₦airaland Forum

Hmm

Nice post but lots of errirs

Ajibam, he is correct. Very correct.

And is woken up by St Peter. "So, that was Hell. Wasn’t what you were expecting, I bet?""No sir!" says the man. "So then" says St Peter "you can make your choice. It’s Hell, which you saw, or Heaven, which has choral singing, talking to God, white robes, and so on".

"Well… I know this sounds strange, but on balance, I think I’d prefer Hell" says the politician. "Not a problem, we totally understand! Enjoy!" Says St Peter, and clicks his fingers again.


The man wakes up in total darkness, the stench of ammonia filling the air and distant screams the only noise. As he adjusts, he cansee the only light is from belches of flame faraway, illuminating the ragged remains of people being tortured or burning in a sulphurous ocean. A sudden bolt of lightningreveals Satan next to him, wearing the same suit as before and grinning, holding a soldering iron in one hand and a coil of razor-wire in the other.

"What’s this??" He cries. "Where’s the hotel?? Where’s my wife Where’s the minibar, the golf-courses, the pool, the restaurant, the free drinks and the sunshine"


"Ah", says Satan. "You see, yesterday, we were campaigning. But today, you voted…

A politician dies.


And ends up standing in front of the pearly gates. Saint Peter looks at him for a second, flicks through his book, and finds his name.

"So, you’re a politician…" "Well, yes, is that a problem?" "Oh no, no problem. But we’ve recently adopted a new system for people in your line of work, and unfortunately you will have to spend a day in Hell. After that however, you’re free to choose where you want to spend eternity!"


"Wait, I have to spend a day in Hell??" says the politician. "Them’s the rules" Says St Peter, clicks his fingers, and WOOMPH, the guy dissapears…
And awakes, curled up with his hands over his eyes, knowing he’s in Hell. Cautiously, he listens for the screams, sniffs the air for brimstone, and finds… Nothing. Just the smell of, is that fabric softener? And cut grass, this can’t be right?


"Open your eyes!" says a voice. "C’mon, wakey wakey, we’ve only got 24 hours!". Nervously, he uncovers his eyes, looks around, and sees he’s in a hotel room. A niceone too. Wait, this is a penthouse suite… Andthere’s a smiling man in a suit, holding a martini. "Who are you??" The politician asks."Well, I’m Satan!" says the man, handing him the drink and helping him to his feet."Welcome to Hell!" "Wait, this is Hell? But… Where’s all the pain and suffering?" he asks. Satan throws him a wink. "Oh, we’ve been a bit mis-represented over the years, it’s a longstory. Anyway, this is your room! The minibar is of course free, as is the room service, there’s extra towels next to the hot-tub, and if you need anything, just call reception. But enough of this! It’s a beautifulday, and if you’d care to look outside…" Slightly stunned by the opulent surroundings, the man wanders over to the floor-to-ceiling windows through which the sun is glowing, looks far down, and sees a group of people cheering and waving at himfrom a golf course. "It’s one of 5 pro-level courses on site, and there’s another 6 just a few minutes drive out past the beach and harbour!" says Satan, answering his unasked question.

So they head down in thelift, walk out through the glittering lobby where everyone waves and welcomes the man, as Satan signs autographs and cherrily talks shop with the laughing staff. And as he walks out, he sees the group on the golf course are made up of every one of his old friends, people he’s admired for years but never met or worked with, and people whose work he’s admired but died long before his career started. And out of the middle of this group walks his wife, with a massive smile and the body she had when she was 20, who throws her arms around him and plants a delicate kiss on his cheek. Everyone cheers and applauds, and as they slap him on the back and trade jokes, his worst enemy arrives, as a 2 foot tall goblin-esque caddy. He spends the day in the brightsunshine on the course, having the time of his life laughing at jokes and carrying important discussions, putting the world to rights with his friends while holding his delighted wife next to him as she gazes lovingly at him. Later, they return to the hotelfor dinner and have an enormous meal, perfectly cooked, which descends into a food-fight when someone accidentally throws a bread roll at the next table . As everyone is falling about laughing and flinging breadsticks at each other, his wife whispers in his ear… And they return to their penthouse suite, and spend the rest of the night making love like they did on their honeymoon. After 6 hours of intense passion, the man falls deep into the 100% Egyptian cotton pillows, and falls into a deep and happy sleep…


And is woken up by St Peter.

This world is an irony

skrity has been defending seun and nairaland
has been acting like a peace maker
supporting d choice of d mods

but ended up quarelling with humble grace and gave her a warning

ajib, (babymod) ; who skrity has been advicing defended co - mod and warned him too

hahaha...cant stop laughing

What does a priest do all day?



What a priest does with his day is so varied and complex that only a sampling can be given here. Prayer, work, and leisure are all necessary for a healthy life. They try to make sure they have a balance of all these -- but they don't always succeed.
In the area of work (ministry), many have one main occupation, such as teaching, parish ministry, social work, or hospital work, all of which have somewhat regular hours and somewhat predictable demands.
The unpredictables are also interesting and challenging. They center around meeting theneeds of people: the sick, dying, old, angry, hurt, hungry, imprisoned, excited, happy. They share with them our understanding, encouragement, and support. Theye rejoice, cry, feel with them. Such events are both painful and rewarding, fatiguing and moving.

Parish priests function as head of parishh.he takes final decision in any matter. He tries to know parishoners though doesnt succed.

Priests have personal time where they study pray and prepare for nwxt sermon

They also confide on Mary and chosen patron saint.

However as human,there is the feeling to confide on a human being.

Each priesh have a superior. Most are chosen by the priest.the superiior is also a priest but more experienced than the priest.

Their conversation is guided under the oath of sercecy. The priest confides in him,tell him his challenge,needs and problem. The superior who had passed through similar issue acts like a counsellor by giving advice

priest may confide in personal friends or parrishoners but should be very careful as such an act may demorolise the parishonal catholic .such person may begin spreadin info which may tarnish priest image

Let me say they trust the pastors totally

The bible serves as a guide.......it shoouldnt be taken as d only entire word of God. It contains traditions too

Hmm.....i reserve my comment....i dont want to say one tin nw and my oga at d top wil....

CosmicJames: Declaring church account? Maybe not bad. Bt looking @ it with a biblical view, I think we shldn't b considering it as d bible is completely silent on such issues if I'm not mistaking.
I remember dat Judas was a treasurer dat was neva ask 2 declare d state of d apostle's account by Jesus Himself nor d apostles. Looks like d question of declaring financial account is nt important since d church is nt about profit n loss?

may b he was told but it eas nt recorded.not everythinn must be writtn in bible

Themoney belong to God. How dare u give God money and ask hom to account for it?









Just jokinng.op i support u

Off course

, but this is true for every vocation. And everyone has their own way of dealing with these moments. The normal ways of enteringinto relationships with others and finding time to bring the experience of loneliness to one's prayer life seems to help and give meaning to being lonely.

Those living Single Life often find joy and integration through their connections with people at their homes,work, church, and many other places where they help build a sense of community. And it is not uncommon that they find a deep senseof purpose and belonging in the volunteer work that many who live this vocation enjoy.

Dont priest get lonely?

How do they deal with not having sex?

Though this is a personal question that Priests and those Living Consecrated Life must answer for themselves, they often agrees that one way of dealing with not having sexual activity by being around life-giving people. This energizes them and helps take the focus off of themselves and puts it onto the other.

Yea@logicboy

It varies with various priest

They sometimes find the lack of support for their vocation and/or being misunderstood difficult to cope with. Over the years our society has at times undervalued and/or criticized a life dedicated to God in this way. Priests, and those living Consecrated Life, make decisions about their vocation in life after years of prayerful discernment. Sometimes they get discouraged when the people around them see their vocation is outdated or unhealthy.
Another common difficulty is living a Celibate life. It can become difficult to go against society's tendency to equate love with sexual relationships. It would be more accurate to say that sexual relationships involve a particular aspect of love reserved for married couples. But those who are not married — single people and celibates alike — are still committed to love in many other ways. Their love is often extended to those who are abandoned, sick, homeless, and despairing. Celibate love is also expressed in the ways in which one loves their family, friends and those with whom they share fraternal support.

What they find most difficultabout living Consecrated Life and/or being a Priest?

One’s dress often depends on the preferences of the person, community and/ordiocese in which they serve. For example, all priests wear a collar when they are engaged in ministry as a sign of their commitment of service to God and to God’s people. Those in search of spiritual help can clearly identify them when they are needed. This would also include Sisters who wear their community’s habit. Also, the more formal dress can be a public sign of the vows they are living out and when they gather in larger groups they can become a visual sign of unity.
On the other hand, there are those who sometimes choose a more casual dress. When a Priest and/or someone living Consecrated Life dresses like the people of the culture in which they serve the people around them sometimes comment that they feel more at ease. They make mention that it is good to see a spiritual leader as “one of us” in the way they dress. Someone who might normally avoid or pre-judge spiritual leaders may find themselves entering into a conversation with them because their vocation is not visually identifiable. Those who dress more casually also mention that this helps them to go unseen and remain in the “backdrop” of their ministry.
Whether someone living out the vocation to the Priesthood and/or Consecrated Life dress more casually or more formally it is importantto remember that one way is not better than the other and it is the disposition of their heart that matters most

E.g


Why do they sometimes dress in a collar ?

I am not a priest. Am a catholic and an ex alterserver...i have heard personal interaction with priest.


There have being a lot of missunderstandin about priest. Some belive you must be castrated to be a priest. Others think priest are gays and have no feeling with opposite sex.
The aim of this thread is for nairalanders to share some questions about priest. I, or skrytimi or chukwudi or other catholics would answer to the best of our knoeledge

Higuains wife
guestavo babe
suarez girlfriend



if you cant sign the players, loan their wife. May be she would give birth to a young suareez and arsenal can begin grooming

And the gods will ask Goodluct to


dance naked in the market place

take a bath in the river for cleansing

bring the left eye of a crocrodie

bring a 23year old tortoise

500 liters of palm wine

a tenyr old white virgen he-goat,cloth

an alligator paper

kolanut



or







1 billion nairra only

graciella: Is it not this same jude that said they will never sign any other act until. Psquare stops singing??

...nigerian musician words shoulnt be taken seriously

in 2010; 2face said he would get married

kc fresh vowed never to break up in 2009

[quote author=tpia@]crying and whining endlessly over internet matters, is not adult behaviour.[/quote]two wrongs dont make a right.

Expressing your opinion on a matter doesnt make you less a man .though ,too much of everthing is wrong

Every one has his own way of reacting to things they dont agree with. While some prefer, persuasion ,others use violence, insults, strike, dialogue etc. Some swallow the insult and ride on like nothing happened while others render their resignition leter.

Each has its own pros and cons ......but your own method mustnt be accepted as the best

of course ,all has one aim, to effect a change.,........

The question should be " has the change be effected"

I came to nairaland alone ...i will leave alone.....logicboy, muskeetor etc didnt come with me.

I came freely ....i'l leave freely...i wasnt forced or beged to join, neither will i beg any person


logic boy and muskeeto are adults capable of making their own decicion...

perhaps,theey have reunited at an atheist site...let them be


you miss them, so do i...so does many of us.

If they decides to come back, thats good but let the decision be from their heart ...not cos of other nairalanders

soldier come ..soldier Go...barracks remain

Why do i have the feeling that you are campaigning for mod