Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,155,527 members, 7,826,980 topics. Date: Tuesday, 14 May 2024 at 02:06 AM

Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? (17298 Views)

Poll: If the wife is the breadwinner, is the husband still the "head"?

Yes: 75% (93 votes)
No: 24% (30 votes)
This poll has ended

Guy Brought His Oyinbo Wife Back Home & His Family Members Were Astonished -pics / Jobless Husband Beats Pregnant Wife Over Failure To Remit Monthly Salary / Beautiful Pictures Of A Nairalander And His Family (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply) (Go Down)

Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by efuah(f): 4:30pm On Jan 16, 2008
Is a man Always The Head Of The Family Even When He's Jobless/lazy?

There's this neighbour of ours whose husband is jobless, doesn't even go out to look for a job, the woman does everything, yet he's so bossy. He respects no decision of the woman, always making noise; am the head of this house/family and u must respect me, my decision stand, if i say no u must comply!! . . . inf act it pisses me off!

What ya think? is a man still the head of the family or house even when the lady is the breadwinner?
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by candies(f): 4:58pm On Jan 16, 2008
Inferiority complex is what the problem is with the man.
If he's trully the head of the home, he won't need to even say it.

To your question, if a man is responsible, even though he doesn't have a job, he's still the head of the home.
If he's lazy and irresponsible, he becomes the figure head of the home, because God in his infinite wisdom has designed it that way, we must be very careful before we make that all-important decision.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by barrduga: 5:00pm On Jan 16, 2008
if he has the tools down below (with the right size) then he is the head regardless of social status.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by efuah(f): 5:09pm On Jan 16, 2008
Thank you candies.

na wa 4u o barrduga tongue
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Busta(f): 6:04pm On Jan 16, 2008
In africa, he is the head - regardless!
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by tkb417(m): 6:10pm On Jan 16, 2008
Inferiority complex is what the problem is with the man.
If he's trully the head of the home, he won't need to even say it.

To your question, if a man is responsible, even though he doesn't have a job, he's still the head of the home.
If he's lazy and irresponsible, he becomes the figure head of the home, because God in his infinite wisdom has designed it that way, we must be very careful before we make that all-important decision.

excellent. . . no one will say this better.
Nice one coming from a lady.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by jintujinta(m): 6:28pm On Jan 16, 2008
Well, headship comes with its responsibilities. If a man claims to be the head, he should also shoulder some responsibilities. However, circumstances may force him to abandon some responsibilities for sometime but it shouldn't be for a long time. Also a man should show signs of seriousness and commitment to his home. He gives direction and leadership, so he can not afford to be lazy. So whoever must claim headship of a home must be responsible.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by koolsasy(f): 6:32pm On Jan 16, 2008
undecided undecided undecided :-x
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by oziomatv(m): 6:58pm On Jan 16, 2008
A joblessman,
low salary paid man,
recently lost his job,
business no more moving,
lost his capital in business or to fraudsters,


  any of the above you're a houseboy indirectly love no dey for this one.
         except she has never tested life before.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by tilewill(m): 7:40pm On Jan 16, 2008
hnmm, this isn't what any man should ever pray to
experience, coz once u did, it's likely one tastes every
other bitterness of life within dat short perioud.
here, you can't boast of any headship, u're reduced to
nothing. though, ur soulmate may endure to certain level,
but are we forgetful that women couldn't bear it all?
so easy for them to spit out all they've got inside once
you hurt their feelings.

ladies, my apology oh
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Bizl4Rizl(m): 7:43pm On Jan 16, 2008
The head is the HEAD. PERIOD!
If your head has a tumor or is injured or wateva it will always remain the head!
So the man is the head regardless of social or economic position

1 Like

Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by spora(m): 8:06pm On Jan 16, 2008
I Timothy 5:8- "If any man does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his own family, he has disowned the faith and is worse than an infidel"

There is more to manhood and fatherhood than siring children. Any beast can do that!

Manhood, fatherhood is assuming all the responsibilities of a household. It is providing for, protecting, disciplining, and training a family for the glory of God.

If a man turns over to his wife the responsibilities of providing for his family, he has gone against the law (if he is a Xtian, anyway) and therefore cannot claim any headship.

The rule of law and due process grin must be followed (nija and grammar). So he is not the head but the a*^e cheesy and he should drop trousers immediately and shop for more buba and iro (a la Alamieyeseigha) wink

1 Like

Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by nigeria1: 8:36pm On Jan 16, 2008
spora (m) , stay lagos and dey talk out of point. In the USA,  Most women are the bread winner in Black home,  Because the Black man can't find Job, USA business would rather employ a black woman over a black man,  No matter the man qualification,   That is Why Obama looks like a big story on CNN. Look a black man in USA is a door mat of the system. Do you know  there are 16 women in the USA senate,  and only 1 black man in the USA senate,  Go and find out how many Black graduate the USA has. It is called a system,  Why do you think most Nigeria men Leave their wife out here and run back to Nigeria?? it is called the system,    I had a friend over here with a PHD, after this my friend collect welfare with is North America Phd finished ,  He is now teaching at the University in Africa.  My Phd friend was not a lazy man, i went to school with him, so i know. It is just the system. North America treat black men like piece of shit,   16 women to 1 black man in the USA senate,  You heard what Bill clinton said about Obama, that he is only dreaming or joking , he was only dreaming that he would not be president. Clinton was telling the truth. He knows the system,  That Obama is just a common Black man. In the USA scale system a black man come last after everybody. You are talking about a North American system that does not treat black as first class citizen.


The who ask the question,  You most really be lacking in understanding.  because you get one small job , paying cedi, you think you are God,  I pray that from today , that man that you want to make your footmat,  that God would lift him,  And we would see how you end up.

You see I see arrogant people like you everyday. I just finished dealing with one someday ago. Go and  check yourself.

brother spora, f this men are what you call them,  then let this women go and pay the bills and go suffer well well,   been single women. Do you know the number of single women that would quickly take the man,  Woman carry the children and go through the suffering of taken care of the bill and see where your children would end up,  like the rest on the street.


Nigeria ONE.com
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by sagitarius(m): 9:12pm On Jan 16, 2008
Well, i wuldnt want 2 say he's not the head simply becos he cannot provide 4 his family. It has been pre-destined 4 a man 2 be d head of d household.several thins count b4 being d head, such as security. In my own opinion, he still remains d head. he doesn't need 2 argue dat with anyone, i think he's just afraid of loosin dat position (or inferiority complex as someone suggested earlier on). undecided
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Nobody: 9:14pm On Jan 16, 2008
I still don't understand what this head of a family is all about: your sex doesn't make you a leader. I can imagine why many women are suffering all over the world: some psychos have claimed roles that don't belong to them.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by hbrednic: 9:16pm On Jan 16, 2008
efuah:

Is a man Always The Head Of The Family Even When He's Jobless/lazy?

There's this neighbour of ours whose husband is jobless, doesn't even go out to look for a job, the woman does everything, yet he's so bossy. He respects no decision of the woman, always making noise; am the head of this house/family and u must respect me, my decision stand, if i say no u must comply!! . . . inf act it pisses me off!

What ya think? is a man still the head of the family or house even when the lady is the breadwinner?

why sticking your nose into your neighbours house,(AMEBO OF THE 1ST ORDER)?
[b]it pisses you off[/b]why not mind your own business ,instead of involving yourself in the internal affairs of another family.
always stay clear on issues that involves husband and wife,if not with time you will become there worst enemy.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by oziomatv(m): 9:17pm On Jan 16, 2008
A man can fall ten thousand times and arises ten milion times
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Daman1(m): 9:24pm On Jan 16, 2008
Hey,
It is an agelong truth that the man is head of the family, no strings attached. Any other thing is an aberration.
My candid wish for all men in the house is that may we have some dough (however little) to be able to actually be the head in our homes. Of what essence is an husband/father who doesn't fulfill his obligations financially at home, it automatically affects his morale and social carriage and this will invariably come to bear on the children as well as the couple's sex life
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Nobody: 10:14pm On Jan 16, 2008
michelin89:

I still don't understand what this head of a family is all about: your sex doesn't make you a leader. I can imagine why many women are suffering all over the world: some psychos have claimed roles that don't belong to them.

This not about claiming roles my dear, the one that design the universe that we all find ourself design it so and if you have any problem with that well u know what to do  grin

For me sha am a pure African man to the core, i see it as my God given duty to be in charge, but NOT like being lazy, irresponsible and disrespectful to my wife.

@poster
Haba, ki le wa dele onile, whatyour biz with other pples home. Abi are u the one?
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by vassilli(m): 10:26pm On Jan 16, 2008
Efuah, u wey start this topic
u b olofofo
na aproko go kill u
wetin b ur biz with ur neighbor husband matter
abi u like the jobless guy?
repent o
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by same410(m): 10:31pm On Jan 16, 2008
What do you mean by joblessness? We leave in a world where things happen. A man could loose his job due to fault not from him. We are no longer in an agrarian society where man must have work to do. If a man is not lying low with his state of joblessness, then we can not qualify him with the biblical assertion.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Nobody: 10:32pm On Jan 16, 2008
babree:

This not about claiming roles my dear, the one that design the universe that we all find ourself design it so and if you have any problem with that well u know what to do grin

For me sha am a pure African man to the core, i see it as my God given duty to be in charge, but NOT like being lazy, irresponsible and disrespectful to my wife.

@poster
Haba, ki le wa dele onile, whatyour biz with other pples home. Abi are u the one?


Who is this god?
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by TheSly: 10:37pm On Jan 16, 2008
the head can never be the tail. . . . . thats for sure cool
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by hotfunmi(f): 10:44pm On Jan 16, 2008
God ordained men to be head if households and when HE did it, he did not say 'unless he has no job or incapable. God's word is true and I think this mentality is why our homes are breaking everyday. DO NOT LET THE DEVIL GUIDE YOU INTO FALSEHOOD for the end thereof IS DEATH.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by adeboo(f): 10:46pm On Jan 16, 2008
In our culture for sure, the head of the house that cant provide for his family is definitely less than a man - and in that issue he can never be the head of the home.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by ell77(f): 10:50pm On Jan 16, 2008
Figurehead? yes I guess so. Real head? NO!

If the man lost his job through no fault of his own and was trying to get back or was disabled or something the fine, circumstances caused it and i can accept him still calling himself the head.

But if it is ordinary laziness then no way! Do you mean I should work, come home, cook, clean, supervise the children, answer you every beck and call whilst you have not moved from you position for two days and you have the audacity to call yourself the HEAD! Head of what exactly.

The head of the family has rights and responsibilities
RESPONSIBILITIES:
-They are the moral compass (how morally correct is it to treat your wife badly and allow her to stress herself without caring to help - selfishness),
-They are providers (he is not providing cash, food, shelter, clean water, education)
-They are role models (sure if you want you child to grow up lazy, if you ask your sons to study they will soon say "why, did daddy need to study for the job he is doing?"wink
-They are protectors (how can he protect his wife when he is the main contributor to her ill health - giving her hypertension)
-They care about their wife's emotional and physical welfar (if he cared so much he would atleast atempt to find work)

RIGHTS:
-Decision makers
-you know the rest

If the woman is doing all this, then as far as I am concerned she is the real head of the family and deserves to make decisions, afterall, the children need to know her example is th best example of what a parent and spouse should do and not his.

If people want to fight for this 'head of the family' status they must know there are no rights in life without responsibilities unless the person is a thief!

1 Like

Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by hotfunmi(f): 11:42pm On Jan 16, 2008
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family?
« #16 on(Oziomatv)
--------------
A man can fall ten thousand times and arises ten milion times

Report to moderator Logged

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
to be a man is not a day

Does this rule also apply in Nigeria?
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by gentlegg(m): 11:59pm On Jan 16, 2008
n our culture for sure, the head of the house that can't provide for his family is definitely less than a man - and in that issue he can never be the head of the home.[b][/b]

@Adeboo
Your statement pisses me off. I know u arrogently make that statement just beacause ur an ordinary She.

Yes the Bible said that a man that cannot provide for his family is worst that an infidel (unbeliever). Mind you all, the Bible did not say that he is less that a man or is no longer the head of his family. I think this statement in the Bible is meant to challenge men to sit up for their responsibility and not as a yardstick to measure if they are still head of their family or not.

My question is, does the woman providing for the family due to the man's financial incapabilty now makes the woman the head of the family? If any woman think so, let her stay single, find any tout in the parks to impregnant her, raise children alone with her financial prowess, then come back and tell us her story.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by seablu(f): 12:04am On Jan 17, 2008
if he makes effort to find a job, then he might still get the headship back. if not he is just the arse and not the head of the family. cos for real, even if the woman-breadwinner tries to avoid it, with time her respect for her man will be affected negatively
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by hotfunmi(f): 12:21am On Jan 17, 2008
@Seablu, when God pronounced men as the head, he didn't add any financial clause to it.

'for you shall know the truth and only the the truth shall set u free'(john 8:32)
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by Nobody: 12:24am On Jan 17, 2008
hotfunmi:

@Seablu, when God pronounced men as the head, he didn't add any financial clause to it.

God bless you for that fantastic insight.
Re: Is A Jobless Man The Head Of His Family? by nigeria1: 12:41am On Jan 17, 2008
Nigeria ONE.com


Why do you think most black men in North America are married to white women,  because of altitude like this lady. And you complain you have no husband. If you see how white women treat their husband,  even if they do not have. all the NBA player 90% have white wife,  why?? because they see how their black mother treat their black father,  so they end up with white lady to get better treatment.

Over here if your wife pack her load, you go happy, because you go see better woman. Tell this lady to go,  Which go see bread winner for another place with blow like tyson.


Nigeria ONE.com

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply)

Should A Married Woman Accept A Gift From Her Ex Boyfriend? / Would You As Husband Relocate If Your Wife Gets A Job That Is Far Away? / Whyme222's Wife's Response....nairalanders Be The Judge

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 67
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.