I hope you find the help that you need. Be strong.

@OkunrinMeta,

You are very right bro. Religion is a very big bondage/prison in Africa (and the world at large). What makes it worse in Africa, especially Nigeria, are the wicked jailers that we have in the name of greedy men of gods.

I always had a good time the few occasions I've been to church here in the States despite being a free thinker. At leaset I never heard their pastor saying silly things like dashing him a whole January salary at the expense of one's family, or cursing because I refuse to part with 10% of my salary. Instead, I heard him announcing that people can come for the receipts of their donations and offerings in case they want to claim it as part of their tax return from goverment. They package enough food items every month for the less privileged in their county every month, I've even happily joined them twice to participate in the exercise.

He manages to feed his whole congregation of about 200 every (other) month, just in the name of having family lunch with his Christian family, and most of his members call him by his first name.

Even though they are also in bondage of religion, they are doing it in a loving and caring way. But in my fatherland,..........hmmmmm.

Hello mainanalyst,

Welcome to the world of freedom and inner peace. I've gone through similar scenerio as yours, though as "christian", so I think I should have a piece of advice for you.

I will encourage you to show her more love and care. I believe if she truly loves you in the first place, she will come around and love you for who you are now. Religion claim love and freedom, so why should you force it on anyone or hate them for not accepting it.

Secondly, try and get out of naija if you have the opportunity to do so, it will be better if you can take her and the kids along. An opportunity came for me to leave for America (alone) couple of years ago but I made sure I did everything I could to go with my family, and it worked.

Now, she knows I'm a better human being now than when I was a Christian and she loves me more for it. And yea, nobody is bothering my life here on why I don't go to church every Sunday. I only go when the kids make request that I should go with them.

Hope things work out well for you too bro.

mainanalyst:
How Do I Convince My Wife?


Hi everyone, I will try not to make this post a lengthy one.

I was born into a Muslim family and raised as a muslim. My wife met me as a practicing Muslim way back 2005 when we were both undergraduate in one of Nigeria's federal Universities. Recently, i started losing interest in religion, started seeing it as a source of division among humans ( like Muslims attacking Christians and vice versa). The idea of people burning in hell and some people enjoying in paradise makes no sense to me if God is really loving as claimed by theists.

But my wife is not comfortable with my religious views, infact she has started seeing me as hellbound ( don't blame her though, a true Muslim hardly marry from other religions talkless of marrying a freethinker like me ). I can see that the love she has for me is gradually reducing simply because I chose not to hold any religious views. I have no problem with her religious views, sometimes when she is far asleep, I will wake her up in the morning to observe her solat.

How do I make her understand that I can be a good husband to her without having any religious beliefs ?
The only thing she reads about are stuffs pertaining to Islam, she hardly read about science or other non religious topics. She is one of the people who believes that no human can be morally upright without having the fear of God or subscribe to religious ideas.


Just of recent, I thought of leaving Nigeria to any western country so as to be able to live my life peacefully without anyone questioning my religious views or tag me as an infidel. But I can't just leave everything behind just because my woman is not comfortable with my religious views and has been quarrelling with me on it.

How do I make her live with me peacefully without her feeling uncomfortable? Has anyone experienced this before ? How did you manage the situation ?

Another dunce with free internet and time on the loose.

awesomeJ:

There's definitely something wrong with your comprehension of the English language. Quote where I implied that only rice fills a man. if a post is higher than you can digest, why not just be silent rather than embarrass yourself of a public forum. Later now, you'll want to scold your child for failing English, whereas it's only in the blood. Again, quote where I said that only rice fills a man or just in your own interest, stop quoting me.

It's either you have amnesia or you are just naturally mischevious. Read your own post below which suggest the reason why you absolutely believe in Christianity is that the religion has principles which work. The only example of such principles you gave is that you pay your tithe and you have an overwhelming blessing. Then I tried to force little sense into your ______ that I and millions of people in the world don't pay our tithe and we still have overwhelming blessings. So, your hypothesis and conclusions are both wrong.

In case you will still be your arrogant self and twist your own words, I have my own simplest challenge for you: show me ONE benefit (with proof) of being a Christian that is not in any other religion.

awesomeJ:

Someone says, add some colour indicator to a volume of dilute acid, then slowly add some base to the solution, after a while, you'll observe a colour change. You follow the instructions carefully, and you saw the colour change. Would it be difficult for you to figure that what you've been told is true?

The christian faith has its principles. Over the years, you've applying them, and you've been getting results, Would you need anyone but yourself to confirm it trueness and realness to you?

The probability that Christianity is false is ZERO, because it produces results.

If in any slim chance, it turns out not to be the only way to God, I still have nothing lose, so long as I remain sure it's a way.

Tithe is an example. The principle is that if you pay it, you'll have more blessings than you have room for. I pay it, I have overwhelming blessings, which definitely implies that the principle is true, and the underlying faith is as well true.

Martinez19:
Atheists waiting for awesomeJ to come up with something reasoning.

You will expect someone that has the effrontery to call out Seun (for his belief or disbelief) in the presence of millions may possibly have something convincing to present: like a video of himself and God conversing about the growing numbers of atheist in the world. He gave the least convincing arguments that won't even move a 2-day-old atheist: incredulous testimonies and tithe. He was even feeling pompous ontop unintelligent propositions and arguments. The time he gave Seun to accept the challenge that will convince has passed blah blah blah.

awesomeJ:

Not being able to comprehend a simple statement only highlights a problem on your own part man. I said I ate rice and I'm full, you're saying because you didn't eat rice and you're also full means that I should deny the fact that the rice I ate is what filled me. You must be way down on glucose.

Stop trying to be smart guy, you aren't. Why would you imply that it's "only rice" that can fill a man and start vomiting gibberish when I countered that I ate yam and I was filled too. I may be technically hypoglycemic at the moment due to personal reason but my sense of logic is still intact.

awesomeJ:

Someone says, add some colour indicator to a volume of dilute acid, then slowly add some base to the solution, after a while, you'll observe a colour change. You follow the instructions carefully, and you saw the colour change. Would it be difficult for you to figure that what you've been told is true?

The christian faith has its principles. Over the years, you've applying them, and you've been getting results, Would you need anyone but yourself to confirm it trueness and realness to you?

The probability that Christianity is false is ZERO, because it produces results.

If in any slim chance, it turns out not to be the only way to God, I still have nothing lose, so long as I remain sure it's a way.

Tithe is an example. The principle is that if you pay it, you'll have more blessings than you have room for. I pay it, I have overwhelming blessings, which definitely implies that the principle is true, and the underlying faith is as well true.

Do you even think about what you type at all? Giving tithe as an example to validate your non-existing argument is like shooting yourself on foot. You pay tithe, you have an overwhelming blessing, I don't pay and I also have "overwhelming" blessings. So kini big deal?

awesomeJ:

To put things in another perspectives. Someone who was once the president of a local social club, but is now so broke that he can't afford his basic needs, says to another who is actually president of a nation such as Nigeria, he says to him out of ignorance "I have been in your position"
The latter will respond "sure you haven't" because he knows the very nature of office implies you can't be so broke as to be lacking basic needs because you receive entitlements throughout your lifetime after office.

I love this your analogy bro , I clearly understand and it cracked my up at the same time . Even if you don't see things from my angle, I see from yours: no need for further argument . Best of luck bringing lost sheep back into the fold .

segunojo866:
religion is harmful.
Stop going to church and paying tithes.

I still went to church today though: I love the simplicity of Jesus and true love/friendship the guy preaches. As par the tithe, I stopped paying a very long time ago before the era of free the sheeple when I discovered nearly a whole chapter on the actual acceptable ways of tithing in the bible which I never ever heard any of my pastors preached before (or after) except the dreadful Malachi 3 vs 8-10.

awesomeJ:

You are very welcome.
Did I mention anywhere that it was the Doctors' efforts that cleared this particular jaundice? or can you paste the link to the web page where it's be proven that putting olive oil on a baby and touching him with a white piece of cloth clears jaundice in 3 hours. You will hear of a supernatural experience, and rather than paying the due attention to its narration, you'll get in so much of a hurry to twist it by bringing a comparison that doesn't follow. What's MH business with doctors healing your baby's Jaundice? The one I shared is special because it got healed in 3 hours without any doctor's effort.

No doctor's effort as well, just the scientifically designed lamp. Yea, it may be special to you the same way phototherapy curing my child in 3 days was to me. There's no need paying unnecessary due attention to any illogical/fictitious story or well-orchestrated dramas. I've been where you are bro, super-zealous, tongue speaking demon chasing blah blah blah......attributing what not to. Just an advice bro, make out time to watch Grey's Anatomy (it's just 14 seasons so far ), be open-minded about life in general and stop persuading people to take up your religion (most times it's counterproductive). There are 1000s of religions in the world and if yours is the best, let your life preach it and convince others. Peradventure you compulsorily need to 'win souls', come up with some super convincing facts to do so. To the best of my knowledge (facts) christians live, die, go through the same ups and downs of life just as the remaining 6 billion unbelievers. So allow the latter to stick with their choices....the almighty God gave us that much of freedom of choice (free will) if you will agree with me.

awesomeJ:
Finally was this couple. Theirs was most overwhelming.
Got married in 2013, and despite much expectations, there were no babies. So in 2014, the husband suggested that they went for medical check up (you probably don't think Christians do).

After all the examinations, they found two fundamental issues wrong with the wife's reproductive system:
1. Her ovaries were not functioning.
2. Her womb was too small at 5 inches versus 6-7 inches that women should have. So it was too small, it wouldn't hold a baby.

So basically, all hope was lost for them medically, if there were any ways around it, I'm sure the doctors would have informed them, but surely, there wasn't.

So the couple took a step of faith, and emptied their bank accounts to the church, and by faith they exchanged the doctors' report for that seed.

Then in 2016, During one of the combined services at the redemption camp, Daddy Adeboye told people to pray that if there was any part of their bodies that wasn't functioning well, God should fix, and if it isn't fixable, God who has the spares should replace, she prayed that prayer, and months after in February 2018, They were standing in front of the congregation with their bouncing set of twins.

The womb that was measured to be too small to hold one baby held two -a boy and a girl safely for nine months.
Mind you, their prior experience validates the doctors' report, so don't bring the argument about doctors being wrong. plus measuring womb size and detecting nonfunctional ovaries are not things doctors can be easily wrong about.

It didn't end there.

After delivery the doctors examined the girl, and found that she had a low sugar level, the husband used the anointing oil on her and an anointed handkerchief as well, 2 hours later, the sugar level was normal. The baby boy was also said to have Jaundice, the husband used the anointing oil and handkerchief on him as well, and 3 hours later, the Jaundice was gone from the boy?

Tell me Seun, how would you question such a testimony?

Just give it up already bro. Yours is the most incoherent and halfwitted argument I have ever read my entire life, both as a former Christian and an agnostic, no insult intended. You want to convince an atheist with a possible occurrence of life that he can easily get numerous explanations to (from google)? My last child came with jaundice too and all his doctor gave us is a "lamp" that cleared the excess bilirubin from his system, guess I should continue serving her god of science then.

Fortissimo502:


Hey man. What part of MS are you coming to? What do you need?

College of Veterinary Medicine, MSU. I need info on off-campus accommodation and hospital my wife can use for delivery. I'm not satisfied with the update I'm getting from "The groove apartment" and "OCH". I wouldn't mind if we can make the conversation private as the issue is peculiar. Thanks for your understanding boss!

Fortissimo, I greet you bro. Please can I discuss with you in private on my coming to Mississippi? I'm leaving on Christmas day: your inputs are highly and urgently needed. Thanks boss!

Fortissimo502:


Hey my man. I dey o. How your end?

gunther6 I see you, bruv. Na you dey flex pass ooo.

Fortissimo, I greet you bro. Please can I discuss with you in private on my coming to Mississippi? I'm leaving on Christmas day: your inputs are highly and urgently needed. Thanks boss!

I'm so sad right now; rest well brother.

Inspite of my James bond swag and Apostle Paul's admonition that u are in a better place, I don't know why I still cry for u: is it because u died few days after my birthday and three days after my "introduction" party? Or because we slept on d same bed and gist all night a day before your death and u didn't even give me a clue? Or maybe because I promised to call u back few hours to your death due to bad network, which I never had chance to do. Abi na because u no dey my wedding ni, or maybe because u are not here to help take care of my new "maami". I know u have forgiven me; but really, i'm so sorry for not helping to complete your building before u left, sorry for not buying u d new walkman u requested, sorry for procrastinating on changing your glasses frame, sorry I can't keep all d promises I made to repay u back all your care, kind gestures and sacrifices. i'm sorry mum but more than that, I LOVE U MAAMI, love u more than a mouse love its cheese. Continue to rest till we meet to part no more....good to know that u came, u saw and u conquered.

playah P: May justice be done!!
But that guy get akpor brother ooh..
I wouldn't expose my bro even if he killed 1million pple... We'd deal with it the family way..

Mr Akuri, what do u mean by dealing with a murderer in a "family way"?

bore dear, is an understatement.

foot ball is your type of game, u better leave this mental game for me and d intelligent ones 'cos i can bet with u, u ain't winning this one.

JideTheBlogger:

Lol....you are not supposed to be on Nairaland then.

lmao...... u guys fit kill person. Sorry bro Gbenga.

kilimanjaro: She look like a ghost

Have you seen one before?

ayobase: Time never reach!

reach! for the prize, hand it over and let me get the hell out of this place

I've heard: you've made enough money, u only entered d game in search of your life partner whom you couldn't find in Nigeria. Come to think of it, you should be in kenya (abi, where d prince charming dey stay sef?) waiting for Prezzo to return as an emotional being that you are, instead coming home to explain yourself to most of these your bros that wont understand even if u book d whole advertising slots left in NTA for d rest of d year to tell them how you fell for d supposedly intelligent guy.

wine tastes great especially when it is chilled

here is getting deserted since u won't allow a deserving winner (me) to go with d trophy. Why can't u just allow this game to end with this post of mine, abi u be coconut head ni?here is getting deserted since u won't allow a deserving winner (me) to go with d trophy. Why can't u just allow this game to end with this post of mine, abi u be coconut head ni?

i just checked d map now; it's 18 States altogether. D State i want to visit/live next is 'United'. Eyin oyinbo, e wa fun mi ni visa.....

don't quickly believe everything u hear or see