How do I get laid? It' s a question asked by
millions of guys , and not just virgins either .
Everyone wants to know how to get laid in
any and every possible scenario . Since we all
weren 't dealt the same hand , we' ve jotted
down 25 ways / tips to help you get laid.
Be as Attractive as Possible
They may not have known it at the time but
Nada Surf dished out the most sagacious
“ how to get laid” advice there is in their 1996
tour de force Popular: “ Being attractive is the
most important thing there is . If you wanna
catch the biggest fish in your pond , you have
to be as attractive as possible . ” Bleep YES !
That's the shit I 'm talking about . It 's not
necessary , however , to look like Brad Pitt
just to get laid. Sure , it helps to have a
chiseled jawline , soul - piercing eyes and a
buttox for the ages , but if you squeeze every
last drop of attractiveness out of yourself - -
no matter what level you’re at - - I guarantee
you 'll be six unimpressive inches deep inside
a queef box in no time at all. So long as
you . ..
Play in Your Own League
It would be disingenuous to say looks aren't
the biggest factor in getting laid. For anyone
that isn 't filthy rich, eighty percent of slangin ’
dick is all about your exterior ; it ’s a
superficial world and anyone willing to Bleep
you after knowing you for twenty - five
minutes could care less about all the great
stuff going on in the inside that ugly capsule
you call a body. That said , if the most
attractive version of you is a " 4 " on the scale
of good - lookingness then you need to focus
on chicks close to that or worse . Getting laid
is completely different than finding a
girlfriend . When you settle down , the last
thing you want to do is settle but if you ’re
only looking to squeeze out a few pulses on
a cold winter ’s night , you' re going to fail if
you consistently try to bang girl 's who don 't
have a lazy eye to match yours .
Don ’ t Be Cheap
Pay for the cab , buy her a drink . Also a good
way to discover your preferences . A girl who
offers to pay is likely less entitled / not a gold
digger , which will go a long way if you ever
decide to get serious . Decline her offer
because you are a man, and this is how the
world works .
Be Good at Something
In other words , be interesting. Cooking ,
soccer , guitar , collecting stamps,
ventriloquism , motorcycle maintenance ,
whatever . Don ’ t be a boring , mouth-
breathing equivalent of an oak tree .
Everyone is talented at something , so make
an impression with those talents . You can
do it without being a show- off , too .
Go Out With People That Fill in Your “ Gaps ”
Are you handsome as all shit but have
horrible anxiety breaking the ice or
approaching groups of girls ? Make sure one
of the guys in your group is fearless and
always willing to be “that guy. ” Even if he
isn ’t the best looking dude, the girls will see
he ’s rolling with you , Nature ’s Gift, and
immediately want to engage in conversation .
For his troubles , he ’ll get your table scraps .
That’s how teamwork works, you guys .
Post Up
At college , I once heard a possibly
apocryphal story about a guy who
developed something he called the “Four
Pillars ” to getting laid. Three of them were
ridiculous and shouldn ’t be discussed here .
One of the pillars , though , does work :
Posting up . Moving too much in a bar
makes you seem unsure of yourself . Actually
standing still , though , allows you to scope
out the situation and find the talented and
available girls at a bar or party. Two people
constantly moving in one space could
theoretically never find each other. If one
person stays still , though , that problem is
eliminated . That’s kind of like science .
Be a Little Bit of a Dick
The concept of “negging ” is too overplayed ,
and it makes us think of that awful “Mystery ”
guy . But this is an obvious fact : The nicer
you are, the less chance you ’ll have with a
girl . Similarly, if you ’re a complete asshole ,
you ’ll also have less chance with a girl . The
key is finding that happy medium where
you ’re challenging her a bit , but also not
straight- up insulting her.
Don ’ t Make it a Big Deal
Think of how many nights out that had the
sole goal of hooking up fell short of your
expectations. Unless you ’re Justin
Timberlake or a young J . Camm, you ’re not
going to turn in a 100 percent success rate .
Don ’t let failure ruin your life or even deter
you from having fun. I ’ve always felt like
random hookups require an inordinate
amount of work for the eventual payoff. God ,
that feels good to get off my chest . Look , I
like letting my dick swim in strange waters
as next guy, but I ’m not going to base my
worth as a human being on how often that
happens . You shouldn’t either .
Be Attentive
Take it from a guy who is married , bedding a
random is far , far easier than keeping your
old lady fat and happy on a daily basis.
Listen to what they have to say, learn as
much as you can . TRY. You’ll have plenty of
time to willfully ignore a woman when she’s
speaking once you tie the knot. A well-
placed callback joke about a previous
element of the conversation shows you care
and that you’ re not some self - centered
asshole … even if you are , in fact , one of
those .
Dance
It took me forever to grasp this one . I refused
to go out on the dance floor and gyrate
around like an idiot for too long . Then I had
an epiphany . Women aren ’t looking for
someone who has world - class moves out
there – they are looking for someone secure
enough with himself to look silly in pursuit.
Smell Nice
Not every guy is the best looking guy in the
room. Every guy can practice proper
grooming habits , though . Don ’t smell like a
homeless man, and pop in a breath mint
every now and then. Girls are looking for an
excuse to sleep with you. Cleaning up nicely
could be that excuse .
Have a Unique , Redeeming Personality Trait
The concept of peacocking is long - held to
be a recipe for success. But if you peacock
too superficially , she’s going to lose interest
fast . Be funny , be quirky , be witty , be
yourself . I can ’t tell you how many times I
tried to be something I wasn’t in order to bed
the hot blond from two dorms over . And
guess what ? It never worked . Not because
I ’m not a catch ( Solid 8 right here , ask
around ) , but because a Bro is never as
comfortable with another Bro’ s equipment. If
being the nice guy is your thing , stick to that .
If being a dick is your thing , you should get
another thing , but stick to that in the
meantime .
Tequila
Don ’t be too aggressive with ordering shots .
But it makes you seem fun, and girls are
really just trying to have fun. Just try not to
vom .
Have Dope Sauce Body Language
Interacting with a girl is entirely a confidence
game . More than anything, you have to
believe you are going to get laid, or that you
at least can pull it off . Remember that if you
are interacting with a girl one on one, there
are no rules as to who is “ above ” the other.
You’ re both potentially interested , so it ’s
simply a matter of leveraging that interest
that makes you look as awesome as
possible . Body language , then, physically
appearing to embrace and be in command of
the situation, is paramount .
Make Self - Deprecating Humor So She Feels
Comfortable
We live in a world where it ’s easy to want to
justify how awesome we are - - we’re a
narcissistic generation , perhaps indirectly ,
but social media has certainly changed the
game in terms of how we’re viewed by
others , which in return has made us want to
be viewed in the best possible light . Hence
playing up our strengths, hence coming off
as narcissistic .
I ’ve always found self - deprecating humor as
a great way to deflect this. Even it if you are
so cool , or that thing you are doing is such a
huge deal , remember that you are just a
dude , trying to successfully woo a girl .
Nothing is set in stone . Make her feel
comfortable around you by letting her know
that you don ’ t take yourself too seriously.
Appear to be Interested in What She Has to
Say - - Ask Follow Up Questions
You don ’t have to actually listen. You ’re
simply communicating that you ascribe
value to her in a way that you don ’t to other
people , which is basically a more socially
acceptable way of telling her that you ’d very
much wish to bring her back to your place
and engage in adult activities. Latch onto
something that she says , and try to pursue it
via leading follow- up questions. Even if she
doesn ’t realize it , she’s flattered.
Look , Look Away Dance Floor Tactic The
grimy dance floor is our generation ’s mating
chamber. It requires a drastically different
flirtation arsenal than other settings,
especially when approaching a girl you don ’t
already know:
1 ) Initially show interest by sneaking a look
at her. Lock eyes, fill up that second with an
assertive intensity, but then look away and
go back to doing whatever it is you were just
doing . This will establish your intention, but
do so in a way that doesn ’t completely give
her the upper hand . Maintaining and even
playing field is crucial .
2 ) Repeat this tactic at least one more time
to gauge her interest. Have enough social IQ
to know if she reciprocates in any way.
Otherwise , refrain from being the dreaded
“ creeper ”
3 ) Continue tactic , position your body in a
way that shows interest on your part , and
eventually pick the right spot to introduce
yourself . I ’ve always hated the non - talk ,
automatically start grinding thing - - it seems
quite rapey - - so just preface your interaction
with something as innocent as a “ sup. ”
There’ s a decent chance the blaring music
won ’t let her hear what you ’re saying , so if
you ’re really struggling for words , just mouth
a bunch of stuff and smile . She ’ll smile back .
Don ’t appear to be too aggressive here .
Don ’ t Be a Debbie Downer
If you’ re the type of person who makes
casual conversation by complaining about
how much you hate your job , your
roommates , your financial situation , your
overly expensive rent , or the bar you happen
to be at , you suck . Like it or not , your
bitching kinda makes you bitch . Unless
you ’re establishing common ground by
complaining about your mutual hatred for Ke
$ ha , no one wants to listen to a Negative
Nancy. Don ’t suck .
Don ’ t Talk About Your Ex , EVER
I don 't care if the girl you ’re hitting on has
the same last name , hails from the same
state , or looks like her goddamn
doppleganger , for all intents and purposes,
when you leave the house , your ex is dead .
No one , and I mean no one, wants to hear
about that slut - - your friends included .
Know Things
You don ’t have to be the human equivalent
of Yelp , but it doesn ’t hurt to have a few
clutch spots committed to memory : A great
neighborhood coffee spot around the corner
to cap off a date. A bar down the block
that ’s not quite as loud . The best 3 A . M .
pizza slice on the West Side . That great sake
bombing karaoke lounge that you think is in
K - town. Be a master of your domain .
Compliment Her Without Being Cheesy
Or , be smooth . You don ’t need to pull a Ryan
Gosling “hey girrrrl , ” but you should know
how to compliment her without sounding like
a cheeseball . When she makes a clever point
during small talk , follow up by telling her
that ’s a good point and you never thought of
it that way. Say she has fine taste in XYZ:
movies, music , alcoholic beverages , etc . Tell
her you like something about the way she
looks. Be natural , be sincere.
Flowers and /or Gifts
Works like a charm if you ’re in a relationship .
Become Friends First
Seriously , this one works . It ’s a slow burn .
Don ’t believe all the bullshit about the friend -
zone being an uninhabitable place. Instead ,
think of it as a sex bullpen . The power of
positive thinking is real, people .
Buy a Hooker
I suppose this is technically the easiest way
to getting laid. Unless you can . . .
Be a Woman
Hot chicks that aren’t even famous could get
laid every night of the week if they wanted .
And say what you want , ugly broads, but you
still have it FAR BETTER than your male
counterparts .
WWW.BROBIBLE.COM

thank God the topic is for men only, because i gat nothing to contribute. Anyways first to comment, Guys follow suite

If i quote diz op post nw dem go say i wicked
anyway i read d post finish but must another person lay me 4 bed?

Did u have 2copy the entire thing 4rm d source? do u even realise hw boring it is? u think sey na newspaper u cm sell?