DieDiamant: I've had enough of life.

onegig, angeldemivida you are needed here pls

DieDiamant: I've had enough of life.

Pour it out here... or you may talk with anyone you think you are comfortable with in private.

DieDiamant: I've had enough of life.

Yes Baby, we are here for you.
We are your friends, you can lean on our shoulders.
Whatever you do, don't hurt yourself okay Baby.
Sending you lots and loads of hugs.

Ariyke: thanks so much av been trying to be strong for my self but like I said its so frustrating

Yeah--

Ariyke: onegig, angeldemivida you are needed here pls

--but you were amazing when you posted this cause you put aside your own burden and was looking out for another person.
I once read that when you are going thru troubled times that it helps to kinda think of assisting others and i have put that into practice once upon a time in the past when i was down i visited a hospital where i spent time with others, shared and chatted and made friends.

Girl I went through a terrible lot for like 2 days now, this evening I nearly slumped and all i wanted to listen to is PM Dawn's "I d' die without you" just to calm my soul cause the song has a great calming effect.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZbF7wkSvE8

I'm sharing the song. You can ignore the lyrics and just let it calm your nerves. It will have you inhaling and exhaling stress out of your system as if your back is being massaged. It just helped me unwind a bit.

Sis Damante,
I checked your profile.
You are not doing bad at all, seems you are serving(NYSC) and I see you hustling for a part time job to add to it.
Don't feel down okay. The period after leaving school can be hectic/ Most of us passed thru that, you will overcome.

I will check back the thread tomorrow. Tired now.
I need a big hug and soothing words too. Don't we all need that.
Yeah, living ain't easy. We musn't forget that it is a blessing to be alive.

is there any one from asaba here?

Angeldemivida:


Yeah--



--but you were amazing when you posted this cause you put aside your own burden and was looking out for another person.
I once read that when you are going thru troubled times that it helps to kinda think of assisting others and i have put that into practice once upon a time in the past when i was down i visited a hospital where i spent time with others, shared and chatted and made friends.

Girl I went through a terrible lot for like 2 days now, this evening I nearly slumped and all i wanted to listen to is PM Dawn's "I d' die without you" just to calm my soul cause the song has a great calming effect.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZbF7wkSvE8

I'm sharing the song. You can ignore the lyrics and just let it calm your nerves. It will have you inhaling and exhaling stress out of your system as if your back is being massaged. It just helped me unwind a bit.

thanks much really appreciate

You have to bt put ur budden aside and lend a helping hand when u see others passing tru more than urs bt I doubt hers more than mine cus.... Well I rest my case sha.

Av learnt to live each day as it comes

Angeldemivida:
I will check back the thread tomorrow. Tired now.
I need a big hug and soothing words too. Don't we all need that.
Yeah, living ain't easy. We musn't forget that it is a blessing to be alive.

May you be granted strength from the inner man. You will not faint in the time of adversity.

It is well with you.

thank you and God bless you richly

MadCow1:


[b]Hmmm!


This one is strong...


Okay.. Lemme give this my best shot. It's not easy I am sure as I can't possibly relate to your situation, however I will still try.

You need to snap out of your depression and refocus your life on you and your kids.
Inner strength is what you need to dig deep within yourself to find. Your kids need you very much. Putting on all that weight can't possibly be healthy and except your ultimate plan is to get sick and die, leaving behind your kids for this Man you described to raise, then you need to refocus and do so fast.

I am a strong advocate of 'tears therapy'. Crying always somehow relives a lot of the burdens we carry, particularly the emotional aspect of that burden. Get the tears out of the way and have a lighter heart and a clearer mind. Then restrategise and refocus all your energy on you. Start going to the gym, get a workout routine sorted and stick to it religiously. Get back into shape and treat this like a project. Regain your self confidence and start to love yourself in your skin again. If you are a stay at home mum with little kids, find something outdoors that you can do with your kids or even better, in a group with other women. As you start socializing and meeting new peoples, you would start to feel alive again. If your kids are grown and at school, try getting a job or even starting up a business. Basically, keep your mind busy on something highly challenging, fun and productive. An idle mind is more susceptible to depression than an active one.

Your kids.. Center your life around them and live for them. Engross yourself in raising them and wrap yourself up with them. Use them to find comfort and joy within yourself and your home.

Treat your husband nicely and act like everything is well. If you ever catch him in a lie, with calm and poise, tell him the contradiction in what he said without calling him a lair outrightly.

Example: Bolaji, I thought yesterday you said the stain on your trousers were from the pap that spilled on you during lunch at work, how come today you are saying it's from engine oil?

Ask for the cheating, there isn't that much you can do about that. However, you can work your way back into being a sexyass Vixen and have people admire your look and pray that he realizes just how much he has and why he needs no other woman. If he doesn't, no problem. Being over weight wouldn't help bring your husband back into your arms.

Now despite all I have written, if you know within yourself after some deep thought that you can't deal with the situation you currently find yourself in and that your depression is getting worse, please opt out lest you die there. Get a lawyer and file for divorce and get the courts to award you maintenance (alimony) according to the marriage act of Nigeria.

I never advice seeing a pastor as they tend to over spiritualize a non spiritual problem.

You can talk to either of your parents that is understanding and reasonable enough otherwise, don't do it at all. I have a friend whose father keeps sending her back to her abusive husband because he believes a woman should never leave her matrimonial home no matter what.

If you are spiritual like most Nigerians, you can pray.. I can encourage this as I think prayer can also be a form a of therapy.


In summary, refocus on other important aspects of your life that are within your control like; your weight, your kids and your general well being. Being depressed does nothing to help your case and may lead you to a very low point and in the end, your kids would suffer.

Goodluck.. [/b]

am a guy of 20 i dnt feel like dieing o but this THING is still eating me up... Lemme begin...i slept with my bestfriend gf which he loves so much..me and my bestfrnd neva talked abt it and hez still currently dating the girl and also my very good friend also am a frnd to the girl and we all relate with eachoda like it neva happend..by the way she lured me to doing it..and den i thought my frnd does nt love her as at then because he flirts alot but later he confided in me dat he loves her more than anything because then they had issues(not on my own matter) and i was like he should free her but he told me he loves her..wats bothern me is that she told him i raped her..immediatly d thing happen because i was sober after d incident..and d fact is dat was my first time of having sex.. I was scared because she told me dat night she doesnt wanna have sex and two days b4 she sent me msgs dat we should have sex i tout i was a joke until she said she was not joking dat she meant all shez saying(worst thing it was a 2go msg..i dnt have d msg has prove)..dat night on the bed anytime i move close to her wil say i shuld stop..i would actually stop but she will come closer to me wit her body..i culd nt resist her i had sex with her and she dint try to stop me but just keep say its not good..after dat night d following day i sent msg to my frnd dat i had bleeped up he askd wat i did but i said nothing.when he resumed(me and hez gf resumed b4 him and d thing happen b4 during dat time)hez gf told him i raped(but nt sure if she told him i wanted to rape or i raped her. because he called and askd me if it was true and i said no..and i asked to see him then but he didnt allow me..after sum weeks i saw him in school with hez gf..we acted lyk nothing happend till today..by the way i went to church to pray we God should take over the matter because we r very good friends from home our parents knws each other self..but what remain misery to me is dat we neva talked abt d matter facetoface..and we r still very very good friends.

Well, i might not hav d liver to take my own life coz of biblical injunctions buh am seriously wishing to get knocked down to death by a vehicle or shot in d head by stray bullets one of these days. infact these days anytime i wakeup in d morning i feel angry n lousy. i get angry for not dying in my sleep or smthing..i mean am fed up..so fed up, f*ckin fed up..fed up, fed up n fed up!!!!! oh....gosh!! These are some of the reasons;

1. i feel i really suck. i hate everythin abt my body n stature.

2. Gosh..i hate life. it is so unfair(i cant say more...but i hate it)

3. i hate my siblings. all of them n my dad. they hav all disappointd me. my mum is okay..but i am tired of seeing her go thru so much hardship.

4. All my passions have been dashed coz of LACK n poor living conditions. nothing to keep the fire in me anymore. no fun, no laughter n no hope. Church isnt even helping matters coz they all want us to have faith n hope in God inspite of the weather, so i cant even talk to any of them. i am tired of hopin n prayin n sowing seeds...things arnt wrkin!!

5. i am tired of fighting n hating myself for having feeling for guys lik me. it started wen i was molested by an older classmate bak in boardin sch( i curse dat day). All thru my uni days i fought it n yet the feelings wudnt go away and now i am gradually becoming bisex(sobs).

6. i hate Nigeria. i want to leave this country. i dream of living in a ranch in a countryside in europe or close to a beach in a saner society whre human rights ar respected. living conditions are better, a place whre bribery n corruption isnt the order of the day.

7. i wanna write poetry n fiction again. i want to sing again...i want a bohemian life. i want to marry a fine woman. i want to be happy. i want to further my education. i want to take up responsibilities. i am tired of what Nigeria is giving me.

IF I LIVE AND GROW OLD, I WOULD BUILD A FOUNDATION TO CATER FOR DEPRESSED PEOPLE. I FEEL SO HORRIBLE.

hector: Well, i might not hav d liver to take my own life coz of biblical injunctions buh am seriously wishing to get knocked down to death by a vehicle or shot in d head by stray bullets one of these days. i am fed up..so fed up, f*ckin fed up..fed up, fed up n fed up!!!!! oh...., but why do i feel this way u may ask? Well these are some of the reasons;

1. i feel i really suck. i hate everythin abt my body n stature.

2. Gosh..i hate life. it is so unfair(i cant say more...but i hate it)

3. i hate my siblings. all of them n my dad. they hav all disappointd. my mum is okay..but i am tired of seeing her go thru so much hardship.

4. All my passions have been dashed coz of LACK n poor living conditions. nothing to keep the fire in me anymore. no fun, no laughter n no hope. Church isnt even helping matters coz they all want us to have faith n hope in God inspite of the weather, so i cant even talk to any of them. i am tired of hopin n prayin n sowing seeds...things arnt wrkin!!

5. i am tired of fighting n hating myself for having feeling for guys lik me. it started wen i was molested by an older classmate bak in boardin sch( i curse dat day). All thru my uni days i fought it n yet the feelings wudnt go away and now i am gradually becoming bisex(sobs).

6. i hate Nigeria. i want to leave this country. i dream of living in a ranch in a countryside in europe or close to a beach in a saner society whre human rights ar respected. living conditions are better, a place whre bribery n corruption isnt the order of the day.

7. i wanna write poetry n fiction again. i want to sing again...i want a bohemian life. i want to marry a fine woman. i want to be happy. i want to further my education. i want to take up responsibilities. i am tired of what Nigeria is giving me.

IF I LIVE AND GROW OLD, I WOULD BUILD A FOUNDATION TO CATER FOR DEPRESSED PEOPLE. I FEEL SO HORRIBLE.

wow. Are you telling God that he made a mistake. My dear things hapen for a reason. That saying will keeop me going anyday anytime. There was a time I failed I nearly wanna die but do you knw wat suprised me I FAILED TO EXCEL true life story. Forget about church for now. Go and cry to jesus in your personal room keep away from everthing and everybody when you do so. Pray for atleast 30min with an open heart tell him all yours sin. Be friends with him and I promise you u will be suprise what he will do.

This is a really nice thread...a thumbs up for yuh guys.......I used to be suicidal,but thanks to God,all dose thoughts have left my mind,and I only have possitive thoughts now!!! Its not like things are any better,but am just trying to kip on encouraging maself...hope to share a testimony here soon

.

I'm suffering from depression. Though I'm not thinking suicidal, but I'm fed up with so much thinking. Mind is not at rest, everything feel strange, I'm fighting it but it seems I need support. I need help urgently.

Excelboi: I'm suffering from depression. Though I'm not thinking suicidal, but I'm fed up with so much thinking. Mind is not at rest, everything feel strange, I'm fighting it but it seems I need support. I need help urgently.

What are the issues you feel maybe the cause of your sadness or current feelings? Talking about them is a first step to get a solution. Care to share? I have seen your id pretty lots of time and from your postings i can deduce you are a happy person. So i guess this is just a lil stumble you can work on.

Elxandre... I read that story of yours back then bro. I understand your fears. But wait... Any resolution to this issue since you said it was widespread? Have you gone to the school to make complaints or do something about it? Do you have anyone pulling things for you? We are in a country where things are upside down.

onegig: What are the issues you feel maybe the cause of your sadness or current feelings? Talking about them is a first step to get a solution. Care to share? I have seen your id pretty lots of time and from your postings i can deduce you are a happy person. So i guess this is just a lil stumble you can work on.

Do you mind dropping your whatsapp number or BBM pin or anything I can contact you on.

Excelboi: Do you mind dropping your whatsapp number or BBM pin or anything I can contact you on.

Just send me a pm

onegig: Elxandre... I read that story of yours back then bro. I understand your fears. But wait... Any resolution to this issue since you said it was widespread? Have you gone to the school to make complaints or do something about it? Do you have anyone pulling things for you? We are in a country where things are upside down.

The issue is a massive one, with a lot of people affected.
The exam was surely not difficult this year. The issue I heard is the schools fault. No one is clear on cause of this issue.
There's a guy working in the school who promised to help,,I'm just hoping bro. I really hate this ' Man know man syndrome', that's why I worked so hard, but now,I have to hope ironically.

ihedioramma: is there any one from asaba here?

Though am aint from asaba but a deltan

There is a light at the end of the tunnel

Good morning peeps.

I just want those feeling suicidal that their problem cannot last till the end of time.

After the darkest part of the night approaches, surely, what shall follow is daylight.

All what you're going through or even worse is happening to some other people around the world. Just appreciate God for the gift of life and live everyday as if you're alive to fulfill a very important wish no one can fulfill you.

One best way of navigating out of depression is to help those facing similar problem overcome theirs. Help then with kind word and motivate them- this act is the proverbial finger pointing, where you point a finger to someone else and have the remaining fingers pointing at You.

Today is Monday. You know what that mean right? Go out and find possible solution to your problems because you are not better of in seclusion.

Abuklaw: Good morning peeps.

I just want those feeling suicidal that their problem cannot last till the end of time.

After the darkest part of the night approaches, surely, what shall follow is daylight.

All what you're going through or even worse is happening to some other people around the world. Just appreciate God for the gift of life and live everyday as if you're alive to fulfill a very important wish no one can fulfill you.

One best way of navigating out of depression is to help those facing similar problem overcome theirs. Help then with kind word and motivate them- this act is the proverbial finger pointing, where you point a finger to someone else and have the remaining fingers pointing at You.

Today is Monday. You know what that mean right? Go out and find possible solution to your problems because you are not better of in seclusion.

suicidal tendencies should not be overlooked in a moment. I read of someone being suicidal at childhood but finalised it at 67 or so. I have been on this thread before, and I received support, big one o. My experience was so bad that I wrote my suicidal note. I cried morning and night, surprisingly for no reason at all. Talk of extreme sadness.
. I came here and some angels came to my rescue. I was made but not whole. I say this because this help you guys give shouldn't end here. Reach out to them like some did to me and like I'll start doing too. Nice one onegig.
They told me to be that Change I need and I did. And life is going smoothly, even tho not perfect as I want it to be and I pray against a fall back. To All my friends out there,
TRY AND BE THAT
CHANGE
YOU NEED!!

Les, wetin "f" dey do beside ya moniker? U do da "DO"!

Idowuogbo: Les, wetin "f" dey do beside ya moniker? U do da "DO"!

what do you think I meant when I said " they told me to be the Change I need and I did" les don change full time all the mentions I receive Na "f" mention, me don tire, I say make I give them wetin dem want Na. nne were u been Na

I guess those who are on extended use of sleeping pills need to watch out.

http://m.bbc.com/news/health-29127726

Anxiety and sleeping pills 'linked to dementia'

When I woke up this morning I wished I didn’t and almost seriously wished there was poison in the house so I could reach for it and ingest some. I don’t know I’m going to purchase poison and do it anyway – I think I still retain some of the religious stuff learned back in the day about suicide being very bad and I can’t bear to think of what it will do to my mother. I wish an accident would just happen and take me away.

Every day you wake up and look at the dump yard face to face room. Then you go to be bossed around by those you have to help out with anything that requires brain work. Then you go on Facebook and see classmates that were far far behind you in school occupying important positions. Then your shoes are out and you want to buy but remember house rent is due this month ending. Then you run into an old pal and he asks how come you are not yet married. And then wonder, why is life so tough for me? Even, why didn’t God just make me like one of those regular people are happy with their little means of livelihoods – you know, an IQ of 70 with big muscles to carry cement and earn a little money and have no care in the world? But no, school I didn’t go. Yet if I carry cement or drive okada I will fall ill.

I’m male. I will be forty in a couple of years. Nothing has ever worked out for me. I think even God made mistakes when he was making me because the smallest things everyone takes for granted – making friends, hardiness, etc. - are hard for me. Even ordinary school I couldn’t/can’t go. So I’m stuck in a small administrative job that can’t provide a basic apartment after covering transport.

Until about age 10 things were okay. We weren’t rich but we didn’t lack. Then the military came to power and the colonel sent to our state decided the civil service needed to be pruned. And my father was so pruned. The world just turned upside down and has not flipped back till today. Nearly three decades after, I’m yet to get out of it. Don’t get me wrong - I’m not blaming anyone. I know I ought to have changed things by now. I’m sure you know people who had things very bad but went on to be successful. But I guess God did not make me with whatever it is it takes to do that. I don’t know, but I just can’t seem to find the combination. God also didn’t give me the attributes to survive in Nigeria because I can’t hurt anyone – I can’t bring myself to deceive, cheat or steal even when the opportunity arises yet almost everyone seems to get by through dishonest means in this country. I can’t push someone out of the queue to get to the front and it seems you have to do that sort of thing to “make it”.

I’m still single. I want to be married – I’m sick of being alone. But I’m too broke to seriously consider it so I have refused to make any effort to go into a serious relationship. On the one or two occasions I mustered up some courage to give it a try the outcome was ghastly. The last one told me I can’t meet up with her financial needs so it wasn’t going to be me and her – she said so in so many words. Maybe it was just as well because I have always promised myself I will not bring forth kids under the circumstances I can afford now. I don’t want to bring a woman into it either.

When I finished primary school there was no money for secondary school so I was sent to a vocational school. You can probably tell from my writing that I’m not exactly a lightweight in book matters. Well, I later read for O' levels on my own and got the required 5 credits. I gained admission into the university at 24. I could not meet up with my financial requirements. Unluckily for me, things affect me very easily – if sleep late for several nights going, I fall ill; if I drink more beer than I should, I fall ill; when I get depressed, I fall ill. I crashed out after part II first semester as financial problems and anxieties sent me into depression.

Since then I have tried my hands a business or two but when you’re poor at networking it’s hard to attract funding and be on your own unless you have a solid capital base. I have also tried to use my skills at writing and editing to earn a living but not much has come from that since I have no networks.

I am currently back at university reading from home for a degree. Now, I can’t stand it anymore and want to abandon it and take off somewhere. At part I semester 1, I did 12 course and the result was 8As and 4 Bs. But last semester, that is, part IV semester 1, I did just six courses out of which I had 2 Es and 2Fs – that should tell you the mental state I’m in. I’m terribly depressed and don’t know how I will cope with the forthcoming exams and then 500L.

I guess I’ve rambled enough.