₦airaland Forum

chubinwa:
Am yet to see religion as a barrier to a relationship. except she doesn't love you. but if she does, she will break all odds to be with you. Love is blind

Yes she does, but no romance.

generationz:
Ajuju.

So, I'd people say deeper lifers are bad you won't date again?

You obviously dont know what you want.

#herdmentality.


Btw Mercy Johnson has a deeper life background. People are different.

If there's any one that likes to role with the crowd, then it's not me.

I actually asked this question because I haven't experienced love and peace of mind like I've had with this girl. She's everything I want in a woman, but our romantic lifestyle is nothing to write home about.

Skmoda360:
Sure I have .....I had to walk away without touching her but anyway sha I was once a deeper life member and my background is rooted in it i.e (mum and dad, deeper life member still)so I don't have problem getting one...now an MFM member though.

Please can you shed some more light on why you walked away. Was it just because she refused you sex?

joe4christ:
Just say it clearly. She no gree give you do shey?

Yes, she no gree. She says she love me so much, but no sex. It's quite boring.

Oluromantic:
Depends on you though. If you want to marry her you can keep her. But if you need real romance, you need a substitute or alternate somewhere while you keep this one. Because to be frank, she can't go farther than that.

You're right, she's a woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, but it's even harder to double date.

LordIsaac:
Except you have a Deeper Life background yourself you will never really understand them. Yet, the civilised one amongst them are the best choice you can ever make in women... That discipline and the drive to be successful. As earlier stated, it depends on individuals though.

Yeah, she's very civilized, well educated, but are romantic life is really weird. I'm attracted to her personality, but you know man is no wood.

doctore212:
I just finished banging one now, and she is off to church.

Op they are romantic

You lie, she isn't a true member.

Princesscutes1:
oga everybody with their character nothing like church....if you really love her then go

off course, am with her now, am just asking based on certain attitudes I rather see as abnormal.

Oluromantic:
They're normal girls just that your romance will be poor, you can't hold hands or walk together most times. you can't have some friends, you must be seeing heaven Everytime. Even if a girl in tight leggings pass your front, it's heaven u must see in that leggings

This is exactly why I opened this thread, she's romantic with the words, but physically, she's weird.

I hear alot about deeper life girls, how they can be very religious and all that. So, I've seen one am ready to go any length to be with her. And I want to ask if anyone here has been in a relationship with a Deeper Life girl, and how did it go?

michealdeco:
yes

Same with me

I loose interest in something very very fast

I remember learning coding and all of a sudden I lost interested and till now I keep postponing when I'll start learning it again

Even in school, within me and my previous performance am a naturally intelligent person but I find it hard to open my book unlike when I entered newly cus I've lost interested in school and am not even halfway done.

I also find it hard to read, until I was place on probation, then the As, B's started flying in, and my course adviser was marveled. Challenges are the only way I put in my best.

Just encourage yourself, remind yourself why you need to put in the work.

A lot of people have suggested going out more which is a very big challenge for me. But am ready to take on it.

beeijeoma:
Op truly your hubby has been disrespectful to you but all marriages go through teething problems . Mindset is very important in marriage and you need to decide from the beginning if you want in or out. 2 years in marriage is still early days and you guys are trying to understand each other and establish your boundaries. Words hurt but after a while you just shrug it off . If I go down memory lane and think of some of the names my hubby has called me I would have left him a long time ago. We have been together for 10 years now and I am enjoying my marriage like mad. If you and your hubby are talking and he starts getting upset keep quiet and say nothing. The day you know he is calm and okay go and talk to him and air your grievances. . Fighting and arguing does not help issues will only escalate. My husband is always worried when he gets annoyed and I don't talk he prefers arguments but I am now an expert in keeping mute. The only thing I cannot take is beating any other thing I just ignore. Just like you are a professional and well travelled are so many other women who are dealing with marital issues. If he says leave ignore him, if he leaves ignore him. If you ask him to do something for you and he forgets ignore and do it yourself. Don't let anger rule your heart choose to apply wisdom .

I prefer to read than comment most times, but this reply here is the only advice I think the OP should take.

As a man, I wont tolerate my wife challenge and argue with me, there are other ways to register your grievances which the quoted reply has advised. It simple, there's only one captain, learn to be a crew. And you'll turn the man hearts into that of a baby.

No matter how lucrative you earn, you're under your husband. If you keep on with the power tussle, then know it that your marriage is heading for the rock. There's no two ways about it.

Themarkethere:
Yes too much loneliness is the reason, yes also it is an introvert thing. You loose interest easily because the first sight of failure reminds you of the past failures and then you quit because you are not ready for another heartache. As such you only want to lunch again when you are � sure it will work and that might take eternity consequently delay. But if you lunch into something and it works you stick on and give out of the world's best right?

An extrovert on the other side just lunch out without thinking about the pit falls, he only realised he should have thought about it first before after failure but he may have struck on success as well, also he forgets quickly and thus doesn't recall the last failure when he wants to repeat a challenge.

It is the singular reason most extroverts would make it big first before their introverted counterparts even though the introverted one hass the best methods.

Solution is to go out there and stuck it out there even if the comfort of your home calls you because that loneness that gives that comfort is the same prison wasting your years.

You have a point, too much loneliness. And guess what, I find it extremely hard to go out, except necessity calls which is something am ready to challenge.

On the other hand, am so damn sure of success with the projects right in front of me, but procastination, lack of commitment delays everything. It's not just business, academically too, and even my relationship. I lost interest so easily, except it's a challenge with hard consequences as result of failure, that's only when I want to work.

Thanks anyway for your brilliant submission.

sunday478:
I experience virtually the same thing you mentioned up there. I have tried to get out of it severally but...

I am a freelance on fiverr, you need to see the extra efforts I put in to people's work. but my own ideas and projects peculiar too me. I usually procrastinate.

Hoping to learn a way out of this thing hear.

Good to see am not alone in this, someone had advised on this thread https://www.nairaland.com/1830091/introverts-lounge-extroverts-pls-keep/198 that while going out to work he became more motivated to take actions towards his plans.

Seems the too much loneliness could be a reason.

oglalasioux:
This guy is a real introvert. I can testify to that. Procrastination is the introvert's problem number 1. Next is the hurt to relationships. To even make or answer phone calls is a challenge. But when an introvert is challenged by a task, it's sink or swim.

Okay, looks like am not alone in this after all. It's quite baffling seeing your plans stagnant.

scave:
I don't know if introversion is the cause but I had same issues in school, I am this intelligent guy that people come to meet for help, I like knowing things by understanding it and I hate cramming and it affected my education too.

I was looking for job and I had interest in programming but during the period I was searching I was at home morning till evening and I was lazy studying web development rather I preferred watching film and playing games but when I got the small job am managing that's when I become serious every day developing myself immediately I come from work.

It may be your state of mind that determines your motivation.

@Scave, you sounded so familiar, I would like to see more response.

@ the bolded, I think you're right about the state of mind thing. Seems like meeting and interacting more could help.

Thanks for your time.

YoungBlackRico:
As long as I have the resources, I only take breaks.

This here is golden, I'll apply it henceforth.

Thanks for the response.

GrabHisBalls:
Oga, I am worse off. At least, you have three friends. I don't have any in class. I have a bunch of acquaintants, I am usually one of the first to leave my lecture halls after classes. The good thing about introversion is the room for critical thinking. I think a lot. There are times I deliberate refuse to over analyze things.

About your question, you need to start doing things differently. Be deliberate. There lies your answers.

Well you're right. But being an introvert, I would have appreciated it more if you'd laid emphasis on how committed you're taking on your tasks.

Anyway, thanks for your time.

GrabHisBalls:
Your problem has nothing to do with introverted nature. You procrastinate a lot and also loose interest in things. These are not peculiar to introverted people. Anyone could be you.

Well for someone who has just 3friends,

someone who loves the solitary confinement lifestyle,

someone who's in his final year, yet only has 1friend in class and some coursemate pop the question " are you in this class",

someone who lives class first after lecture just so I don't get to talk to others,

someone who is nice to everyone, yet regarded by some ass**les as proud and arrogant,

someone who hardly talk to girls, meeting my current gf was a coincidental,

someone who spends days indoors without stepping out, my neighbors often ask "did you travel?"

I could go on and on. These are attributes of introversion, I guess.

Although, I know I've been procrastinating, but why do I procrastinate even when am so certain about the result. Moreover, I don't like wasting my time, am always so sure of success, before undertaking.

I want to ask a question about something that has been bothering me for a while now.

I don't know if this experience of mine is associated with my introverted nature, or something else which is why I've brought it here to know if anyone else is battling with same problem.

Okay, am the guy who's into web development and programming, and ideas are abound (thanks to my introverted nature). I make 6-figures monthly already from my properties online, I've well taught plans to increase this (at least 95% success rate), but the biggest problem I've experience now is that am too lazy to get working on this projects that need my attention.

So, my question to the house is, do you feel overwhelmed with the tasks ahead and prefer to lie down there browsing through the internet, sit down there thinking, reading that interesting story or perhaps find a way to while away time rather than get working on the job?

You only get the best from me when am challenged. I loose interest in everything easily, it has affected my relationship with my lady badly, academics and business.

Please is there any one else here dealing with commitment issues, have you been able to overcome it, and how did you go about it?

Thank you for your time and response.

I want to ask a question about something that has been bothering me for a while now.

I don't know if this experience of mine is associated with my introverted nature, or something else which is why I've brought it here to know if anyone else is battling with same problem.

Okay, am the guy who's into web development and programming, and ideas are abound (thanks to my introverted nature). I make 6-figures monthly already from my properties online, I've well taught plans to increase this (at least 95% success rate), but the biggest problem I've experience now is that am too lazy to get working on this projects that need my attention.

So, my question to the house is, do you feel overwhelmed with the tasks ahead and prefer to lie down there browsing through the internet, sit down there thinking, reading that interesting story or perhaps find a way to while away time rather than get working on the job?

You only get the best from me when am challenged. I loose interest in everything easily, it has affected my relationship with my lady badly, academics and business.

Please is there any one else here dealing with commitment issues, have you been able to overcome it, and how did you go about it?

Thank you for your time and response.

Something I've learnt overtime being an extreme introvert is to try as much as I can to be happy.

As an introvert, you'll experience sadness to the core, and even depression which most times comes from you being much concerned about how people treat you after you've been homely and kind to everyone.

But guess what, no one cares about you. My idea, is to always say the words, "am happy" "I love myself" "I respect myself", just like who you're, stop thinking there's something wrong cos nothing is wrong.

I noticed I become unhappy when I try hard to change who I am, so love yourself and always put your interest first in any action you take.

What's in for me? that's the question I ask myself all the type, and it has helped me be more proud of myself.

Hello to all the intoverts in the house.

I never knew a lounge like this existed on Nairaland, glad I found out.

Before now, I've been quite depressed thinking I was suffering from low self-esteem considering the traumatic experience I suffered in the hand of my uncle's wife after my mom died.

But reading through most of the comments, I'm happy knowing am not alone. I feel so much relief.

God bless the OP that started this post.

I'll say happy independence to the ZOO REPUBLIC.