bellong:
PS: Thought you believed she was godly but you allowed her to cohabit with you. For her to agree in cohabiting with you is enough proof that she is only religious and not godly. If you want a godly union, cohabitation is a wrong foundation to build it. I am sorry if I misinterpreted that part you said you have sent her packing out of your house.

this is one of the reasons why the op is finding it difficult to let her go, the op himself, as godly as he claim to be do not see anything wrong with cohabitation, which is a sure sign of faulty foundation, and secondly, he has taken the forbidden fruit with her, hence, his confusion. He doesnt want the girl to accuse him of being used and dumped, but marriage is more than that, remember it's till death do you part, except you believe otherwise. A broken engagement is better that a broken marriage, IMO.


op, seek for forgiveness from God and from her, tell her you can no longer cope with her greed, untrustworthy and not having respect for other people's marriage, because, frauding a married man is definitely going to have effect in that man's marriage, separate amicably with her, then, in your next relationship, be careful and be more focused, like Bellong said, there are so many simple ways you can text an indeed Godly girl and she wont know she is being tested.
May God help you.

P. S.......please and please, let that girl go, she'll definitely meet her type.
It is well.

Please where did the OP say they were cohabiting? Could be the lady went visiting.

Op, come and clear this up.

bellong: @Op,
PS: Thought you believed she was godly but you allowed her to cohabit with you. For her to agree in cohabiting with you is enough proof that she is only religious and not godly. If you want a godly union, cohabitation is a wrong foundation to build it. I am sorry if I misinterpreted that part you said you have sent her packing out of your house.

You've made some great comments and they are well noted but read what i wrote again,sending her out of my apartment when she came to beg doesnt mean sending her packing. Not sure i mention ever cohabiting there. thank you

wwwlord:


You've made some great comments and they are well noted but read what i wrote again,sending her out of my apartment when she came to beg doesnt mean sending her packing. Not sure i mention ever cohabiting there. thank you

I thought as much. . .

wwwlord:


You've made some great comments and they are well noted but read what i wrote again,sending her out of my apartment when she came to beg doesnt mean sending her packing. Not sure i mention ever cohabiting there. thank you

Thanks for clarifying.
You may disregard my point above on cohabitation then.

All these church fellowship girls should pls stop embarrasing Jesus Christ..

This is the reason why I despise new generational fa. gots on suit, tie & pimped hair...

They'll never tell these ash.awo choristers & fellowship girls the truth..
..But messages of grace to cheat, sin & speak in tongues with heads uncovered..

Wow. 24 Year old trying to collect 170k for her convocation from a married man abroad....mehnnn that girl na sharp runz girl ooo. Sooner or later, she will milk more than 170k from you when she starts with you. She will place u like a trophy on a shelf to show off and brag to her so called friends! A big Golden fish at last! Move on with ur life ooo!

OP is finding it difficult to let go because he has invested so much, mostly financially in the relationship .

If you let her go now, the money you invested initially you will forget and move forward.
If you stay with her, possibly marry her, I can 100% assure you no matter how much you earn, you will never move above a particular line. She will bring problem to you, sleep with highest bidder even when you give her almost all your earning. The more you give, the more her taste increases. The more she gets into one problem or another.

I had friends like your girl, they never change. Although they are very nice and lovely. Homely too ...but you can't remove that "wanting more" attitude from them.

If you are sure you can go on with it, then all the best!

@OP
You want make i hook you up?

Greedy people don't change. It's in their DNA

Ask yourself this question, "would she date not alone stay with me if i didn't shower her with material things"

@vivanc, abeg where you take get your 92% from

jay bee: @OP
You want make i hook you up?

Greedy people don't change. It's in their DNA

Ask yourself this question, "would she date not alone stay with me if i didn't shower her with material things"

How are we sure you won't get the worst person for him.
The one that will behave like a kitten but she's real warrior .

Chillisauce:

How are we sure you won't get the worst person for him.
The one that will behave like a kitten but she's real warrior .

Easy pisse, his criteria aren't necessarily out of this world.

Homely
Church girl
Not too young nor too old
Working

Surely if i enter house of praise or christ embassy i would come out with enough numbers.

There are still so many girls waiting on the lord na so why must the dude allow himself enter one chance abi wetin dem dey call am

Chillisauce:

How are we sure you won't get the worst person for him.
The one that will behave like a kitten but she's real warrior .

So ...because a man once had an accident means he won't travel again?

jay bee:
Easy pisse, his criteria aren't necessarily out of this world.

Homely
Church girl
Not too young nor too old
Working

Surely if i enter house of praise or christ embassy i would come out with enough numbers.

There are still so many girls waiting on the lord na so why must the dude allow himself enter one chance abi wetin dem dey call am

Yes the bolded means one chance ...

wwwlord:


I met this pretty girl in June 2013, she is 24 just left school. I showed her I wasn't a player as soon as we met through my actions. We call and communicate well. She was a fellowship leader while she was in school so this gave me some confidence but she has some questionable friends and that often scares me as to her real identity.

One day we were at my place and we were going through her Facebook together, I saw that one of the popular guys from my hometown is her friend. This guy should be like 45, married and quite rich. His family is based in Canada. I asked my girl there and then if they ever dated but she said no and bad mouthed the guy in front of me, told me the guy wanted to date 3 of her friends at the same time and they were using him to catch fun, eating his money. She said the guy invited her and her best friend to his house once and gave them 100k as parting gift. That they never saw him more than once. That he also promised to sponsor her convocation party when the time comes.

A month later I was curious and checked her FB account since she gave me the password. I saw a message she sent to this guy asking after his welfare that she couldn't reach him via bbm or calls. The message started with "Hi honey" and that got me worried. I asked her if she ever tried contacting this guy since we last spoke about him and she denied this for like 4 days. I just wanted to build my confidence in her by hearing the truth from her but she kept lying i was dissapointed. During this time she accused me of making things up that i was free to break up if I wanted to. After 4 days of the brickbat i told her I saw the fb message she sent and she started begging that she was too scared to tell me the truth. She told me she has decided to change her phone number and get serious with me but i didn't see any need for that. She changed the line anyway and i forgave her. I started spending because i didn't want her to look outside. Got her i phone 5 and other things she needed just to show I have forgiven her. I had gotten more details about this guy and memorized his phone number.

In summary, 2 days to her convocation, my girl secretly sent a message to this married guy trying to confirm if they would see or not before she leave for school. She had deleted the guy's name from her phone but i know the number and a lot of information were intact in her phone memory. I confronted her again and she has been begging, that she just wanted to collect the 170k the guy promised her and disappear. She has been crying ever since that she was just being greedy and trying to play smart with the guy. Her friends and families have called me to apologize but i am really heartbroken. I don't know if i can fully trust her again. I had already concluded this girl was a potential but all this seems too difficult for me to swallow. I sent her out of my apartment last week and warned her to stay off.

Pay attention to the bolded. If you really Love yourself.
Make no mistake about it, if you don't cut your losses now, you will live to regret ever getting entangled with this girl.
Her family (not to mention her friends) is fully aware of her RUNz and you are simply a customer willing to enrich them.

Dear OP,

I am happy you did not enter one chance!

Please desist from her like a plague and stop using your money to buy love! Even if you spent N10m, a girl that will not stay will not.

You say you are inexperienced? I m not really better in that area but I have watched enough films to know some guys use the 'I am S, working at Y place' etc. Except you are been interviewed for a job, it is not really of importance where you work or your position esp to your prospective girl.

If you can help it, please avoid unemployed ladies not that all working ladies are saints.

Goodluck with your search.


You guys should go to when is the right time to ask my boyfriend for rent money' thread to see what's up

Acidosis:

So ...because a man once had an accident means he won't travel again?

No let him travel himself, instead of sending someone.

jay bee:
Easy pisse, his criteria aren't necessarily out of this world.

Homely
Church girl
Not too young nor too old
Working

Surely if i enter house of praise or christ embassy i would come out with enough numbers.

There are still so many girls waiting on the lord na so why must the dude allow himself enter one chance abi wetin dem dey call am

He has to learn himself. Nothing comes easy. Did he say he wants someone working? Nothing wrong with student. He just want someone for him. And him alone

wwwlord:

@Efemena..thanks for your words. My female couzin feels I should give her the last chance because I don't know if the next girl won't do worse because she seems homely. She has been calling her and explaining her case.

Guy, flee now and cut your losses. You female cousins won't be there when you keep awake at night or lose concentration in the office because you are wondering where you woman is at.
Good girls abound there, and also learn to have a tick skin it seems you are easily swayed by emotions. I have been there, believe me.

chaircover: @poster, i wont lie to you and say that breakups are easy cos they are not and it takes a lot of will power to be able to do so. It also takes you out of your comfort zone and that is why many many people stay with people that they know deep down in them that they are not the right person.

You say to yourself " the devil you know", and "how do you know that the next one out there will be any better" but that is a lie from the pits of hell.

You are one of the lucky ones! you have at least 10 people here saying the same thing. You also have the blessing of being shown the future up front. What if you had married this kind of girl and God forbid you run into financial difficulty in the future.

There are some things that you cant compromise on, and trust and integrity is one of them.

The 45 year old man was chasing her friends because the man knew that they were all available to sleep with that is why he approached them in the first instance. He knew that they were gold diggers and he knew that his money would speak and their backs will be on his bed in no time.

Even If the man misjudged her character was chasing her, who made her Robin hood to try and punish him. Is she not a fellowship sister as you said? Her aim should have been to bring him to Christ, not to further make the problem worse.

I repeat what does a 24 year old need N170K for? . . and why are you buying her Iphone 5's in 2 months of meeting her? You are just making a rod for your own back when you embark on things like this. I advise you to put your money away and to let your other attributes come to the surface. Let a woman want you for you and not for what you can spend on her.

If she wants an expensive phone, then she should go and work for it or buy a cheaper phone that she can afford. This is one reason why so many women are stuck in abusive marriages because they were only focusing on the wallet rather than the character of the man.

Many of you turn round and call Nigerian girls gold diggers but many of you are enablers and are part of the problem.

Thanks,she said the guy promised 170k for her convocation but that she never slept with him. But after all this episodes i asked her if none of her friends slept with the man,he wont have the gut to come after her?. You need to see all the qualities the girl display around me,calm,respectful etc. Same person who attends Shiloh every year and claimed one of her prayer points at last year Shiloh is a good husband,in my mind i initially thought this girl knows what she wants but i never threw away caution completely and i thank God its all unraveling now.

vivianc:

Honestly, no one is perfect. What she does is what 92% of ladies, especially in Nigeria do, even tho there is no justification whatsoever for that, but that's the hard truth. So there is every possibility that the next girl you meet might have being through this phase.

She should have stopped when a very serious guy got into her life, but she didn't. The "no one is perfect" cliche is not applicable to her, the truth of the matter is she is not ready for a committed relationship.

One more thing, most times you have to look beyond the sparkling of a jewelry to realise its fake.

When you said 92% of Nigerian girls have done or are doing this what is the hope for single guys,its disturbing.

wwwlord:


Thanks,she said the guy promised 170k for her convocation but that she never slept with him.

Guy, that place no get meter and you have just been sold one of the oldest lies in a book.
Think am naw? How will a married man give 3 girls 100k each and not do the do?
Abi na him sister ni?

bukatyne: Dear OP,

I am happy you did not enter one chance!

Please desist from her like a plague and stop using your money to buy love! Even if you spent N10m, a girl that will not stay will not.

You say you are inexperienced? I m not really better in that area but I have watched enough films to know some guys use the 'I am S, working at Y place' etc. Except you are been interviewed for a job, it is not really of importance where you work or your position esp to your prospective girl.
If you can help it, please avoid unemployed ladies not that all working ladies are saints. Goodluck with your search.You guys should go to when is the right time to ask my boyfriend for rent money' thread to see what's up

When i say i am inexperienced,yes i am saying i dont know how runs girls operate but that doesnt mean i have never dated before. thanks

wwwlord:


You need to see all the qualities the girl display around me,calm,respectful etc. Same person who attends Shiloh every year and claimed one of her prayer points at last year Shiloh is a good husband,in my mind i initially thought this girl knows what she wants but i never threw away caution completely and i thank God its all unraveling now.

Bros if you continue looking at these things, you will end up with an Asssshhhhh in a Born Against Clothing.

wwwlord:
I sent her out of my apartment last week and warned her to stay off.

Sorry to digress but I'd like to know what exactly you meant by this? In your original post, you used the phrase sent her packing and what you have here is really no different.

I think what transpired between you both went beyond her merely visiting you. It's beginning to sound more like she was living with you - though it's up to you to concede to that fact or not - but either way, it sort of explains the attachment you have to her and why you seem unwilling to let go.

I hope you know that if you've been sleeping with her like man and wife, then she does have certain 'rights' to your purse and you my brother, have no leg to stand on, much less wave the flag of morality in our faces.

Acidosis: All these church fellowship girls should pls stop embarrasing Jesus Christ..

This is the reason why I despise new generational fa. gots on suit, tie & pimped hair...

They'll never tell these ash.awo choristers & fellowship girls the truth..
..But messages of grace to cheat, sin & speak in tongues with heads uncovered..

The God Hates Sin and not the Sinner type.
I have seen them all.

Efemena_xy:

Sorry to digress but I'd like to know what exactly you meant by this? In your original post, you used the phrase sent her packing and what you have here is really no different.

I think what transpired between you both went beyond her merely visiting you. It's beginning to sound more like she was living with you - though it's up to you to concede to that fact or not - but either way, it sort of explains the attachment you have to her and why you seem unwilling to let go.

I hope you know that if you've been sleeping with her like man and wife, then she does have certain 'rights' to your purse and you my brother, have no leg to stand on, much less wave the flag of morality in our faces.

Well i have clarified what i meant in earlier posts, there was an outburst of anger which led to me practically walking her out and threatening her to stay away, she already had a good rapport with my cousin who lives with me and she pops in from time to time.you can replace that word with any phrase that suits you but i just hate it when people act like they know more than the accussed. And i never waved any flag of morality in front of you, thinking over a decision already made and trying to sample peoples opinion doesnt have nothing to do with morality. I Never preached sainthood to you.Thanks

jay bee: @OP
You want make i hook you up?

Greedy people don't change. It's in their DNA

Ask yourself this question, "would she date not alone stay with me if i didn't shower her with material things"

hook me up instead....

wwwlord:


When you said 92% of Nigerian girls have done or are doing this what is the hope for single guys,its disturbing.

Yes it is, unfortunately every thing in life right now is so disturbing, for both guys and babes.

If you hadn't caught your gf, would you have believed she does that?

coogar:

hook me up instead....

Ileoba is available for u!
Come on, wetin u dey find again?