H.B.D WULLNP

The truth is that whatever skill you pick up, upgrade it and learn more about it.
I learnt how to program and develop websites while in school, from there i got a
job in 300 Level and worked there for about a month, and focused on freelancing
now that am out of school i still got another job which am now leaving to focus
full time on creating web applications and developing mobile apps for startups and
small businesses. The point there is learn a skill that can make you self employed.

also read this blog post
http://udonline.net/blog/tackling-unemployment-why-the-government-should-look-at-entrepreneurship/

www.udonline.net

abdulslutsky: Aptitude test is part of interview process. I've had my fair share of experiences with aptitude test. I guess what is being talked about here is oral interview. Hmmm. After series of regret mail from aptitude tests, I managed to scale through the test conducted by one of the big 4 audit firms. I was very happy and overjoyed like I just won a million dollar. Waited for 4 months before I was called for interview/AC. The interview day came and hopes were high. As I wore my suit, I dey see myself as one of the big 4 guys. Quickly, I dashed out of my friend's house and boarded a bus going down to island because the interview was scheduled for 12. The joy of attending interview filled my heart(as per my first time now), I was not even nervous or fidgety. This euphoria made me to miss the way to the venue(just dey waka about one area for VI). I got to the interview venue late amidst sweat and dirty shoes. One beautiful lady directed me to where my fellow interviewees were. On getting there they were all like 'good afternoon'. I responded, as per OAU "aro" boy, I asked them if they were all for the interview of which they responded in the affirmative. Na so I just say "follow me". Oh menh con see as dem respond shaperly .I withdrew and they all laughed. I really got them and it sent a relief of tension into the air. The interview proper. I was interviewed by a four man panel. The interview was going well until one devil asked about my project. Project! I exclaimed. He said yes, na so I just burst into laughter. One lady asked what's funny. "Nothing", I said. I discussed the project ( by lying in some areas though). This devil just caught me red handed in my regression analysis and how those variables fits into the regression. I just dey say "ahm ahm ahm" they caught me( I didn't read it).I never knew the motherf**ker studied econs. Na so the dream of joining that big four end o. Got the regret mail on my way home. Moral. Read your project before any interview.

definitely KPMG

Been seeing dis vacancy for like a year; the vacancy advert never seemed to seize, so I filled the form out of boredom one night.

FF one week, i got an invite for the test, and I think I had about 10k to blow up, so I boarded a bus from PH and 'hurrah, Lagos, here I come'.

Got to the test venue around Ikeja and while my mates were busy discussion likely questions, I was busy checking babes out,,,,,mehn, unemployed babes are the most classy of chicks around .

The test was relatively simple aside words like 'TOTE' whose antonym I didn't even bother to check after the test. Anyway, after choosing some random options, I clicked the submit button, and to my surprise, a 'You Are Successful' page was opened. Magestically, I matched to the room allotted for the writing of the essay. I gave a nice story and barged out of the place.

A week later, I got a success mail. Omo na party I jez dey du thruout that week!!!!! I PASSED, I PASSED....

After the simple documentation, I was invited for the first round of interview. Chai, na there yawa kon gazz oh. Wetin I know wey dem dey do for audit?

Google, devilfinder, ask and Nairaland were the tabs I was jez shuffling on my phone browser. They all helped me to have a fair knowledge of what audit and the company was about before the d day.

1st of July, I woke up by 4am, my heart was throbbing; reason::::::clueless.

I dress up say make I con dey go the place oh, na hin rain con dey fall oh,,had to wait till around 9am b4 leaving my friend's place ((Since the interview was scheduled for 1pm, I felt I was still on track)). On getting out, the flood marauding the street had the height of about the 'imp' in the 'game of thrones'.

I had a premonition that something bad was about to happen, so I went back inside and changed into a t-shirt and jean. I took a bike, and lo and behold, the bike, bikeman and I fell face flat in the middle of the 'flood'.

My story is becoming toooo long, lemme post dis first.

I had a premonition that something bad was about to happen, so I went back inside and changed into a t-shirt and jean. I took a bike, and lo and behold, the bike, bikeman and I fell face flat in the middle of the 'flood'.

I dragged my soaked sef to 'cele junction' and I could see the disgusted look passengers in the bus gave me wen I sat and said I was going to CMS. Long story cut short, I got to VI in one piece, walked around and saw an eatery, walked straight into their rest room and changed into my nice 2piece suit.

Aboyade Cole, here I come.

70 delicious questions were served without meat and cutlery; jez biro, but that was more than enough.

While 'eating', we were called serially for the interview. My number was 6, so I had a lot of time to muster up courage (((courage never came))).

MY TURN.

Them: what's ur name
Me: My name is blah blah
Them: Let's meet u.
Me: Like I said, my name is blah blah.
Them: *frowning* tell us about urself, your family background and any other information u feel is important.

Me: mumbled some words around,,,, ((((the problem here's that as I was talking, I could hear my voice break,,,,,*WHY THE F**K IS MY VOICE SHAKING*..... To make the matter worse,,,,, they all were writing down as I was talking,,,,,,,,*what in heaven are they writing down?* E be like say I don Bleep up big time oh.

...............That's all about myself............

Them: You said in your CV that you possess a good critical and analytic mind,,,, can you tell us one life example where you've exhibited good analytical thinking.

Me: Ehm, Ehm, Ehm,


(Chai, I DON F*CK UP)

@Topelouis, please keep it coming...

Them: You said in your CV that you possess a good critical and analytic mind,,,, can you tell us one life example where you've exhibited good analytical thinking.

Me: Ehm, Ehm, Ehm,


(Chai, I DON F*CK UP)




For about 2minutes I was blank!
Chai, which kind life.
So I asked if I could postpone the question and they obliged.

I knew that the worst had been done nw, I wouldn't be selected, so I switched to what I knew aw to do best, HAVE FUN.

If I won't get this job, I'l forever remain in the memory of these managers.

A couple of questions more and I successfully made dem laugh.

Them: Why do u want to work in this company.

Me: Isn't it obvious I want to be happy, look at your faces,,,,if its only this happy face I want to have coming to this company, I think it's worth it.

Them: (One dude outta them) Hahahahahahahhahahah hehheheheheheheh huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh lalalalalallala babababababab; You don't want to be in my shoes trust me.

Me: Put me in your shoes first and lemme be the judge of that. I mumbled more words about the company aving a nice brand, supporting career growth and all.

THEM: More questions

Me: More answers.

Them: that's all the questions we have for you. Do you av any real life application of ur analytical thinking ability nw.

Me: sharp sharp, I jez construct answer from nowhere (((could see them nodding aggressively,, eating up my words))

Them: Do you have any question for us?

Me: Plenty

Them: You are allowed to ask jez one question.

Me: ok
(My Question)

Them:
(Their answer)
Was outta the building 5 minutes later.


Was stuck in an heavy traffic on the 3rd MainLand Bridge when I got a mail from the company's HR. Chai, my heart pumped oxygen to my hands, sharply I open am. SUCCESS MAIL,,,,,SUCCESS MAIL. I don pass, I shouted in the bus.

Following week, Party, party, party.


Then the second interview,,,, still fresh in memory, I wan go chop first


Forgive my typo errors oh,,,,,,the aroma of the food won't lemme take time to edit this piece b4 posting it. Brb

My experience when it comes to job interviews is nothing compared to the once already posted here but I have something to tell. First is the story a colleague told me in office of how 5 successful job applicants where sent 1500 recharge card each, 2 loaded the cards and never bordered to know who sent the cards while one loaded the card and called who sent the card apologising that she will send it back when she gets the money then the last 2 resent back the card to the original sender. At the end only 3 got the job I know u can guess the lucky 3. The next story was the one my dad told me, he is the general manager of a coy and was told to interview a very pretty girl for the post of account so the first thing he did was to give the girl money mixed in different denominations Ranging from 5naira to 1k sadly the baby no fit count am. The second was a girl who studied accounting and came out with 2:1 was told to define what a larger is and she fall hands, I won't mention the school she passed out from. My point honesty pays and try to have a good knowledge of what ever it is you studied not minding the sorting u did back in school.

Godditex: . I knw is KPMG, they also fall my hand last month during AC.

Always knew I'm not alone. lol.

My brothers and sisters out here well am stil n sch tho! Nd dis tips av been really helpful *laffing all the way* anyone experience to share bout architectural firms interviw or any construction firm lso by january nxt year I wud be applyin for IT placemnt.now am confused do IT student come 2 learn @firms or xpected to contributes like norml workers

we need more interview experience pls

sunsky29:
My own b say na half connection tins o,bt I did d interview o.wen the HOUR ask me how I tk kw them,na simple question wey dem ask me nai I cum dey yarn her the history of the company...she com tire to hear cok n bull storyyyyyy cum say its ok,na so she pen somtin down cum direct me to d nxt office.omo na dia I cum dey nervous like say I dey face to face wit sheqau.....d lady in dat office askd me to sit down,she gv me a writtn question. "Write a short essay abt urslf"omo na 5min o.no tym to tink twice,I write reach 11 rows bfore time go.omo d woman chk my work cum tink say I dey do expo.....3 weeks latter phone ringgggggg.welcom to cway port harcourt.bt I don tire for d work.I just wan gather money for sch.

Hello, do u still work with dem? Wat r deir salary range lik for skilled employees?