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Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive - Romance - Nairaland

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Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by ladydibia(f): 3:45pm On Apr 14, 2008
Hello guys and gals,
Its been a long time,how una dey?
Please is it rite to take permission from ur guy before attending a birthday party which ur colleague and one time admirer,is celebrating?
i attended my colleague's bday wit a plain mind and no strings attached, i attended as his colleague,i was not the only one, i was there with my other colleagues and then my guy called me and while gisting happily i told him i was at my colleague's birthday party,and when he realized that it was the same guy that had been admiring me ,he got angry.

Abeg make una tell me how una see this matter.

I am serious about it,

Thanks alot. wink
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by iice(f): 3:53pm On Apr 14, 2008
Depends on the type of person he is and his understanding of you.
Some relationships require some sort of permission. Others don't. Sometimes its the situation that determines it.
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Nobody: 3:55pm On Apr 14, 2008
@poster

i beg na love ,e dey shark am like ogogoro,na hm make am dey jealous,attend more parties jare,aftreall him never put u for house yet tongue tongue
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Busta(f): 3:58pm On Apr 14, 2008
I wouldn't call it asking for permission but telling him and letting him know where i'd be. . .afterall, u guys ain't married yet

It would be nice to tell your boyfriend before hand that u would be attending such party. . . .and the celebrant is someone who used to admire u. If possible, invite him along. if not for anything but for peace and that he knows where his girlfriend is  . . .rather than some friends of his telling him that they saw his girlfriend at some dudes party and who knows, they might decide to add some salt and pepper.

I'll be pissed if my boyfriend went to some admirer party without telling me.
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Sisikill: 4:10pm On Apr 14, 2008
Please is it rite to take permission. . .


I can't believe you have to ask this. . .of course you have to take permission. How else will your parents know where you are? Honestly, children this days sef. I tire oh!

Wait. . . Reading post again Oh Sisikill you've gone and done it now. embarassed


@ Poster
I'm so sorry. . .I see the phrase TAKE PERMISSION and the 1st thing that comes to my mind is taking permission from Parents, grandparents, Uncle, Aunty. . .you catch my drift. It never occurred to me that you are talking about taking permission from your guy to attend another guy and colleagues party.

So. . .take permission from your guy to go somewhere ehn.  I guess there is nothing. . .I'm sorry, I can't just match the words permission with boyfriend (Husband I can manage but boyfriend? Are you kidding me?)
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Sisikill: 4:15pm On Apr 14, 2008
Busta:


I wouldn't call it asking for permission but telling him and letting him know where i'd be.


Aaah, okay. Now this makes more sense. Thank you. . .you are a wise woman.


@Poster
Yeah. . .what she said.

Lol. . .I had images of her timidly asking and him saying "NO and that's the last word on this matter" You know. . .the same way daddies used to. *sigh* I miss my daddy.
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by ladydibia(f): 4:40pm On Apr 14, 2008
heloo house ,
You know why i used that word permission,it is becos that is what it looks like.After you tell him he will then say you can go or dont go,what do u now call that is it just telling him or permission in diguise.
I am not against the fact that when u go out wit admirers or male friends you should tell ur guy,it is good to do that,but a time may come and u forget 2 tell him not becos u are hiding it,but becos u see it as just that and he is angry.
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Busta(f): 4:43pm On Apr 14, 2008
ladydibia:

heloo house ,
[b]You know why i used that word permission,it is because that is what it looks like.After you tell him he will then say you can go or don't go,what do u now call that is it just telling him or permission in diguise.[/b]I am not against the fact that when u go out wit admirers or male friends you should tell your guy,it is good to do that,but a time may come and u forget 2 tell him not because u are hiding it,but because u see it as just that and he is angry.

it is because u already presented it to him like u needed his permission.

then again, everyone's mentality is different! undecided

I already made up my mind to go and purpose of telling him is so that he'll know that I have plans that day and he'll know where i'd be. What would I need his permission for? so cao am dating him, i can't go out again and must seek his approver to go or not to go?
If he don't trust me enough then what is the whole purpose of the relationship?
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Sisikill: 5:05pm On Apr 14, 2008
ladydibia:

heloo house ,
You know why i used that word permission,it is because that is what it looks like.After you tell him he will then say you can go or don't go,what do u now call that is it just telling him or permission in diguise.
I am not against the fact that when u go out wit admirers or male friends you should tell your guy,it is good to do that,but a time may come and u forget 2 tell him not because u are hiding it,but because u see it as just that and he is angry.


Hi lady, first off thank you for making things clearer. Secondly, let me ask you this. . .what will you do if he says no?
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Nobody: 5:33pm On Apr 14, 2008
u dont have to obtain permission from him especially as u r not yet married but would have been nice to let him k now before hand. now u have some explaining and re-assuring to do.
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by tRoOE(f): 6:00pm On Apr 14, 2008
Busta:

I wouldn't call it asking for permission but telling him and letting him know where i'd be. . .afterall, u guys ain't married yet

It would be nice to tell your boyfriend before hand that u would be attending such party. . . .and the celebrant is someone who used to admire u. If possible, invite him along. if not for anything but for peace and that he knows where his girlfriend is . . .rather than some friends of his telling him that they saw his girlfriend at some dudes party and who knows, they might decide to add some salt and pepper. I'll be pissed if my boyfriend went to some admirer party without telling me.
You said it all
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by LASIEFAIRE(m): 6:07pm On Apr 14, 2008
Busta:

I wouldn't call it asking for permission but telling him and letting him know where i'd be. . .afterall, u guys ain't married yet

It would be nice to tell your boyfriend before hand that u would be attending such party. . . .and the celebrant is someone who used to admire u. If possible, invite him along. if not for anything but for peace and that he knows where his girlfriend is . . .rather than some friends of his telling him that they saw his girlfriend at some dudes party and who knows, they might decide to add some salt and pepper.

I'll be pissed if my boyfriend went to some admirer party without telling me.

you hit the nail right on the head. Its just a courtesy that you can afford him.
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by SamMilla1(m): 10:30pm On Apr 14, 2008
Sometimes it baffles me the way people answer other peoples questions here.
This guy is the only person who knows his girlfriend.
This girl here is telling us the party guy is colleague,
What kind of colleague.Its obvious he can't trust u with the guy.
I would do the same given the same circumstances
He don't trust you and you have to win his trust first.
Then he can let you go anywhere without worry,
Look at your question''IS IT RIGHT TO TAKE PERMISSION FROM UR GUY B4 ATTENDING A BIRTHDAY PARTY''
So you think the right thing to do is to just stroll out to a party without caring to let him know?
A party where u could get drunk and wouldnt even know which boy talked to you.
One thing i have discovered about ladies is that most of them are too ignorant to know when a guy loves them
Some think going to MR BIGGS is love.
Others thinks buying the latest flatest mobile phone is love, NO.
Love is more like him being jealous of you talking to other boyz.
                                                        Colleague/admirer my foot,
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 10:36pm On Apr 14, 2008
Frankly, girlie, if you had nothing to hide you would have told him. I have seen situations like this before. before you know it you begin to see so much faults in your boyfriend that you did not see before undecided
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 10:39pm On Apr 14, 2008
It always starts out as harmless gestures, and believe you me it always never end that way wink
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by almondjoy(f): 10:44pm On Apr 14, 2008
The guy is insecure and shows he is the kind of person that cannot stand anyone having more fun than himself.  Jealousy or possessiveness does not even apply here. He is just being "petty" and "insecure".

These are the kinds of people that get jealous of your progress even when they have no cause to.  Very unsettling I would say.  I would need to watch him to see if he is just being immature or just plain jobless/insecure.  My assignment for the future would be to keep this relationship under serious scrutiny.

Obviously, you guys are not on the same wave length.  I see a lot of problems in the future stemming from "pettiness" and "mind control" issues.  Typical of a timid and unsophisticated guy. . . village mindset! I think you just hooked up with "The Village Headmaster" big time.

Good luck poster! kiss
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 10:53pm On Apr 14, 2008
I thought the question is " should she have told him about the party or not"
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Cadet(f): 10:57pm On Apr 14, 2008
Once you sense that a guy is being overly jealous or possessive. Please run as far as possible away from him! Jealousy Possessive, potatoe potato, same thing. Very deadly for a relationship, literally deadly. Just a sound advice
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by almondjoy(f): 11:01pm On Apr 14, 2008
Are they married?  Who needs to give who permission to do what?  Please. . .nothing serious reach like that right now. They are living seperate lives and no one is accountable for the other right now.  What is his business if she decides to go to the moon without telling him. . .especially knowing how the "village headmaster" would react. I would not even bother to tell him to save myself his irritating "hormonal bitchiness" even worse than that of a native goat.  Who has time for "natives"?

Can't get in the way of ma having a good time.  Sorry!  When we are married what will he do then?  I would have to tell him when I decide to take a piss or a shit? undecided

Oh hell! What a bore and a killjoy. Now wonder the poster is out having fun at an old flame's birthday bash instead of by his dry arse's behind. I would definitely do the same.

Shiooooooooooooooooooooor!
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Uche2nna(m): 11:05pm On Apr 14, 2008
Please is it rite to take permission from your guy


No U dont. But it wont hurt to let him know .
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by almondjoy(f): 11:07pm On Apr 14, 2008
Thank you! What a perfect gentleman!

As always! kiss
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Cadet(f): 11:07pm On Apr 14, 2008
Uche2nna:

Please is it rite to take permission from your guy
Take permission for wetin? That question sef makes me want to slap the poster angry Will he take permission from you? Plz, all this sexist sh^t needs to stop
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 11:19pm On Apr 14, 2008
Would you be happy to call your man and he tells you he is at a birthday party of a girl you know has the hots for him undecided
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by almondjoy(f): 11:20pm On Apr 14, 2008
Wetin consine Oyinbo man with Ijebu Garri?
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 11:22pm On Apr 14, 2008
I think the golden rule is to do unto others as you would want them to do to you kiss
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by SamMilla1(m): 11:22pm On Apr 14, 2008
Dalby:

Would you be happy to call your man and he tells you he is at a birthday party of a girl you know has the hots for him undecided

thank you for that question
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Cadet(f): 11:24pm On Apr 14, 2008
Dalby:

I think the golden rule is to do unto others as you would want them to do to you kiss
So just because he's being overly possessive, I have to allow it?
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by TheSly: 11:26pm On Apr 14, 2008
Please is it rite to take permission. . .
To me. . . .Taking permission is lame!
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Cadet(f): 11:27pm On Apr 14, 2008
Dalby:

Would you be happy to call your man and he tells you he is at a birthday party of a girl you know has the hots for him undecided
I would happily tell him to enjoy himself grin Then when he gets home, na another show! JK o
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 11:28pm On Apr 14, 2008
Cadet:

So just because he's being overly possessive, I have to allow it?

You would have to if and only if the tables were turned you will feel like he is right now(overly possessive) cool
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by almondjoy(f): 11:30pm On Apr 14, 2008
I wonder when people will learn to concentrate on themselves and stop worrying about what others are doing especially if they are not married to the other person.  It just shows that life is actually very boring to be that needy. Looking for someone to police about.

This is how people develop "abusive" natures.  The inability to respect others' privacies and choices in life. . .it has to be your way or no way. . .like you are a god or something? I think if everyone was gainfully employed and happy with themselves. . .they would not pick a fight at every possible opportunity with others for enjoying themselves.

If ma husband or boyfriend did the same to me. . .I would not even flinch.  Yes!  That also means do "unto others". Don't bother me with your pettiness and I would not bother you with mine! If it is not the girlfriend, it is the wife!  If it is not the son, it is the daughter.  If it is not the brother, it is the sister.  If it is not the mother, it is the father.  Always looking for someone's business to but into. If they can't find anyone to bother. . .then they start to harass the neighbours cat or dog!  Learn to mind your own business please. . .if you life is miserable. . .please keep it to yourself!  Don't spread the disease to others. . .  Thank you very much! kiss

EVEN IF WE ARE MARRIED!

Shikena! kiss
Re: Is He Being Jealous Or Possessive by Dalby(m): 11:31pm On Apr 14, 2008
Cadet:

I would happily tell him to enjoy himself grin Then when he gets home, na another show! JK o

Wetin man never see before undecided

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