Arriving late

ASA.
@ Modalayo, welcome to the thread! I pray ALLAH answers all our prayers!

@ coco diva, why did your dr change your protocol in the middle of down regulating? Were you not responding well to buserelin? With some people it's better to just go on short protocol. FF female factor.

It's also important to be on supplements whilst we are waiting be it natural or tx wise.

Have a nice weekend sisters!

Also welcome Jarus, saw your reality show on the family thread. How is the family?

Salam alaykum my sisters,
I read the pastor Vic posts on TTC and I couldnt help laughing. Subhanallah! Nothing we wont see while TTC. Whatever it is that will make us commit shirk, I pray Allah does not send it to us. Amin. Thats the prayer my dad always does for me cos he knows how tempting quick fixes are.
Hope everyone is doing well. Our tears will be tears of unimaginable joy very soon, Amin.

Beloved1993: Our tears will be tears of unimaginable joy very soon, Amin.

Amin

Beetle: Also welcome Jarus, saw your reality show on the family thread. How is the family?

Alhamdulilah

I'm reporting here late, but masha Allah, will contribute my little.

This was my wife's worst fears too when we married. I don't know, but probably because of experience of a couple of people she knew.

She dreaded experiencing ttc and was somehow troubled. Her own case was miscarriage actually, but she was thinking it could lead to issue with conception. When she experienced 2nd mc, she made a statement like 'but we worship God now'. I was very furious st her that day, and told her, we married less than a year ago, what does she want people that had married for 10 years and did not even conceive not to talk of experiencing miscarriage to do. What's the big deal in our worship, we do 5 daily salats, and occasional tahajjud, and being an ahlus sunnah, even if funky one, I enforce some sunnah in my household (e.g, no picture hanging, no deliberate music, everyone must have hisnul Muslim, and I try to encourage sunnah practices like always correcting them when they enter toilet with right leg first, wear cloth with left hand first, eat with left hand etc), encourages reciting adhkars before going to bed etc.

She found this quite strange initially, but she coped, especially since she was seeing the benefit too. For instance, there was a guy that really disturbed her and competed with me to have her hands in marriage(my wife is, in all modesty, a queen, very beautiful. Lol). In our first few weeks of marriage, the guy, obviously having consulted herbalist or some deviant alfa, threatened her in her dreams and in real life by sms. In fact, in her first miscarriage, she saw in dream a woman that cut her stomach, and brought out her baby, and woke up to see blood, and experienced miscarriage, losing that pregnancy. Plus a couple of other eierd dreams.

Being an ahlus sunnah by Islamic creed (never mind my funkiness), I' m not usually ruffled by such things. After all, nothing happens except by Allah's permission. I told her to relax, that no problem. That was why she uttered that statement that, but we worshipped God now, after the second mc. I was mad st her, and asked her, what exactly has she seen compared to millions of people out there that are even better worshippers than us. Just 5 salats and enforcement of very few sunnah practices is no big deal. In fact, I'm one of the laziest in terms of ibaadah, compared to my MSSN ife friends. I dont consider myself strong in worship at all, yet this little we do is seen by my wife as strong worship that should insulate US from trial and almost questioning God for such little misfortune of mc. After all, the best of mankind, the Prophet, lost children, I told her. Who worshipped God more than him. I was mad that day.

In any case, after she became used to the adhkars and sleeping etiquette, the evil dreams part subsided. For example, there was another attempt on her in dream, but the subdued her chaser in dream this time around. She is probably more conscious of adhkars than me today.

I understand her initial fears.

1, we were raised in environment where people believe so much in fetish practices. That was why it appeared so strange to my wife that, without consulting any alfa or mixing or tying some papers, I sounded so confident and kept reassuring her that no problem, despite the real threats she went through. It is simple: threats of evil forces are temporary and fighting evil with evil aggravates the problem, nothing happens except by Allah's leave and more power is greater than Allah's, so why not rely on Allah and do your best within sunnah-compliant permissible ways of fortification. In any case, I set a rule in my marriage that if I see any fetish thing in my house, that is the end of that marriage.

2, our environment is such that family members instil fears in women by all manner of gossips, sometimes to their face. People count months and years for ttc. My wife was sad when after 1 year, no pregnancy. But I told her, at least she was getting pregnant, only losing it. After all some people dOnt even conceive at all. She was afraid my parents can ask me to get another wife and things like that. I kept assuring her nobody dare tell me that. I still wonder what the big deal was, this was just first year if marriage for Gods

I was wondering what the big deal was, for God's sake. This marriage was less than 2 years old for God's sake. Well, we welcomed our baby by the end of second year.


Now to the ttc, my candid advice is to remain patient and trust in God. There is nothing anybody can do to it. Do the normal medical tests time confirm if anything is biologically wrong.

Worship, to me, should not be based in worldly returns. Worship should be driven by obedience to Allah's command and unthinkability of losing the Hereafter which is infinite, compared to a finite world here. Do all you can within permissible ways, medically and Islamically. Prey hard, during good times like midnight. If you are able to conceive, alhamdulilah. If it doesn't turn out, glory still be to Allah. It doesn't reduce Allah's power. The prophet, the best of us, lost children.

Losing hereafter because of trying to get something in this world is the worst. Unfortunately, many of our people fall for this, some for things as ridiculous as looking for job or money.

Our prayers are with you, and insha Allah, you will reap the fruit in this world and Hereafter.

I was wondering what the big deal was, for God's sake. This marriage was less than 2 years old for God's sake. Well, we welcomed our baby by the end of second year.


Now to the ttc, my candid advice is to remain patient and trust in God. There is nothing anybody can do to it. Do the normal medical tests time confirm if anything is biologically wrong.

Worship, to me, should not be based in worldly returns. Worship should be driven by obedience to Allah's command and unthinkability of losing the Hereafter which is infinite, compared to a finite world here. Do all you can within permissible ways, medically and Islamically. Prey hard, during good times like midnight. If you are able to conceive, alhamdulilah. If it doesn't turn out, glory still be to Allah. It doesn't reduce Allah's power. The prophet, the best of us, lost children.

Losing hereafter because of trying to get something in this world is the worst. Unfortunately, many of our people fall for this, some for things as ridiculous as looking for job or money.

Our prayers are with you, and insha Allah, you will reap the fruit in this world and Hereafter.

Asalam alykum All.May Allah bestow On Us His mercy and grant us our heart desires-Amin.ok now I get the FF.
Welcoming all the new posters in the house@Jarus,thanx for sharing your journey its an inspiring one.@beloved,phwme.May Allah accept our prayers.

Wow @ jarus...thanks for sharing ur story. So inspiring!! U remind me so much of my husband. He is my pillar,and when am deviating put me on track by reminding of d numerous favours of Allah. May Allah bless all our good husbands. Amin. Ur story is an eye opener. @ Beloved...yaay!! Happy to read from u. Your tot crossed my mind ysday and I said today I'll post ere n ask after u..Alhamdulillah u r ok. @ all...patience and perseverance is d key word. Its nt easy bt let's try n have dat virtue. Allah is a perfect God and He knws wats best for us,let's put our whole trust in Him. Enjoy ur weekend. Ma salam!

SSWW, Our lord ! Make us not a trial for those who disbelieve, and forgive us our sins. Verily You are the Mighty and the Wise. Soon, We shall all share our good news By Allah's grace amin

@jarus,thanks for sharing that with us.May Allah bless you and your family.jazakumu lahu khayran.Du'a is a form of worship.Allah,all Glory and Praise be to Him has said'Verily,your Lord has said:Call upon Me,and I will answer you!.Those who are arrogant to worship Allah will enter Hell,humiliated![surah Ghafir vs 60].@beloved1993,may Allah protect us from shirk.@coco diva,may Allah grant you a pious offspring through it.may Allah bless everyone of us with pious offspring soonest.

Assalam alaykum my sisters,sorry av been MIA this couple of weeks, yes we had our second ivf attempt last month and it ended again in bfn and this really affected dh nd I emotionally as despite all our effort this time its still turn out negative and as if that is not enough when we went back to see our RE,for post treatment consultation, so he said he discovered i av hydrosalpinx,that he dosnt just want to make me feel sad bfor, nd this was the worst of it all as he said i need to av the tube remove because he thinks my chances re now very slim hmmmm,my sisters its not been easy since then,infact dh is not happy about the situation nd am so scared now,though av leave everything to Allah as he alone can do it nd we re still planning on what to do about the hydro,as it is now, we're not looking forward to any cycle as we have exhausted all our savings,my sisters its not really been easy but what ever the situation i still thank Allah for my life.may Allah bless us all with pious children.

@coco diva thanks sis for asking after me nd i pray this ur cycle will be a perfect one inshah Allah

@amaturahman may allah make dis cycle a perfect one for u.

@jarus thanks so much for ur post is so inspiring,by the way av u guys ended the family reality show i always love it its inpiring.regards to the family.

@to all my sisters zeezy,venus,rainyday,amazeballs,beloved1993,safe06,koreye,phewme,beetle,modalayo nd the rest of us, i pray that Allah accept all our ibadahs and we shall all smile very soon.

@nd to all our brothers nd sisters in islam who always come here to pray for us,may Allah reward u all abundantly amin.

@abibyy,dear sis,I know how u feel,pls just take it one day at a time,there's a reason for everytin,may Allah ease ur pain and grant ur dua'as,amin

@abibyy, u need to sue the dr. He knew you had H and still went ahead and did ET when he knew the embryos would be poisoned. You need to go back to him armed with questions. I'm about to sleep but will post more in the morn IA

@Abibyy,so sorry about this. God will grant u your heart desires sooner than you think. Don't worry, everything will be fine IA.

@beetle,you have just raised very good point,som of these doctors just take advantage of d situation,its very rare to find a truly compassionate one,what most of them are after is just d pay.
Atleast in such situation everthing should be done thoroughly.it is dt firm believe dt only Allah gives dt consoles,and keep us moving,@abibyy may Allah ease ur path,amin

Subhanallah. Abibby I'm so sorry. Can't imagine what you are going through. Your Dr should have told you, ivf is not small money and every little detail should be looked at.
Allah will answer your prayers the way you don't expect, be strong

My fabulous sisters,asalam alykum wa rahmatulah.How are we all doing.Hope we are all enjoying the weekend.May Allah bestow on us His mercy-amin.
@Abibby,I feel your pain.((Kisses and hugs))The doctor was very unproffessional and insensitive.He should have laid all the details out for you before the IVF.Not just to have allowed you go ahead and come out with a BFN.But above all,don't despair,there is nothing difficult for Allah to do cos He is not bound by scientific explanations.He only says BE and it is.Hydrosalpinx is not something that cannot be resolved so don't feel too bad.pls cheer up . it may set u back a little bit but you'l overcome.but just relax,do your research and consult with another doctor to seek a way forward.Allah'l make you victorious-amin.much love
@Zeezy ,Abibby, and all.Amin to the prayers.@AmatuRahman,how are you doing.you'r in my prayers.
May Allah grant us our heart desires soon

[color=#990000][/color]abibby,I won't say sorry coz I believe almighty Allah has greater plans for u my dear,plz be strong. If u wnt mind,can u tell us d hospital u did ur procedure?
@all,greetings to all.

Thanks my sisters so happy i have u ppl to encourage and cheer me up, though he actually told us after the ET which is still too late then and he never even see it as anything serious then until we had d bfn then he started telling me all the disadvantage of the hydro on ivf,we have also plan to see another doctor in nigeria but the thing is i still have some frozen embros with him so we're at a crossroad now,but in any case we still going to sought out the hydro first,but my fear now is the psycological effect of not having a tube as this is the reason why i still have hope naturally,and ones its removed that will be the end of trying naturally and the doctor said if we dont remove it,it will get blocked again and that will be going from one operation to the other, as this will be my third operation since we started this ttc journey almost five yrs ago,am so confused now. though for now am taking a break from ttc so as to relax my body and soul.may Allah see us all through this ttc journey and reward us with pious children amin.

Asalamu alaykum sis and Umm,may Allah make our affair easy,its not a nice experience at all,you feel empty,i waited too for a year until Allah grants me a very beautiful baby girl,and inshaAllah another on the way.Don't loose hope,keep praying and giving alms/sadaq
a.

but sis are not to see male doctors except on emergency/life threatning.

asalam alaikum waramatullahi wabarakatuh,
@ abibyy it is well my dear sister, God is in total control of all our affairs and  pray He will do the best for all of us.
@ coco diva my dear sister thank you so much for your concern.  just started stimming yesterday.  pray almighty Allah grant us ɑ̤̥̈̊ll ɑ̤̥̈̊ BFP this cycle either we're trying naturally,through iui,through ivf or through icsi. Amina Ya Allah.

salam my lovely ummus,@abibyy,taking a break is quite nourishing,may Allah direct u as regards d next step,i strongly believe in miracles, i pray that Allah surprises u with a sound BFP and a gentle ride for nine months resulting into cute bambinos,like these.......ameeeeeeeeeeeeeeen

@july16th,onono planet(umm quads),atiyal,koreye,i hope u guys a doing fine,may allah make d way easy for us all,ameen.
we went for our review and the next step is to do a endometrial scratching procedure to aid implantation by d next cycle insha Allah.she said we could try again in june,but i just want rest my body and get my soul nourished,soooo looking forward to ramadhan,may Allah make d way easy for us all.pls lets not forget to always rekindle our iman by doing acts of ibadah,......we are almost there insha Allah

@tanx amazeballs u've realy made my day with dis beautiful babies may Allah make it easy for us all.jazakallahu khairan.

@abibyy, I read your post and I was wondering "how cruel" on a second taught, may be he was hoping for a miracle, the way I wanted to hope in Allah for a miracle when I asked my Dr. I should proceed on d dAy I was to start stimming know my uterine linning was not building. But he told me its risky that I shuold take a month to build endo.@abibyy I pray Allah in his infinite mercy will guide and direct you on your next step.
@cocodiva,its for the best, hopefully june is when I will comence my new cycle.
@AmatuRahman I pray those eggs grow well. Hope you are eating healthy.
@Amaze ball can u give more explanation on this endo scratching.
May Allah bless us all in due time. Amin

[quote author=abibyy]Assalam alaykum my sisters,sorry av been MIA this couple of weeks, yes we had our second ivf attempt last month and it ended again in bfn and this really affected dh nd I emotionally as despite all our effort this time its still turn out negative and as if that is not enough when we went back to see our RE,for post treatment consultation, so he said he discovered i av hydrosalpinx,that he dosnt just want to make me feel sad bfor, nd this was the worst of it all as he said i need to av the tube remove because he thinks my chances re now very slim hmmmm,my sisters its not been easy since then,infact dh is not happy about the situation nd am so scared now,though av leave everything to Allah as he alone can do it nd we re still planning on what to do about the hydro,as it is now, we're not looking forward to any cycle as we have exhausted all our savings,my sisters its not really been easy but what ever the situation i still thank Allah for my life.may Allah bless us all with pious children.
@abibbyMay Allah replenish your pocket.May He in His infinite mercy make a way for you out of all these,guide you,ease your affairs and grant you a pious child.May He grant you and your DH comfort in each others eyes.may He increase the love btw you and put laughter and happiness in your home,life.My dear sister,i will urge you to seek a second opinion about the hydrosalphinx issue.May Allah have mercy upon us.Aslmn alykm.

@zeezy tanx sister for these prayer u've showered on me,yes we're having a second thought about the hydro,thank God we will be taking few months break bfor the operation which i might have meet with the consultant to discuss other option.may Allah accept all our prayers amin.

@vennus u're right my sister he was actually hoping for miracle .Allah knows best nd he alone can make it work,the doctor re also only trying their best,there is a lady that even got pregnant even with the hydro, may Allah bless us all with beautiful kids soon.i pray Allah make ur cycle a perfect one.

@venus,it's a mini procedure usually done after a failed cycle, a little scratch or scar is made around d uterus,its creates internal bleeding,so as to increase blood flow to d uterus,to aid implantation of d embies,i think it's one of those things d doc just want us to know dt she is doing something different,for us to have renewed hope in d process or protocols(i might be wrong)well she said it's done during d cycle before stimms.
i have checked dr google,from what i read, it could be an added advantage(by Allah's will)
baby dust to my wonderful sisters