ok am getting this off my chest,  first of all whoever may read this may either agree or disagree and i am certain only a man would disagree. This are my grieviances,  Nigerian men always don't want a woman who speaks her mind. if she talks he says she nags too much but when it comes to him he wants to do the talking and always be the man.Then when he has sucessfully dated the woman for years and wasted her time he starts to say he wants a wife material,  what he means is a woman who takes his shit and doesnt reply when he talks or probably represents all what his friends will envy,  then the so called old girl friend is dumped!!! i get so irritated by this because i meet men that say they are not going to marry thewoman they are with because they a looking for the next best thing,  my message to them is,  if you don't want a woman who can tlk back or express herself go marry a nun and get over your self.
My second issue is this thing with guys thinking that when a woman sleeps with you soon she is cheap,  well, breaking news!!!! u are cheap because if you could have kept your wandering THING to yourself maybe your mouth wont open and insult the lady. another thing is nigerian men can complain that black girls are difficult and go on to date white women,  well they do that because the white woman is calm and would probably hang on the fan to have sex with you. no disrespect to white women, i live in England and i do see good ones as well the only issues is their black men keep cheating. talking about cheating, GOSH,  i could go on forever,  MEN CHEAT!!!! well its not new because they think its a mans world,  well as they cheat i always wonder how a man can cope with sinking into diffrent things,  my dears i envy you for all the effort of taking in different smells ,  i hope they don't fall into a sewage tank.
Another thing is with regard to the shape and size of woman they want, Nigerian men want a woman who looks thin on her wedding gown or maybe wants his woman to be from in quote a "good home" well i have got news for you, not everyone who cames from your so called defination of a good home is a good wife and people can pretend but trust nigerian men not to notice,  all they want is for everyone to say he bagged a fine woman. you meet a man who loves big women and goes on to have a slim wife and cheats on her with big women,  and vice versa,  whats the sense in that?
we are in a new world and maybe we woman should define what we want and then u guys would know how it really feels.I never understand why a woman wastes her time praying to mayying some guy who treats her like shit,  it amazes me,
Lastly, GUYS GUYS GUYS,  I am at the stage in my life where i don't care because men pretend and want you to be something u are not,  when u are wild they say u are not wife material,  i hate that word so much i want to puke when i hear it,  Nigerian marriages are not happy today because people are not with the right people,  or maybe you marry someone because your family wants you to marry a particular tribe,  sorry for you,  because you are wasting your time. think marriage is only about babies,  what happened to excitement?,  i could go on forever but ,  i will leave it here, its hard to find a liberated Nigerian man who can handle an Educated woman because all they want are Quiet women who wont talk when they are all crazy. call me a liberated woman, or crazy or frustrated but am done with nigerian men and all their rubbish,  GO TO THE VILLAGE AND MARRY  if it means so much to you to marry someone who doesnt talk back.

Nubian, not all Nigerian men are the way you describe.

I for one, wouldn't want to be with a doormat, a woman who doesn't have an opinion of her own, and merely agrees with everything I say.

I'm not a "yes" man, and similarly, wouldn't want to settle with a "yes" woman. How boring that'll be.

NubianQ,

Reading through your post,i can understand your point of view based on your previous experience.Knowing fully well the nature of "your man" and "your liberated woman life style" having a durable relationship will be difficult except you adopt the franch motto Liberté, Equalité, Fraternité ("Liberty, Equality, Fraternity".
Don;t loose hope,because you have not meet "your man" except you are destined to be without a man.Set yourself free from that crazy idea of emacipation and flow with the tide based on your preconditions.
I wish you the best

NubianQ:

we are in a new world and maybe we woman should define what we want and then u guys would know how it really feels.I never understand why a woman wastes her time praying to mayying some guy who treats her like shit, it amazes me,
Lastly, GUYS GUYS GUYS, I am at the stage in my life where i don't care because men pretend and want you to be something u are not, when u are wild they say u are not wife material, i hate that word so much i want to puke when i hear it, Nigerian marriages are not happy today because people are not with the right people, or maybe you marry someone because your family wants you to marry a particular tribe, sorry for you, because you are wasting your time. think marriage is only about babies, what happened to excitement?, i could go on forever but , i will leave it here, its hard to find a liberated Nigerian man who can handle an Educated woman because all they want are Quiet women who wont talk when they are all crazy. call me a liberated woman, or crazy or frustrated but am done with nigerian men and all their rubbish, GO TO THE VILLAGE AND MARRY if it means so much to you to marry someone who doesnt talk back.

I feel u sister and I agree with you whole heartedly

I made the decision a long time ago that I will make the choice, I decide what direction my life is heading and with whom
form a very young i age i saw what the quest for marriage and acceptance from men can do to women and i promised myself i wont be that person.

There are Nigeiran men with the values u seek, I know cos I've met a few and girl,,, its worth the wait,,,
hang in there and keep being strong
when u meet them u'll know because they'll recognise the person inside and they'll treat u with the respect u deserve
Liberation isnt a bad thing, its about knowing who u are and what you want

Not all Nigerian men. . . .

More like why are Nigerian men so disgraceful? Oops, I meant most Nigerian men

Blah, blah, blah!!!!!!!

Well, Thanks for your comments and to be honest, i get to a stage in my life where i think i may never be with a nigerian man and its fine with me,  so many things are so hurtful when it comes to them. yesterday i poured my heart out because i have been a victim myself and my friends have been through hell, a friend of mine dated a guy since she was 23 and when she turned 28 after 5 years with him he leave her and says he left because he knew she would want marriage and when i had a one to one tlk with him he told me he didnt like her anymore,  i felt hurt because she was there for him and when he started hanging with younger girls she wasnt appealing to him. couldnt he have broke up with her years earlier?,  now  she is 28 and the bad news is when u are 28 and want to get married some silly men say you  are old or desperate,  well as for whoever think am yapping BLAH BLAH BLAH,  i guess u live in denial and i wont blame u because if only u listened u would find that its not what u think,  the truth matters an i am airing it,  if no one likes it then ignore the post i rather people give intelligent responses than waste other peoples time readin uncessary rants. thanks again people for reading,.

HR hotness, thanks for your kind comment, i like people like you who know the truth,

NubianQ:

Well, Thanks for your comments and to be honest, i get to a stage in my life where i think i may never be with a nigerian man and its fine with me, so many things are so hurtful when it comes to them. yesterday i poured my heart out because i have been a victim myself and my friends have been through hell, a friend of mine dated a guy since she was 23 and when she turned 28 after 5 years with him he leave her and says he left because he knew she would want marriage and when i had a one to one tlk with him he told me he didnt like her anymore, i felt hurt because she was there for him and when he started hanging with younger girls she wasnt appealing to him. couldnt he have broke up with her years earlier?, now she is 28 and the bad news is when u are 28 and want to get married some silly men say you are old or desperate, well as for whoever think am yapping BLAH BLAH BLAH, i guess u live in denial and i wont blame u because if only u listened u would find that its not what u think, the truth matters an i am airing it, if no one likes it then ignore the post i rather people give intelligent responses than waste other peoples time readin uncessary rants. thanks again people for reading,.

HR hotness, thanks for your kind comment, i like people like you who know the truth,

@NubianQ,

I'm a man and I completely agree that some men are assholes and should be cemented with iron rods under the foundation of a high-rise building - absolutely disgusting men, dirty, nasty, crazy, filled with stupid arrogance and annoying pride. I've come across several of these pieces of shit and witnessed how they've abused the helpless women in their lives.

However, the question is, why are so many women wooed by these imbeciles? I do not subscribe to all that nonsensical talk that people pretend throughout the duration of a relationship. Pretense is only temporary! You date a guy for years and can't tell he's bullshit? Give me a break! Guys reveal themselves quickly, but most women deliberately choose the arrogant, nasty, selfish men over the empathetic, kind, selfless guys, especially when they (the women) are younger and still "going wild". When that your friend was 23, when she was still "hot", she wanted a "hot guy". Now, after five years, she's 28 and the hot guy doesn't have the hots for her anymore.

In the dating game, women have choices. As long as women continue to make stupid choices in the kind of men they date, many will continue to find themselves in stupid situations.

_{The balance in the universe has to be maintained.}

well, Richy i have to say u are right on this one, well i never wanted a hot guy infact all my life i was in relationships without cheating and being truthful. its doesnt help and i have learnt that. well , we all hope but it just doesnt work,

liberated Nigerian man who can handle an Educated woman because all they want are Quiet women

when u are wild they say u are not wife material,

Call it denial or whatever you think I'll have to tell you it depends on what you call "talking back." I've seen the so called educated black women that thinks bitchiness, ranting and raving is being liberated.
Personally I will never have anything to do with people that describe themselves in such words as "wild."

wild water

and for once I agree with RichyBlack, I dont get the attraction. True Colors usually come out at least witin the first year of a relationship, actually less than that really.

I always wanted a wife material. I always knew that I would never marry a woman who is not wife material and I have no regrets today.

Not all guys are the same. What some guys want is not what others want so every woman needs to know what she wants in a guy and when she sees it, she should stay with him.

Problem is(as someone stated earlier) many young girls like the wild guys who are likely to treat them like dumps. If you are attracted to someone who is likely to treat you badly later, you can hardly blame anyone for that but yourself.

There are millions of good and happy marriages but you dont hear so much about them because they have no need to come and shout about their marriages in public fora. The only things you're likely to hear in a public forum is bad news about relationships. It's easy enough to see someone for what they are before too long in a relationship.

Everyone should check themselves and consider exactly what attracts them to the opposite sex and they'll see why they keep having failed relationships.

I wish you all the best

NubianQ:

well, Richy i have to say u are right on this one, well i never wanted a hot guy infact all my life i was in relationships without cheating and being truthful. its doesnt help and i have learnt that. well , we all hope but it just doesnt work,

Well, there is more. One of the biggest problems with some women is that, while coming of age, they did not have positive male role models in their lives. This sometimes makes it harder for them to understand men.

Another problem is divorce. A woman who grew up with her divorced mom, may be negatively indoctrinated by her mom about men, out of the bitterness the mom has for the dad. This case of mothers passing on their bitterness towards men to their daughters plagues many Western divorce-riddled societies.

A third issue is weight. Most men, thanks to Hollywood, do not want to date heavy-set sisters. With increasing levels of obesity in many societies, and the link being shown between obesity and several diseases, the issue of weight is playing a keener role in dating. My advice for those ladies: hit the gym


_{Dating is still a two-player game: man makes first move, woman makes next move. Without the first move there is no game!}

D-reloaded:

wild water

and for once I agree with RichyBlack, I don't get the attraction. True Colors usually come out at least witin the first year of a relationship, actually less than that really.

Thank God o! D-reloaded don agree with nwa nna!

_{I'm liking your new profile pic. How far?}

I dey jare. when did you start yarning sensible stuff? Or is this some trick to make vote for you as moderator?

i am here to save the Nubian queen. worship your feet and put u on a pedestal. my royal highness

@topic

I object

Nigerian men, you've wrongly described them through the one you met.

I know a lot of them who would marry a girl for 3 reasons. Smart, tells them off rightly, and good in bed(I mean that doesn't snore )

AS EXPECTED ALL I GET ARE MEN BEING SO PESSIMISTIC!!! WELL I SAID IT AND You KNOW D TRUTH,  ITS NOT MEANT TO BE AN INSULT TO MEN, ITS JUST THAT SOMETIME THINGS  NEED TO BE SAID,  AND RICHY AS FOR  THE TALK ON  WEIGHT ,  WHATS WRONG WITH BEING WHO YOU RE? I AGREE WEIGHT IS A PROBLEM IN SOCIETIES AND WE ARE ALL GUILTY OF STUFFING OUR FACES BUT LETS ALL ADMIT, WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE OF SOMETHING,

D-reloaded:

I dey jare. when did you start yarning sensible stuff? Or is this some trick to make vote for you as moderator?

See you, I've been yarning sensible stuff since .


_{Can I count on you when the time comes? - Commodus in Gladiator (2000)}

NubianQ:

AS EXPECTED ALL I GET ARE MEN BEING SO PESSIMISTIC!!! WELL I SAID IT AND You KNOW D TRUTH, ITS NOT MEANT TO BE AN INSULT TO MEN, ITS JUST THAT SOMETIME THINGS NEED TO BE SAID, AND RICHY AS FOR THE TALK ON WEIGHT , WHATS WRONG WITH BEING WHO YOU RE? I AGREE WEIGHT IS A PROBLEM IN SOCIETIES AND WE ARE ALL GUILTY OF STUFFING OUR FACES BUT LETS ALL ADMIT, WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE OF SOMETHING,

Don't get me wrong o, I didn't mean to be insensitive to our chubby sisters. All I'm saying is that do some exercise can curb the weight problem, at least to some extent. Why I mentioned weight is because I've come across too many sisters with "man issues" tied to the size of their waist lines. The media has made it difficult for plus size women to favorably compete in the dating arena, however, it has also exposed us to shows like the Biggest Loser! _{You just got to love Ali Vincent}

simply put, these are the rantings of a highly frustrated woman

You must have fallen victim to some pretty despicable naija men, some whom you really wanted but didn't treat you right.

Now its not right to paint all men with the same brush, there are STILL some good ones out there.

People have prejudices/preferences everywhere - it is very subjective and you don't have the right to blame men for wanting one thing more than another, that is completely their prerogative.

As to the comment of 'hanging on the fan to have sex' what on earth is wrong with that in a loving relationship? I'm so sick of the prudish attitude of SOME Nigerian women, you don't want to be freaky but yet complain when the man goes outside.

Men have jilted women since the beginning of time and vice versa, and I commiserate with whatever hurts you've felt. But in the end, we are all finally responsible for our choices. I do not think a 'naija - man' would be suitable for everyone, I hope you find what you are searching for.

Orignal poster please use paragraphs!!!
 

No guy is prefect the key is ladies you are always in control no matter he thinks.  Play the dumb bimbo act weak.  But you really carry the cards.

Never ever give it up easy! Play hard to get. Remember your honey is worth waiting for. Tease in a clever way (dont get raped)

Well be careful on the choice of your man.Na oyibo man do one of our sister this ooo


Nigerian woman in coma for 18 years in Vienna
Written by TUNDE AKINGBADE
Saturday, 23 February 2008
* Family meets victim, children

The family of the Nigerian woman, said to have been in coma for 18 years in Vienna after allegedly being battered by her Austrian husband, finally visited the victim penultimate week.

AFTER 18 years of being in coma, the family of Victoria Znidaric, the Nigerian woman who was allegedly battered by her Austrian engineer husband, Stankov Znidaric, finally saw her in pathetic state penultimate week in a nursing home outside Vienna, the Austrian capital. For many years the family in Nigeria had been informed that Victoria was dead. She was mourned at her village near Ekpoma, Edo State and this caused depression that people said eventually killed her parents.

No one in Nigeria had any inkling about the truth surrounding the matter until 10 years later when news filtered to Nigeria that Victoria was in a pitiable state at a nursing home in Austria. Since then, every attempt by any member of the family to visit her in Austria was rebuffed by the Austrian embassy in Abuja under different guises.

Then, Sunday Vanguard published the plight of the woman and her family in Nigeria .Penultimate week, a representative of the family, Mr. Arthur Iyere O., a graduate of mathematics and statistics who had been in the vanguard of inquisition to find out the state of Victoria and reconcile the two children of the marriage with their Nigerian root, finally saw Victoria and met her children - Christopher and Victor - through the intervention of the Association of Democracy in Africa and Worldwide (ADA) which confronted the Austrian embassy through the ministry of interior in Vienna.

Following the visit of the representative of the Nigerian family and the contact with the children of the battered woman 18 years after the incident and 22 years after her leaving Nigeria, the story hit headlines of no fever than five newspapers in Vienna with series of press conferences being organised in the country to highlight the plight and sorry state of the Nigerian woman. A fund raising is being organized to assist the woman who needs a wheel chair estimated at about 6,000 dollars. The children of the woman were very much excited to meet a representative of their mother’s family in Nigeria. They expressed delight in finally being connected to their Nigerian root and expressed hope of visiting in the near future.

Although the Nigerian family has not located the children’s father who allegedly battered their mother during a scuffle, Sunday Vanguard was told by the victim’s eldest sister Mrs. Justina Ehijiator that the family was not interested in pressing any charges against or fighting the Austrian man. “All we want is to see our sister’s children and let them know the family,” she said Today, Victoria lies in a nursing home outside Vienna and can only raise her head and left shoulder. Beside, she reacts at the presence of visitors with strange sounds and howls like a wolf.

http://www.vanguardngr.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=3539&Itemid=123

brownbonno:

Well be careful on the choice of your man.Na oyibo man do one of our sister this ooo


Nigerian woman in coma for 18 years in Vienna
Written by TUNDE AKINGBADE
Saturday, 23 February 2008
* Family meets victim, children

The family of the Nigerian woman, said to have been in coma for 18 years in Vienna after allegedly being battered by her Austrian husband, finally visited the victim penultimate week.

AFTER 18 years of being in coma, the family of Victoria Znidaric, the Nigerian woman who was allegedly battered by her Austrian engineer husband, Stankov Znidaric, finally saw her in pathetic state penultimate week in a nursing home outside Vienna, the Austrian capital. For many years the family in Nigeria had been informed that Victoria was dead. She was mourned at her village near Ekpoma, Edo State and this caused depression that people said eventually killed her parents.

No one in Nigeria had any inkling about the truth surrounding the matter until 10 years later when news filtered to Nigeria that Victoria was in a pitiable state at a nursing home in Austria. Since then, every attempt by any member of the family to visit her in Austria was rebuffed by the Austrian embassy in Abuja under different guises.

Then, Sunday Vanguard published the plight of the woman and her family in Nigeria .Penultimate week, a representative of the family, Mr. Arthur Iyere O., a graduate of mathematics and statistics who had been in the vanguard of inquisition to find out the state of Victoria and reconcile the two children of the marriage with their Nigerian root, finally saw Victoria and met her children - Christopher and Victor - through the intervention of the Association of Democracy in Africa and Worldwide (ADA) which confronted the Austrian embassy through the ministry of interior in Vienna.

Following the visit of the representative of the Nigerian family and the contact with the children of the battered woman 18 years after the incident and 22 years after her leaving Nigeria, the story hit headlines of no fever than five newspapers in Vienna with series of press conferences being organised in the country to highlight the plight and sorry state of the Nigerian woman. A fund raising is being organized to assist the woman who needs a wheel chair estimated at about 6,000 dollars. The children of the woman were very much excited to meet a representative of their mother’s family in Nigeria. They expressed delight in finally being connected to their Nigerian root and expressed hope of visiting in the near future.

Although the Nigerian family has not located the children’s father who allegedly battered their mother during a scuffle, Sunday Vanguard was told by the victim’s eldest sister Mrs. Justina Ehijiator that the family was not interested in pressing any charges against or fighting the Austrian man. “All we want is to see our sister’s children and let them know the family,” she said Today, Victoria lies in a nursing home outside Vienna and can only raise her head and left shoulder. Beside, she reacts at the presence of visitors with strange sounds and howls like a wolf.

http://www.vanguardngr.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=3539&Itemid=123

Could they not have written that in a better manner. Bloody hell

what sane person marries those nazis??Austrians? Ugh

Did the family even know about the wedding, how could they have thought she was dead for almost 20 years?? So sad and the dude isnt even locked up

However, the question is, why are so many women wooed by these imbeciles?

Some people are just too damn gullible.

@Richyblack, Stillwater, and D-Reloaded: You guys are the best! well said.

Poster: make you take am easy Oh! look like the more your write the angrier you get! life too short and no one is obligated to dating or marrying a Nigeria man! you can marry someone from Ten-geria if that will make you happy.

I'm still wondering how your friend dated the guy you described in your post for 5 whole years before opening her eyes! now all naija men don enter wahala for your page!

bawomolo:

i am here to save the Nubian queen. worship your feet and put u on a pedestal. my royal highness

ashewo everywhere


Boring topic

@Cadet

Woman,how u doing? I have upgraded you from teeny bopper to a woman I will like to ****. Hurray!,you should feel "honoured".

Abeg,make those your other suitors give way. . . .I'm a jealous lover o.

4 Play. . .
Where u go na? he don tay we i don see u for hia oo
Hope say everything dey ok?

4 Play:

@Cadet

Woman,how u doing? I have upgraded you from teeny bopper to a woman I will like to ****. Hurray!,you should feel "honoured".

Abeg,make those your other suitors give way. . . .I'm a jealous lover o.

D-Reloaded! Plz, come and get your #@#@!