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How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! - Family - Nairaland

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Ladies How Did You Cope With Morning Sickness / Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores / House Chores You Hated While Growing-Up (1) (2) (3) (4)

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How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by hbabe(f): 3:45pm On Feb 14, 2012
I have been struggling with domestic chores and having a career for months now. I need help!
After the hectic traffic, I get home tired and want to shower and sleep but then someone has to prepare the meals.
I have seen other women smiling through it all and I wonder if they some magic which I lack. sad
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by ronkebp(f): 4:25pm On Feb 14, 2012
Where are you based and how long do you work for in a 24 hr day? do you have kids?
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by agiboma(f): 4:31pm On Feb 14, 2012
Have you tried cooking and freezing teh food so that you can defrost it daily and try to save some time.

1 Like

Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 4:34pm On Feb 14, 2012
Sit your husband down and let him see why you need help . . . It is more joyful when you could do all these things together as well as take lesser time, and you would be able to spend quality time together.
Also, like other have suggested, try and cook enuf for the week, put them in the fridge and you just use the service of a microwave all week long.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by hbabe(f): 5:11pm On Feb 14, 2012
ronkebp:

Where are you based and how long do you work for in a 24 hr day? do you have kids?
I am based in Lagos, I resume 8am and close officially at 5pm but don't get to leave the office till 6.30pm. No kids yet.

agiboma:

Have you tried cooking and freezing teh food so that you can defrost it daily and try to save some time.
I have tried that but it is still stressful.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by hbabe(f): 5:14pm On Feb 14, 2012
Fhemmmy:

Sit your husband down and let him see why you need help . . . It is more joyful when you could do all these things together as well as take lesser time, and you would be able to spend quality time together.
Also, like other have suggested, try and cook enuf for the week, put them in the fridge and you just use the service of a microwave all week long.

Thanks, I will talk to him tonight and hope he takes it in well.

I tried that bulk cooking but I just end up spending my whole weekend cooking and stocking. Will I ever have time for myself?
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 5:16pm On Feb 14, 2012
hbabe:

I am based in Lagos, I resume 8am and close officially at 5pm but don't get to leave the office till 6.30pm. No kids yet.


Will advice that you will have to do what you have to do to make sure that you are able to leave at 5pm . . . that is another hour and half that you could use for your own self
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by ronkebp(f): 5:27pm On Feb 14, 2012
hbabe:

I am based in Lagos, I resume 8am and close officially at 5pm but don't get to leave the office till 6.30pm. No kids yet.
I have tried that but it is still stressful.


Ok, don't worry all you have to do is plan your time, there is no way around it, either you get a professional help and not babies ooo, or you wake up ontime and do your chores, it is either you do it late at night or early in the morning, moreso you do not have kids and do not need to be tidying up the house every second since you both are adults. You have to learn how to multitask and make use of every minute, when you start having children will be a different story.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by feminine A: 6:29pm On Feb 14, 2012
I still feel u don't have a problem n you should do fine since there re no kids yet. However I agree wit d person dat says cook n store. I won't subscribe to househelp 4 u rather a cook dat comes to d house mayb just weekends that does all d cookin n cleanin for u. All u have to do is warm d stews,soup n vegetables while u prepare wat u want to use to eat them
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by moremi2008(m): 6:32pm On Feb 14, 2012
Get a maid and a driver, chikena! Why are you complicating life unnecessarily.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by queensmith: 6:37pm On Feb 14, 2012
This thread made me vomit, and vomit again. Lemme quickly write this before i vomit once more.

You should have named the thread

'HELP ,how do i further send women back to the dark ages!'

Mshew
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Outstrip(f): 7:23pm On Feb 14, 2012
I don't subscribe to spending the whole weekend in the kitchen either but it really should not be this complicated. If you get back from work at about 8pm everyday then your husband really should be part of this process. What in the world are you guys going to do when the babies start coming. Sometimes I wonder how my husband and I survived the first couple of years but looking back now I realized that we ran the home like a freaking military operation. Everything was planned in advance for everything to run smoothly but we did it all together.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 8:01pm On Feb 14, 2012
Outstrip:

I don't subscribe to spending the whole weekend in the kitchen either but it really should not be this complicated. If you get back from work at about 8pm everyday then your husband really should be part of this process. What in the world are you guys going to do when the babies start coming. [/b]Sometimes I wonder how my husband and I survived the first couple of years but looking back now I realized that we ran the home like a freaking military operation. Everything was planned in advance for everything to run smoothly but we did it all together.

[b]That is very true
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Knight1(m): 9:48pm On Feb 14, 2012
DO some immediately e.g wash plates immediately so that washing time becomes part of eating time
Lay bed immediately you wake
arrange clothes well etc
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 9:53pm On Feb 14, 2012
Knight1:

DO some immediately e.g wash plates immediately so that washing time becomes part of eating time
Lay bed immediately you wake
arrange clothes well etc

While she is cooking, is there anything wrong in the husband doing the dishes?
While she is taking shower, is it too much for the husband to make the bed?
If the husband gets home before her, is it too much for the husband to start the process of cooking?
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by mutter(f): 11:15pm On Feb 14, 2012
Poster did you not grow up with responsibilities and chores you had to do? That might be why you are having problems now.
It`s just you and your husband so you are practically just cleaning up after yourselves.
The most important thing is not even the tidying but learning not to make a mess. At the early stage of marriage you should actually be deriving pleasure from keeping a home.
personally I do not see t big deal there are no kids involved. What are you going to do the day you get regnant and it all gets harder.
It`s called taking responsibility. If you are not good at it - learn.
You should not be asking how career women cope with domestic chores because they do. Look for concrete tips on how to get things done effectively.

As for the cooking and freezing - my family does not eat any food after the second day.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Nobody: 11:37pm On Feb 14, 2012
queensmith:

This thread made me vomit, and vomit again. Lemme quickly write this before i vomit once more.

You should have named the thread

'HELP ,how do i further send women back to the dark ages!'

Mshew

I suggest you go and see a Doctor, vomiting that much can't be normal.

@op

Get a Househelp.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Nobody: 11:38pm On Feb 14, 2012
Deleted.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Missy_B(f): 11:45pm On Feb 14, 2012
Get a help when it's just the both of them?
Be ready to get an additional one when/if the kids start rolling in.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 11:49pm On Feb 14, 2012
mutter:

Poster did you not grow up with responsibilities and chores you had to do? That might be why you are having problems now.
It`s just you and your husband so you are practically just cleaning up after yourselves.
The most important thing is not even the tidying but learning not to make a mess. At the early stage of marriage you should actually be deriving pleasure from keeping a home.

As for the cooking and freezing - my family does not eat any food after the second day.

It is different when she now have to look after herself, go to work and yet take care of a big baby called husband . . . let us be real.
When you were growing up, you clean and go go school and most schools are within the walking distance unlike when you are grown and have to be on the road for 4 hours cos of work, and yet get home and cook and clean and still do her wifey duties, let us be real, those times are lot easier than now . . . . . cos most women are now working wifey/Moms.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by taryour(f): 11:56pm On Feb 14, 2012
Op,honestly i assure you that wot u are facing is far from stresful compared to the chores that will be added when your kids start arriving,by then you will have to take care of your hubby,child,do d laundry,cook,sweep,e.t.c. You dont need a househelp yet as your marriage is still young beside you are still very young and have strong bones to go all d way. My advice is sit down and plan how to go abt you chores and make sure you go by the except situations warrant you do so. As for me since i had my son who is almost 6months,i now do most of my cookin n washin in d midnyt,most times i have to put him on my back while i work and i still have time 100% for my hubby,and tnk God for my hubby he as been so supotive and helpful. Best of luck.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by queensmith: 11:57pm On Feb 14, 2012
mutter:

Poster did you not grow up with responsibilities and chores you had to do? That might be why you are having problems now.
It`s just you and your husband so you are practically just cleaning up after yourselves.
The most important thing is not even the tidying but learning not to make a mess. [b]At the early stage of marriage you should actually be deriving pleasure from keeping a home.[/b]personally I do not see t big deal there are no kids involved. What are you going to do the day you get regnant and it all gets harder.
It`s called taking responsibility. If you are not good at it - learn.
You should not be asking how career women cope with domestic chores because they do. Look for concrete tips on how to get things done effectively.

As for the cooking and freezing - my family does not eat any food after the second day.
Thats not career woman talk, there are soo many things in life to derive pleasure from. I own a house- I dont derive pleasure from cleaning it! lmao! your post actually seems a bit like a joke to me!

1 Like

Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by queensmith: 12:00am On Feb 15, 2012
taryour:

Op,honestly i assure you that wot u are facing is far from stresful compared to the chores that will be added when your kids start arriving,by then you will have to take care of your hubby,child,do d laundry,cook,sweep,e.t.c. You dont need a househelp yet as your marriage is still young beside you are still very young and have strong bones to go all d way. My advice is sit down and plan how to go abt you chores and make sure you go by the except situations warrant you do so. As for me since i had my son who is almost 6months,i now do most of my cookin n washin in d midnyt,most times i have to put him on my back while i work and i still have time 100% for my hubby,and tnk God for my hubby he as been so supotive and helpful. Best of luck.

I was about to sleep but i had to respond to this, and your happy in your marriage? Your happy mopping at midnight whhile you carry your child on your back? and your not tired after clamboring into bed hair smelling of cleaning products fingernails of onions with child slobber on your back and your husband is getting ready for wifely duties? and you still call your husband supportive?

Ok i've come to the conclusion that most Nigerian women are delusional, thats the only explaination for the HOT MESS the like to call marriage!

3 Likes

Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by mutter(f): 12:08am On Feb 15, 2012
Queensmith what is career womans talk? keeping a home is not just about cleaning it but entails so much more, but maybe you don´t understand that.
Besides it does not matter how expensive things are, without cleaning and maintenance, they become useless. I actually derive pleasure from cleaning, it is a good way of letting off steam.
I love cooking my own food, so I can determine what I eat.

Anyone who is properly trained as a chid will not have a problem combining a career with their household.
She does not need a house help.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by taryour(f): 12:09am On Feb 15, 2012
@queen
nawa for you oo,ok let me break it down and make it clearer so you dont get it all missed up. I only cook and do d laundry wen my hubby is on night shift duty,and besides my son sleeps mostly during the day and thats when i get some sleep as well when he sleeps in day time. And i only put in on my back when he is tired and crying of being in his bouncer. And yes my hubby is very supotive and helpful cause on his off days while am asleep with my son in day time,he does my chores for and cook too,which means i have extra time to sleep at night at go along well with my buisness. grin
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by queensmith: 12:21am On Feb 15, 2012
Proper training is nothing to do with your household hobbies? If the world was properly trained according to you we will have no einsteins, no astronauts, no doctors no nurses no lawyers no policemen no soilders no judges. The proof of this is the number of women doing the above jobs being very limited, all because of people like you that believe a womans proper training is in the kitchen.
Proper training is raising your child to be upstanding at home and in the community, giving your child ambitions and making sure he/she can be independant. None of these things are determined from cleaning. Unless of course your raising a maidservant = slave = Mutters example of a properly trained individual.

Just because you love doing house chores doesnt mean everyone does, thats why they are called chores, nobody loves to do it but it has to be done. I wasnt raised to be a housewife- I was raised to become a doctor. I wasnt even required in the kitchen until I went to university, then again cooking isnt rocket science so theres no loss there. I clean up after myself and cook for myself when I'm hungry. I redecorate the house when I'm bored and move the furniture around when I want a change of surroundings. I can go on till tommorow mentioning what I do without your military styled kitchen training. and when I marry I expect nothing to change. When I have kids there' will be two of us, tis not difficult washing extra clothes and changing diapers provided your partner helps.
If both Hbabe and her husband cleaned up after themselves and shared the chores together she won't have a problem. He problem isnt lack of training, her problem is the excessive responsibility. Unless one  is to turn herself into subservant of the year like taryour theres no reason the husband canot take care of himself. Esp if the wife has a career just like him.

6 Likes

Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 12:22am On Feb 15, 2012
mutter:

Queensmith what is career womans talk? keeping a home is not just about cleaning it but entails so much more, but maybe you don´t understand that.
Besides it does not matter how expensive things are, without cleaning and maintenance, they become useless. I actually derive pleasure from cleaning, it is a good way of letting off steam.

I love cooking my own food, so I can determine what I eat.

Anyone who is properly trained as a chid will not have a problem combining a career with their household.
She does not need a house help.

Please, could someone tells me what is the role of a man in the house, if the woman has to clean, cook, do this and that, take care of the kids and yet go to work to add money to the family pool of resources . . . .

1 Like

Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by queensmith: 12:23am On Feb 15, 2012
@taryour- ah sorry ooo u didnt mention that before! I thought you were saying op should prepare to carry the child on her back whilst doing midnisght cleaning when the kid arrives. . . . . . I cant even entertain the thought.
Its good your husband is supportive. which he should be. if he doesnt cook will he not eat?  grin grin
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Fhemmmy: 12:25am On Feb 15, 2012
queensmith:

@taryour- ah sorry ooo u didnt mention that before! I thought you were saying op should prepare to carry the child on her back whilst doing midnisght cleaning when the kid arrives. . . . . . I cant even entertain the thought.
Its good your husband is supportive. which he should be. if he doesnt cook will he not eat?  grin grin

Lol . , That is a funny oone
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Metalgoong(m): 1:08am On Feb 15, 2012
@OP

You are a very lazy woman!! . . . . . I pity your husband. sad sad
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by obowunmi(m): 3:22am On Feb 15, 2012
@ Hbabe, nothing wrong in asking your husband for help when you need it.
Re: How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! by Nobody: 3:31am On Feb 15, 2012

I am based in Lagos, I resume 8am and close officially at 5pm but don't get to leave the office till 6.30pm. No kids yet.

no kids yet? then you have not seen anything yet  grin


mutter:

Anyone who is properly trained as a chid will not have a problem combining a career with their household.
She does not need a house help.

a woman leaves for work at 7am,returns at 7pm and you think she will come home to derive pleasure from cleaning, cooking, running errands and fending after children (when they arrive)? is her body a machine? unless you are a housewife or working part-time then I really wish you could share your secret of how you were "trained as a child" to do these things. because you must be a superwoman or something. I really commend you.

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