Pls what should i do? Pls moderator front page. It happened that one day i was checking my daddy's phone without his concet, so in the message inbox i saw some messages from another woman which discused about another children's life and they are my father's children [3] in number and these children are not kids 'cos one of them is awaiting result i.e to furthermore, so i called on my daddy's attention and he explained everything to me and even took me to where they are and beg me not to inform my mummy, but since i had known he used to tell me how things are going. Pls my pple am at the middle of the river so pls advice me.

Well, you've got to bear with him like a man till the time is right enough for others to know about it.

I think you should keep it a secret as much as possible since he has confided in you. But advice him to break it to your mum and other siblings himself. He should tell them so that the guilt he is having will be totally reduced. It will be rocky for sure, but what has happened has happened.

Dear God,
Please, let me not have an husband like the OP's father.
Amen.

joromi: Dear God,
Please, let me not have an husband like the OP's father.
Amen.

joromi: Dear God,
Please, let me not have an husband like the OP's father.
Amen.

That's why you should not read another person's texts. Now you saw what you cannot handle. If I had advised you that day not to read your father's text, you'd have said I should mind my business.

Please do not read ur wife's, husbands, girlfriend's, boyfriend's, father's, mother's, sister's, brother's, coworker's, best friend's etc texts, except you're working very hard to be unhappy. Spend ur time looking for what will keep u happy. "yanga dey sleep, trouble go wake am"

*grabs chair*

@op, what i think you can do is to persuade your dad to disclose the secret to your mum, what has been done can not be undone again, let him disclose to her, and be there to comfort and appeal to your mum to take it easy. I think this shouldn't be difficult for both of you, since you're now confidants of each other. But until your dad accept/adhere to the appeal, never let the secret comes out from your mouth.

joromi: Dear God,
Please, let me not have an husband like the OP's father.
Amen.

A VERY BIG AMEN.

Woged2005: That's why you should not read another person's texts. Now you saw what you cannot handle. If I had advised you that day not to read your father's text, you'd have said I should mind my business.

Please do not read ur wife's, husbands, girlfriend's, boyfriend's, father's, mother's, sister's, brother's, coworker's, best friend's etc texts, except you're working very hard to be unhappy. Spend ur time looking for what will keep u happy. "yanga dey sleep, trouble go wake am"

you're very right, many people don't know that this is one of the secrets of being continously happy.

"bi eti ko gbo yinkin, inu o ni baje"

Woged2005: That's why you should not read another person's texts. Now you saw what you cannot handle. If I had advised you that day not to read your father's text, you'd have said I should mind my business.

Please do not read ur wife's, husbands, girlfriend's, boyfriend's, father's, mother's, sister's, brother's, coworker's, best friend's etc texts, except you're working very hard to be unhappy. Spend ur time looking for what will keep u happy. "yanga dey sleep, trouble go wake am"

Its a good advice but do u no that not reading and feigning ignorance has broken a lot of homes to. There are Many bad situations that could havebeen savaged if Immediate attention was given to it. That trouble u keep running from will meet u in future.

I could not keep such a secret!
Even the POPE must hear it o!
I will just advise his itchy blokos to FESS-UP HIMSELF or else!

Woged2005: That's why you should not read another person's texts. Now you saw what you cannot handle. If I had advised you that day not to read your father's text, you'd have said I should mind my business.

Please do not read ur wife's, husbands, girlfriend's, boyfriend's, father's, mother's, sister's, brother's, coworker's, best friend's etc texts, except you're working very hard to be unhappy. Spend ur time looking for what will keep u happy. "yanga dey sleep, trouble go wake am"

Thanks bros

eyenCalabar: Well, you've got to bear with him like a man till the time is right enough for others to know about it.

Okay no problem

joromi: Dear God,
Please, let me not have an husband like the OP's father.
Amen.

U no serious

greatgod2012: @op, what i think you can do is to persuade your dad to disclose the secret to your mum, what has been done can not be undone again, let him disclose to her, and be there to comfort and appeal to your mum to take it easy. I think this shouldn't be difficult for both of you, since you're now confidants of each other. But until your dad accept/adhere to the appeal, never let the secret comes out from your mouth.

Alright thanks

sandijey:

Its a good advice but do u no that not reading and feigning ignorance has broken a lot of homes to. There are Many bad situations that could havebeen savaged if Immediate attention was given to it. That trouble u keep running from will meet u in future.

I quite don't agree. Some "future" problems solve itself or disappear before you get to that "future" , others, you acquire enough wisdom as to how to deal with it.

Now that pokenosing has led the OP into the problem of 2020, he has 6 years to deal with the headache and stress and probably never get a solution. What can he or her mom do NOW even if he let's the mom know? He can only encourage the dad to 'fess up and while he waits for that,he deal with the burden of his sudden "knowledge" .

ifyalways:
I quite don't agree. Some "future" problems solve itself or disappear before you get to that "future" , others, you acquire enough wisdom as to how to deal with it.

Now that pokenosing has led the OP into the problem of 2020, he has 6 years to deal with the headache and stress and probably never get a solution. What can he or her mom do NOW even if he let's the mom know? He can only encourage the dad to 'fess up and while he waits for that,he deal with the burden of his sudden "knowledge" .

How many problems actually fizzle out? Why is it a problem in thefirst place? Is it not meant to be solved! Problems always rear its head whether now or later. The only part I agree wiv u is having wisdom to deal wiv it!
Is it not better she knows now, or is it when her father dies that one woman would come wiv kids and start claiming property. My close friend almostlost her marriage for feigning ignorance. By the time she knew wassup, her husband was about to abscond wiv her only son and another woman! What saved her? She Read her husbands message! Right on time. Am not saying u should become an fbi or monitoring spirit. But once in a while, ubetter be in the know! And pray for wisdom to solve it.

H

sandijey:

Its a good advice but do u no that not reading and feigning ignorance has broken a lot of homes to. There are Many bad situations that could havebeen savaged if Immediate attention was given to it. That trouble u keep running from will meet u in future.

God bless you Sandijey,ignorance can never yield a permanent bliss,there is nothing wrong in reading your spouse messages.i won't read my dad's though.

greatgod2012:


you're very right, many people don't know that this is one of the secrets of being continously happy.

"bi eti ko gbo yinkin, inu o ni baje"

If I don't read the message when Wil I know it's time to caash the check .

He has to tell your mum himself. The truth will come out one day

Chillisauce, you no well ,no be small cashing of check.

sandijey:

How many problems actually fizzle out? Why is it a problem in thefirst place? Is it not meant to be solved! Problems always rear its head whether now or later. The only part I agree wiv u is having wisdom to deal wiv it!
Is it not better she knows now, or is it when her father dies that one woman would come wiv kids and start claiming property. My close friend almostlost her marriage for feigning ignorance. By the time she knew wassup, her husband was about to abscond wiv her only son and another woman! What saved her? She Read her husbands message! Right on time. Am not saying u should become an fbi or monitoring spirit. But once in a while, ubetter be in the know! And pray for wisdom to solve it.

Hmmmn.
I've had problems that disappeared on their own in due time without me doing a thing.

Now that he knows,it won't stop the dad from willing everything he has to the other kids nor stop the dad from moving in with the other woman,if he so desires. The only semi advantage he's gained is -he knows,hence it won't be a shock anymore.

Btw,there's a huge difference btw feigning ignorant and being ignorant.
If OP didn't read the sms he'll be ignorant. He'll be feigning ignorant if he NOW wants to pretend or believe he didn't read it. Question is now that he's in the know- what can he do to HELP matters

On a lighter note, you are now the apple of your father's eyes. The best you can do for now is to use what you know to the overall advantage of the family.

I do not know your dad, if what I am writing here will be a disadvantage in the long run, please disregard the advice. The fact that your dad is keeping it a secret from your mum shows that despite his atrocities, he still has that little fear and respect for her. If I were in your shoes, this is what I will do if my dad cannot open up to my mum himself.

Will study the areas where he is not living up to his responsibilities and have a talk with him to amend them for the good of the home using the information for negotiation. He will have to start treating my mum with the respect and attention she deserves even if he is not ready to disclose his secret. He must also attend to the needs of the children at home, if he has not been doing it before now. In essence, the information will be used to the family's advantage.

Caveat: Only do what I mentioned above if your dad is a type of person you can negotiate with. Meanwhile, why not ask for an opportunity to meet your half-brothers....

You mum ll be heartbroken if she ever finds out that you knew and never told her.Let your popsy confess his secrets,that ll be better for every one.

@op, let's not go sentimental here.
D deed has been done
Now what to do;
ZIP UR MOUTH.

Then,
Stylishly make sure u know ur daddy's next of kin, whether he used ur mum and u guys, his will if u r smart enuf. Here u hv to stylishly involve ur mum. Is she aware of the content of his will? The next of kin stuff?
How is he running d family?
Is mummy doing something tangible?
R u guys still young or working?
Lots of things u need to find out and subtly harness things in ur favour and that of ur mum.
Don't ever open up.
Be smart.
Smart and wise pple win it all.
Be a very good son from now on.

All d best.

Bros, beg your dad to tell everyone the secret. Better it is spilled now than after he is dead. The worst thing that can happen to your mother and siblings is for your father to pass on and then they find out he had another family elsewhere. You mother may hate him more even in death and she would think their entire marriage was a lie.

Abeg tell your dad the implication of what he is doing. Tell him it is very dangerous and that if anything happens to him, the mess he will leave behind will be more than anyone can clean up. Issues about sharing property will come up, who knew about the other family etc?

Did he tell you his siblings know about the other family? How many of his own family members know. Abeg, let him realise it is better to settle the issue now and continue to pester him until he accepts. He must confess o, stuff like that does not follow one to the grave because it will create a big mess after the person is gone!

Nashville: Bros, beg your dad to tell everyone the secret. Better it is spilled now than after he is dead. The worst thing that can happen to your mother and siblings is for your father to pass on and then they find out he had another family elsewhere. You mother may hate him more even in death and she would think their entire marriage was a lie.

Abeg tell your dad the implication of what he is doing. Tell him it is very dangerous and that if anything happens to him, the mess he will leave behind will be more than anyone can clean up. Issues about sharing property will come up, who knew about the other family etc?

Did he tell you his siblings know about the other family? How many of his own family members know. Abeg, let him realise it is better to settle the issue now and continue to pester him until he accepts. He must confess o, stuff like that does not follow one to the grave because it will create a big mess after the person is gone!

Thanks Nashville