
Because of who You are, I give you glory (I give you glory)
(Because of who You are, I give you) (you’re worthy, worthy)
Lord I give you praise
(Lord it’s because of who You are, I will lift my voice and say) (yes I will)

(You’re worthy Lord, we worship you)
Lord I worship You, because of who you are,
(We honor you, everyday of my life I worship you lord)
Lord I worship You, because of who you are,
(Who you are, who you are)
Who you are


On how to get these songs. . .err. . .I don't know how appropriate it is to tell someone how to download free stuff on a religion thread but you can 360 Share. It's got everything.

God Forgive me

<b>As the deer panteth for the water</b>

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee

Chorus:
You alone are my strength, my shield
To you alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee

You're my friend and you are my brother
Even though you are a king
I love you more than any other
So much more than anything

Chorus
I want you more than gold or silver
Only you can satisfy
You alone are the real joy giver
And the apple of my eye

Why can't we make Classic epic movies?

. . .Because we can barely make non-classic, non-epic movies.

coolfunke:
Hi Nairalanders,
I would really appreciate if i can get help. I really would love to have a full chest. I admire girls with full chest.

What can I do aside surgery to enlarge my breast?
I love my figure, slim and beautiful but a moderete breast ( not too big) would just cap it up.

My husband likes big bust but he's not complaining sha.

Nairalanders, please help a fellow sister.

Rotflmao. . .I have just 6 words for you. Be Careful What You Wish For.
Have you ever tried having a conversation with a guy and all he's staring at is your chest? NO, Lucky you.
Have you ever gone to the store, saw a top you really like but you have to get Larger size to accommodate the girls? NO. . .lucky you.
Have you ever had guys approach you because to them big boobies automatically mean you'll jump in bed with them? NO. . .God, can I be you? Please?
Have you ever walked down the street and hear people say "Whoa look at them titties?" No. . .well neither have I but I hear it's a horrible feeling.

Okay, okay. . .that was more than six words but I'm sure you get my point.

Tips4love:
I've been hearing you all accusing, degrading and few of you encouraging this girl. What is wrong if a girl is in love with her pastor. Who is a pastor anyway by definitions, a man of God? Fine, well folks everyone here is a Man OF GOD, so that doesn't make a pastor holier than anyone else in this forum. The bible, your bible said man was created in the image and likeness of God and that means everyone her have the same potential and ability of any pastor or higher, so this girl being in love with her pastor in nothing silly or sinful, She's human, she's got feelings and she has every right to say she's in love with anybody including a pastor, her pastor, Bush, Obama, Bill Gates or even one of you guys in this forum condemning her for expressing herself here.

No man is holier in the eyes of God than the other because everyone of you here is created with the same substance and that substance is pure love. I have no intention of berating your pastors but when a person or some group of people tend to place themselves higher than others, when they are still treading on earth and breathing in the same air with the plants and animals then the are nothing but still humans evolving.

Girl, if your pastor in not married, then go up to him and tell him you love him and if he's man enough he will know how to handle that love declaration. Is either he loves you back or he teaches you how to transform your feelings into a sublime love for yourself and others.

I know most of you here will not agree with me and will flame this place with disagreeing comments but remember it better to know the truth and live by it courageously that to live under someone else umbrella all you life.

Okaaay. . .let's get things straight,
It's not about people thinking pastors are Gods themselves, therefore mortal women won't cut it for them
It not about people thinking she's not fit to be with a pastor.
The general consesus is that it's WRONG because he is a MARRIED PASTOR. . .you know with a WIFE. Sheesh!

Oh one more thing. . .

Obama - Married
Bush - Married
Gates - MA.RR.IED.
So except you're telling her to go after married men. . .I fail to see your point of bringing these men up.

shamix:
I have been a member of some church for a couple of Months but i have a problem. Every time i see my pastor preaching , butterflies start running in my stomach. This has been going on for some time but i don't know what to do since he is married. Can I tell him? Advise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Three Reasons why you shouldn't

1) He's married
2) He's married
3) HE IS FREAKING MARRIED.

And maybe it's time you looked for another church. . .obviously, it's a waste of time going to this church since it does nothing for your spiritual growth. Besides what happened to the whole fleeing from temptation the bible teaches? Abi those pages are stuck togethe in your bible? Well if that's the case, let me help you out here. . .

2 Tim 2:22 (KJV)  Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a
pure heart.

No where does it say go on a public forum and ask for advice hoping someone will tell you what you really wanna hear.

Pitokwe:
Can somdy please tel me why girls in lagos are shameless.In the north were i grew up,if u want to make love to girl,she would be struggling and hiding her Bud,but in Lagos before u say hi,the whole clothes are off and even after sex,they stay naked with out shame.Why?

Tee hee hee
As a Kaduna girl, I think I’m gonna stay out of this one but before I do,  I’ll say this . . .I don’t think it’s shamelessness per se. They are just very brash and very forward (wait, is that redundant? Oh whatever). Anyway, I remember when we were in boarding school (in Katsina) us northern girls used to look and listen in awe at how the southern girls acted and what they knew. . .to us it was like they were from another world, Seriously.

Also keep in mind that the north breeds demure women, who were not supposed to have an opinion of their own, women who were supposed to be seen not heard. . . .It’s no wonder some of us are rebelling in adulthood. Of course, we only do it on the net where anonymity shields us. Lol. . .pretty sad, hun? Yeah, but what can you do?

LOL. . .Sometimes you Nairalanders confuse me. I honestly, can’t tell when you are joshing around and when you’re not.

Anyway, if you looking for a show to alleviate your boredom might I suggest

ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT

And the beauty of this is that you can watch ALL the episodes online.

http://arresteddevelopment.msn.com/

Just some lite fun . . . enjoy. 

cixluv:
what do u think about his.

as a guy, i love to drink (not to stupour).

i'm sure ladies too like to see their menses as a guarantee that they r not becoming mummies, so they expect it.

whtaz your take.

hunnnnnn?!!!!!!