₦airaland Forum

D company:
I had to register on nairaland because i have seen a lot of useful advice on this forum.
My situation is quite pathetic because i don't seem to know what to do now hence i ask this forum for some advice.
A little about myself: 
I am 30yrs old, I finished my Nysc in 2005 and presently working in a procurement firm in Port Harcourt, my salary is 40k and i am squatting with two friends- one married with kids(His family lives in Benin) and the other guy is equally single.(he is 37 yrs old).
halfway into my service , i incidentally met an old friend(i will call her Joy) in  Benin whom i had initially asked out(first met her in 2007 in delta state when i went to visit my Uncle). we traveled together that same day , while i was heading back for my PPA and she was going home. i asked her out that day and she yielded.
the relationship was all bliss until after my service, when I got a job in Lagos and she was pregnant i was in Lagos while she was a student in Uniben(300 level), we got it sorted. after the pregnancy issue, we started having other issues and somehow separated.this separation lasted for about 1yr and we were reconciled again. The bliss lasted another 7months then another issue came up. (we had a truth or dare session where we both confessed our sins, although i think hers was more grave than mine) i confessed to having a one night stand with her friend way back in school, that was before she yielded say 2002. unknown to me the girl (Enitan) was her best friend up until the time of our confessions. Right after the confessions ,she started behaving funny and wouldnt take my calls nor return any. after much pressures from me, cos we were still apart, a friend of hers took my call and told me that Enitan was fetish and that she had started keeping enmity with Joy  because Joy stole her boyfriend and because of that she was getting off the relationship.(i was slightly drunk that day)
After a while again we started chatting and we got back to the relationship and off again.
the reason am writing this now is because we are back again to where we left off. she is still single and she is 29. what caused the last separation was that i told her she had attitude problems and that i was there to help her through it( not entirely her fault because she had a very terrible experience as a child and her mum passed on while she was very young. this led to her falling in moods occasionally) and her response was that there was no us anymore, that the handwriting was on the wall.
I called her last week, and she expressed herself as this" if only i could take back all i said" . the truth is that i love this girl so much such that i can never love another the way i do her.  and am thinking of proposing to her  when i see her in a couple of days from now. she also told me she was ready for marriage and that i have not shown interest in marrying her hence most of her worries.
On my part, my salary is 40k with no apartment of my own.
DO YOU THINK ITS OK I GO ON WITH MY PLANS OF PROPOSING TO HER NOW?

Aloy+Emeka:
I'd rather a vagabond succeeds a murderer like OGD.

teskyg:
YOU ARE A NATIONAL DISGRACE, REPRESENTING FEDERAL CHARACTER, YOUR ACTS WERE SENSELESS;
1.PUSHING THE GREEK
2.KICKING THE DUDE
3.STAMPING THE DUDE OUTSIDE THE PITCH,EVEN WHEN HE WAS NOT A THREAT TO YOU.

YOU ARE CRAZY, THIS IS LAST GAME IN OUR NATIONAL COLOR, GO AND PLAY FOR KATSINA UNITED, SUYA UNITED, ABOKI WARRIORS AND NAMA PILLARS, BIG FOOL, AS FOR YAKUBU ,THAT FOOL, IF I CATCH AM,

SapeleGuy:
This was a hoax in 2006 and it is a hoax now. I'm off to another thread.
http://www.hoax-slayer.com/malaysian-mermaid.html

Ayo Aina:
You dont need towalk him out. just invite him for a one on one talk and make him see resons why two drivers can not drive a car at thesame time. if he's an african man, he already knows the rules.

Spyker:
Present the case like it happened in your office, tell him indirectly and let him be the judge. Turn it the other way round like your wife's friend is making passes at you, you have warned her but she keeps coming. Make sure you buy him beer or what ever drink he likes, feed him well before bringing up the issue. When you are done, ask him what he expects the woman to do. If he acts like it doesn't bother him, then confront him with it. "A broken friendship is better than a broken marriage". Quote me any time.

African_queen:
I'll be angry dey didn't invite me. . .

sesman:
I'd join in and afterwards ill make the other woman my second wife and warn them not to start it again without me  

SA Goddess:
Shame man, so you got another woman doing your wife?  Tricky but it's not about you, had it been another man I would take it personally if I were you.  Maybe she is bi-sexua.l or was just experiementing with her "lover"  what is she saying?

djcrucifix:
woman? ope o! u're a lucky man i swear, look on d bright side, it wasn't a man and u can also engage d both of 'em, thumbs up! u go brova, no dull abeg.

zayhal:
Why are you talking about having intimacy with another person? Aren't you jumping the gun?

You should mourn your spouse according to the dictates of your religion or culture. After the mourning period, when you find someone, get married again and then talk of intimacy.

Right now, you sound like you already have a person waiting all the while and you can't wait to have intimacy with him. Watch it! People will say you and your boyfriend killed your husband o. You know Nigerians.

frosbel:
GOD BLESS ALL THE JEWS WorldWide and GOD BLESS ISRAEL.

Everlasting shame and anguish for all enemies of Israel.

https://www.khirman.com/system/files/image/ctc/israel_flag.jpg

Nigeria1;;:
can u imagine alam in balyesa paying himself. Some $100 million. We can not divided into 6 zone because some zone are 3 time or more in population than others. It is not possible. When you know that if you put Lagos and Ogun state together they have about the same population at the south east. how do you expect them to manage the people. if you want to create zone, create it based on true population. satellite picture is there for all to see.

chiozor:
can someone clearly read male and female response in this
@poster
just calm down and watch closely, you will definitely catch her if she is cheating. to the female whining it is her sis wedding, what if the man in similar case feel buzy without paying attention to you i hope it will be well with you.

@poster, from experience, what you said is one of the minor features of a cheating lady.

Romeo4real:
@dbisiback -
I'm sorry, but are we supposed to feel sorry for you after deceiving a man into marrying you when you did not love him, cheating on him, and confirming you would leave, if if not for the pity you feel for him? Are we really supposed to feel sorry for you?

You have confirmed that you do not love him and never did. You have confirmed that "no matter" what he does, you cannot get into the mood. This is of course, not surprising. You have confirmed that you are are an unfaithful wife. You have also confirmed that you are willing to leave him, except that it will "hurt him so bad".

I think you are a shameful excuse for a wife. There is no remorse for your infidelity and you only think of yourself. You are a selfish, callous, duplicitous, and deceitful cheat. You did not have to marry this man. Shame on you.

Blazay:
Not stupidity. They are married. Love conquers all, even if it takes ages.


The man is doing the right thing. One day, the lady will wake up and find him gone. It is a marriage with children involved. The man is looking at the bigger picture. Not every man wants to go chasing skirts and marrying more than one wife. You guys should keep educating her. She is only acting on what she knows. Which is poor upbringing and bad communication skills. Most women who never had fathers at home or had legitimately married parents in a cordial domestic environment usually act like this. Men too. It is all about behaviour modification. Some therapy might help too. Some kind of private counselling session with a pastor or a shrink.