Akin1212: I am so in love with a girl and we started dating over a year ago, it took six months for this girl to accept me. We met in school. This girl had a boyfriend she claimed they've been together for 7yrs. But before we started dating her parents forcefully dissolved the relationship because they don't want her with the guy for reasons best known to them. At the early stage of our relationship the girl usually picks the guy over me if i ask her some choice questions but that has changed now. So last year december when they met at home she said she made it clear to the guy that she has a new boyfriend cos the guy was always calling her although it was the guy that first dated after their separation. But the guy will not give up. To cut a long story short, recently the girl came visiting and before she got to my place she deleted all the messages the guy sent to her so i would not get mad at her, i knew so i asked her and she admitted. So one day the guy called her and asked where she was and my girlfriend said she went to see 'someone' i looked into her eyes and she said she went to see 'someone like that'. So i got mad and asked for a break up and she wept profusely i mean non stop that i can't do this to her. She said i should trust her that she has nothing to do with the guy. She said she doesn't know how to tell the guy that he should leave her alone because he has health issues. Then i collected the number and call the guy that he should stop disturbing my girlfriend that he is trying to break us apart. And he sent this message to my girlfriend 'can't imagine you doing this to me after all your promises when we both spoke last. Why did you have to give him my number, you know this is between me and you. You now put me back into another dillema abi? I just want you to know that i don't deserve this from you if you can still remember the past. Tell the guy that i will get back at him i promise. Good day'
this girl is a virgin and i feel like fighting this war to the end, as far as i'm concerned we love each other, we have done things together that she has never done before. I affect her positively and does the same to me. I don't want to leave her but i don't know what to do. Please advice me

Geeeez 6 months of constant legal stalking. Dude that's half a year you know?

She's not into you, she used you or using you to get over her ex and probably pitied you after the 6 months of hard labor.

Dust it off and move on. . . Can't u see you're the only one in da relationship? . Even during the so call relationship you were someone so now you must be somebody she used to know

Poster, it's good to know you are not in for games and you luv her for real.
I understand the situation can make her to be confuse especially if she is still very young
as in not that mature. I would say you keep being friends with her but don't assume it's a
fight between you and the other guy becos i know with time nature will take its place. when
everything must have calmed then it would be clear to her among the two of you whom she really
want to be with. for now just cool down, have a heart to heart talk with her without sentiment and
allow her to choose what is good for her. it's a matter of time every one will assume his or her position

frank3.16:
She is just a confused girl and obviously still loves the guy, u are just a second choice, the other guy already has a place in her heart.

This is my concern though: she lied to u. Can u trust her? She is still makin promises to the guy, while still with u.

I think ur confusion and jealousy is not helping u think straight. How long with u all continue in this love triangle? For this triangle to break, one person has to pull out. She is at the tip and holding the both of u at the bottom, but her grip is more on him. Can't u see he can't even go because she is not letting him go? U are just a pond in the chess game. The rest is urs to decide.

NB: why do u think she is still a virgin? I don't think she is though, I think sexx is their bond. Beside if u love her because of ur presumed sexualy status, then that's selfish, let her go.

Hmn! Correct.

Akin1212: i really appreciate your contribution, but trust issue is a big issue i trust her and that's the best thing to do if you want to get the truth. She is a virgin and that's not because she told me it's cos i know. And that's also not the reason i love her. But one thing is sure i'll get to the end and not letting her go cos i'll feel like a loser. Thank you frank

The why are you here on nairaland seeking advice? You seem to know what to do naaa.

Akin1212: Guys i thank you all for your contributions. She has taken a stand long before i posted this, and i understand the way you guys sees everything but please let's look at it from the other part atleast a coin has two sides. Fine i understand that she may still love the guy on one side on the other what if she doesn't? The promises the guy said in the text was just about talking to him normally because she doesn't. It pained me when she referred to me as someone like that, but she admitted she was wrong and for the yorubas i hope you still remember the saying....... Eni ti o bati mo ese re ni ese ko ni pe lori ikunle. Where did you guys put the forgiveness part.
For those that thinks i'm with her because she's a virgin, please don't be mistaken, i didn't know she was before i ask her out. And we're not together for sex that's why it's hard to leave. The guy usually tells her anytime she shuns him he ends up sick, why would she want to make him sick? But that is not enough reason to not take a stand. I 'm not a coward, i know how to be in charge and i am. You are not here when the whole saga happened although i appreciate your contributions but some talked as if they know her. Pls she's not promiscuous. She's just confused and it's on my part to understand. And if it fails i'll just learn from it.
Now 190 said something about guys like me being around, yeah and i'll be around for as long as i can. I believe in the cause of love and that's how it will stay.

I can see you are ignorant when it comes to women issues. I pity you because you shall be sorry.

Hopeless lover

Maria-G:
from your responses so far, it seems your mind is already made up on what to do.....you were just looking for someone who share same view with you,hence, your bringing it to NL....if you say you wana fight to the end, no worries man, its good to know you in control of everything.....if you loose the fight, you will gain knowledge. If you win, you will rejoice...... I dont see anything in taking risk sha....go on with your fight joor, wish you well.

thank you maria, nice one

Beync: Poster, it's good to know you are not in for games and you luv her for real.
I understand the situation can make her to be confuse especially if she is still very young
as in not that mature. I would say you keep being friends with her but don't assume it's a
fight between you and the other guy becos i know with time nature will take its place. when
everything must have calmed then it would be clear to her among the two of you whom she really
want to be with. for now just cool down, have a heart to heart talk with her without sentiment and
allow her to choose what is good for her. it's a matter of time every one will assume his or her position

you're on point on the maturity line, she'll be 20 next month
plus most of you just got this message wrongly. She thought it as nothing since they were not dating. You people should know they were separated. I think i'll just need to be the very understanding boyfriend. That's all. Thanks for your contributions @ all

Na u go decide; to be or not to be...trust is earned!!!

Akin1212: I am so in love with a girl and we started dating over a year ago, it took six months for this girl to accept me. We met in school. This girl had a boyfriend she claimed they've been together for 7yrs. But before we started dating her parents forcefully dissolved the relationship because they don't want her with the guy for reasons best known to them. At the early stage of our relationship the girl usually picks the guy over me if i ask her some choice questions but that has changed now. So last year december when they met at home she said she made it clear to the guy that she has a new boyfriend cos the guy was always calling her although it was the guy that first dated after their separation. But the guy will not give up. To cut a long story short, recently the girl came visiting and before she got to my place she deleted all the messages the guy sent to her so i would not get mad at her, i knew so i asked her and she admitted. So one day the guy called her and asked where she was and my girlfriend said she went to see 'someone' i looked into her eyes and she said she went to see 'someone like that'. So i got mad and asked for a break up and she wept profusely i mean non stop that i can't do this to her. She said i should trust her that she has nothing to do with the guy. She said she doesn't know how to tell the guy that he should leave her alone because he has health issues. Then i collected the number and call the guy that he should stop disturbing my girlfriend that he is trying to break us apart. And he sent this message to my girlfriend 'can't imagine you doing this to me after all your promises when we both spoke last. Why did you have to give him my number, you know this is between me and you. You now put me back into another dillema abi? I just want you to know that i don't deserve this from you if you can still remember the past. Tell the guy that i will get back at him i promise. Good day'
this girl is a virgin and i feel like fighting this war to the end, as far as i'm concerned we love each other, we have done things together that she has never done before. I affect her positively and does the same to me. I don't want to leave her but i don't know what to do. Please advice me

stop feeding your ego, some times you need to free matters like this and hope that the girl will love you based on what you'e done. when you start whining like this then you are insecure and an average frustrated chump.

Akin1212: Guys i thank you all for your contributions. She has taken a stand long before i posted this, and i understand the way you guys sees everything but please let's look at it from the other part atleast a coin has two sides. Fine i understand that she may still love the guy on one side on the other what if she doesn't? The promises the guy said in the text was just about talking to him normally because she doesn't. It pained me when she referred to me as someone like that, but she admitted she was wrong and for the yorubas i hope you still remember the saying....... Eni ti o bati mo ese re ni ese ko ni pe lori ikunle. Where did you guys put the forgiveness part.
For those that thinks i'm with her because she's a virgin, please don't be mistaken, i didn't know she was before i ask her out. And we're not together for sex that's why it's hard to leave. The guy usually tells her anytime she shuns him he ends up sick, why would she want to make him sick? But that is not enough reason to not take a stand. I 'm not a coward, i know how to be in charge and i am. You are not here when the whole saga happened although i appreciate your contributions but some talked as if they know her. Pls she's not promiscuous. She's just confused and it's on my part to understand. And if it fails i'll just learn from it.
Now 190 said something about guys like me being around, yeah and i'll be around for as long as i can. I believe in the cause of love and that's how it will stay.

hw swit

Akin1212: you're on point on the maturity line, she'll be 20 next month
plus most of you just got this message wrongly. She thought it as nothing since they were not dating. You people should know they were separated. I think i'll just need to be the very understanding boyfriend. That's all. Thanks for your contributions @ all

pls b undastandn.dnt push ha.jus b calm nd gentle 2wards ha bt nt timid.u guys musnt remember d oda guy.jus mk ha hapi,and try 2 mk ha 4get,reassure ha of ur lv,always b dere genuinely nd pls b mature.a bird always finds its way bk 2 its nest 2 rest,jus b a nest,a warm 1 nd she wuld cm around.dats al.u nid do she would chuz.i knw wat am sayn k..it workd on me ,.

dota: pls b undastandn.dnt push ha.jus b calm nd gentle 2wards ha bt nt timid.u guys musnt remember d oda guy.jus mk ha hapi,and try 2 mk ha 4get,reassure ha of ur lv,always b dere genuinely nd pls b mature.a bird always finds its way bk 2 its nest 2 rest,jus b a nest,a warm 1 nd she wuld cm around.dats al.u nid do she would chuz.i knw wat am sayn k..it workd on me ,.

thank you, you're very much appreciated

dota: pls b undastandn.dnt push ha.jus b calm nd gentle 2wards ha bt nt timid.u guys musnt remember d oda guy.jus mk ha hapi,and try 2 mk ha 4get,reassure ha of ur lv,always b dere genuinely nd pls b mature.a bird always finds its way bk 2 its nest 2 rest,jus b a nest,a warm 1 nd she wuld cm around.dats al.u nid do she would chuz.i knw wat am sayn k..it workd on me ,.

Story

If d OP wanna get her he shud invest 500K on her
I bet u in 2days she'l flee from dat ex of hers like satan himself

Onegai: She doesn't really like you. You're the guy around her helping her to heal over her ex. Women lose to possess things, there is NO way a woman who loves you will describe you as "someone like that". Women care when you change your fb status to "in a relationship", yet this girl is saying she went to see "someone" and "someone like that" after over a year of dating?! Your chances of getting hurt is steadily getting higher, and she'll probably move onto another guy. If she stays with you, it's not that she loves you, it's because she knows she has the upper hand. Tears come easy for 90% of women, shey you know? If you like, play a tight game and talk to her "like a man" or "beg", she'll stay for now. But remember, women can marry you and NOT love you and you will NEVER know. Though most likely in her case, she may end up with a new guy, not the ex (have seen your situation before, you may end up breaking up with her after wasting your time). Tell her to leave you and make up her mind, no contact for a month, and you, stop chasing waterfalls. And oh yeah, stop loving her virginity. Really. As a woman, it's an excellent tool for controlling men, because we know it trips guys. It doesn't make me a good person more than the next (I can show several virgins who will make your life hell, and several virgins who are sweet).

God bless you. You just gave me a new direction. Am greatful