₦airaland Forum

The battery could be the problem because it is weak. Get a new one or always try to keep the temperature of the system cool at all time

osamaBUSH:
Now OP gon be lyk

Dis is d only place I reach u
Pls call me

popesam1:
Hmmm. I shake head without moving my neck for nigeria

How can u shake ur head without moving ur neck? How possible is dat?

osamaBUSH:
Well not exactly.You'd be surprised the number of offers I turned down. It's just that the will to stay lone was strong.

after tapping current n collecting gaint hugs....

nazoluv:
How To Check your JAMB Result online yourself. 2016 JAMB UTME result will be sent to candidate’s phone 30 minutes after exam and would be available online within the period of 24 hours.

The Joint Admission and Matriculations Board (JAMB) has announced that the results of Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examination (UTME) will be available 30 minutes after leaving the hall.

Meaning that candidates that participated in the JAMB CBT exam will get a graphical result sent to their mobile phones 30 minutes after leaving the examination hall, while the specific scores will be released within the period of four days.

To access your 2016 JAMB UTME Results kindly follow the steps outlined below.

Steps On How to Check 2016 JAMB UTME CBT Results Online.

Note: You will only be able to check your result after the exam.

1. Go to JAMB result checking portal at http://www.jamb.org.ng/unifiedtme3/.

2. Enter your registration number where required,

3. Finally, click on ‘Check Result’ to access your UTME score.
For more information and assistance call O8O34O44763.

since yesterday no alert and i even check online no result yet what do you advise i do pls help

JonSnow:
You and your friend are thieving Liars.

I shop on ailexpress. I purchase a usb cord with my GTBANK naira master card late last night. I was charged at 299.

Please you apc zombies should stop spreading rumors. It's no longer funny.

I will like u to tell me more abut dis AliExpress. I plan on buying from dem pls whatsapp me on 07068280278 thanks

endtimesblog:


hope dis one no go send person go prison now..

sai buhari sai baba....

e for make sense of na johnnie traveller

cmon:
JAMB Reacts Following Protest Over Closure Of Registration Portal

The Joint Admission And Matriculation Board has stated that the protest by some prospective UTME candidates is uncalled for due to the fact that the board gave an ample opportunity and time (August, 2015 - February, 2016) for every interested candidate to be registered.

This was coming from the board's Head, Media and Information, Dr Fabian Benjamin in a statement released to newsmen.

He further stated that the boards can not afford to make registration a continuous process as it has a timetable to adhere to.

“It is most unfortunate that some candidates waited until our website was withdrawn before making attempts to register,” he stated.

On the issue of special centres, he mentioned that the board will not create any special centres for the 2016 Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examination (UTME).

He reaffirmed that the examination will commence on Monday February 29th, 2016 and will be conducted in over 500 centres in and outside the country.

Source: http://myschool.com.ng/school/news/43644/jamb-reacts-following-protest-over-closure-of-registration-portal.html

Dis should have be d original post
Details of why dy are protesting

drss:
will they share rice there

No
Na dollar dy go share

Elijahrona2:
Her face no fine

D guy kns what he his after, afterall he see d face b4 u see am

Sunkyphil:
so because of #50 wey dem dash u u run cum open thread wetin make those wey dem give 5,000 do?

Dy are enjoying it of course
It jst like dangote telling Nigerians dat he will dash u money and at d end of d day he carry 100 give u how will u feel?

Lacomus:
How many persons yu don dash money today ?

B4 you criticize do this simple math 50 x 1,000,000 = ...........................

50,000,000
I expected more Dan 50 when I saw d phrase 'super bonus'
At least dey for use manage den I go understand say dollar dy very high

It depends on how and where u are looking at it
Either side is d correct answer

Glo Ng give me N50 to continue using their network
Should I be happy for this gift?
After receiving this text from glo with d word "super bonus" . I was expecting nothing less than N1,000 but I was surprised when I dial #122# and saw N50 as the super bonus

Some people self.....
D guy above me

It has also been used by many notable people throughout history...
"What the Bleep was that?"
- Mayor of Hiroshima
"Where the Bleep is all this water coming from?"
- Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a real fucking gun."
- John Lennon
"Who's gonna fucking find out?"
- Richard Nixon
"Heads are going to fucking roll."
- Anne Boleyn
"Let the fucking woman drive."
- Commander of Space Shuttle
"What fucking map?"
- "Challenger," Mark Thatcher
"Any fucking idiot could understand that."
- Albert Einstein
"It does so fucking look like her!"
- Picasso
"How the Bleep did you work that out?"
- Pythagoras
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?"
- Michaelangelo
"Bleep a duck."
- Walt Disney
"Why?- Because its fucking there!"
- Edmund Hilary
"I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?"
- Joan of Arc
"Scattered fucking showers my ass."
- Noah
"I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head."
- John F. Kennedy Dimaku.

THE WORD "F**K"
Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "Bleep". It is the one magical wordwhich, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, "Bleep" falls into many grammatical categories.
It can be used as a verb, both transitive (Johnfucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was bleeped by John).
It can be an action verb (John really gives a Bleep), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a Bleep), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific Bleep).
It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Bleep! I'm late for my date with Mary).
It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, Bleep she's also stupid).
As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "Bleep". Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations...
Greetings "How the Bleep are ya?"
Fraud "I got bleeped by the car dealer."
Resignation "Oh, Bleep it!"
Trouble "I guess I'm bleeped now."
Aggression "Bleep YOU!"
Disgust "Bleep me."
Confusion "What the Bleep.......?"
Difficulty "I don't understand this fucking business!"
Despair "bleeped again..."
Pleasure "I fucking couldn't be happier."
Displeasure "What the Bleep is going on here?"
Lost "Where the Bleep are we."
Disbelief "UNFUCKING BELIEVABLE!"
Retaliation "Up your fucking ass!"
Denial "I didn't fucking do it."
Perplexity "I know Bleep all about it."
Apathy "Who really gives a Bleep, anyhow?"
Greetings "How the Bleep are ya?"
Suspicion "Who the Bleep are you?"
Panic "Let's get the Bleep out of here."
Directions "Bleep off."
Disbelief "How the Bleep did you do that?"
It can be used in an anatomical description-"He's a fucking asshole."
It can be used to tell time- "It's five fucking thirty."
It can be used in business- "How did I wind up with this fucking job?"
It can be maternal- "Mother fucker."
It can be political- "Bleep Dan Quayle!"

07068280278

I was planning of relocating tot d problem was just my area not knowing it was general. Though thank God d service is back

nonstan:
surname yusuf...
state na plateau

help n check dis for me
hyelharamshelia@gmail.com
07038744643

nonstan:
surname yusuf...
state na plateau

thankx

nonstan:
any1 who has not checked can pm me

pls help me chech dis
punggeyusuf@gmail.com
2402lakama

hungryboy:
Other Bills
If you are a super saver, the best phone for you is a Nokia torchlight, china version, it cost 1200, and e dey play radio without earpiece, you no even need put the phone for speaker when you answer calls, cos it's always on speaker, and you have no need to subscribe data,
So money saved,
If you love browsing,
the best advice i'll give you is to get a cheap java phone that browses,
I use one and it cost less than 1k to subscribe data per month, and i always off images while browsing, so that my data no go quick finish.
Load 500 worth of recharge card in a month for important calls, and if pesin flash you no call am confirm who him be, if him get serious thing to tell you, him go load card call you,
No too like to call your girlfriend, just dey send am text ask am say, where and when can we see?
Drink garri and salt some days either as breakfast or as supper, if you are feeling rich, you fit buy sugar and groundnut join am.

Representing ur name nice 1

nicerichard05:
pls i having been trying to reg for some1 since mrn, it keeps saying my gmail has been saved that i should check my mail for confirmation, yet nothing is in the mail.

i have open more than 5 gmail address and even tried yahoo, yet no link has been sent. pls what should i do

i also try using an outlook email address still no result

swagifted:
anyone having problem of not receiving the link after registering?

yes oo guys pls wht is the solution

It's not moving either way

Thanks for sharing

Do u know that MTN has not paid the N1.04tn yet
Do u know that MTN deducted my 190 in 2 days last week

onstelly:
Ghen Ghen Ghen

Action film

nigeriancuban:
what if after trying the above and it still persists?

that's when it becomes an OS problem and after installing new OS and d problem still persist then u change ur harddisk and if it still persist go for deliverance

As outrage continued to trail the reportedly missing 2016 Budget presented to the joint session of the National Assembly on Tuesday, December 22, 2015, byPresident Muhammadu Buhari, Speaker of the House of Representatives, Yakubu Dogara, has described the reports as “an incredible and award winning April fool stunt.’Speaker, House of Representatives, Yakubu-DogaraAccording to Wikipedia, April Fools’ Day (sometimes called April Fool’s Day or AllFools’ Day) is celebrated every year on 1 April by playing practical jokes and spreading hoaxes.The jokes and their victims are called April fools. People playing April Fool joke expose their prank shouting April Fool.Some newspapers, magazines, and other published media report fake stories, whichare usually explained the next day or below the news section in small letters. Although popular since the 19th century, the day is not a public holiday in any country.Geoffrey Chaucer’s The Canterbury Tales (1392) contains the first recorded association between 1 April and foolishness.Describing the reports of the missing 2016 Budget as a hoax that came too early in the year, Dogara who took to his Twitter handle,@doyakubusaid: “1st April arrivedtoo early this year on Twitter. 2016 Budget estimates stolen at NASS? Pretty funny stuff!“It’s an incredible and award winning April fool stunt.“The budget is in the custody of the Clerk to the House of Representatives. I can confirm no one has broken into his office.“Each of the two Houses got a copy of the Budget estimate,” said the speaker.
Source http://www.vanguardngr.com/2016/01/missing-2016-budget-april-fool-dogara/