Middle Class and Upper Class Children

A friend of mine went to camp and made friends with different people that she would like to keep in touch with. I told her to invite them over to her house after camp and have a little get together to celebrate end of camp.

She said she can’t invite the girls to her house as it’s not a big house it’s just a 4 bedroom flat which is owned by her mum not rented o, (it’s one of those Government flats just to paint you a picture of what am talking about).  She said those girls come from a very rich background and does not want them to think less of her. She said you know Lagos girls now, once they know you are not on the same level as them they don’t want to know you and I need all the friends I can get if I am going to move back to Nigeria.

Ok, now this is what I don’t get… My friend does not exactly come from a poor home she schooled in the UK which her mum paid for and goes on holiday like twice a year. But leaving in a 4 bedroom Government flat in Ketu seem to be a big deal when it comes to making friends with the upper class kids.
I want to get an honest opinion from all you upper class boys or girls out there, you know who you are.

Does where people leave makes you determine if you can be friends with them?
What will you do if you meet a person and you get along with them but later realise that they are not as rich as they seem.
Be honest

that's the way the world IS,full of shallow minded people.i WAS once in the same position.i attended a private university which was quite expensive but lived in a 3-bedroom rented apartment with my parents.each time my friend said they'd love to visit me,my heart skipped a beat.i never let anyone know my house till my father built a house(A very lovely one).now my friends come to visit as much as they like. for ur friend,she shd maintain the status-quo until she feels it's ok to let them know where she lives.rich girls are snobs,'THAT'S A FACT'.But they might still like her.it cud go both ways

like the first poster said,the worls s full of shallow minded people and i must admit we all judge people first by appearance and your house and what part of lagos it is,i have to admit i wouldnt readily make friends if you lived in like ketu,iyana ipaja and all that when i was younger but i have never had the problem with inviting friends home cause my dad's house will be considered massive by nigerian standards, but it is worse with girls as they are more picky with people they roll with than guys, i guess maturity makes us all more acceptable of all classes of people, i have friends now in all classes both low,middle,high but i wouldnt visit you in some places and thats not cause im looking down on you but for my safety in the area

choosing friends based on where they live is the height of immaturity IMHO.

dominique:

choosing friends based on where they live is the height of immaturity IMHO.

you r very right but it goes right across all classes,age groups,countries and societies in nigeria and abroad

Does where people leave makes you determine if you can be friends with them?
What will you do if you meet a person and you get along with them but later realise that they are not as rich as they seem.
Be honest


if you choose friends base on material/possession as a criteria, then I'm sorry for you because you will not be self-satisfied in life.
you will be doing all your best to impress them(show-up) unnecessarilly, the life style of an IMPOSTER.
then, they are not TRUELLY your friends, but CO-RIVALS in SHOW-UP affairs.
living above whom you are is not a healthy state of mind.
REMEMBER THAT ANY HOUSE IN A CITY THAT CLAIMS TO BE THE FINEST IN A CITY WILL NOT HOLD THAT TITLE FOR LONG, OTHER LANDLORDS CAN PULL THEIR OWN DOWN AND ERECT A BETTER ONE.
be your self and you'll last, World Trade Center is no more, though was once the admiration of smaller houses around it.

hmmn,well depends on the landlord o my guy, i v not seen the landlord building near ibb's hill top mansion or them big boys lol

We all know some people do choose there friends base on where they leave and who their parents are

My question is why?

I know it’s shallow but there should be a reason to it.

hey hey hey hey, lets face it. only few of the so called upper class kids can mingle with the so called lower class. and u guys know it. inferiority and superiorty complex is rife amongst the upper class kids/children.

lemme ask some of u so called upper class kids a question? how many of u have close friends u and everyone knows are not in ur class?

lusc:

We all know some people do choose there friends base on where they leave and who their parents are

My question is why?

I know it’s shallow but there should be a reason to it.

i think one of the reasons is because no matter how rich you/your family are,you always want someone with a similar background because of networking,and to further secure yourself as u never know when u ll need their help or support,its like having a friend from say a governor's family and having a friend from maybe a guy from the other side of town,the practical reasons are clear that u ll benefit more from the governors family than the other guy,either from connections,help e.t.c
it might sound shallow tho im not in support of it but it has practical reasons as well because at the end of the day u might have a realli cool person,whose family are not on same level with yours and u r good friends and that apart from that ,u r not realli helping each other out apart from hanging out and f anyone needs the helping ,you ll prolly be the one to render the help, also most people by nature want to step up and not down, abeg im not advocating for upper class kids o just from the little i v seen

The other funny thing is if you leave in the UK, no one cares who your parents are. We all apply for that same £5.50 an hour job just to make some extra money in Uni. We all go to the same night club at the Westend and shop at Primark.

So is it just a Lagos thing?

Pure nonsense! It's probably a Nigeria thing. On this end, nobody cares who your father is, because you can be nothing today and be big tommorrow and vice-versa. When I was in Nigeria I mingled with everyone regardless of who they are. Even when I visit, I sit outside talk and have beer with the drivers, etc. me and the driver sit at the same table to eat. It's not a big deal at all. However, this class thing is very common in Nigeria.

She said she can’t invite the girls to her house as it’s not a big house it’s just a 4 bedroom flat which is owned by her mum not rented o, (it’s one of those Government flats just to paint you a picture of what am talking about). She said those girls come from a very rich background and does not want them to think less of her. She said you know Lagos girls now, once they know you are not on the same level as them they don’t want to know you and I need all the friends I can get if I am going to move back to Nigeria.

This is the mistake people make trying to impress other people. I take being in the middle class as an advantage in knowing who my friends really are. Who needs false friendships which aren't healthy for my well being, by the way? If the middle class is behaving like this, then the lower class has to be suffering from a chronic inferiority complex and low self esteem. It's instances like this that make them 'upper class" feel more important than you are.

lusc:

The other funny thing is if you leave in the UK, no one cares who your parents are. We all apply for that same £5.50 an hour job just to make some extra money in Uni. We all go to the same night club at the Westend and shop at Primark.

So is it just a Lagos thing?

i beg to disagree,which 5.50 job did tony blairs children do or the royal family?they dont even go to the same schl as ordinary briticos,they attend private schools like eton ans co where there is a waiting time of years and a rigorous interview before u will even be admitted in spite of your money, shebi if u have ur money u can still be easily admitted to any school in nigeria its all round the world

As far as am concerned, we are all one before GOD.

My friendship cuts all economic strata. I dont care if you are rich, or poor, as far as you have a pleasant character, we can be friends. If you choose your friends because of their wallet, well, it shows how shallow minded you are.

The thing is people just make friends for the wrong reasons

If you have friends that would look down on you, i mean are those FRIENDS?

There were some gals i knew in school, everytime someone asked for their addy, they would say

they are moving. . . ok so where are you staying NOW, we are moving sha. . . such phoniness!


Nigerians are very pretentious sha, that is a fact im sure of.

they r moving abroad lol
saw a naija movie where a gurl denied her dad in front of her friends point blank and later said the man is their gateman lol i think guys are more down to earth,its the girls that act all bougie most of the time