Hian. I can't stand seeing someone getting beat up like that.
I'd fetch a bucketful of water,douse them and run inside before they catch me.
That way the man will have a chance to escape.

aisha2:

Yes oh, so I heard but I was in shock at the level of violence, they stripped this man oh, tore his clothes, rolled him on the floor and their mother was cheering, no one even acted as if anything was going on. One woman was braiding hair outside and she just kept on braiding

cococandy: Hian. I can't stand seeing someone getting beat up like that.
I'd fetch a bucketful of water,douse them and run inside before they catch me.
That way the man will have a chance to escape.

Who knows his crime? What if he molested some ones child?

beeevan:
Who knows his crime? What if he molested some ones child?

No matter what he didthey should not resort to violence na.

Even in rap-e he should be reported to the police forprosecution.

Anyway, it had something to do with some inheritance battle only God knows what they were inheriting to warrant such violence. As far as I am concerned they were shameless same with the mother cheering them on.

Now that I think of it,it may be possible.

But then it would have attracted more attention than that. The attitude of the people around shows they are used to such fights.
So who knows,it might have been another usual fight.

beeevan:



Who knows his crime? What if he molested some ones child?

aisha2:

No matter what he didthey should not resort to violence na.

Even in rap-e he should be reported to the police forprosecution.

Anyway, it had something to do with some inheritance battle only God knows what they were inheriting to warrant such violence. As far as I am concerned they were shameless same with the mother cheering them on.

No matter what he did? My sister it depends, these things are not usually black or white. What will the law do? A certain rapist when I was in school has been arrested more than 10 times and let go. The longest he stayed in cell was a week. Our law enforcement here has no credibility

cococandy: Now that I think of it,it may be possible.

But then it would have attracted more attention than that. The attitude of the people around shows they are used to such fights.
So who knows,it might have been another usual fight.

Very possible, real another usual fight .

The Main problem is most of this women keep going back to them.

There is nobody been burnt by fire that will look on

The day the women feel it's enough, they will naturally know what to do.

It is basic instinct

Please feel no pity for them.

say NO to violence in r/ships/marriages.

Shizzle say so

The only thing I have to say about the Op is that its your type that will meet a doting and very caring man but you will despise him like a piece of sh1t only to settle for some stewpid man who doesn't respect you, i may be wrong thou but from your brief narrative, think I have an idea of your type.

Well that said, I am anti domestic violence and I don't in any way support your man using you to train for the up coming Olympics (Rio 2016), but as some ladies have pointed out, maybe you enjoy being a punching bag, nuff said!

#still enjoying my Sunday chicken, 'tanku don menshun'!

[quote author=damiso]

What is she adding you on FB for?

amebo! Wetin concern u?

OmoAlata1:

you are an idi.ot that for that comment. I pray you will never have a sister,daughter, cousin, friend, niece, etc in a domestic violence situation

I an idi.ot? I gree. Wen u girl child wants to get married,advice her to be mouthy,disrespectful n unreasonable to her husband wen tings arent going well. If d man na short tempered man, u wil remember my comment

[quote author=Dez80][/quote]

What 'discussion' on domestic violence do you want to have with her that you can't havr here that she has to add you on FB?.Your intial post about abuse victims taking the blame for abuse just makes me a bit wary about you counselling her (or any abuse victim) on FB on why domestic violence occurs

All my long post got jumbled up

It is easy to say "Park out!". Park out to where? Who will take you in? Will you seriously leave your fate in the hands of our dear government? What about her job? What if she can't park to a place close enough to go to work? How long before her employer sacks her? What about people, her friends, relatives, those she boasted to on Facebook that "my marriage is made in heaven, etc etc?" Women care a lot about appearances.

Also although the emotions run very high whenever a woman is beaten, an inquiry usually shows that in almost half of the cases the woman may have instigated it or even if she didn't she is not willing to leave because of a "little slap".

If we want to help battered women institutions should be put in place where the woman can be catered for. Do not rush in to fight a man fighting his woman, the best you can do is call the police or carry the woman away from the immediate vicinity to prevent further harm to her person. If you attack the man whatever you get will most likely be on your head.

.

shizzle11: The only thing I have to say about the Op is that its your type that will meet a doting and very caring man but you will despise him like a piece of sh1t only to settle for some stewpid man who doesn't respect you, i may be wrong thou but from your brief narrative, think I have an idea of your type.

Well that said, I am anti domestic violence and I don't in any way support your man using you to train for the up coming Olympics (Rio 2016), but as some ladies have pointed out, maybe you enjoy being a punching bag, nuff said!

#still enjoying my Sunday chicken, 'tanku don menshun'!

Don't be in a rush to judge.as there are men who are irresponsible so there are also women who don't appriciate what they have till they loose it. I am a very sincere down to earth person and I dnt look down on people.am just not lucky with such caring and responsible guys.

Domestic violence is not sometin to enjoy but wen it gets to a stage where life is involve and the man's family is not doing anytin about it then am on my own which is what made me leave with my baby to save my life.

Av been enduring coz of my baby but what happens if I loose my life in d process.

ephee:
Don't be in a rush to judge.as there are men who are irresponsible so there are also women who don't appriciate what they have till they loose it. I am a very sincere down to earth person and I dnt look down on people.am just not lucky with such caring and responsible guys.
Domestic violence is not sometin to enjoy but wen it gets to a stage where life is involve and the man's family is not doing anytin about it then am on my own which is what made me leave with my baby to save my life.
Av been enduring coz of my baby but what happens if I loose my life in d process.

You have power, stay and keep defending yourself to people who would only care about you if you ended up dead and were a story in a newspaper. You left and SURVIVED, that should be your joy and comfort not this futile attempt to explain yourself to total strangers who will always find a way to twist your words and blame you for your abuse.
Come back to Nairaland in 10 years they will still hold on tight to the same belief. You are alive and can care for your child in a sane environment, FOCUS ON THAT

ephee:

Don't be in a rush to judge.as there are men who are irresponsible so there are also women who don't appriciate what they have till they loose it. I am a very sincere down to earth person and I dnt look down on people.am just not lucky with such caring and responsible guys.

Domestic violence is not sometin to enjoy but wen it gets to a stage where life is involve and the man's family is not doing anytin about it then am on my own which is what made me leave with my baby to save my life.

Av been enduring coz of my baby but what happens if I loose my life in d process.

Please dont misunderstand me, i am not judging you. Very true some people are so unlucky in relationships/marriages that they dont meet people who will reciprocate their good gesture and be nice in return and i sadly, you seem to be in that category. Read my post with an open mind, and you will see that the underlying tone in my comment is that you should leave the abusive marriage.

Now in black and white, by all means please negotiate the exit route for your sanity and well being, and for the sake of your child too. Personally, i am against domestic violence neither do i subscribe to 'do or die' marriages and i honestly sympathise with you. Good thing you have left already, cos your life is more important.

Cheers!

aisha2:

You have power, stay and keep defending yourself to people who would only care about you if you ended up dead and were a story in a newspaper. You left and SURVIVED, that should be your joy and comfort not this futile attempt to explain yourself to total strangers who will always find a way to twist your words and blame you for your abuse.
Come back to Nairaland in 10 years they will still hold on tight to the same belief. You are alive and can care for your child in a sane environment, FOCUS ON THAT

Arent you just very silly with this comment? how did my earlier comment relate with this baseless assumption of yours and talk about twisting her words?, and how different was my comment from most people who commented before or after me? Please to the left with your na-me-holy-pass attitude

You were the one psychoanalyzing the OP without basis.how do you know she's the type that will leave the responsible kind of guy for a dead beat husband? Because that's what your firts post implied.

The only thing I have to say about the Op is that its your type that will meet a doting and very caring man but you will despise him like a piece of sh1t only to settle for some stewpid man who doesn't respect you,

Do you know her from anywhere?
How do you know her type?


I think she took that insult in good stride.

shizzle11:

Arent you just very silly with this comment? how did my earlier comment relate with this baseless assumption of yours and talk about twisting her words?, and how different was my comment from most people who commented before or after me? Please to the left with your na-me-holy-pass attitude

cococandy: You were the one psychoanalyzing the OP without basis.how do you know she's the type that will leave the responsible kind of guy for a dead beat husband? Because that's what your firts post implied.



Do you know her from anywhere?
How do you know her type?

My comment wasnt conlusive, there was a caveat. Maybe you missed this:

i may be wrong....i have an idea

i dont know her but i have seen a scenario where the picture i painted in my first comment played out. I re-iterate, i didnt conlude that was the case with her, i only posited its a possibility

cococandy: I think she took that insult in good stride.

It wasnt an insult and so she didnt need to sweat it out, i believe i made myself clearer in my response to her

shizzle11:
Please dont misunderstand me, i am not judging you. Very true some people are so unlucky in relationships/marriages that they dont meet people who will reciprocate their good gesture and be nice in return and i sadly, you seem to be in that category. Read my post with an open mind, and you will see that the underlying tone in my comment is that you should leave the abusive marriage.

Now in black and white, by all means please negotiate the exit route for your sanity and well being, and for the sake of your child too. Personally, i am against domestic violence neither do i subscribe to 'do or die' marriages and i honestly sympathise with you. Good thing you have left already, cos your life is more important.

Cheers!

Aww!cute response.tanks all the same.bless u bro

aisha2:

You have power, stay and keep defending yourself to people who would only care about you if you ended up dead and were a story in a newspaper. You left and SURVIVED, that should be your joy and comfort not this futile attempt to explain yourself to total strangers who will always find a way to twist your words and blame you for your abuse.
Come back to Nairaland in 10 years they will still hold on tight to the same belief. You are alive and can care for your child in a sane environment, FOCUS ON THAT

Tanks aisha. U nailed it.luv u.cheers

Dez80:
Question is, WETIN THE WOMEN DEY DO WEY THE ATTRACT THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?
Shey man dey craze to just beat d woman like dat wen she do noting ni?

Watch dat ur sharp mouth dear,dat is wat annoys ur short-tempered husband or boyfriend!

na so

One of the reasons women stay in abusive relationships is shown by many responses we see here.
You deserve it
You are enjoying it.

The truth is that most women in an abusive relationship are too scared to be rude to the men.
In most cases the man isolates them from their family and friends and makes them feel they are not worth anything and that they have no other option. They even use threats and the women get scared to leave them.
The right environment has to be set for the abuse to succeed.
Most husbands that are abusive are not normal the derive some kind of satisfaction from the abuse.

Thank God you had the courage to put an end to it. That is not the right environment for a woman or a child.

beeevan:




Very, very, possible and could this possibly break down the natural instinct to defend ones self against danger? A lady once told me that she enjoys fighting physically with her man because she likes the way he subdues her during the fight. She also mentioned that she enjoys the apologies and the make up intimacy afterwards.

I visited this lady once, only to meet her in a bloody fight with her younger brother. they were shoving each others clothes down a pit latrine. I had to take to my heels when weapons started flying to avoid collateral damage . So yes, you do have a very valid point.

lol

Dez80:


dats a different thing altogether. Ur man is down, n u are probably using ur current position to disrespect,oppress,make him look inferior,etc hence his annoyance n violence. (many women are like dat,dem dey grow wings wen dem hold pass dia husband)

Please shut up if you don't have anything useful to contribute. You must be a brute in real life.
NB: i don't usually do this but you called for it

mutter:
One of the reasons women stay in abusive relationships is shown by many responses we see here.
You deserve it
You are enjoying it.

The truth is that most women in an abusive relationship are too scared to be rude to the men.
In most cases the man isolates them from their family and friends and makes them feel they are not worth anything and that they have no other option. They even use threats and the women get scared to leave them.
The right environment has to be set for the abuse to succeed.
Most husbands that are abusive are not normal the derive some kind of satisfaction from the abuse.

Thank God you had the courage to put an end to it. That is not the right environment for a woman or a child.

mutter u just said my exact feeling and experience.i sm glad i moved on.not even him or his family has shown up or said anytin.its been six months now.

life goes on.i deserve to be happy.

Dez80:

I an idi.ot? I gree. Wen u girl child wants to get married,advice her to be mouthy,disrespectful n unreasonable to her husband wen tings arent going well. If d man na short tempered man, u wil remember my comment

And teach your male children how to control their temper and not blame all their life woes on women

adebisicutie:

What I learned from that experience is that a woman keeping her mouth shut doesn't guarantee that the man would stop. I believe the man must be a drunk as I don't understand how someone can keeping throwing things at and hitting someone who wasn't even fighting back. He would calm down for some minutes then start again. That's for those saying it's because of what the woman said or did.

Pls tell all these cowardly jerks

ephee:


mutter u just said my exact feeling and experience.i sm glad i moved on.not even him or his family has shown up or said anytin.its been six months now.

life goes on.i deserve to be happy.

I'm happy for you dear. The world is your oyster.

ephee:


mutter u just said my exact feeling and experience.i sm glad i moved on.not even him or his family has shown up or said anytin.its been six months now.

life goes on.i deserve to be happy.

i'm happy for you dear. The world is your oyster.