Pls nairalanders, I have an issue I want all of you to respond to and advise me. Pls after reading this, try and make your honest contributions and advise me on what you think. Pls bear with me because the story may be a bit long because I want to state virtually all the necessary details for you to know how to advise on this. This is because it is necessary to have the full details in some cases before one can reach a conclusion on the issue.

I'm a final year student in the university. I believe in true love. I want a girl I can call my own, my love, my heart, my sweetheart, somebody I can fall in love with and who will fall in love with me too. My course is highly demanding and I hardly have time for myself. I'm handsome & girls admire me a lot. Many girls want me but I sometimes ignore some of them. But I just want true love,somebody who will love me for who I am.

Recently, about one month ago, I met a girl I so much love but I don't know if she loves me. I saw her pictures and profile on facebook and I instantly fell in love with her. This has never happened to me before. I have never fallen in love so deeply this way before. I so much loved her instantly that I desired to chat her up. I just fell in love with her pictures. I sent her chat messages,she didn't reply. I searched her phone number on her profile and called her. We talked and I told her how I felt about her. We later agreed that I should come visit her at her place, because I wanted us to meet.

But I noticed that she usually drops the calls on me and doesn't allow me to say all I want to say before she cuts the call. I felt it's just because we hadn't met. One day she called me for the first time, which she had never done before, but I wasn't able to pick because I was asleep cos I had read throughout the night till 6am before I slept. Later around 9am when I woke up, I saw her missed call & called her. She said she wanted to tell me something, that can we chat on facebook now? I said ok. I was so happy she was showing interest in me or so I thought. So I went online and we chatted and she asked me if we could meet. She said there was something she wanted to tell me but it will be impolite for her to tell me on that medium(facebook chat medium). I was glad she wanted us to meet.

So I told her on the chat that since she wanted to see me urgently(earlier than the time we scheduled for me to go and see her) then I would come & see her the following day. That day I set out to go and informed her I was on my way but while I was in the bus & was like halfway to her place, I called her & she told me she was sorry that we couldn't see again & that she was on her way to somewhere & she dropped the call. I called her several times to know if she was joking but she refused to pick my calls.I was so surprised and annoyed but I had to go back to my place.

The following day I called her & she said she was sorry for what happened the previous day. Remember that at this time, we still had never met. She now told me on phone that she was running a program somewhere and she needed me to borrow her ten thousand naira (N10,000) which she will give me the following week. I told her I don't have,but I will try to get from someone. So I collected the money from a friend and that same day she came to my house to collect it. That was the first time I set my eyes on her and I still loved her as I saw her! It was really amazing to me that I could fall in love this way.

Immediately she collected the money, she virtually stopped picking my calls. She hardly picked my calls but I persisted. She still continued dropping calls on me. I still loved her anyway. Later when I called her one day, she asked me to come see her at her place. I went to see her and although she delayed me and I had to wait at the fast food joint where she asked me to wait, for about 3 hours before she finally joined me there because she was making her hair.

This was our second time of meeting. Immediately she came, she ordered for fast food for both of us to the cost of N4,000 (four thousand naira). Although I felt within me this was unnecessary waste of money which would have been used for better things. She paid for it since she made the order. Although my initial plan was to buy drinks for both of us but since she took the lead, I just decided to leave that for another day. We talked and I told her how I cherished her. She said she was struck by my patience and that even when she insulted me on phone I did not insult her back and that if it were other men, they would have said she was proud. I told her I can't remember she insulted me. The fact was that she must have really done so but I couldn't remember because I was madly in love with her.

According to her,the money she lent from me was to add to her school fees since she was to write her final exams that week. She later said she had written the exams and I congratulated her. After our meeting at the fast food joint, which was near her house according to her, it became difficult to communicate with her. Although I don't know her house up till now. She again hardly picked my calls. So I started sending her love messages, very powerful love messages because I love her. But after about 2 days of sending those messages(one in the morning and another in the evening),she then sent me a text & asked me to stop sending her those messages. I was surprised but had no option & stopped as she said. I still loved her. I still continued to call but she never picks.

About 3 days later, because of the feelings I had for her, I went to her facebook page and posted a beautiful flower on her wall. Immediately she saw it,she sent me a rude text asking me never to post such on her wall again. I was so surprised again at her behaviour.She immediately deleted the flower from her wall. I felt within me that even if she didn't like what I did,she would have told me politely & I will understand & won't do it again.

By this time I started feeling she didn't love me. She didn't pick my calls, she didn't want me to send her text messages and she didn't want me to communicate with her on facebook. What do I do now? But I still loved her but the love was now reducing because of her very very hostile attitude towards me. She never said anything about the money I borrowed her which she was supposed to return.

By now I decided to just leave her alone for some time. After a week, she now sent me a text that she was sorry that she was going through some "stuffs",that was why she couldn't pick my calls. I was happy when I saw the text on that Sunday afternoon, thinking she was genuinely interested but I never knew it was because she needed another money. I later called her and we talked, and she later told me on phone that she needed another ten thousand naira(N10,000) urgently to do her clearance that I should borrow her and she will give me everything together with the previous ten thousand naira on Wednessday of that week. She lamented on phone that she had some money on her that week but spent it lavishly and now she needed N10,000 badly. When she said this, I knew she must be extravagant judging from the way she spent money the other day at the fast food joint.

I had N10,000 which I wanted to use & pay for my final year project(typing, binding, etc) and I was supposed to use the money the following day for that purpose but because of the love I had for her and because she said she would pay everything on Wednesday that week, I then went and paid it (N10,000) to her account which she sent to me the following day. The total money I borrowed her now is N20,000(twenty thousand naira).

But immediately she got it, the following day which was Tuesday, she hardly picked my calls again. It became difficult to reach her. But on Wednesday morning, she called me asking me if she can come to my place. I was happy and told her to come. She said she was going to her sister's place and wanted to see me before proceeding. While on the way, she sent me a text that she was on her way and that she didn't have much on her for transport. This meant that I should find her some money. I understood what she meant.

When she came, I tried to find out more about her. She told me she was working in a company(a firm) and we discussed other things. When she wanted to charge her set & brought out her charger, a car charger fell from her bag & I asked her how come she's having car charger in her bag when she doesn't have a car, but she told me that she has a car. When she was going I gave her one thousand naira (N1,000) for transport.

She now said she would pay into my account the total money she borrowed from me, N20,000 on the following day, which was Thursday. But since she left, it became difficult to communicate with her again up till now. To the extent that when I called her to know how her trip was, she was just shouting at me on phone. It is now two weeks since she promised to pay me back the money but she has not done so.

My friend who borrowed me the first N10,000 which I gave her is already disturbing me that he needs his money. Also, my project work is being delayed which I need to submit as my supervisor is asking me to submit it latest by next week. And I already gave her the money I'm supposed to use for my project hoping that she will return everything at the time she promised.

As for this babe, I noticed that she spends money extravagantly and I'm not comfortable with this because I hate wastage or spending on what you don't need. And I'm beginning to think that is why she's always lacking money and needing more money despite she is working in a good company and she has a car. But she knows I'm a student. But if I have money,I would definitely give her. And from the way she was behaving after she got back from her sister's place,it showed perhaps she wanted me to leave the whole of that money for her so that she won't pay me back. She was avoiding my calls just as she had always done.

And when she sent a text that suggests she may not want to pay back that money: "ok ... I will pay you your money..." , as if I should leave the money for her which is not possible with the way things are for me now being a student and my course is very expensive to run, with expensive textbooks & materials.

I'm now totally confused. Is it a crime to fall in love? Is it bad to do good to somebody by borrowing her money and now she doesn't want to pay back? And my own studies is now being threatened? But I still love this girl but the love I have for her is now reducing everyday the more she delays in paying me back my money and the more I can't communicate with her. If I call her now she rejects the call or doesn't pick at all.

As I'm writing this, I've not spoken with her for the past one week. Last week when she managed to pick her call after rejecting it severally, she said she would pay it this week. Today, being the last day of the week for going to the bank, I called her this morning, she rejected it and later sent me a text that she will pay it today ''by the grace of God" but it's already past 4pm and no alert on my phone yet.

Sorry if I'm boring you people with stories but I just want to express how I feel. Is love all about money? I really love this girl and I told her but she's really breaking my heart with all her behaviour. She is a matured girl and and I'm a matured guy too, so we are not kids. But I'm surprised the way she's behaving. Even if she doesn't have the money yet,she can plead with me and I will understand and at least she is supposed to pick my calls. Even if she wants to pay in installments,no problem, but I just want to keep the communication open between us. I still love her despite her behaviour and hoping she will change.

Pls Nairalanders, my questions are as follows. Pls kindly respond with maturity and no insults because we are all here to learn, nobody is above mistake.

1. Do you think she loves me? (Although I still love her but not like before.)

2. Is it right or wrong for a girl to ask a guy for money(or borrow money from a guy) on the first day they met? That is, a guy she is just meeting for the first time. And for the girls/ladies/women in the house, if it is right or wrong, can you do this?

3. Do you think I should continue with this girl?(because I have not seen any sign in her that shows she loves me).

4. How do you think I can get my money back from her because I'm in a total fix now?

5. For the guys in the house, has any of you been in this kind of situation before? And if you have experienced this before or something similar,how did you handle it?

Thanks for your understanding and God bless you all.

Gosh!
Being in love should not make you a fool. I choose not to speak on this. To your answers:
1. No, she is using you. She aint interested in you.
2. No. More reason to prove my first answer.
3. No. Continue this way? Maybe this is the first time you are "falling in love".
4. Lol, forget that one. Thats super story.
5. Never! Never again! Not that foolish(no offence meant).

I want to call you a MUGU but I feel so sorry for you. You Lent money to someone you do not know where they live? That is the first error! Are you a learner? My guy just count your losses and move on. She s obviously not taking you seriously, she is not in love with you, and she is likely to ask for more money later and start playing the same games!!!!

A word is enough for the wise! Shine your eyes Hun x

No, this is not the first time I'm falling in love but she totally overwhelmed me. She kind of comes close to the type of girl I want. But I'm beginning to doubt her behaviour now.

Nairaland don turn Prophetic-land wey every body go cm dey ask person questions wey no get ansa.


Sori if I sound rude...


We dey d girl mind 2no weda she go pay u bac or weda she love u n all oda mumu questions u d ask? No vex sha bt u b real ode!

Luvluv47: No, this is not the first time I'm falling in love but she totally overwhelmed me. She kind of comes close to the type of girl I want. But I'm beginning to doubt her behaviour now.

love can think! Love can reason.... Infatuation cant do any of the two. You see her and you love her. You did not take out time to get to know who she really is.
I hope your eyes would be clear before you get into a big mess.

1) she does not love you, she's clearly using you.
2) It's unwise to borrow money to a girl you've never met before.
3) It's obvious this girl has no interest in you, stop wasting your time.
4) I doubt you'll ever get the money back.

I'm trying so hard not to insult you right now. You spent your project money on some girl you've never met before... What the hell is wrong with you??
What bloody love are you speaking of??
How is it possible to fall in love with a girl just by seeing her picture?? Forget all those c.rap you see in movies, s.hits like that don't happen in reality.
What is of importance now is your studies it's not a necessity at this point/time to find "the one", that time will come quite alright.
I do hope you learn from this and by the way if a girl you've never met should ask you for money it's clear she has no interest in you.
Set your priorities straight.
God bless

Long epistle, someone should pls abridge it.

U're a f0ol.. Final year dat u're supposed 2be smart and face ur stress 4 d last time, u're borrowing money 2 satisfy a girl. Dats wat ur parents sent u 2schl 2do. And u even had d guts 2come on public forum 2blab.. U sure deserve some mending. Iti akwu!!

Thanks so much for all your contributions. More contributions expected.

Apart from the literature section, I doubt if i've ever read that long an epistle on Nairaland before but I read this one!

I wanted to stop at a point as the thing dey begin turn my tummy upside down but I finished it.
And after going through all of it, before I can talk truth and better thing, I need to first of all blast this op!
Guy, you be correct MUGU, MAGA! Repeat after me- MUGU and MAGA!
Wetin dey do ya head? You borrowed money from another person to lend a total stranger? In the name of love
You used your project money to take care of girl that doesn't even know jack about you-In the name of love
Heck! you don't even know what love means, a lady that you only saw her pictures on facebook and you guys have not communicated meaningfully, and you say she's all you need-what exactly do you need, pray tell me!

Just so that i'm a lil nice, I can't answer all those questions you outlined up there but the truth is that YOU'RE REALLY REALLY SILLY FOR THE WHOLE THING! There's nothing like love here, the girl is just using you and he be lyk say you also need to do some yanshing, so, your head no dey work well again!





Oh no, dt wasn't too nice!
op, forget about the lady and take that N20,000 as your offering for the month of July. Move on with your life, when you find love, it wouldn't be this difficult!

The last of the Mukites!! From Mukinafaso! Pele ti e

Luvluv47: Thanks so much for all your contributions. More contributions expected.

You still need more advice, huh? May God help you if this thread makes it to the frontpage

jmoore:
You still need more advice, huh? May God help you if this thread makes it to the frontpage

Dear OP kudos. Your storyline is very interesting. If you actually experienced this, then you should look up the word 'love' ASAP cos u dont know a jot about love. My dear, forget that money and never tell ur friends about it. Mugu fall...

Kai! You fall hand complete , you no even remain anything but that money don go kpata kpata

M sure dat gurl is smoking weed!!!op aren't u a nigerian,datz wat naija gurls r capable of doing...bt 4 wat itz worth u ate out of dat #4000 food na,lolz,on a more serious note,i fink u sud 4get abt dat gurl,delete ha numba and 4get she exist jare...God wud provide money 4 ur project..meanwhile thnk me 4 reading ur novel

don't worry.most guys go through similar experiences before they learn.All these would help harden ur heart when dealing with d daughters of Eve...meanwhile SEARCH FOR tai2's thread and read up,it would help u a lot.

U are a 1st class MUGU datz all.

I never knew dat guyz lyk dis still exist in this world at this jet age...dude u were either jazzed or a foo l from birth and I rest my case...I love d part dat u were saying "I still love her"lyk 10 times hahahaha...lover boy

If it were not that I read this, If you were telling me face to face, I would have Punched your MUMU face.

Wow!!! Fvck love....tbh if a girl asks me for money the first time we meet, i won't call her again, and you know the answers to all these your questions so i'll just advice you to move on with your life and don't ask her for the money again.

Your feelings are questionable towards her.
She doesn't love you. She is just using you.
She isnt responsible.probably using other guys too. Just forget the money and let it be a lesson.

front page please. The OP really needs advice. Damn! Give babe my project money? My babe sef go ask weda I dey well. SMH

this story of yours is so irritating and annoying....... You keep saying you love her,you love her over n over.... This is not love,it is stupidity and you know it

i comment my reserve...lolz.

Op you are cupid the greek god of love and unfortunately for u,u shot yourself in the azz.

i'm sure you're attending a private uni...cuz na them fit habour abudul-MUMU-ni like u

Now listen up y'all.

Yes we are all tempted to call him maga or mugu. Yes, but at end of it all, he is going to become a monster. Why do I say so? Because I have been there and done that.

I used to be like this guy, believing in love and doing everything for the one I love till I met a lady who did me strong thing back in uni. It took me almost 4years to get over her.

Then I changed.

I promised girls marriage just to FVCk them and dump them. I remember one chick that fell desperately in love with me sotay I carried out my darkest sexual fantasies on her and she allowed me just because of love.

She actually believed that I was going to marry her cos of all the steps I took in deceiving her. I dumped her like a rag full of shyt. She is still unmarried today and broken.

Please ladies, if you know you are not interested, just let the guy know and move on. You will create a monster if you do otherwise.

Such monsters like I became were made and not born.

Sheet!!.I can't believe my Ex is still in the business.. Seriously Joy, i think its time you stopped scamming innocent dudes. I forgave you, but this OP might not

Sorry op but you are a dignified mugu-infact your mumulity is unrivaled.
How could you do this to yourself? Oh runs girl don finish your poor brain.
Take this advice delete the number of that girl and find a way to pay your friend back the money and also find a way to do your project-count that 20k as a loss and a price for your magaism.
Dont ever in your life love this way again, use your brain there is more to love than meets the eye. I have never insulted anyone on nl this way before you are the 1st cuz your post pissed me off big time. ah