^^^^^
He didn't feel uncomfortable being treated differently with the plate ish?

chaircover:

YPP, yes its good to keep your figure, especially if your hubby likes lepa girls and he married you as a lepa.

Some men also like voluptuous ladies

Lets not just look at physical appearance but also what is up there in the brain also. The man goes to work and interact with professional and intelligent women everyday. He lunches with them everyday, he comes back home but all some women can talk about is airhead topics such as the colour of kim kardashians lipstick

You dont have to be educated to be intelligent. Your husband is climbing up the career ladder but if you are still at home watching jerry springer all day and he is ashamed to take you to the office Christmas Party, then something is wrong and you need to step up your game.

Even as a stay-at-home mum you can increase your knowledge and make good use of that time to better yourself. Pick a cookery program and follow it and cook a different meal it for your husband . . .keep on surprising him. It doesn't have to be nollywood & africa magic all the time . .there are quizzes, documentaries and all sorts you can watch on tv or youtube to increase your knowledge.

The question one has to ask is can I make a very good first lady if my husband became president today?

God bless you for this.I learnt it from my aunt.I guess hat is what is happening to Nigeria's first family.


Goodluck Jonathan was a lecturer in the University while Patience owned a restaurant in the school .From being a customer,Jonathan became her husband.

Now he is no longer a lecturer but the President of a great nation.Patience is finding it hard to step up.Her poise,carriage,e.t.c is so not it.God help her sha.


When your husband steps up,step up too.
A family member of mine,her husband is in a very high position in this country.She had to up her game and got a Phd.

That title:Dr(Mrs) earns syou respect and makes you appear polished.

Steping up your game includes your dressing,your culinary skills(go to a cooking school and learn).Due to meetings and conferences,your husband will now be used to gravy and chili sauce instead of the native stew you people used to eat

Due to frequent travels,he has slept in so many hotel both within and outside the country.Change your room to look as neat as those rooms in Transcorp hilton and intercontinental hotel(they are big hotels so I guess they should be wow)

That way he won't feel as if he is missing anything.he won't feel moody when he comes home.

yellowpawpaw: Good answer baby mama.
Thanks a lot.

Let's look at this cheating thing from a different perspective.
Now as a woman whose husband suddenly started cheating, where did u go wrong, most guys always lament their wives pushed them into it.
Nagging and domineering wife can make a man find solace in another woman's hand.
Another cause for cheating is letting go of ur once fine body and looking and dressing like iya ibeji that lives across the street. Giving birth is never an excuse to let go.
Look at our girls and young mothers. I, a woman feel disgusted seeing them like that, how about d spouse? A man will first look b4 he eats irrespective of who u r. U can't make ur bobbys to stand straight again but it pays to still use good supportive bra and support it not dangling it like one old mama in d village. That is an eye sore.
That u gave birth to 4 is not an excuse to hv tyres all over ur body, and ur stomach looks like a pregnant woman's own.
Common ladies, tighten up and always look smart.
Exercise and eat well.
Look and dress well. Who said u can't wear that bum short again?
All those sex*y lingeries e no more, now they r replaced with wrappers and over sized t-shirts and whatever.
(That reminds me, baby mama, I saw one picture of urs u posted one day and later deleted. Looking at that picture, who would hv tot u hv even giving birth)

If u r not guilty of all these and he still decides to floricate, he is an a*sshole and he should fu*ck off. Life continues w'out him. Still,
I can stay with him and be miserable. Its an individual choice.

.


YPP,

There is no excuse for a man to cheat else wife can cheat when hubby loses his six packs or becomes bald.

If the man is not content with the way wifey dresses or looks, what does he have a mouth for? Also remember we have different bodies and some people can never be slim/trim no matter what they do and some can never be fat. What stops the hubby from buying what he wants to see on his wife? I know some wives might not wear but that is another thing altogether.

If every woman has her way, she would be trim after childbirth though I see extreme cases. Everyone I know had CS end to have protuding tummies.

Remember that too much work and poverty also contributes. A woman who hawks her wares 10km under the hot sun daily might not make her looks her priority same as a woman who fetches water and next jumps into the kitchen to pound yam while thinking of how to do the laundry.

chaircover: LOL typical church banter started . . .they call him HRH anyway so everyone just laughed it off

HRH's dont eat with paper plates and stand in food queues

Lobatan

Whoop whoopp, HRH in da house you had better bow down and respect royalty

carmelion:


God bless you for this.I learnt it from my aunt.That is what is happening to Nigeria first family.


Goodluck Jonathan was a lecturer in the University while Patience owns a restaurant.From being a customer,Jonathan became her husband.

Now he is no longer a lecturer but the President of a great nation.Patience is finding it hard to step up.Her poise,carriage,mannerism is so not it.God help her sha.


When your husband steps up,step up too.
A family member of mine,her husband is in a very high position in this country.She had to up her game and got a Phd.

That title:Dr(Mrs) earns syou respct and makes you appear polish.

Steping up your game includes your dressing,your culinary skills(go to a cooking school and learn).Due to meetings and conferences,your husband will now be used to gravy and chili sauce instead of the native stew you people used to eat.

Change your room to look as neat as those rooms in Transcorp hilton and intercontinental hotel(they are big hotels so I guess they should be wow)

That way he won't feel as if he is missing anything.

Thank you very much! I always joked back then that you know a married woman from a single woman. The married woman looking shabby(please forgive me for using such word) and the single babes looking good and attractive. I believe it's that mindset that i'm hooked and i'm not looking for husband again of some women that causes it. In summary, Women should look their best at all times.

chaircover: LOL typical church banter started . . .they call him HRH anyway so everyone just laughed it off

HRH's dont eat with paper plates and stand in food queues

I think everyshould have been served equally and royal treatment at home.

That is exactly what made our cuntry what it is

Hei, hei, hei.
Pls make una wait a minute.
We r trying to be real here.

CC, I mean one should try and maintain that figure her man met her with. Lepa or biggie biggie. Some biggies have very nice shape, maintaining it is the koko.
There r many things that r basically a turn off for men.
Third leg didn't go to school. A lot of men r what we call abali agba aka( no night w'out a woman)type of guys.

U marry such, u gat to keep it up or anything can happen. That is the way they r wired. And a lot more.
We can't pretend all these don't happen and wish them away. We gat to face them by telling ourselves the truth, do our part dilligently and if that man still want to be like a he-goat, then d door is wide open.

bukatyne: .


YPP,

There is no excuse for a man to cheat else wife can cheat when hubby loses his six packs or becomes bald.

If the man is not content with the way wifey dresses or looks, what does he have a mouth for? Also remember we have different bodies and some people can never be slim/trim no matter what they do and some can never be fat. What stops the hubby from buying what he wants to see on his wife? I know some wives might not wear but that is another thing altogether.

If every woman has her way, she would be trim after childbirth though I see extreme cases. Everyone I know had CS end to have protuding tummies.

Remember that too much work and poverty also contributes. A woman who hawks her wares 10km under the hot sun daily might not make her looks her priority same as a woman who fetches water and next jumps into the kitchen to pound yam while thinking of how to do the laundry.

Buky, a man has no excuse to cheat and I personally hate it but they do, or don't they?
The one million question now is what was my contribution in pushing him to the arms of another woman. We talk of an ideal marriage but we hv to face the reality on ground.
A woman who suddenly started cheating must hv been having a bedroom related problem with her hubby. So also a man.
Man's own is rather very serious cos they r easily attracted by what they c.

Yep CC said something about a lady having it up there and I agree with her.

The truth still remains that most women drive their hubby to another woman-s arms without knowing it.
Let's start by advicing and admonishing ourselves first.

That thing u said about cs is not quite true. I did cs and worked on my body.
Monitored what enters my mouth and got back to shape.
Have u seen most women eating and drinking soft drinks like water?
Haba!
Most of us r a huge turn off. How many of us can brisk walk for like 30 minutes in d neborhood?
The list is endless.
We r very lazy.
Work on ur womanliness after giving birth, another core reason for cheating.
A lot of them.

yellowpawpaw: Good answer baby mama.
Thanks a lot.

Let's look at this cheating thing from a different perspective.
Now as a woman whose husband suddenly started cheating, where did u go wrong, most guys always lament their wives pushed them into it.
Nagging and domineering wife can make a man find solace in another woman's hand.
Another cause for cheating is letting go of ur once fine body and looking and dressing like iya ibeji that lives across the street. Giving birth is never an excuse to let go.
Look at our girls and young mothers. I, a woman feel disgusted seeing them like that, how about d spouse? A man will first look b4 he eats irrespective of who u r. U can't make ur bobbys to stand straight again but it pays to still use good supportive bra and support it not dangling it like one old mama in d village. That is an eye sore.
That u gave birth to 4 is not an excuse to hv tyres all over ur body, and ur stomach looks like a pregnant woman's own.
Common ladies, tighten up and always look smart.
Exercise and eat well.
Look and dress well. Who said u can't wear that bum short again?
All those sex*y lingeries e no more, now they r replaced with wrappers and over sized t-shirts and whatever.
(That reminds me, baby mama, I saw one picture of urs u posted one day and later deleted. Looking at that picture, who would hv tot u hv even giving birth)

If u r not guilty of all these and he still decides to floricate, he is an a*sshole and he should fu*ck off. Life continues w'out him. Still,
I can stay with him and be miserable. Its an individual choice.

Bless you, ma'am.

And guys should stop thinking beer bellies are sexy and flabby arms and everything look great. Smh

yellowpawpaw:
Buky, a man has no excuse to cheat and I personally hate it but they do, or don't they?
The one million question now is what was my contribution in pushing him to the arms of another woman. We talk of an ideal marriage but we hv to face the reality on ground.
A woman who suddenly started cheating must hv been having a bedroom related problem with her hubby. So also a man.
Man's own is rather very serious cos they r easily attracted by what they c.

Yep CC said something about a lady having it up there and I agree with her.

The truth still remains that most women drive their hubby to another woman-s arms without knowing it.
Let's start by advicing and admonishing ourselves first.

That thing u said about cs is not quite true. I did cs and worked on my body.
Monitored what enters my mouth and got back to shape.
Have u seen most women eating and drinking soft drinks like water?
Haba!
Most of us r a huge turn off. How many of us can brisk walk for like 30 minutes in d neborhood?
The list is endless.
We r very lazy.
Work on ur womanliness after giving birth, another core reason for cheating.
A lot of them.

The CS stuff is based on what I see around.

I would agree that some women are turn offs the way they eat et al but it is the duty of the hubby to bring her back in line/shape.

I still say again that there is excuse for cheating. If the husband has complained to the wife without change, he can do something dramatic to show the woman he's serious.

A lot of women are lazy with their apperance; a lot of men are lazy in making it work. Most Nigerian couples are lazy anyways that's why they want to do it as their ancestors did it without rreinventing the wheel.

As for dressing, it seems it is a psycological thing. Married women are expected to behave and conduct themselves in a certain way. It is now that churches have started hammering on th dressing and looking part.

You're right @Yellowpawpaw. You see, when a woman (and men too) develop a culture of exercising eating right and keeping fit, chances of losing shape is reduced to a minimum... While at Carson, whenever i wake up and look out the window, you see couples jogging vigorously and enjoying it, my host's wife never misses her 50 sit ups per day (a mother of two children) when i also went to the gym, i saw a lot of women, some who just had a child 15 months ago, some even use bar bells. But when i returned, i tried looking out for such, but only a neglible percentage of women do it here which is quite disappointing. Some don't do anything(sedentary life) and they eat junk like lions. The point here is that women and men too should try to build a routine exercise culture when young and it will go a long way.

chaircover: The truth is that the "better" the husband, the more the temptation. Women love good things and Its funny how after a man has been "cooked", he suddenly becomes very attractive to other women. I recently heard that some sisters were discussing my husband in church and were saying that they wished they were married to him. I said to myself "in your dreams" . . . .. Now if you see the way I sit beside him gba gba gba in church . . .

I dont advise that Wives should snoop or check up or do FBI on their spouses. Its when he knows that you snoop that he will start being more secretive and more clever at hiding things so you dont realy gain anything.

I have full access to my husbands phones and have all his passwords . . .however I am aware that he is "husband type material" to some, so I dont bury my head in the sand and say they wont chase him and one actually did if not for the grace of God and his resolve he was able to get her off him; when the "agony uncle" became the "agony chased" I still tease him about it.

At the same time, I try to make sure that I am not just any wife, but a wife who is an asset in every area.

It works both ways. He has to do his bit which is to keep his vows and I have to do my bit which is to keep him interested.

BAM!!!!

ferhyntorlah:

Thank you oh. Some Nigerian men and women are just too frigid in bedmatics.

A question to the men: are you comfortable with your wife initiating sex?

YES, MA'AM!

chaircover:

YPP, yes its good to keep your figure, especially if your hubby likes lepa girls and he married you as a lepa.

Some men also like voluptuous ladies

Lets not just look at physical appearance but also what is up there in the brain also. The man goes to work and interact with professional and intelligent women everyday. He lunches with them everyday, he comes back home but all some women can talk about is airhead topics such as the colour of kim kardashians lipstick

You dont have to be educated to be intelligent. Your husband is climbing up the career ladder but if you are still at home watching jerry springer all day and he is ashamed to take you to the office Christmas Party, then something is wrong and you need to step up your game.

Even as a stay-at-home mum you can increase your knowledge and make good use of that time to better yourself. Pick a cookery program and follow it and cook a different meal it for your husband . . .keep on surprising him. It doesn't have to be nollywood & africa magic all the time . .there are quizzes, documentaries and all sorts you can watch on tv or youtube to increase your knowledge.

The question one has to ask is can I make a very good first lady if my husband became president today?

BAM!!!

Lepaciously voluptious is my thing. Not flabby. As long as it's all firm and disciplined, I'm one happy camper.

And I never know what to do with airheads.

chaircover: LOL typical church banter started . . .they call him HRH anyway so everyone just laughed it off

HRH's dont eat with paper plates and stand in food queues

CORREEEEEEEEEEEECT!!!!

yellowpawpaw:
Buky, a man has no excuse to cheat and I personally hate it but they do, or don't they?
The one million question now is what was my contribution in pushing him to the arms of another woman. We talk of an ideal marriage but we hv to face the reality on ground.
A woman who suddenly started cheating must hv been having a bedroom related problem with her hubby. So also a man.
Man's own is rather very serious cos they r easily attracted by what they c.

Yep CC said something about a lady having it up there and I agree with her.

The truth still remains that most women drive their hubby to another woman-s arms without knowing it.
Let's start by advicing and admonishing ourselves first.

That thing u said about cs is not quite true. I did cs and worked on my body.
Monitored what enters my mouth and got back to shape.
Have u seen most women eating and drinking soft drinks like water?
Haba!
Most of us r a huge turn off. How many of us can brisk walk for like 30 minutes in d neborhood?
The list is endless.
We r very lazy.
Work on ur womanliness after giving birth, another core reason for cheating.
A lot of them.

So on point. No excuse to cheat, ok. But there's no doubt that the bedroom can turn frosty when couples start getting lazy about their physical attractiveness.

About the lepa and orobo thing, nobody is asking anybody else to change their body type, just to be diligent in disciplining it. I have seen lepas that have almost zero sex appeal and orobos that drive you wild with lust. It's all a question of self-appreciation. My standard is a woman who loves her body and looks after it.

Ihedinobi:
BAM!!!

Lepaciously voluptious is my thing. Not flabby. As long as it's all firm and disciplined, I'm one happy camper.

And I never know what to do with airheads.

are we twins? Why we come like the same thing na?

PocketEconomist: are we twins? Why we come like the same thing na?

As long as the right places are soft and all that....

chaircover:

Isn’t that taking it a bit too far about the country bit?

Everyone had a choice and I chose to serve my husband myself and on a china plate what is wrong with that? If someone had done same would I have refused to serve them?

This is not the first time I’ve said it. If I am there, my husband does not queue for food at parties. He can stand in a queue, but I won’t let him.

Also why should people have 2 different attitudes? One at home and one outside?

Jaybee ur not serious. . . . .

I fully agree. It's not a question of favoritism. This is simply a given wife's custom with her husband. It's understandable.

In my culture, it is assumed that at a function or anything that involves feasting with other people, the wife goes to get her husband's food. She decides what he is served and how it is served.

Yaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy!!!! CC the CC
Nobody can spoil ministry for you jor
Lol @ sitting down beside him bam bam
Me likey ur style jare

chaircover:

Isn’t that taking it a bit too far about the country bit?

Everyone had a choice and I chose to serve my husband myself and on a china plate what is wrong with that? If someone had done same would I have refused to serve them?

This is not the first time I’ve said it. If I am there, my husband does not queue for food at parties. He can stand in a queue, but I won’t let him.

Also why should people have 2 different attitudes? One at home and one outside?

Jaybee ur not serious. . . . .

This is not a function of two different attitudes

A function is organized in Church and you are privileged to serve either by virtue of position or trust and you serve your hubby differently with what I believe to be made with public funds or contribution. Jonathan is elected as president and he puts all his family members in position of power

The party analogy is different; afteral if 10 people go as a group to a party, one or two people eap those closet to the host will coordinate food.

I bet you that not everyone would have been happy with the treatment but they will smile. Don't be surprised you hear side talks in passing.

Anyways, you can't try that in some churches. Your posittion as a Deacon is different from wife and should be different. I hope the serving is rotated so that not only your hubby gets to eat with china ware.

It is well

chaircover:

Guys are funny

When I go on a diet, I loose weight from the wrong place first . . .come and see complaints galore

Nnaa, if dat one happen, na force-feeding tinz o

Ihedinobi:
I fully agree. It's not a question of favoritism. This is simply a given wife's custom with her husband. It's understandable.

In my culture, it is assumed that at a function or anything that involves feasting with other people, the wife goes to get her husband's food. She decidies what he is served and how it is served.

Your cultural customs does not apply in a public gathering else Jonathan's customs might be to eat N1m food daily with our money

bukatyne:

This is not a function of two different attitudes

A function is organized in Church and you are privileged to serve either by virtue of position or trust and you serve your hubby differently with what I believe to be made with public funds or contribution. Jonathan is elected as president and he puts all his family members in position of power

The party analogy is different; afteral if 10 people go as a group to a party, one or two people eap those closet to the host will coordinate food.

I bet you that not everyone would have been happy with the treatment but they will smile. Don't be surprised you hear side talks in passing.

Anyways, you can't try that in some churches. Your posittion as a Deacon is different from wife and should be different. I hope the serving is rotated so that not only your hubby gets to eat with china ware.

It is well

I'm an advocate of treating everybody equally but really On top food, somebody wld be making side remarks in church They're on their own!

And yes, my hubby does not get to queue, either i'm the one serving or not, it's my duty to arrange for his food!

Other wives can do same, if dey so please!

Ihedinobi:


As long as the right places are soft and all that....

yes o my brother. A good idea is to build an workout routine with your wife. That would help. Also, eating the right stuff, limit junk, and you would be fine.

chaircover:


The question one has to ask is can I make a very good first lady if my husband became president today?

Beautiful question. The same can be posited about the men: will this man present himself well in public gatherings/functions?

chaircover:

Guys are funny

When I go on a diet, I loose weight from the wrong place first . . .come and see complaints galore

Madam, na so jare. All must workout, abi you like man with pot belly?