₦airaland Forum

Hi, I feel u big time, u r rite to worry. I lost my Dog Dodi today and I am devastated. He was a cross alsatian/Bull dog, very active,healthy and never missed a vaccine. I always travel with him but somehow left him with my guard on friday cos It was a 10hr dr
ive. My maiguard called and gave me th
e exact described symptom by u here, and Dodi died before the vet doc got to him. Pls take care of urs fast.

You guys see this grin?
Ehen, we are back together again hotter than we were sef.
Wahala still dey sha. feelitx, Dfact, Sistawoman, ammape. where una dey o!!!!!

Ok i went outta circulation for a while after everything so i was just there one fateful evening counting the stars when i got a text saying dinner tomorrow? i replied i dont see why not. that was how we fell back into it. by dinner time he kainda drove home cos he closed be4 me, and told me to pick him up. i got to the house and anyway long and short of it was we never had that dinner, we just talked our hearts out. i dont remember how the table turned but he was the one apologising.

My boyfriend has always been a home guy, i trusted him a 100%. he now tells me his friends have introduced him to a couple of girls over our break, and that they even went out clubbing. he doesn't club on a reg day. he told me all the escapades they made him do all the things they said and how they tried to stop him even on the day he asked me out to dinner.he swore that he has not had sex with anyone. he says he has brough a girl back home one day but was turned off and never went all the way. (he has never lied to me). he says he loves me 10x's more that he did be4 and will never let me go again. i shunned him on my birthday and he still seems hurt by it cos he assumed i spent it with someone else. i shunned him cos he shunned me on his too. ( I WAS MISERABLE ON MY BDAY BUT I NEVA SAID SO)

Anyway now i am scared that he has proly kissed or smooched someone or even had sex but is ashamed to tell me. i cant get this scary sight/thought outta my mind. my trust has waned, i dont trust him anymore cos i see guilt in his eyes everytime i kiss him now, i saw a couple of changes in our bathroom and in his dressing, i am just not sure. he has asked me to go on another holiday with him a repeat of one we have had be4 in january, he wants to take me to tinapa for christmas etc. he seems to be trying too hard to make it up to me. i feel he has actually slept with someone, at least thats what my intuition tells me. wahala be say i dont 4give infidelity and i am scared that if i find out i will not be able to tolerate him. but if i keep quiet and he doesnt tell me. i will never trust him again. and you know how that is, there can't be a relationship without trust.

WHAT DO I DO? GUYTS TALK TO ME.

You are indeed gr8 feelitx, that was mature and consoling thanks.
Ammape, i dont want to love again at least not yet. when you say that it sounds creepy. too early to give up ok?
Dfact thank you too, my dear but i no fit call o! untill i am sure that my call will be answered or at least acknowledged. it will kill me all over again if he for example says ehen what do you want? not that he is that kind of person, but you know now anything can happen.

Thank you all.

DavidDylan in as much as i respect your analysis, you seem so damn cruel sometimes haba!

In answer to your last contribution, yes, he couldn't have slept at all, he said his cystolic was as it's highest that night i dropped off the things, and he suffered tremendously for days after that.

I have apologized, i have begged, i have cried all emotions for which i am not known for. I think he is gone. the calls stopped since monday i havent made any contact too.

Please i need you to understand that in as much as i am a temparemental person. what happened that day was still fuelled by him in a way. he kainda closed me out and i could not deal with it. since we practically lived for each other, i dont even know what came over me that day. is that in any case enuf reason to just stop feeling me unless he is just looking for an excuse. you cant even begin to imagine the strenght of the love we had. we were crazy about each other. how can one or two bad episodes affect us this much? i dont understand it. can you fall out of love this fast? and why wont he just say it's over instead of lets see how it goes?

Believe you me, that attitude is gone. Infact if i can just get him back, even the angels in heaven will be coming for advice.

Thank you all, wow help is still far away it seems.
I feel the people asking me to let go. right now that is my wish and i am trying very hard to let go but even the thot itself hurts.
He loves me i have never doubted this, he has never cheated on me, and he has never told me any of them big lies guys tell.

The mixed messages gives me the creeps, i need to know what is going through his head thats all.

I confuse him when we are together, i know he has feelings for me, and i can tell from the way he kisses me. I know my BF.

He is not letting me even try the letting go thingy cos he calls me at least 2x a day now since we spoke out our minds.

The reason why he gave me the 2 weeks break like i said before is that i displayed for him after a fight, the fight was because he was upset i returned everything he ever gave me during our relationship, dropped it on his front door and called him to come out and pick them after i have driven off. i was so angry i returned even his pictures. now he says that is me drawing the line cos i was trying to wipe him and every thing we ever shared out.

Well no sweat at the end of the day. whatever happens is what i will take.

Hi guys,
remember me? i was here with my axe and dagger a few weeks back. both of which I have re-treated and have found inner peace and let go of my anger. I think.
My BF and I finally sat down to have a heart to heart talk last week, after he gave me hell by ignoring me for 2 weeks, and i thought we came up with a resolution to the problem. we re-strutured a few things, i agreed to let go my rage and 'respect' him more and so on and so forth. Finally after much display of emotions, we agreed that i should give him till the weekend to get used to the idea of being back together so that routine can fall back into place. It didnt stop us from kissing as if it was the end of the world sha. he told me he loves me like crazy.

He suprised me by coming to my office on Friday, and trust me i took him behind and smooched the common sense outta him.
Now, last week ended yesterday, so i sent a message to say can baby come home now? below is the reply i got.

' hi baby, truth is i am honestly not sure anymore, i almost do not feel you anymore, sorry, i have tried working on myself but it's just not coming naturally. thats why i keep asking for time, i do not want to jump start it by us 'coming together' lets see how it goes'

My heart stopped beating for a while after that cos i was thinking so what the hell was the fretting all about? shouldnt this message have been passed the day we sat to chat, why did he come over? to give me a good bye kiss? i am completely confused. i sent a message saying 'thank you' and just backed off. i haven't called or texed after then and neither has he.

What do i do now? should i just lay low and keep my fingers crossed? or should i just move on even though i know it will probably almost kill me? is he looking for some sort of clue as to how i would react or what? right now i have no clues at all as what may be going through his fat head.

Guys i need your expertise here.

Tangent sorry o! put a leash on ur man,

Mad_Max, I dont know if it is ur presentation, subtlety, or seeming calmness that touched my cord, but you did indeed touch that cord.

Truth is i miss him like hell, But i am scared of the knowing the real truth, scared of the possibility of loosing him, i am scared of the future, but what scares me most is talking, getting past it and then having to waste another 2yrs having this same problem and stuck in this same position.

He has not used and dumped me, at least not yet. dissapointment / prolonging the pain scares the bejesus outta me.  

Am just looking for definates, not doubts. i want certainty and it's not coming from him, so i just thot hurt him so you can move on knowing there is no room for going back. Find a closure. come to think of it, if we were married and had issues will he be asking for space by closing me out? i am in a competition with his thoughts and they are getting more priority from him right now, since he has them constantly with him and i am here loning and angry as hell,

He just called sef, i couldnt bring myself to answer the call cos i dont know what the outcome of the space is. Dont wanna hear it's not working or we gotta break up, think i'll just wait till he sends a text msg to confirm why he is calling,

sexyLeamon:
girl you are depressed see a psychiatric for help
you are just blabbing and blabbing why do not you just forget him?

Thank you! and ur cynicism i can do without, you have nothing to offer and it's not by force to contribute so just buzz off ok?

Yimiton,
i will try, it's always been a difficult thing for me to be calm in circumstances that hurt. I just wanna vent out and get it over with. Hausa pple will refer to me as 'sha yanzu maganin yanzu' as in i expect immediate action/reaction. Yes i am bitter towards him, bitter at home, bitter at work. I need answers.

You know Yimiton that nite be4 he told me to give him space, i stormed the house saw his car parked and rang the bell. he came to the door and said to me that there was someone with him and that someone has locked him in and gone with the keys to buy something down the street, i answered i will wait, he says baby its too cold can you sit in the car? i said no. he said can i get you a blanket i said no. and just sat there for an hour, he was just going in and coming out. and saying please can we do this tomorrow? me tomorrow? My dear i was so certain that there was a girl in the house. na so i comot mat for my car come bunk there o!

Hmmn when it was almost midnite and he realised i wasnt gonna budge, he just came, opened the door and said to me it's not what you think. see as i stormed past him into the house, i was panting and running through every single room, bathroom plus cubicle and generator house sef. (he was following me around) and saying baby dont do this. after i don sure say hin dey alone, i made to run past him outta the house, i wanted to dissappear into thin air. He grabbed me from behind tried to hold me and says this is the exact kind of thing i am worried about. I just pulled myself off him, screaming i cant do this, and ran out to my car and drove off. me sef gan am embarrassed. But haba i would rather have caught him with a woman than know he is hiding from me.

its just too painful. and i swore from that day that i will never bring myself that low. I just miss him.

The silence will most certainly kill me be4 i kill him. so that's why i wanna kill him first.

Nellydee, more lite girl i think am gonna like you alot. i know every nook and cranny and habit and infact i know it all.

Kaysy, he is not my first love, i know love when i see love. He is just trapped in-between his former life and the promise of a future. i know he has doubts and that makes me mad too. he has gotten what he wants you say? by that meaning sex? nobody gets enuf of me on that trust me. Am not about money or sex, thats something anyone can get anywhere anytime if they want, there is more to life than sex and money. enjoy it but i dont live for it.

1one, you wan hear tory abi? ok dey wait.
LadyT am sure you feel me bigg time, sistawoman, thanks ko?

Sauron, na ur type me i dey find, let me catch you first then you go know say na afghanistan i dey.

Ok guys, am a bit better (i think). see ehn my own be say i cannot sleep with a problem on my chest. he on the other hand always takes calculated decisions, when i am ranting and raving he is holding and cooing, when i want an answer rite now he tells me only as much. that makes me mad. i feel like he thinks am a child sometimes. i hate the control he has over himself, i hate the maturity, i want my man to loose it just once so that i can tell he is human too.

Virtually Every single day for the last two years we spent 2gether, we eat together, we travel together, we shop together, he picks me up from work everyday. our lives revolved around each other. Now this man and i are from different parts of nigeria, different religion, i mean we are way apart but in my thinking if i am ready to take the leap of faith and damn the consequences, why the hell should he tell me to give him time to talk to his people again. That tripped me off. and for about 3 weeks after that, i became this very angry person. if he told me i love you a 100 x's a day as usual i was sure to throw in a very sarcastic remark, i was in essense trying to bark him into a corner. But na lie o! he just went mum and that was when he said he needs to clear his thoughts and i should just give him some space, to think about US? whateva that is!

Now out of pride i have not called him eversince, and believe you me i will die be4 i call. I just cant stop wondering if he will call ever.

I have always trusted him, but now not so much as i coulda pushed him onto something. (this is just my intuition talking) but i feel that he is talking or probably already finding solace somewhere else. if not how does he live without our routines when i can hardly concentrate on work.

Dats why i wanna kill him.

See ehn dont try to figure me out, even i dont understand my complexities. just talk to me.

DAPHOENIX, ROYCE,VANNESA,SESMAN,FEELITX,ROKIATU,

Thanks guys for ur words they kainda relieve the pain.
I am getting numbness in place of the rage now.

Am gonna get me so drunk and off to sleep. (after work of course). will give a situation report later.

If the rage comes back, you good guys have better be here to talk some sense into me like today.   appreciate it.

He is one lucky bastard.

NGKOLI,
Me kill myself why? what for? i will rather kill someone else.
If you were un-lucky in love for 10yrs or 10days it's not my issue. all i feel is my own 2yrs. it is he who wears the shoes that knows where it hurts.

DEARIEKAY,
You are indeed a dearie.

FEMMACE,
I wish i can do just that, my qualms is i have lied to my family and friends about this particular relationship, i cant even comprehend the lies but as i think of it i just know that i wanted to believe them. what i cant understand is the fact that they were even told in the first place.  Damn,
My family and friends i talk to about everything, now this bites more cos i dont want to hear you sef. 'Na wa o!' (i had given them an angels picture).
I am embarassed to tell the story. even i feel stupid now.


SHEYGIRL71,
Thanks girl.

NAUTILLIUS,
Nothing go happen am in my turf. i can pull strings.

ROKIATU,
Thanks. and YIMITON, Thanks too.

1ONE,
I dont know how you reached the qualifier that my life revolves around a Man. i havn't maimed be4, i wanna try, i will eventually go into another relationship, that doesnt mean this one isnt hurting me now. breath and move on yeah in good time, now it's time for that Pound of flesh for making me look and feel stupid.

DAPHOENIX,
Trust me on this, he aint sleeping like no baby.

MINUTE,
This pain is necessary, and thanks for the insult.

Give me a break??
Oh yeah right!!! everything is always the woman's fault.
My friend remove the log from your eyes before attempting to remove the spec from someone else's.

Who is the insatiable one here sef? you give them love they want respect, you give that they want submission, you give them submission they want kids, give them kids they want a mother, give them a mother they want youth and excitement and firm breasts back all over again, as if they make any effort except go to work come back, eat, critisize, watch TV, try sex and snore, try motherhood, submission, respect, cooking, cleaning too abi na one specie job?

Men are ALWAYs at fault in relationship breakups. they just dont try anything themselves but want you to be at their beck and call.

Irritated.

Hi guys,

I am angry, i am in a rage, and I am hurting so bad, why? cos I have been so so gullible.

My boyfriend stringed me along for 2years, and I just found out he has been telling me lies like forever.

I soooo, want to hurt him, i want to make life so miserable for him that next time he sees another chick with my name, he will take off.

My aim is not to get him back, hell I don’t even want him back. My aim is to inflict pain. cos i am tired of being the cheated one always. For once I wanna teach them bastards a lesson, a girl just can’t be real and expect the best outta life; they must find a way of making you look and feel so stupid.

Worst of all after all the wrongs the idiot did me; he had the audacity to tell me, he needs time to think about us. What the hell is US?

Am gonna get thugs to go rape him, beat him blue black, burn up his car and harass him every time he leaves the house.

I want him to have sleepless nights, and keep checking his back when he is walking on the streets. I wanna imprison him with fear.

Women always take the high way out by saying 'that's life' and it must go on, it's not the end of life and move on. Av done that one too many times in my life I wanna try something else for a change. Maybe if we all find a way of fighting back, the lies and takings for granted will stop. And they will learn to respect us as human beings with feelings too.

Hi,
Please help me with this VIN: jtmzd33v276022013.

Thanks,

Absolute/realfond.
The vin of your car is what we call Engine number.

Hi sly,
How you doing?
Please help me check this VIN- jtmzd33v276022013.

Thank you in anticipation for ur fast reply.

Good job too.

Take it from me it's not a crime. infact it's outrightly commendable.

Enjoy!!!!!!!!! and welcome to za club.

The topic is elaborate enuf, she was in love she's not anymore. must she write a book to pass her message across? everyone knows what happens in a relationship of 4years.

Halleberry, (some people are just outright irritants) never try to justify ur says. if they think you are doubtful about this cos he s broke let them. am sure inside of you, you know dats not true.

Now, if you don't feel him anymore, just take a walk cos u will never feel him no matter how hard you try.

I have been there before, i was in love with this guy who then was a prominent womaniser, i stood there day in day out and took all his shit. one day after a six years relationship i woke up and couldn't feel nothing for this guy, i fought it with all my will cos the guy had changed fully and was ready for the next level, he was in love with me more than ever and was dedicated to serving me. but despite all his effort i was just tired and had to walk out. cos i know deep in me i dont fel him anymore.

Nobody can explain why you fall in love, just like no one can explain why you fall out of.

so my advice is walk away, cos that thing in you won't click back in place, so jeje take a walk. and let him go find his love elsewhere.

Yeah just marry A

and keep screwing B.

Abi una no know say some sexual problems are irreversible?

What if she is naturally frigid? then you will still go back to B abi? so don't let B go jare, since ur libido is obviously high.

No be for teaching e dey o! u can know how to do tricks but can't add yourself sugar and flavour.

some chicks are just plain tasty and some bland. guys i lie just the truth.

Thanks guys you are all so helpful esp soccerquee, cuteass and co.

For those who think dat by telling me, he is taking his problems outside, you are wrong cos i know there are some issues you have to talk about or else you will just go mad. haba we are all human now, what should he have done? cry on her shoulder, when she is the same pers that hurt him? dont think so.

If he hadn't told me how would i have gotten such beautiful contributions to help me be a better adviser to him huh?

Seun, did you drink too much coffee when you implied he was having a problem by her being a sickler, tell me? who forced him? he courted, married and is been living with her for 7yrs, so why should that now become a problem?

I have a very good friend (male), who has been married for 7years just found out that his wife has been living with him under false pretences, she is SUPPOSED to have gotten her University degree long before they got married, but he just found out that she does not have a degree at all.

They have two beautiful kids, and what pains him is that he accepted her health status, and married her knowing fully well that she has sicle cell anaemia. and now this.

I would tell him to kick her sick arse to the curb, but emmm i am kainda sensitive on trust issues, and can be irrational.

so you tell me what to do. the guy can't sleep at night and am worried about him.

It is possible to be in love with 2 men.
I am in love with three. . and guess what i won't leave either for either and won't marry any of them i intend to fall in love with a fourth and a fifth and a sixth,

Axiomlogic:
Zarah,You could actually find quality certifed pre owned RAV in Lagos.There are lots of dealers that carry Rav4.You might be too busy to look around Lagos for 1 so I would advice you to check out www.autotraderng.com.It has a lot of cars listed on it and tons of resources like insurance and loan options.
Happy viewing

Thanks men, but they are always over priced.

Lovethis:
Zarah do you mean the Toyota Rav4?

Is there any other?

Hi,
i want a Rav4 2003 model full options. and i mean full options o!.
how much will that cost?

I always wonder why this kind of topic bugs women so much. I hear all sorts of bullshit like marriage is sacred and wat goes aroung comes around, and home wrecker, and she is hurting someone and things like dat.

It beats me why people think that i should give a damn about my lover's wife's feelings. I do not care about her, if her husband does, he should be in with her and not out with me, it's dat simple. If anyone is hurting her it is the man she married, we are both competing and the best wins simple.

You don't want me to date your husband? put a frigging leash on him. but why blame me? afterall at least it's a known fact that men do the chasing.

Anyone who wants to F, k my husband is free to, it's not like i will have him wear metal pants anyway, and it's better for him to go with someone he likes, than be stuck with me just because we said I DO"S, but is meanwhile in love with someone else. doh?

Let's try and understand that there is a difference between Love and Sex first.
Sex is physical (for most humans) and Love is emotional. me thinks yes o! you can be in love with someone and still screw someone else, no two ways bout it.

If there is milk and honey where you are, pls let it tell on you.
Who wants to marry a floor mopper, a gangster or a Scammer anyway?
Tell that to the host of abroad mongers who want to re-locate abegiiiiiiiii.

Myteax A point of correction I DO NOT LIE. I find your insinuation very offensive, and from the price you gave you obviously don't know wat model is called golf4 cos dats golf3 price.

Uche2nna I do not owe you an explanation.


Piddo Your info is first hand, and i can tell you dats a good buy. i priced same model from the guy who brought it in and he won't budge for a kobo below 1.6. and dats a 00 model and far below the one for 2mille which had less than 10k mileage when t'was bought, an 02/03 (it's an ALMOST new one) with full options very beautiful and highly tec, the car has a sensor that locks up it's whole system if you make the slightest mistake.

Lemmi add that it's a very difficult to maintain car. the slightest thing can cost you thousands of Naira.

Well let it be for those who are indeed thinking of it.
as for me I NO DO. Kapish.

Thinking of it alone gives me goose bumps. Can't imagine being with one person for better or worse, till death do us part. damnnnnnnnn  (it's so scary)