By Viola Okolie

I think we ladies virtually short change ourselves when we walk into EVERY relationship thinking it is going to end in marriage, or see every potential suitor as a marriage material.

Sooner or later, something goes wrong and you find the lady wailing, "he dumped me", or the guy gloating about how he used the lady - whatever that word "used" means.

Because we have the marriage mentality, we are also ready to take every sort of bullshit the dude comes up with in order to continue to present ourselves marriageable, workwomen that need not be ashamed, rightly dividing the whims and caprices of
the man.

For instance, someone you are in a relationship offends you, and you do not want to blow your top and be like that "useless Bimbo that cannot keep a man because she has a hot temper", so you grin and bear it. Soon as he puts a ring on it, (your finger that is), like Nollywood, you will commence to unveil a Part 2 that is as unrelated to your Part 1 as ogbono soup is in a plate of spaghetti.

And then you begin to wonder why he is "withdrawn", "chasing skirts", etc.

Sincerely, I do not hold brief for misbehaving men but I think any woman in a relationship who over looks philandering and other forms of misbehaving in order to "keep her man" deserves whatever she gets from that relationship, every single bit of it.

My point? You want to do the relationship thingie? Please be free. Relax, have fun getting to know each other. Be yourself. Do not feel the pressure to be a "good girl" and conform to chauvinist society's expectations of what a "marriage material" should be. He should be able to accept you for the real you.
If he is not interested in knowing the real you, biko ditch the yahoo and move on. He will meet someone who appeals to his ideals sooner or later as you would too.

And do not delude yourself into thinking that
whatever you absorb, overlook, ignore or accept during the dating phase will end as soon as he marries you. Lol. Why on earth do you think men will actually open their mouths and say, "I love my wife, even if she catches me on top of another woman, she will not get annoyed". Because your sorry ass gave him the impression while you were dating that you were cool with whatever he does provided at the end of the day, he validates his misbehaviours with a ring?

Kent compute biko!

Whatever you do, spare yourself, family and friends the agony of having to be a support system when once again, your dreams are hopelessly dashed. Take your eyes off the marriage ball!

My baby has already seen the worst part of me and she is still standing strong...
Be it cos she tolerates my shortcomings or we where meant for each Other.....
I blame people that rush into marriage out of the "madly inlove" syndrome... The question is #wat will keep the marriage strong when love withers? .....
Currently in Jupiter sipping heavenly champagne with my baby

EMEKA1MILLION: My baby has already seen the worst part of me and she is still standing strong...
Be it cos she tolerates my shortcomings or we where meant for each Other.....
I blame people that rush into marriage out of the "madly inlove" syndrome... The question is #wat will keep the marriage strong when love withers? .....
Currently in Jupiter sipping heavenly champagne with my baby

looool. Funny. Nicely written. I envy you bro.