I wish I were a lady. So I could live my life by the rule 'If you have it then you can flaunt it.' Not minding if it has any significant impact on the lives of men who have been designed to be attracted to what they see. It is my life so I can live it the way I choose.

I wish I were a lady. So I could wear tight fitting pants with tops that barely go below my waistline. So I could show the world the curves of my hips and how good looking the shape of my legs are. It is not my business if I am too hot for you to handle. If I am too tempting for you, then take your eyes off of me.

I wish I were a lady. With well shaped breasts that can I display for the world to see. I just love what I see in the mirror with low neckline dresses that allows the top part of my breasts protrude out of the dress. God gave me this beauty. What is wrong with showing the world?

I wish I were a lady. So I could walk the streets during the day scantily clad. So I could show off all the beauty I have been endowed with, both in front and behind. I don’t care if later at night a hundred men are having sex with me in their imaginations. That’s their business. For all I care I am still a virgin.

I wish I were a lady. So I could go to church with sleeveless tops and well exposed cleavage. So when I lift up my holy hands, the sides of my breasts can be exposed for all to see. I’ll just be in the spirit and speak in tongues. I don’t care if the guy beside me has his tongue tied because of what he is seeing.

I wish I were a lady. So I can innocently dress seductively. So I can cause the heads of men with their wives in the car to turn around as they drive past me. It does not matter if that would lead to a serious one on one session between the man and his wife. After all, I was innocently dressed.

I wish I were a lady. So when I am in my boss’ office to drop the files on his desk, I’ll just bend a little bit more than is necessary. So he can have a glimpse of my round and full breasts. Who knows, what happens next might just earn me that promotion that I so desperately need. I’ve got to use what I have to get what I want. It’s an age old formula that always works.

I wish I were a lady. So when I come across a guy that I like I’ll just accidentally drop my pen. So as I bend to pick it up, he’ll get to see that my breasts are real and not padded. I’ll pretend I don’t know that as a lady I am supposed to bend with my knees and not my waist.

I wish I were a lady. So I could be on the pages and cover pages of magazines with revealing undies. It’s awesome to see all the camera lights flashing during the photo shoots. It feels good to be a superstar. It does not matter if any man tears off my picture from the magazine and pastes it on his wall so he can use it to fantasize about dirty things he wished he could do with me.

I wish I were a lady. So I could live life by the rule, 'If you have it then you can flaunt it.' It does not matter how many men end up in hell because I showed them a little bit more than they could handle. And what they did with the thoughts of that little extra sent them to hell.

But now I am a guy. So I guess I’ll just have to find a way to deal with all of these ‘nonsenses’ till my time on earth is over.

The one whom Jesus loves,
Mute Efe,
www.facebook.com/mutehimself
+234-803-874-9796 (SMS Only)

Lovely, thought provoking as usual.... I enjoy readin ur write ups, both here nd on facebook. Kip up d good work.

now i'm looking at my reflection and thinking,do i do all that? Half the time I wish I was a man. Great writing though!

A very constructive critisism!

gree-die:
Lovely, thought provoking as usual.... I enjoy readin ur write ups, both here nd on facebook. Kip up d good work.

Thanks, though I am like, "who exactly might this be on facebook?" Thanks all the same.

mute4real:
Thanks, though I am like, "who exactly might this be on facebook?" Thanks all the same.

dats d beauty of nairaland, operating behind a veil....

Vanity!!!

evalina: now i'm looking at my reflection and thinking,do i do all that? Half the time I wish I was a man. Great writing though!

If you don't, you're probably ugly...

I believe this is a good campaign against indecent dressing by our women. FCOL exposing yourself doesn't get you a good guy for those husband-hunting, it lands you with the player.

The title of this topic is grammatically wrong and I am disappointed in the moderator who allowed this post to cross front page without correcting the fatal error ... @poster next time try "i wish i were a woman" no fighting oh abeg naem i dey oh!

Lexo22: The title of this topic is grammatically wrong and I am disappointed in the moderator who allowed this post to cross front page without correcting the fatal error ... @poster next time try "i wish i were a woman" no fighting oh abeg naem i dey oh!

Noted!

You know rudeness doesn't get you you anywhere.

If you observe an error make it known constructively.

Now that you've corrected it yourself, has it not contributed to the learning process?

Some members have learnt the difference between "was" and "were", through your observation and that is commendable.

No one is above mistake, next time, I will look closely for errors like this.

God write up keep it up. I am happy am a lady

@OP,
The writing would be better if you replaced "lady" with "woman". Many nairalanders keep using that word "lady" as if it enhances the quality of writing. No, it diminishes it.

Vanity upon vanity; all is vanity!!!