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Politics / Re: EXPOSED! How President Jonathan Puts Money In Your Pocket! by uprigtd: 12:00pm On Aug 30, 2013 |
Our Oga at the Top Ebele is Working, thats all. fresh air things |
Politics / EXPOSED! How President Jonathan Puts Money In Your Pocket! by uprigtd: 8:17am On Aug 30, 2013 |
An Informed Update on the Transformation Agenda Transformation can be defined as a thorough and dramatic change in form or appearance, so when President Jonathan promised Nigerians a Transformation Agenda, it is easy to assess if he is delivering on his promise by checking to see if there has been a change in the form and or appearance of Nigeria and Nigerians. In this short note, it will be impossible for me to address all the areas in which there has been transformation in the lives of Nigerians and Nigeria, however, permit me to direct the attention of Nigerians to the genesis of the Transformation Agenda even as I touch on just a few sectors in which transformation is apparent. When President Goodluck Jonathan was campaigning for the votes of Nigerians between 2010 and 2011, he came up with a Transformation Agenda whose details were shared with Nigerians and uploaded unto the website of the National Planning Commission (please seewww.npc.gov.ng). There were many agenda in that document, and these were tied to dates, including amongst others, an agenda to build more universities as well as improve the ones in existence, an agenda to improve Nigeria's power generating and transmission capacity and an agenda to improve on road, sea and air transport infrastructure. So, how has the President fared in these? It is now common knowledge that the FG has set up and funded nine new universities spread across the six geo-political regions which are now functioning, and enough has been written about these by myself and others so I would not dwell on that. But what about the other sectors? If anybody had cared to read today's papers, they would have found that 13 consortia had paid the 75% outstanding payments for the power generating and distributing companies that they bidded for successfully to the Bureau of Public Enterprises. What does that tell you? It shows that the president's Roadmap to Power Sector Reforms are working. The power sector is being successfully privatized. Now many Nigerians like to blame the government for inadequate power supply and cite incidences of the major Western powers and South Africa where the populace experience uninterrupted power supply. But what they fail to note is that in those nations, it is NOT the government that provides power. Rather it is the private sector, well regulated by the government that does so. President Jonathan was aware of this fact and knew that insanity is not just confined to roving about the streets or a sanatorium stark raving mad. In fact, the most elementary form of insanity according to the genius, Albert Einstein, is for one to keep doing the same thing while expecting different results. President Jonathan reckoned that if the government keeps on running the power sector it will be more of the same, so he fast tracked the power sector reforms and to prove his commitment and sincerity, he even let go of an effective minister whose presence made investors fear a conflict of interest. Now, for the first time in history, Nigeria's Gencos and Discos have been successfully privatized and you and I should know what that means. It means better days are coming. No private investor is going to allow his or her assets sit idly. He or she is going to run the company in a business like manner just as was done when the telecommunications industry was deregulated. But the President is not stopping there. His administration is leaving no stone unturned and this year alone, seven power plants and 150 new sub-stations have already been completed and are awaiting commissioning. Now, it is difficult to factor into the mind the effect of this breakthrough, but consider that one of these power stations which has gone into use already is the Agu-Awka power sub station. Now, hear what the All Progressives Congress, APC, flag bearer in the coming Anambra gubernatorial elections has to say about this feat. Said Senator Ngige, "Agu-Awka power station is a new transmission line that is under a test-run and that explains why in the past three weeks, major parts of Awka capital territory have been enjoying uninterrupted power supply.” Now, consider that 150 of such sub stations have been completed and are waiting for commissioning to provide power to more than 150 communities. If this is not "a thorough and dramatic change in form or appearance" then nothing else could be! Imagine that in Nigeria we had in the past constantly failed to meet our education targets because 12 million children roam the streets of Nigeria as itinerant scholars known as Almajiri, who have no access to the formal education system. Now, it is easy to blame the Federal Government, and this would be the reason why I championed a cause to get Nigerians to familiarize themselves with their Constitution. By virtue of the 1999 constitution as amended, primary education is devolved to the states and local governments. But desperate illnesses require desperate remedies and President Jonathan did not say that since this responsibility does not fall on him he should do nothing. He felt that anybody that has the ability also has the responsibility and he decided to intervene and directed his ministers of education to use federal funds to build 400 schools for almajiris complete with hostels for the students and quarters for their Malams as well as science laboratories and Qu'ranic recitation halls. As I write this, 153 of these schools have been completed and students are now in session. Now, you may say that this is just a drop in the ocean when you take into account that there are 12 million almajiris. However, if everyone had contributed his drop to the ocean in the years before Jonathan, there would not be such an alarming number! And finally, as I close this short note, it is a notorious fact that the people of Southeastern Nigeria are probably the most mercantile people in the Nigerian federation, they like to trade and it has once been said that if you go to any part of the world and do not see an Igbo, then you must leave that place because it is uninhabitable! Yet, the Southeast had never had an international airport though its people are some of the most travelled of any people on the African continent. President Jonathan again put on his thinking cap and began to plan to give the region an international airport. The Akanu Ibiam Airport in Enugu was upgraded, remodeled and today it stands proudly as an international airport. If you want to see "a thorough and dramatic change in form or appearance", I recommend that you travel to Enugu this Saturday, the 24th of August to watch as an Ethiopian Airways plane takes off with passengers on the inaugural international flight from the Akanu Ibiam INTERNATIONAL Airport in Enugu. Of course, it is easy for the opposition to scoff at this feat, but the ordinary Nigerian leaving in the Southeast knows what this means. Hitherto, they had to fork out sixty thousand Naira (N60,000) to fly to connecting airports before they could make their international flights. But today, they can spend that money on themselves and their families as President Jonathan puts money in their pockets. - Reno Omokri is Special Assistant (New Media) to President Jonathan. Source: http://www.dailytimes.com.ng/opinion/informed-update-transformation-agenda-how-president-jonathan-puts-money-your-pocket 2 Likes
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Education / Re: Two Students Have Just Been Gunned At The University Of Benin <Photoa> by uprigtd: 11:36pm On Jun 14, 2013 |
mehn its 5-0 oh! Watch out for season 2. I pway mek e nah blOOdy for we FYBs oh.. |
Education / Re: Two Students Have Just Been Gunned At The University Of Benin <Photoa> by uprigtd: 5:47pm On Jun 14, 2013 |
oboy, na over skill dey kill ninja o @koonbey |
Education / Two Students Have Just Been Gunned At The University Of Benin <Photoa> by uprigtd: 3:35pm On Jun 14, 2013 |
Two students of the University of Benin have just been shot by some unknown gunmen. The incident which occured about 3:30pm, Friday afternoon during the school`s Biometric capture exercise have left the great campus in choas. As at the time of the report, the two students hit are in critical condition and struggling for survival. #There are no live pictures now as I have to secure my life (I nor be james bond)# Stay glued for more updates.
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Jokes Etc / Nairaland Fire Crusade #boys..only# by uprigtd: 3:30pm On May 02, 2013 |
*prayer mode activated* BOYS ONLY Prayer point 1 My father my Father! Anywhere any girl is planning to use me as a MUGU, God destroy her plans! Prayer point 2 Oh God! Any girl that is using her breast to confuse my destiny, Holy Ghost fire! Prayer point 3 Any girl that has vowed that she would never date me, God make her to see me taking her shopping in her dream. .IJN! Prayer point 4 Any girl that has slept with 5 different men including me and wants to tie me down with pregnancy that is not mine, God make her forget my name! Prayer point 5 any girl that is trying my number because her BIS has expired, father God divert my number to kidnappers line! Prayer point 6 My father, My father, any girl that is seeing my POCKET as an ATM Machine, fire, fire. OYA START PRAYING! Dont forget to LIKE my facebook fanpage @ www.facebook.com/guvnasmookey for more jokes Least I forget, MY CONDOLENCE TO THE BARCA FAMILY
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Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 9:20am On May 01, 2013 |
I went to a cinema with Akpos, on getting to the cinema we saw a guy that barbed bololo (skin cut). I showed the guy to Akpos and said; "Look at fresh head, this one is good to slap, but i'm afraid of the guy's face". Akpos then said to me; "Max, you fear alot, i will slap that head and nothing will happen". I dared him to do it and he went to where the guy was sitting and gave him a HOT SLAP on his head. The guy was surprised, and wanted to react, then Akpos said; "Bros Max, so you are here, when we are looking for you at home". The guy said; "I'm not Bros Max, maybe we look alike", Akpos said maybe. After some minutes In the cinema, Akpos called me again and said; "Max, i will slap that guy again and nothing will happen". I said "ok". He went to the guy, gave him a hot slap and said; "Bros Max stop lying, i say na u be dis". The guy said to him angrily; "I'm not Bros Max, please, let me be". The guy then left that spot for us and went to the front seat. After some minutes Akpos called me and said; " Max, i will slap that guy again and nothing will happen". This time i told him that "if anything happens, i will pretend as if i don't know him". He stood up, went to the front seat, gave the guy a very hot slap and said; "Bros Max, so na here you dey, i come dey slap another person for back. Hahahaha... LIKE www.facebook.com/guvnasmookey 1 Like |
Jokes Etc / Re: Picture Of A Nairalander With Famous Artiste Wizkid by uprigtd: 6:54pm On Apr 26, 2013 |
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Dating And Meet-up Zone / Energetic Guys. Open For Info by uprigtd: 6:47pm On Apr 26, 2013 |
. Note: the LINK UP is thrice the speed of light and certain. |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 12:57pm On Feb 19, 2013 |
Three Nurses were in a Night shift when one of them realised that one of the Male patients was dead as she Was examining Him, she Noticed that He had a 'Hard On' she thought to Herself and said, 'Im soo Hot I cant let this go to Waste.! She Rushed and called the others.. She said, "I Cant let this go to waste!" she undressed and jumped on him,, and started enjoying herself.. After a while, the second Nurse pulled her out and said, "Its My time!" she Jumped on Him, and Started pumping Vigorously.. After a while of Enjoyment, the third nurse said to herself, "Am on my Periods, but He is dead anyway!'' she pulled Out the 2nd Nurse and Jumped On him... In the Middle of Her enjoyment, the 'dead' Man woke up! They got soo surprised and asked the man,"We thought you were Dead?" the Man said, "yeah I was, but with the repeated Pumping and Some Blood transfusion, I came Back to Life!" |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 11:26pm On Feb 07, 2013 |
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. " The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a Taxi driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years. Hahahaha! Like if you get the Joke 5 Likes |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 7:42am On Feb 05, 2013 |
ATTENTION MALI !!! Any attempt, attempted attempt, group of attempts, variable attempt, fixed attempt, debit or credit attempts to stop us from winning; 1. We would withdraw our troops from Mali. 2. You would pay us the 7 billion our govt spent on your war. 3. We would encourage the tuareg rebels to return. The ball is in your court, pass it to Emenike when d time koms. Una hear me so A word is enough for d wise... Heheheheheehehe hehehehee...... God don catch una today!!! Signed THE PRESIDENCY |
Sports / Re: Ivory Coast Vs Nigeria - AFCON 2013 - (1 - 2) - On 3rd February 2013 by uprigtd: 5:41pm On Feb 03, 2013 |
GGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOOAAAAALLLLL |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 10:32am On Feb 03, 2013 |
[color=#000099][/color] Akpos trying to avoid paying Doctor's fee after an eye operation, so he says," Doctor, I still can't see." The Doctor then asks a sexy young and beautiful Nurse to UnCloth in frontof him." He again says," I can't see!" Doctor tells the Nurse to open her legs. Again he says," Gai! Doctor I can't see!" Doctor says," you are an slowpoke, if you can't see how come your pr1ck dey rise? hehehehe 1 Like |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 6:25am On Jan 26, 2013 |
A man gets on a bus and sees a pretty young nun. He sits down next to her, and pleads with her: "You are so attractive and I must have sexx with you." ... "No," she replies, "I'm married to God." She stands up, and gets off at the next stop. The man is devastated. The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the man and says: "I can tell you how to get to make love with her!" "Yeah?", says the man. "Yeah!" say the bus driver. "She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray. So all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that glowing powder stuff in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be an Angel. "The man promises to give it a Try, and arrives at the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next Tuesday night. "I am an Angel," he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about His face. "God has directed me to make love with you." The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal s*x, as she is desperate not to lose her virginity. The man agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her. This was the best sexx he had ever had. After finishing, he jumps up and throws back his hood with a flourish. "Ha-ha," he laughed happily. "Surprise surprise, I am the man from the bus!" "Ha-ha," replied the nun. "Surprise surprise I am the bus driver and I am gay!!" #na so d quy take faint.....lol www.fabook.com/guvnasmookey 3 Likes |
Jokes Etc / Re: *~ Bunmioguns Voted Joke Section Poster Of 2012*~ Congratulations! by uprigtd: 7:21am On Dec 23, 2012 |
Mr DANI, Dont you think ONE of the GARRI GENERALs deserve to be nomInated? Those guys made my year! Btw: HOW DOES THIS LIST AFFECT THE PRICE of GAARRi? N.B: Pls dont ban me![color=#000099][/color] |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 5:36am On Dec 23, 2012 |
A set of 7 months old twin babies in the womb saw a d1cck comming towards them, the 1st baby said; "Daddy is comming to inside to play with us". The 2nd baby replied; Mumu; you no get sense! It's not Daddy, it's uncle. Daddy doesn't cover his face with a nylon when he wants to play with us. You will see, this one will not give us ice cream when he is leaving=))=)) 2 Likes |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 8:06pm On Dec 21, 2012 |
Sergeant Akpors a police officer arrested a man urinating at a place clearly marked "Do not urinate here, fine N500.'' The offender wanting to pay the fine, gives the Sergeant Akpors a N1000 note, The Sergeant Akpors turns around, fumbles a bit and says to the man, 'Oga now, piss again, I no get change...' 1 Like |
Nairaland / General / Re: Doomsday!!! The End Of The World, December 21st 2012 by uprigtd: 6:44am On Dec 21, 2012 |
The world is truly ending today o!!! In fact it is already ending here in BENIN, EDO STATE. Make una cee wetin happen now, now for UNIBEN . . . . . 1 Like
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Sports / Re: Mario Balotelli's Daughter Pia (Pictures) by uprigtd: 4:08pm On Dec 20, 2012 |
Abrantie:na wa |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 12:49pm On Dec 20, 2012 |
Hahahahahaha! I was a Candidate at a JAMB Examination. We were writing Use Of English. I shaded the ones i knew and was waiting for manner to fall from Heaven when i noticed a very beautiful girl sitting beside me. She was shading and was not looking up. Through the help of my long neck, i peeped and checked her work, she was in number 65, i was still in number 21 and time was running out. I quickly thanked God and started shading along with her. We got to number 98 together, suddenly, she looked up, caught me and shouted in a low tone; What are it? Why is you dey copying me? Copys! copys! You is not shaming! As big as you dey! You is a dull boys! You are a disgrace to your manhood. Na so i shout; heeeey! heeeeyyy!!! heeeyyyy!!! I am finished yay, who has eraser eeeehhhh!!!!!!!! Lol LIKE and COMMENT to encourage me please... 5 Likes
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Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 12:37pm On Dec 20, 2012 |
On Christmas, Santa will bring for : -Messi : A record book (so he can see which record to break) - Cristiano ronaldo : shampoo for his hair - Brazilian ronaldo : hamburgers - Balotelli : a brain - Nasri : A new bench - Ribery : A halloween mask ( so he can look more beautiful) - Van Persie : toys for the little boy inside him - Valdez : huge gloves (so he can stop some goals) - Sir Alex Fergunson : Pack of chewing-gums - Ozil : New glasses - Cisse : A physics book - Torress: A scoring Brain |
Politics / Re: FG To Conduct Census Of Jobless Nigerians In 2013... by uprigtd: 10:38am On Dec 20, 2012 |
rodeo0070: The Special Assistant to the President on Job Creation Initiatives, Josephine Washma, has hinted that the Federal Government intends to conduct a census of unemployed persons in the country early next year. Washma, who spoke to Daily Sun at an end of year dinner party, organized by the management of Premier Petroleum Company Limited, in Abuja, said the new survey, which will be carried out nationwide, will form the basis for the implementation of job creation initiatives of government.ok |
Celebrities / Re: Barbara Juliano Spent N14Million On A Handbag by uprigtd: 8:38am On Dec 19, 2012 |
mitchyy: GISTville |
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) / Re: Reading Vs Arsenal (2 - 5) On 17th December 2012 by uprigtd: 10:04pm On Dec 17, 2012 |
Its obvious ARSENAL is READING from a different script today. Keep Gervinho far from the team and we will win the match |
Celebrities / Re: What Is Wrong With These Photos Of Psquare? by uprigtd: 7:02pm On Dec 16, 2012 |
hmmmm.... Now i knw y dem Ghana chicks were fainting.... 1 Like |
Politics / Re: Kidnappers Demand Finance Minister's Resignation by uprigtd: 6:59am On Dec 14, 2012 |
Olumide wat u driving at? |
Politics / Kidnappers Demand Finance Minister's Resignation by uprigtd: 4:37pm On Dec 13, 2012 |
Eighty-three-year-old Kamene Okonjo was kidnapped Monday. It was also learnt that the kidnappers had also reduced their ransom from $ 1 billion to $ 1.26 million. A highly-placed security source told reporters that secret negotiation had commenced with the kidnappers because of the fragile health of the retired professor of Sociology and pressure from higher quarters. It was also learnt that the abductors are demanding the immediate resignation of Dr. Okonjo-Iweala as Finance Minister. This demand gives reason to suspect that the kidnap may be politically motivated. Delta State Commissioner of Police, Mr. Ikechukwu Aduba, in an interview on Wednesday in Asaba, after a meeting with his Divisional Police Officers, expressed confidence that the detained professor would be rescued soon. The CP said, "We are looking at the whole place because in any palace, there are supposed to be palace guards - that is local security before you talk of that of the police. "And so, we are looking at the obvious flaws and then, take the necessary action. We do not want to jump the gun. In the past, we have been able to rescue about 30 people without payment of ransom. "I am sure that the strategy we are putting in place will yield dividends. "We know that anything that has to do with kidnapping, there is always an insider factor. It has always been there, just like armed robbery." Aduba added that the police had extended their dragnet "within and without". A source said the kidnappers decided to delay contact with the Okonjo family as a result of heavy deployment of policemen, army and other security operatives around the palace and the community immediately after the kidnap On Wednesday, it was, however, observed that the heavy security presence in the last few days around the home of the Okonjos in Ogbe-Ofu quarters had been relaxed. But the policemen refused visitors access to the compound, saying, "No visitor is wanted here." Traditional chiefs that make up the Obi-in-Council met behind closed doors at the palace grounds in connection with the kidnap of the Obi's wife. Undercover security operatives flooded drinking joints, markets and public places in search of useful information. Sources told our correspondent on Wednesday that the investigators had also invited some domestic workers of the Okonjos for interrogation as it was believed that some of them might have connived with the kidnapppers to carry out the operation. Source: m.naij.com/news/16946.html |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 6:01am On Dec 13, 2012 |
::::::tenx pretiE::::: I THINK MOST NAIRALANDERS DONT THINK AM FUNNY : : : . : . : . . : . : : : : . : . . : . . : . : . . : : : : : : : : : : THATS IF THEY THINK ATAL |
Jokes Etc / Re: I Think Am Funny!!!! by uprigtd: 8:16pm On Dec 11, 2012 |
A wife was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband's key in the door. "Stay where you are," she said. "He's so drunk he won't even notice you'rein bed with me." Sure enough, the husband lurched into bed, a few minutes later, through a drunken haze, he saw six feet sticking out at the end of the bed. He turned to his wife : "Hey, there are six feet in this bed. There should only be four. What's going on ?" "Nonsense," said the wife,"You're so drunk you miscounted. Get out of bed and try again. You can see better from over there." The husband climbed out of bed and counted. "One, two, three, four. Damn, you're right!!!!! Click LIKE if you understand. 2 Likes |
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