[b]Hi Chykeo

Again, thanks for intervening on this matter!  But, this has not changed my views about which side you bent towards and really, I don’t care one bit because, everyone here with good eyes could see the truth. You see some people on N/L are so immature and could easily get jealous of someone they’ve never met before – just one look is enough for their assumptions and conclusion on you but who cares?

Now, let me explain further, how unfair you are:

In the first place, you got it wrong even though you claimed to have read and re-read page 10 hundred and ten times, you are still wrong.  You said that Agathamari came complaining about her home situation and I responded negatively with the quote below instead of reassuring her:

Quote from: Theblessed on July 12, 2009, 01:38 PM
,If you haven't got a psychological problem of ATTACHMENT AND NEEDING TO BE LOVED (as a result of your childhood, lack of confidence and self esteem) why even think of such people let alone being in partnership with them?   Majority are only out to use you, can't you see that?  Or should I say, are there some common sense left upstairs or is it just an empty space up there? Why moan when you let yourself being used and abused by these bastards?  Because, you let your emotions cloud your God given common sense - you don't need a degree to get this you know!! You are either born with it or without as this is only showing that some of you have ZERO COMMON SENSE.  Please, stop moaning here?,  The signs are all there for you to see but you vehemently chose to ignored it and come to N/L to moan. 

To that I said you are wrong! To start with, I am not a Counsellor and don’t have to give my opinion if I don’t want to.  The above was a response to NALIJAH’S topic that  everyone was and still responding to not AGATHAMARI, pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase!  Yes, at first, I did see her posts but I avoided it because, it wasn’t the kind I respond to.

Actually, the post that led to all these was rather my response to Euchena; Check Quote from: Euchena on May 22, 2009, 12:02 PM who was responding to the post of NJEAN answering to Nalijah’s original post.  You see, I was no where near Agathamari’s issues.
It was from my commentary reassuring Euchena that Agathamari caught the flu that now, gave her bloody red nose when she decided to show me how knowledgeable of Asian women fanny she is by depositing this:


Quote from: agathamari on July 12, 2009, 01:47 PM
aparently you didnt know that oriental womens vag is tilted the oposite direction of everyone else.  from what i have been told white women are more adventurous in bed.  when was the last time you tied up your guy?  he'd like it


No offence I implied, everyone is entitled to give their views here without insulting others however, is this the with case with her write up above?  You claimed, she did not mean to offend really,? When she put down this 'when was the last time when you tied up your guy'. How dare you say that, when you hadn’t read between the lines? 

I have always said some people come to N/L to cause friction with others.  Such people are Demonically influenced and, she is one of them and in hindsight, I now regret responding to her. I could still hear the Holy Spirit in me telling me not to respond to the above in the first place but I went against and now, see where everyone is. 

Based on the above, and as she was so determined to convince me with her story, as a professional in this field, I needed CORE Evidence to be convinced.  Even, I overlooked her insult (see quote below) and did not respond to it instead, persisted on my need for Research Evidence. 

So, what’s wrong with that?  She could neither relent nor give me what I asked of her and, I persisted asking for my Research Evidence because, that’s the only criteria under which I would regard her story as CREDIBLE. As all this were going on, I maintained a civil stance without insults by any means and on seeing that, instead of her to give up, she continue to persuade me to adopt her way of thinking but Naaaaaaaaah! I wouldn’t have it and then she produced this:

Quote from: agathamari on July 13, 2009, 05:58 PM

@theblessed.  i said vagina not ass.  the vagina in most women point toward thier navel (use your finger to find out on yourself if you dont know already) oriental women point toward thier tailbones.  ask any ob-gyn who has had dealings with oriental women to find out. btw oriental men member
s have a slightly different muscle structure then other men as well. 

Again, I consider this an insult, asking me to use my finger to find her Head – how crude?

At one point, I even asked her to give up trying to convince me if she could not provide what I asked for, did she?  Obviously not, and I did not relent either (and I don’t give up easily as you now, know) that’s when she went on to produce this DOUBLE WAMMY:

agathamari 
Re: American Women That Marry Nigerian Men
« #312 on: July 15, 2009, 04:43 PM »
________________________________________
wow someone is a prude who doesnt know about anatomy.  if you dont want to listen to me i seggest you speak with a doctor who has treated an asian woman or a man who has slept with one. 

Imagine, calling me a ‘Prude’ because, she could not get into my head and that’s when I decided to sit her where she belong and there comes the INTERVENER, YOU!

Now, I am asking you again, since you claimed you did not take sides, that Agathamari meant well and did not mean to abuse and hurt why say all the above.  Are these the kind of words/language of a lady that meant PEACE? Maybe, in your dreams.

You have managed to portray her and the other guy (whom, I don’t even want to go into his own issues, right now) as the innocent victims on this matter and I, the trouble maker however, considering my democratic rights to say what I like, N/L can now see who are the actual trouble makers here – the two, including yourself who is siding with them.

In a Democracy, people are free to give their opinions (positive or negative) and that’s what I did, it may suck but that’s the nature of Democracy – LIKE IT OR LUMP IT! 

As a result of your unfairness, I am rubbing it in on your face by referring you to the FAMILY SECTION to see for yourself the negative attitudes (on my topic) of Demonic individuals like these two you are here defending.

Thanks for your unfairness!!![/b]

Nigerians! lol! Why do we derive soooooooo much pleasure in running ourselves down I really dont get it. Nigerian's are just so talented in this!
All thats left is to grab Lucieo by her ears and brand her with 'every Nigerian is a criminal'. And you are, ? An exception? Yeah! Right! lol!
When will people stop pinning labels on people just cos of their race, colour and whatnot?
Yes, there are fraudsters in Nigeria, thieves, Kidnappers, the whole band! But arent there all the above n even worse in other places too,
Could everyone in a country be evil? Then how come everyone in it isnt dead yet? I mean with such a high number of killers, fraudsters etc!

Now see my 'friend' above tagging Hausa men. That
1) they dont marry outside their tribe n
2) they dont marry women older than them.
N you know this for sure as who? Or wat? Their oracle?
lol! Its just so fucking absurd! Pls pardon my french but thats the only phrase colourful enough to duly address that!

Lucieo, it'll be wicked and inhuman of me not to remind you of the cons of plunging into marriage with a guy you just met in 3 months. A guy n not a 'Nigerian guy'. But since you really love this guy and you feel he's the one, why should i stand in your way, either physically or with spiteful and damaging words!

All i'll say is be careful. And keep your eyes open but dont close your heart. Just as most of them are saying its not for real, he must be a killer, a kidnapper, a fraudster, there could also be another side.
Finding someone you love and who loves you in return is a GIFT! It hardly comes twice in a lifetime. Consider that,
I wish you all the best! God's grace!

I don't know about all Nigerian Men, but the one I am dating is Crazy. He is hard to please. If he doesn't get his way he doesn't speak to me for a week. If he did not just lose his job and his mother. I would kick him to the curb.

Wow! Nigerian men must be the spice of foreign women’s life. I cannot believe we have one thread rolling into 19 pages about “Nigerian men sex and affairs: American women speak”, now we have another thread going into 11 pages about “American Women That Marry Nigerian men”.

One would have thought that any women coming here to post would be interested in reading the numerous pages of advice that already exist about what other women like themselves have to say about Nigerian men/husbands,

In addition, I am hoping Nigerians on the board are aware that many posting here are not interested in your advice but are only here to add to the stereotype of Nigerian men

ladies trust you intuition when dating. im sure your gut told you something was up when dating these men.

trust your gut and you won't go wrong.

Hello,
I am new on this site. I just stumbled on it, and was reading some previous post from different ones here, and my question is how do obtain a visa for my Nigerian friend? Is there anyway around the meeting clause?

Ms.D24:

Hello,
I am new on this site. I just stumbled on it, and was reading some previous post from different ones here, and my question is how do obtain a visa for my Nigerian friend? Is there anyway around the meeting clause?

Ask one Ms Patricia Daboh. She posted something here on this thread. I am sure she can be of help

I wanted to know what advice anyone has for an American woman who is involved with a Nigerian man who lives in a country outside of Africa in Europe. Does it make a difference. Also, in the earlier posts, someone said that men want to have children with American women so that they don't have to marry the women. Please clarify.

Hm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I wish the original poster of this thread would come around. I have some questins for her.

I AM AUSTIN FROM NIGERIA, 30 YEARS AND I REALLY LOVE TO MEET

A LADY THAT BASE IN OVERSEA AND WHO IS SINCERE IN MIND. IF

INTERESTED SHE CAN CONTACT ME ON MY MOBILE:+2348055968422 OR

EMAIL: omoaugustine@yahoo.com

I have been involed with a nigerian man online now for 8 months we are planning for our 1st meet in January he will come to the states. I am a white female and am deeply in  love with my man. I had been in the middle of being scamed by another man who was in nigeria when I met him. he tried everything to help me to see that I was being scamed but I just thought he was jealous and would not listen to him. as it turned out I was being scamed as he warned me but I did not beleave until I read a report from another female online that was scamed by the same man.
needless to say I ended that relationship. and now am in a relationship with the niga man whom tried to be my hero.  he truly does love me and unlike the other guy shows himself to me on webcam. i am looking forward to seeing where our relationship takes us. he tells me everyday how much he loves me. 

your story sounds very familiar. would you be willing to tell your true loves name? Have you ever sent him money or received money or packages for him?

My mans name is Raymond and no I have never sent him money or recieved packages from him. He dosen't ask for money he has his own he is a hard working man. The other man how ever that had scammed me ended up asking for money only after only knowing me for a week and continued taking money from me for many months. always having a some kind of problem why he could not get back to the US he claimed he was from Texas at the time but won a contract over in Nigeria for some engineer work involving working with crude oil and fixing oil lines. the scammers name was David and I did post his pic on romancescam.com But Raymond is a great guy and would never ask me for money and he soly supports me belonging to romancescams now I have educated myself and know when I am being scamed and would never send money or except checks ect, from anyone. I have also learned how to do ip checks so now I can tell when someone is lying about their location. I learned how to do the ip check through that website also.

Vicki 09:

My mans name is Raymond and no I have never sent him money or recieved packages from him. He dosen't ask for money he has his own he is a hard working man. The other man how ever that had scammed me ended up asking for money only after only knowing me for a week and continued taking money from me for many months. always having a some kind of problem why he could not get back to the US he claimed he was from Texas at the time but won a contract over in Nigeria for some engineer work involving working with crude oil and fixing oil lines. the scammers name was David and I did post his pic on romancescam.com But Raymond is a great guy and would never ask me for money and he soly supports me belonging to romancescams now I have educated myself and know when I am being scamed and would never send money or except checks ect, from anyone. I have also learned how to do ip checks so now I can tell when someone is lying about their location. I learned how to do the ip check through that website also.

eyah youve been througha lot.

I'm Nigerian and I'm still worried about marrying a Nigerian man. Its sad, really. Its either scamming or cheating with them, some of them sha.

Thread softly with Raymond

eyah youve been througha lot.

I'm Nigerian and I'm still worried about marrying a Nigerian man. Its sad, really. Its either scamming or cheating with them, some of them sha.

Thread softly with Raymond [quote][/quote]

yeah I'm watching carefully. makes you wonder why some of them if their not scamming their cheating. are jobs that really hard top come by in Nigeria that they have to scam or are they just to lazy to get a real job?

ok, so I'm new to this sight. I'm just simply trying to understand a few things. First let me say, I am posting this for true insight and advice. I'm 29 years old, previously divorced from an american guy with two kids from my marriage. For the past 2 years, ive been dating on and off and just recently i met a Nigerian (igbo) guy. He's 33 years old, He's an optometrist who resides in london. I, myself reside in the states (Georgia). I met this guy a few months back and there was no immediate pressure for a relationship, just great conversation and enjoying eachothers company. We laughed, talked about anything from serious issues to just being jovial with one another. i noticed almost immediately that he had a warm spirit, cared for other's feelings, very sentimental, and seemed very honest. He made it be known up front that he despised liars.As time passed he started telling me he loved me and i would verbally voice to him that that was impossible! he would say that he's met many of women and only few piqued his interest as i have, He tells me all the time that he feels ashamed that he's the only one in the family not married with kids, he feels like he's getting old, he's studied all his life, gotten three degrees and hasnt had time to work on relationships ( to lead to having a family) I recently, unwillingly, but naturally started to feel for him, i noticed that i'd become more open tohis feelings, i admit, i think i love him, well i do love him, i think he's wonderful. I'm a single parent, in nursing school and i work at a local hospital full time, He motivates me, he encourages me to challenge myself on a daily basis, almost as if he empowers me. He's asked me recently could we date, start a relationship, I said yes, He's paid for my passport and has asked me to go to nigeria to meet his parents, I've met his brother and a few friends, they are cool. I learned that he's told a couple of his co workers that he was engaged to me all because he was too embarrased to say that he was single at his age. i love him, gosh do i love him, he's beautiful! also, He recently paid for my transportation to and from london for a week in march to come spend time with him. He's constantly sending me things from london, all the time, clothes, cards,etc. Ive been reading the posts and u think you know  a person but you never know. He mentioned getting married and i said to him everyone knows that nigerians only want to marry for citizenship, he scoffed at me and said really? is that the stereotype in your country? and i said yes! he laughed hysterically and said i dont  need your citizenship, i truly care for you, i confronted him with some of the other stereotypes, nigerians being temperamental, dominant to their women, etc, he said wow, some of them are actually that way,especially yorubans, that they are promiscuous, his parents didnt teach me to be that way. He refers to most american men as "shitguys" because of how they treat us women, Can anyone give me some kind of insight, does he seem genuine in his efforts?

He said especially yorubans, huh? You sure he's Nigerianan?

This is my view on American women(both black and white).They are overweight,rude,nasty and dirty and the nag all the time and besides they dont know how to cook and lack home training.No right thinking nigerian would want to date an american woman.

tom28:

This is my view on American women(both black and white).They are overweight,rude,nasty and dirty and the nag all the time and besides they dont know how to cook and lack home training.No right thinking nigerian would want to date an american woman.

tom28:

This is my view on American women(both black and white).They are overweight,rude,nasty and dirty and the nag all the time and besides they dont know how to cook and lack home training.No right thinking nigerian would want to date an american woman.

Thanks

Any nigerian man who is running after an american woman is doing it for visa.American women are known for their rudeness and they are fond of using insultive words on their boyfriends or hubbys so god help u if u are a man from a developing country dating an american woman.To end it all this is how most american women tend to look
http://3.bp..com/_gcA0ZuKGkI8/SiBniAKc0aI/AAAAAAAABNc/vSqxCA4tzko/s400/fat_black_woman.jpg
http://ecoscraps.com/files/2008/05/obese-woman.jpg

Hello,

I do appreciate the culture of nigeians especially those in the north the only problem I had with north is that they are very sensitive toward religious stuff that is all, but at least no to much scam and frauds, instead begers.

tom28:

Any nigerian man who is running after an american woman is doing it for visa.American women are known for their rudeness and they are fond of using insultive words on their boyfriends or hubbys so god help u if u are a man from a developing country dating an american woman.To end it all this is how most american women tend to look
http://3.bp..com/_gcA0ZuKGkI8/SiBniAKc0aI/AAAAAAAABNc/vSqxCA4tzko/s400/fat_black_woman.jpg
http://ecoscraps.com/files/2008/05/obese-woman.jpg

ROFLMAO!

Just curious, how many American ( black/white ) women have you dated?
You sure sound bittered.

L.

I have been reading some of these post for some insight and heres my situation, let me know if I am being paranoid. I live in a small town in a southern state in the U.S., and yes I met a nigerian man online, with the expectation that it would eventually turn into a scam, but so far it hasn't. He received his master's degree here in the US, and has lived here for the past 7 yrs, and he works for an oil and gas company. He is a home owner, the oldest of 5 kids, has never asked me for money (he gives me money), he sends LOTS of money home, never married, no kids. I have never been married, I have no children either. He is 35, I am 30. We have been dating for almost a year and a half. Turns out he doesn't have permanent residency yet like I thought (he confessed this on his own), it was supposed to be ready by March. Apparently there is some law, he was originally here under the whole asylem reasons, but now this is the reason everything is delayed. He says even marrying him wouldn't fix the problem. He says he might have to move to Canada were the citizenship process is simpler. It sounds like this maybe indirectly due to the whole underwear bomber thing. This law, I don't know what it is called has something to do with if you have ever been part of an organization or group that opposed the government (in Nigeria) then you might not get permanent residency. He is from southern Nigeria, were there has been issues with the oil and gas companies polluting, and the government just takes kickbacks to look the other way. We live in the same town, we spend alot of time together and he makes me happy, he alludes to the whole marriage thing, but it hasn't been decided. He wants to bring his mother out here to visit first, as well as getting his brother out here for school. Does anyone know anything about this law? I assure you he is no a terrorist, he is a gentle Christen man. I just don't like the combination of the fact we met online (I never do that) and that he is from Nigeria. We are dating, but he is also my best friend, at the same time I am not the most trusting person, my last relationship (american man) was 8 yrs of hell, and he ruined me financially. Maybe I'm the one with issues, I don't know.

ok I have read many of the comments on this thread while some are pure ignorance, others were simply honest, 1-thing I would like to say is that in every race you have good and bad, rich and poor, intelligent and ignorant, educated and uneducated, and the list goes on and on but I hope you get my drift. I think it is wrong for any race to be judged as a whole on one person or a group of peoples actions, we are all individuals with our own individual mindsets and should be judged only by our deeds and not those of others and even then christlike love and compassion should be applied as we are all human and not perfect only God is. I am an african american young lady who was born and raised in the U.S. by a mother and a grandmother also born and raised in the U.S. and a Jamaican stepfather which looking at my family it is a mixture of everything, however I said that to say this my mom and grandmother always encouraged (forced) us to learn about our culture and who we really are to become whom we are destined to be and it went back to Africa. It is your responsibility to learn about yourself and it will benefit you a great deal to learn and take interest in other cultures now everything is not for everyone one but I feel we are blinded by lack of knowing and people tend to dislike what they don't understand. What I have also learned is that the U.S. will show the poorest parts of other countries and we have the same conditions here why you ask? because they want you to think this is the best place ever while it has its benefits other countries do as well

As you see I have alot to say concerning steortypes I really hate that all americans are not fat, and rude, but yeas there are some who choose to live that way. Now on to the relationship part I was married to a african before not nigerian and we didn't work because of family differences amongst other things, now I am in a relationship with a nigeran man whom I meet thru a mutual friend and he is wonderful, I have always been a cultural person so I take interest in other cultures especially my own so that is never an issue but I feel that if there a mutual respect and love for one another it's all love Nailjah (I hope I spelled correctly) thank you for this thread and big up Benin City for producing many intelligent and loving men and people everyone of them I know are beautiful,

who cares.

men, its not easy reading through all the posts. its fascinating indeed.

my conclusion; BIRDS OF THE SAME FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER.
                         LIKE BEGET LIKES.
                         YOU ONLY ATTRACT WHAT YOU ARE THE INSIDE.
                         YOU RECEIVED WHAT YOU ASKED FOR.
                          YOU ARE PAID IN YOUR OWN COIN.[pre][/pre]

I am a naija man living in naija, we come in different shapes, heights and color. if you want it god we give it out good but if you want it bad its your cup,

our girls will complain but they like us as we are, by the way na same mama born we.

anyway in a few months I jetting to the alter with my Niger delta beau, I am nwa nna gujuru ara afo.
they may not understand culture n its differences but we go make them understand we.

MONKEY NO FINE BUT IM MAMA LOVE AM SO.

PROUDLY NAIJA.

you mean to tell me that american women are still getting married to nigerian men lol

^^^Wat is wrong wit Nigerian Men marrying American Women?
I guess if u've d opportunity, u'll grab it wit both hands.
Lolololololo. . . . . . . . . .