Fathers often find themselves in a tug of war, caught between the demands of work and those of the family.

The beliefs of fathers related to the family/work balance fell into three types:

Dads that believe work trumps family
Dads that believe work and family are equally important
Dads that believe family trumps work

Regardless of a father's belief, his attitude on work/family balance has significant implications for the family.

Some dads live to work rather than work to live. Mr. Lagbaja believes that he must do whatever it takes to keep his job, so his family takes a back seat to his work. He believes that to fulfill his role as a father he must put his job first. Being a good provider, Lagbaja says, Is fulfilling his role as a father. As a result, he believes he is justified in sacrificing his family for his work, doing whatever he has to do to ensure he keeps his job. Lagbaja appears to be held hostage by his job.

He doesn't believe it would be any different at another company since "that is how it is in my industry, and in Nigeria", so Lagbaja doesn't look for a new job (where is even the work).

For some dads, an effort is made to maintain a fine balance between work and family since they consider them intertwined and equally important. Just as you can't be with your family 20 hours per day and hold a job, or spend 20 hours per day at work and be an effective dad, occasional compromises between work and family are required to maintain a happy medium. For these dads, keeping work and family equal is a matter of pragmatism. On an emotional or ideal basis they believe that family is the higher priority. They believe that fulfilling their role as a father includes being a good provider, in fine balance with family life. They are defensive of family time, being intentional in their efforts to not let work rob their kids and family of time with their dad. One dad adjusts his shifts so he can spend more time with his kids. He'll swap shifts to be at home even for a brief period at dinner time when he can ask the kids about their day. Another dad, a teacher, goes into work early so when he comes home in the evening his family has his full attention. Some dads maximize precious family time by including their kids in everything they do or wherever they go outside of work. Rather than stay in a job that intrudes into family time and is inflexible, many of these dads look for a new job that enables family time. These dads aren't immune from the challenges of separating career and family priorities. In practice they are willing and intentional in their effort to compromise as best they can keep their career and family roles balanced.

Unless a dad is independently wealthy and doesn't need to work, it is normal for him to be confronted with conflicting priorities of work and family. How the father addresses the balance of work and family has significant positive or negative ramifications for all stakeholders; himself, his family, and his employer.

Are You a Dad? How are you able to go balance the pressure of work and family?

Great article.
It surely cant be easy with the economy and all, crazy fees, the belief that the men have to pay for it all, high rent, traffic and work commute. I hail the fathers who go through that all week and come home each day dropping their worries at the gate and scooping their excited kids up high to the sky, giving piggy back rides ad checking home work.
Nigeria is enough to drive one crazy you have to provide your own transport, your own security, your own water and your own quality education, it can't be easy carrying the burden of knowing you have to provide all these for your kids thinking of where, how the money will come yet never letting your kids worry about it for a day or notice your distress for a second.

Finding a balance is key, the world's worries or work loa d will never finish but your kids will grow up, your kids will get to a stage where you may not even exist to them, when they need you, worship and admire you is when they are young, build the bond with them them, you can't defer it, kids won't stay on pause till you have the time.

aisha2: Great article.
It surely cant be easy with the economy and all, crazy fees, the belief that the men have to pay for it all, high rent, traffic and work commute. I hail the fathers who go through that all week and come home each day dropping their worries at the gate and scooping their excited kids up high to the sky, giving piggy back rides ad checking home work.
Nigeria is enough to drive one crazy you have to provide your own transport, your own security, your own water and your own quality education, it can't be easy carrying the burden of knowing you have to provide all these for your kids thinking of where, how the money will come yet never letting your kids worry about it for a day or notice your distress for a second.

Finding a balance is key, the world's worries or work laid will never finish but your kids will grow up, your kids will get to a stage where you may not even exist to them, when they need you, worship and admire you is when they are young, build the bond with them them, you can't defer it, kids won't stay on pause till you have the time.

Great Follow-up aisha2. Am inspired!