Hi, you can alternatively read this on my blog

http://1stfebruary./2014/11/02/10-qualities-every-woman-should-have/

The quality of life and friendships we live and keep quickly become determined by the character traits that have transformed us into who we have become. I recently decided to post certain countdowns and it is no surprise that my first blog post along this line has to do with the ladies! I have compiled a list of the qualities I believe every woman should try to teach herself even if they are not inherent. It is said that after you have been taught character, you should try your best to re-teach yourself properly.

These skills don’t just take into cognisance who the woman is now, it also takes into account who she is growing to be and what her life will entail in subsequent years. This list is by no means exhaustive. Sit down, relax, this is going to be a long one. Let’s start from number 10 and work our way up, shall we?

X. Taking care of yourself: Even though this is number 10, it is definitely not the least important in this list. Personal hygiene is only a part of this multi faceted point. By taking care of yourself it means that you are doing so physically, spiritually, materially, financially, psychologically etc. This means that you pay attention to your health and if possible have an OB/GYN and even a GP. You are sensitive to infections and you take swift action to treat them. You stay around people that build your psyche positively; people that encourage and push you to make the best of your life because they love you and know that you have only one life to live.
Financially, you are saving towards your future. You save, invest and give to people and causes that cannot take care of themselves. You are in an edifying relationship, not one in which you are constantly physically and emotionally abused. You decide to look good for yourself.
Your nails, hair and skin should always be taken care of. Your body is a temple. Eat well. Exercise. Don’t let yourself go just because you are now married or have given birth. Watch your weight even if it’s just to prevent medical complications. Always look good for yourself and your man. He will love and appreciate you more for it. Choose good friends. Offload the bad ones. Protect the content that goes into your brain because its content is reflected to the entire world once you open your mouth.

IX. How to cook: This is one that can be learnt with a little determination. Even if you cannot hire a professional to teach you, remember that Google is your friend. There are so many tips, videos and recipes to learn from. It’s not just about knowing how to cook, it’s about being good and excellent if possible. Remember that “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Even though your house will always have people visiting to have a good meal, you can’t deny that this is a worthwhile quality to have. You should also be able to cook a good meal for yourself. This can also earn you income as you can decide to be a private or weekend chef or even equip you with the skills to start a catering or baking services company.
Apart from being good in the personal sense, this quality ultimately becomes a saving grace when you get married. It is also a surefire way to always get compliments and leave you blushing every time someone tastes your meal.

VIII. Being a good friend/lover: “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” -Proverbs 18:24
Good friends are truly rare treasures to come by in this journey of life. Learn to stop being a broadcasting service when people entrust you with their secrets, hopes and dreams. Let people be able to confide in you. Be there for your friends through the good and the bad. Encourage your friends when the milestones start rolling in and also when they plan on taking commendable steps. Advise them when it looks like they are going down the wrong path. Be a good listener too and you’ll have one when you need. The value of a good friend is always inestimable and cannot be matched. A good friend is always valued, honoured and held in high esteem. A bad friend is always disgraced and unwanted. Be reliable. Let your yes be yes and your no no. Have a peaceful and forgiving spirit not a nagging, bitter and unforgiving one.
Let this goodness also spill into your more intimate relationships. With your boyfriend/fiance/husband, the same applies. Be a rock of support to him. Let him think of you and be at peace that you are indeed reliable. Let him be able to talk to you. Be his best friend. Make efforts to build a solid bond with your partner that transcends sex. Let him look at you and smile in confidence that his days will indeed be peaceful.

VII. Work-Life Balance: If you intend to have any sort of healthy social life talk less of a relationship, you need to put in a lot of effort into achieving a work-life balance. Regardless of how busy your schedule may be, you need to strive so as not to become a “scarce commodity” to your husband and children. You don’t even have to be married to count this quality as noteworthy. Know your limits. Take time to rest if you don’t want to drop dead in your prime. Stop collecting money instead of going on leave if you know that you don’t want to die before you can spend all the money you have been saving to help you achieve your objectives. A proverb says that “the lifespan of a job is longer than that of a human being.”
Trust me, if anything goes wrong with you, a replacement will be available almost immediately. Achieving a work-life balance is not just about our loved ones, it is especially because of us. I remember the story of a 30 year old man who had a stroke because he was doing the job of an entire department. They kept saying that he was the best. His daily schedule barely left out time for him to go home to his family, sleep for 3 hours and get back to the office to meet the 8am resumption time. Guess what, when this happened, they hired a replacement who complained about the workload until 2 additional people were hired. Yes he was compensated, but with a stroke at 30, he had the ultimate wake up call.

VI. The ability to submit/compromise: While submission is a quality that is arguably compulsory only in marriage, the ability to compromise is truly a quality men and women alike should inculcate into their nature everyday.
First things first, you should realise that you will not always have your way in life. You are just setting yourself up for disappointment if you think so. Stubbornness in every matter will definitely get you nowhere far. Whether you call it negotiation or compromise, you will agree with me that it is a quality that will get you further than stubbornness or “agidi” will in a marriage or in the workplace.
When you apply this quality to everyday dealings, you will realise that you are less susceptible to be in arguments or fights with dear friends. Compromise does not mean that you are being ridden over or that you are worthless. It only means that you are strong, wise and considerate enough to listen to what the other person has to say and are willing to arrive at a mutually beneficial conclusion.

V. Ability to do house chores: Nobody is saying that you should be everyone’s maid because you definitely shouldn’t be. However the ability to do basic chores such as doing laundry, washing the dishes, dusting, sweeping, mopping and keeping a clean home in general is a tool that will definitely serve you well into the future.
Personally, I don’t think you should be totally reliant on a maid.. Let it be that you can do what your maid does in your house but because of convenience or preference, you chose to get one instead. Don’t let your house be at a stand still because your house maid did not come for the day. This is a skill that is not just required for when you get married as you will also need it in the years leading to you becoming a married woman. You should be able to sort yourself out in this guise whether you are in your personal apartment, a school hostel, at your parents’ and especially your husband’s house. Trust me, men don’t like “iyawo alapa stainless” o.

IV. Being an asset: This point reminds me of a thread I came across on Nairaland; find that here . This is slightly similar to Number 3. Being an asset means getting rid of the entitlement mentality that most of us have come to let rest in our hearts. It means that you do not leech on to your friendships and “potential suitors” for financial or material gain just because you have your own. Nobody likes a leech. Stop blaming the entire world for your financial troubles. Live according to your means. Above all, get a job for goodness sake! Even after you get the job, look for something you have a flair for and turn it into a business. Better still, monetise your skills be it gardening, making costume jewelry, retail sales etc.
You need to take this point up seriously especially when you are married. If you are an asset rather than a liability, you will soon realise that you and your spouse will be able to achieve so much more in just a fraction of the time it would have taken only him. With joint efforts, you may choose to retire by 40 because you were able to help set up savings, investments and pension accounts for your future. You were also able to help him build at least one house and buy different cars. You were able to help save for your children’s education and maybe a trust fund too.
My blog post holding your own also talks about this point. Be able to support your husband . Anything can happen. He may lose his job or a major stream of income. Alternatively, a bad investment decision may be made which in turn will affect your family. Don’t hold the notion that your money is “my money” while his money is “our money”. That is unfair to say the least.
Help your husband save and invest for the rainy day and he will love you more for this. Being an asset is not just about making the money, it is about spending and contributing it towards the progress of your home. Have that family spirit, the spirit of oneness with your husband.
Whether it is regarding a major project such as building a house or starting up a business or a minor one such as getting groceries for your home, take the initiative and be an asset dear.

III. Self development: If there is one character trait you really need to run away from, it’s COMPLACENCY. You need to always be on the lookout for opportunities to develop yourself in all spheres. If you already have a BSc., well good for you! Look to add a Master’s degree to your academic certifications. Depending on your career path, you can decide to go for a PhD too. There are also several internationally recognised certifications that you can acquire including CAPM, ACCA, CFA, ICAN etc. Imagine your name changing from Mrs. Amy Webster to Dr. Mrs. Amy Webster CFA. Sounds good, doesn’t it?
Furthering your academics also increases your marketability and tells employers that you are always willing to learn.
This point doesn’t just apply to the academics though. You can decide to take a course in cake design or make up or tailoring, start a business etc. Remember, no knowledge gained is ever lost.
Bottom line, always carry out a self assessment and look for ways to enhance the quality of life you are currently living. Read…a lot. Be eager to learn new things. Also, you need to know a bit of something about everything. As Rev Funke Adejumo said, when they are talking about cars or investment, don’t be talking about tomatoes.

II. Self-Respect: When you have respect for yourself, you will know that it is time to leave that abusive/violent relationship. You will take care of yourself in every regard. You will take care of your body and look good for yourself even before anyone else. You will always be careful to build your character. You will not be gullible. You will not sell yourself to aristos because you know that if not anything, that aristo may be the father of your future husband/fiance for all you know. If you do not respect yourself, you cannot love or respect your husband or family. Respect yourself! Have respect for your body and emotions. Never subject yourself to psychological or physical trauma. Don’t think that he loves you because be beats you or that if you leave him, no other person will love you. That is a lie from the pit of hell. I talk about spousal abuse here.
You are way too pretty to be beaten for any tangible or conjured reason. You are beautiful. You are too important. You are confident. You are loved. Stop looking for love in all the wrong places. Dont let somebody else have the master plan for your life. Apart from God, it is only you that can determine the direction your life will take. If you are having a self esteem issue, wake up my dear. Get help. Don’t forget to speak good and encouraging words into the mirror to yourself each day. Believe only God’s report for your life.

I. Relationship with God: I believe that this is the most important quality we should all strive to have. If you have an excellent relationship with God, all other good things will come easy to you. It’s as easy as praying to God to forgive you of your sins and make you his child. Read your bible, pray, continuously strive to imbibe the characters that Jesus exhibited. In your speech, thoughts and actions, always work towards becoming a better person. The fear of God and faith in Him really make the impossible possible.

I’ll be doing something on the guys too as time goes on. At the end of the day we need to strive to become better ladies each day. As the Yorubas will say, di e omo okunrin o to. I believe that applies to the women too.

Source: www.1stfebruary.

Incase

*sends write-up to my publication*
but you should also know that NLanders hate long essay like this.

Lol. You guys can check out the blog naa . And I tried to bring them out as points. Ema binu o eyin baba mi!

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Hmm...I wish they will understand...

Some of us do...... I'm sure some ladies will have this same reaction when the one for the guys is out. @emusmith

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Enjoy

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nyc post

Read and share

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Read and share

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some will not read, they will be saying,"nice post! this and that" smh! well! i didn't read it so bye!

Nneka123:
some will not read, they will be saying,"nice post! this and that" smh! well! i didn't read it so bye!

But you sha commented . Thank you regardless babes

This a front page post ooo, MOD

larrytopsy:
This a front page post ooo, MOD

Thank you boss

Thank you

Please read and share

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Read and share

sorry op cudnt read d 1st line

mirexxx:
sorry op cudnt read d 1st line

Lol. You are just a clown.
Please check out www.1stfebruary.com though

ifeojobas:


Lol. You are just a clown.
Please check out www.1stfebruary. though

won't check anyfin lol

incase

mirexxx:
won't check anyfin lol

I forgive you

ifeojobas:


I forgive you

how na did i ask for it

mirexxx:
how na did i ask for it

You don't have to ask.... But you're welcome

ifeojobas:


You don't have to ask.... But you're welcome

ok

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