ileobatojo:

I'm interested to hear, for practical purposes, how one can inexpensively verify this without appearing like a desperate nutjob. I mean in the very beginning not after a relationship has started forming.

Facebook? Meet a number of his friends? Or do ladies jump into relationships these days without finding out anything about the person they intend to make their boyfriends?

I've never been in a situation where a married man claims to be single so maybe I'm naive but I don't know that it would be so easy unless you happen perchance to know many people from his social circle or you have caught him in a string of lies (which again doesn't happen overnight).

You do the basics - you get to know the person in their social setting before getting into a relationship. That's what I consider normal, but then again, maybe what I consider normal isn't normal for everyone else.

^Oga Deborah, if I no get Facebook nko?

Idowuogbo: ^Oga Deborah, if I no get Facebook nko?

use a private investigator......

debosky:

Facebook?

Good one. And one can truly stalk a guy on facebook without seeming like a nutjob. Unless they are not on facebook or keep a limited facebook profile.

Meet a number of his friends?

I doubt he would introduce the girl to friends that would out him as a married man if he has decided to deceive her. They would probably 'have his back'.

debosky:
Or do ladies jump into relationships these days without finding out anything about the person they intend to make their boyfriends?

I guess I was just lucky then. I don't believe I have ever tried to find out if any toaster was married before I dated them in the past. But maybe it's an age thing? As in, it's easier to believe a guy's single when he's in his 20's than when he's in his 40's.

Most married men these days make no attempts ro hide their statuses anyway.They either tell u head on or the signs are usually there.They expect that women should understand the game and play along if they would.
However,I know of a few cases where the marital status was hidden and i think the ones who hide their statuses do it if they think the girl is a very upright person and they want her as a conquest or just for the game..

But op talk true, you enjoy the 'spoiling with good stuffs of life'.

You'd be a bigger hypocrite if you do and then come here to rant when they want 'underneath' things

tpia@:



then you shouldnt be tripping over married men who you say are disturbing you.

womanizing nigerian men [dont know about others] typically do not waste their time if they feel a woman isnt going to respond to their advances. They size you up first, before they go in for the kill.

so, if married men are chasing you round the clock on nl or elsewhere, there's likely to have been a green light from your end, in some way.

assuming there was none, then i think a simple ignore mode would suffice, if no sounds too rude.

i didnt even see this on time.

Tashamania
All I need is a PM from you telling me you'll love me to be your val and I'll ask the MODs to lock up this thread

Tashamania
ASAP! Hope dude's got a fat account PM his number. As am so desperate, I'll do the calling

Hope you remember this thread
https://www.nairaland.com/1185671/sissys-guys-without-val-let's

i cant remember you giving the invitations to single guys only. (S)he who gathers ant infested firewood, you know na.......

Tashamania:

I wanna give them their last respect by creating this very thread. And after this, they dont stop, my next thread title would go thus : List of married men disturbing me for 'friendship' on NL. So, just pray they don't stop.
I am capable.

Now, that is a pratical step. However, you have to look at yourself too. You are not the only young lady here. How come men especially married ones are chasing you like their lives depended on it?

Connoisseur:



Hope you remember this thread
https://www.nairaland.com/1185671/sissys-guys-without-val-let's

i cant remember giving the invitations to single guys only. (S)he who gathers ant infested firewood, you know na.......

End of discussion. OP, if it is beauty, I am sure there are 1001 beautiful girls on Nairaland that don't get disturbed.

So, search yourself before complaining about the men.

I siddon here dey look. Hhmn!
Btw news has it that my hubby has been eyeing u

the calm before the storm?

biolabee: the calm before the storm?

there aint gonna be any storm cos she knows she s been busted, revealed for who she is: an attention seeker. after trolling through the 'land making herself available and appearing desperate, she comes here spewing thrash bout getting what she truly wants in the first place.

Hypocrites

Connoisseur:

there aint gonna be any storm cos she knows she s been busted, revealed for who she is: an attention seeker. after trolling through the 'land making herself available and appearing desperate, she comes here spewing thrash bout getting what she truly wants in the first place.

Hypocrites

brah.. u cruel ,,,,,,
lolz

biolabee:

brah.. u cruel ,,,,,,
lolz

nah i aint cruel just sick and tired of these ladies who go about sucking men into their (mis)adventures and then turn around to cry hoarse.
its not uncommon to see this girls tempting married men especially the young and successful amongst them. you hear them saying 'you are married dosent meanyou cant buy a girl a drink, lunch or wateva'. They make themselves available in ways that could be termed 'green light' and thenturn around to shout whats wrong with married men.
let these girls behave themselves and lets see if these married men wouldnt go home and mind their wives.

Connoisseur:

nah i aint cruel just sick and tired of these ladies who go about sucking men into their (mis)adventures and then turn around to cry hoarse.
its not uncommon to see this girls tempting married men especially the young and successful amongst them. you hear them saying 'you are married dosent meanyou cant buy a girl a drink, lunch or wateva'. They make themselves available in ways that could be termed 'green light' and thenturn around to shout whats wrong with married men.
let these girls behave themselves and lets see if these married men wouldnt go home and mind their wives.

GBAM!!!

@OP,
After opening various threads inviting male members of the forum to engage in relationships with you.
Why all this hypocrisy.
Are you not regularly on the dating/meet up zone of the romance section soliciting for relationships?

Did she solicit for relationships from married men? What's all this hypocrisy on this thread? If she's looking for relationships with fellow single people like herself what's the problem with that? Why are all you married people bitter that a beautiful girl doesn't want you? You all need to produce evidence that she deliberately solicited for a married man or shut it with your hypocrisy and bitterness.

In fact I'm beginning to wonder if she has refused the advances of some people on this thread. OP please come and name and shame them abeg. Imagine someone claiming that a married man cannot behave himself because someone tempts him? What is a married man looking for in the dating and meet up zone?

ileobatojo: Did she solicit for relationships from married men? What's all this hypocrisy on this thread? If she's looking for relationships with fellow single people like herself what's the problem with that? Why are all you married people bitter that a beautiful girl doesn't want you? You all need to produce evidence that she deliberately solicited for a married man or shut it with your hypocrisy and bitterness.

In fact I'm beginning to wonder if she has refused the advances of some people on this thread. OP please come and name and shame them abeg. Imagine someone claiming that a married man cannot behave himself because someone tempts him? What is a married man looking for on the dating and meet up zone?

like some one said earlier

tpia@:



womanizing nigerian men [dont know about others] typically do not waste their time if they feel a woman isnt going to respond to their advances They size you up first, before they go in for the kill.

when she goes about soliciting for relationship, whatever she gets is her cross. she should sieve the ones she want and not come here to sound sanctimonous to us all.
my point is na whether she order for market na im she get

Connoisseur:

when she goes about soliciting for relationship, whatever she gets is her cross. she should sieve the ones she want and not come here to sound sanctimonous to us all.
my point is na whether she order for market na im she get

My point is, if she is going around soliciting for relationships, why should married men be answering her call? Don't they have wives at home to face?

My second point is why are you all acting like its wrong for a single woman to look for relationships online? She has said she is only looking for fellow singles.

When you gather ant infested fire wood,please do not complain if you are visited by all types of lizards/reptiles.

^^
Please help me explian to ileobatojo maybe (s)he will understand better from you

ileobatojo: My second point is why are you all acting like its wrong for a single woman to look for relationships online? She has said she is only looking for fellow singles.

maybe you should look up the word 'desperate' in your dictionary and understand why all manner of men would flock to her

Connoisseur: ^^
Please help me explian to ileobatojo maybe (s)he will understand better from you

That one na confirmed feminazi.
Waste time on her at your own risk.

Connoisseur:

maybe you should look up the word 'desperate' in your dictionary and understand why all manner of men would flock to her

Because one opens a. Thread doesn't necessarily mean thats what they do.
Tht vals thread was a joke right from. The start, so pls stop diggn up dead thread and using them as referral to the issue at hand.
No insults intended

candygosh:

Because one opens a. Thread doesn't necessarily mean thats what they do.
Tht vals thread was a joke right from. The start, so pls stop diggn up dead thread and using them as referral to the issue at hand.
No insults intended

no offence taken
but what if those pm s she recieved were jokes that came out of her vals joke thread.
its possible you know

Just a question connoisseur are you condemning online friendship

biolabee: Just a question connoisseur are you condemning online friendship

nah i am not in any way doing that. all i am saying is when you 'solicit' for friendship online, its like opening a pandora s box and all manner of stuffs are sure gonna creep out. so if you solicit, dont cry when you get what you asked for.

Connoisseur:

nah i am not in any way doing that. all i am saying is when you 'solicit' for friendship online, its like opening a pandora s box and all manner of stuffs are sure gonna creep out. so if you solicit, dont cry when you get what you asked for.

ok

Before we turn this into a boxing match. Where is the poster? she came here, dropped this cry of frustration and when the intelligent people of NL not only dug her past out and her old thread, all of a sudden she has disappeared.

Yesterday I took the time out to read her post once more and when I got to the part where she said HER SCHOOL I just simply stopped reading. A female student in Nigeria? have created multiple thread here looking for somebody to date? and still come here to complain?

All this RUNS GIRLS for Nigerian Universities.

While others see nothing wrong in girls doing it, but i have always being WARY of GIRLS wey OPEN EYES so tay them go dey post online say them want relationships( it shows desperation) if you are that hot with men(single/married)flocking around and yet you still come around trolling for a relationship online, when there are the ones you see physically pursuing you and yet no show then there must be something wrong with you.

@poster don't waste our time here as you know yourself better than us. And my advice to you? go and sin no more because metal sharpens metal and the way you carry yourself will attract the kind of men you deserve.

Connoisseur:

no offence taken
but what if those pm s she recieved were jokes that came out of her vals joke thread.
its possible you know

Well u and I don't know whts goin on. Till then I'd just implore us to not reach an. Unjustifiable conclusion

@lafflaff, its funny how u got to the point of labbelling someone u vent met a runs girl.
May God forgive us all