₦airaland Forum

only on planes my brother, only on planes.

no tasking cos no benefitting from tasking.

an elephants ears cannot, i repeat cannot cause lift.

by the way, bright, i wanted to call you but as i was about to dail, i decided to read your updates on blacksheep, and i found out you were pissed at him and you were looking for where to vent. then i advised myself. i said "self... if den no teh you, you no go run?" and so i ran. shebi i try?

Moralistli: Guy, wey u? Ama quietly walk in, stil searching 4 an empty seat.. Wey dis guy na?

guy, see your pattern. very funny. really, youre welcome. dont mind teeo, hes just jokin. the only problem is that this is a thread for a select group of friends. actually, the only criteria is to keep a diary in the diary section. that way, we get to know you and know how to relate with you. so i guess we will be seeing more of you.

EyesWideOpen: Oh my my! Wat av I been missing? God! 6 pages already and I haven't even said anything!

now youre saying something. make it count.

am down for whatever only that i thought the year ended in december? did the cosmic rays affect the calender?

laziness is what is worrying me from updating my diary. abeg joor. let me go and update.

that wont be a bad idea, tgirl. but if thats going to work, like seriously, then the planning must start now.

no! no party. i am still hung over from the last one

whats all this noise about? cant someone sleep in peace? where is my tv? who stole my tv? oh! this is not my house. this is alosibys house.

how far now? how is everybody? whats happening here? who poured water on the floor? teeo? its okay. just clean it. am going home to eat. anybody want a ride?

btw, why are all of you in alosibys toilet? breathing in the sulphuric fumes? abi na the cosmic rays? bright please move your car so i can back up.

so while i was on set hustling, you guys were here organising a party in alosibys house? unu do well. dj bombastic lucky girl said you should play music that will scatter our brains. please i want to beg you people that otoxy is still in the cyber cafe so play music that will not scatter his brain o! teeo, pls knack me one udeme was a great man.

teeo, thank you very much. i for fear. eba not soaked garri. i get that.

and aladura is the word i was looking for. that is definately a yoruba word. abi?

also, my father taught me that soaking garri without sugar and salt can cause blindness. so i use both whenever am soaking. lets ask tuetbelle. so she can teach us a life lesson although its learnt late.

molly please. pleasssse.

bright, have you heard p squares song? the one that says- i go dey follow follow you. eh.

...no, theses no need to argue that. white garment churches are another national export which is proudly yoruba.

from colonial times, the yoruba have always been able to mix parts of their culture with christianity and form hybrid religions. examples are candomble, voodoo, and celestial movements.

in fact, i must confess that at a time, i thought cherubim and seraphim were yoruba words. sometimes, i still do. ibos would rather visit the dibias, in arochukwu cave.

bright, how can i love this thread more than my own diaries? i just love you more than my diaries. and since you are here....

teeo. you are wicked. that story is pure fabu. palm oil in soaked garri? why? bros eh. lol. all the same, i love ijebu garri but it smarts like lemons. and i wonder how they make it so sour.

mind you, not white garri, but ijebu garri.

so, alosiby, you people have a garri named after you. i hail o! if that one na stereotype, then that typewriter na baba.

now, where is that alosiby? bright good afternoon. why is molly not here yet? someone please tell her am missin her.

yes where is alosiby? something she said yesterday finally made sense. kept me awake all night. okay i exegerate. but all the same.

she said she was told by her mom, that ibos like yellow garri and i kept wondering what other kind of garri there was. it didnt occur to me that white garri existed. not until i called my sister and asked her and she said they also have ijebu garri.

but what really makes us nigerians is the ability to laugh at ourselves. these stereotypes are the only reason the entertainment industry is huge all over the world. people always look out for and encourage them. thats why jim iyke will always be a lover boy, and knight rider has a 2011 release, over 10 after the first one came out.

my brother tee, please forgive her and look at what one guy in the diary section wrote about us ibos. his name is hafiz of my nysc diaries. he said we eat people and that our ways are crooked. see, everybody profiles according to race and ethnicity.

it is a double post, but let me use it.

bright, what you are doing to the yoruba people is called racial profiling and its not funny. okay, maybe a bit funny, but you must understand that its discrimination of some sort.

as i type right now am laughing at all your incidences of racial profiling and how teeo might have felt reading it all.

babe, biko nu, calm down. it is true that teeo, would rather drink beer than fight you, but that is a good thing kwanu.

and my dear brother teeo, bright does not like jonathan. she calls him a mumu. i had to ask her to stop. because in my opinion. GOODLUCK JONATHAN IS THE BEST PRESIDENT WE EVER HAD.

i can only guess what your complaints about him are but he you can mention a few, i will try to show you why i have that notion. and please i beg you in the name of your best girlfriend either edit the bad odor part of that post directed at my babe, or substitute your babes name with hers.

erm, on the issue of water versus tissue, tissue wins, everytimme.

i would rather, you left your skid marks in your pants than on my palms, after a handshake, or on my face, when you are helping me burst a pimple, or in my mouth, when you pass me a cigarsette.

but since we all have to co exist in this world, the liliputians and the homynims, the big enders and the little enders, i say a litte prayer before i shake or allow anybody to touch my face. and i fast before i eat outside.

thats really bad. what options do you people have?

teeo, was your friend an indigene? or a moslem? if the people seem to leave in peace sometimes, how come they just erupt at other times? who or what instigates them?

am sorry to hear that farida. when i was in jos, i heard such tales. i have a friend who says he witnessed his fathers assasinction. he told us that their mai-guard was the person who led thugs to their house.

he and his brothers climbed a tree and watched them butcher his parents. story is too sad to tell. he says the judas inherited the house. is that possible?

but what is really the root cause? is it religion or politics or ethnic?

farida, pls pardon my asking, but are you a christian living in kaduna or jos? if so, please tell us what are the real fears you face. are the stories we see in the papers true?

i spent some time in jos. thats where national film institute is located. i schooled there but i was never part of the people.

so pray tell. how do you people cope?

bright, how far? its not what the cat dragged in but what it breathe in? you pipo will not ki us wit englis.