Dont knw y am nt even moved by dis. D guy was married, u went ahead to marry him nw ur ranting dat u didnt snatch sm1's husband? U tink d wife wld jst fold her hands n watch u steal her husband away frm her simply cos she no get children? Ur d wicked 1 my sister and dnt even bring GOD into dis cos na u HE go punish.
And to ladies, grow up jor! Get ur own man n stop settling for 'crumps'.
NEXT? rolling my eyes.

Ishilove:
They used her star to open the first wife''s womb, because how else can you explain the four months difference in both their children's ages?

When a man tells you about issues with his wife, jump and pass. Marriage is not the beginning and end of life.

funny but true if not y both of em have both 2 and y afta 4 month of her getting hers d oda wife get pregnant don't even know wat 2 type again

Wendy80:


So true. B4 I got married, any married man complaining abt his wife to me, hmm I run with my heels touching my ogoo(back head) cos that's how it starts oh.

A close friend of mine might end up like ds( God4bid) if she's not careful cos she's always hanging around "I wanto divorce my wife" kind of men. Warned her severally she no wan hear.

The complainant stance has been an age long trick that works for mischievous married men, greedy ladies keeps falling for it and many more will fall. i really don't feel anything for a lady that decides to put herself in such precarious situation, i don't believe in a single girl being friends with a married man, most often it doesn't end well.

double dating is one thing, using and dumping someone is another this which is fvcking painful not to talk of being married to just for gains and then dumped.... Why are some people soo fvcking wicked and stone hearted??.. To the lady in questions, there are still people who will accept love and happily marry you with your kids and love them like their own.... My uncle is an example..... His wife had kids b4 he met and married her nd I just knew 2 of his kids arent his cos U'll never believe they re someone else's kids.... Just move on.... Someone is waiting for you....

Guess she married for money

I felt really sad for him and tried to cheer him up the best I could till my Industrial attachment came to an end and I left. About a year after our paths crossed again, he told me he was single and asked me for a relationship which I obliged. Everything was fast, he came with his family to meet my parents and ask for my hand in marriage, we got married and the kids came in quick succession, his job took him away a lot of times, sometimes for weeks or even a month , he isn't around.

Some babes and their desperation for marriage. hmmmm.. Now it's looking like you will be rushing out of it the same way you rushed into it.

jingh:
where he/she go b4

It's about her comment on the couple using her star.

Ishilove:
They used her star to open the first wife''s womb, because how else can you explain the four months difference in both their children's ages?

When a man tells you about issues with his wife, jump and pass. Marriage is not the beginning and end of life.

Star? Don't believe in that. Otherwise, there won't any couples without children left.

Mondisweets:
Even his family was involved a normal woman would be of the reasonable belief that he really is being genuine, unless you were expecting her to stalk him when he is out and about... Hire a private investigator she may not be able to afford or go ask ifa

Only God knows where all the desparation and greed ideas came from.
Do you always stalk or psychoanalyse everyone you date?

The emboldened had me in stitches Doesn't seem like such a bad idea though....hmmmm.....

byvan:
She had it coming, single ladies should wait for single men and stop lingering around married men hoping to become the next best thing in their lives . She wouldn't look twice if this man was broke, let her bear the consequences of her indiscretions. If you are going to marry a divorcee, get in touch with the ex and ask questions. Walk out of the mess if you are really tired .

thank u. U hit d nail on d head. If d man was broke and single, she won't look at him twice. She went for gold not minding if d man was properly divorce. She had single toaster but because dose ones were still struggling she went for already made. Well done oooo

Ishilove:
They used her star to open the first wife''s womb, because how else can you explain the four months difference in both their children's ages?

When a man tells you about issues with his wife, jump and pass. Marriage is not the beginning and end of life.

How u take get sense like this sef? On point!!

duduhemit36:

d funniest tin is dat pple like dat will consider u jealous..

Yes oh. She has even stopped gisting me abt her relationship cos she can't stand d truth I tell her. How can a man be telling u I wanto divorce my wife so I can marry U and u believe him. And she'll even be asking him how far with d divorce thing now.. so disgusting.
I give up on some girls

Ishilove:

Source: http://www.stelladimokokorkus.com/2015/01/new-years-day-chronicles-of-blog.html?m=1

Wat I will say is let go. God will surely intervene n fight for you. men re deceivers. He brought fake parents. His parents re dead. God knows all. don't wait for him. get urself employed n train ur children. u will travel rud d world wen God opens the way.

Mondisweets:




i repeated myself and you still missed this part if you're gonna be sassy at least get the facts right first.

YOU WERE SIMPLY STUPID AND GREEDY...

What soever you sow,thou shalt reap..dnt worry ma'am,karma wil come on them..

protegesol:

Does anything like child support exist in Nigeria?

In Lagos State, yes. But law enforcement isn't anyone's strong point in Nigeria's.

Fourwinds:
thank u. U hit d nail on d head. If d man was broke and single, she won't look at him twice. She went for gold not minding if d man was properly divorce. She had single toaster but because dose ones were still struggling she went for already made. Well done oooo

ONLY GOD KNOWS WHO SHE DUMPED AND SMASHED HIS HEART INTO A GAZILLION PIECES, MAKING HIM A MONSTER TO OTHER GIRLS. CRAP!!!

nobody use you and dump you, you actually did not use ur brain at the right time

HOW CAN SOMEONE THAT HAVE BEING MARRIED FOR 10YEARS WITHOUT CHILDREN SUDDENLY TOLD YOU HE WAS SINGLE AND REQUESTED A RELATIONSHIP?

OKAY. PLS ANSWER THIS SIMPLE QUESTION O. DID YOU ASK HIM FOR THE DIVORCE LETTER BEFORE PUTTING YOUR HEAD? OR YOU WERE SIMPLY CARRIED AWAY WITH HIS WEALTH?

MizMyColi:
I really wish ladies would learn from this story and steer clear off married men.

Whether they claim divorce or not, please keep your distance until you're able to put two and two together.

Unmarried ladies should limit contact with married men, it is not good for their image.

This is sad.
Those couples in the OP must have done a voodoo of sorts on the young lady. She became a willing pawn in their game

You are very correct. There is this lady who was my roommate in the university...nice, kind and cool headed.She met a guy sometime two years ago, the guy claimed he was single.Along the line, she got pregnant, the guy told her they can't get married because he's a good Christian and can't marry a pregnant lady. (Shebi dem force am sleep with d gal abi)

I met her recently and she narrated how the guy deceived her.She only got to know the guy was married when she was about to put to birth.Now she is a single mum and she isn't happy.

Some men are just out to deceive ladies, ladies should be more careful.

Ishilove:

Source: http://www.stelladimokokorkus.com/2015/01/new-years-day-chronicles-of-blog.html?m=1

Nollywood.... I have watched the movie, title is; BROKEN HOME

Since he came with his family to come seek your hand in marriage what steps has your family head taken to resolve this matter OP

FLYGERIAN91:
double dating is one thing, using and dumping someone is another this which is fvcking painful not to talk of being married to just for gains and then dumped.... Why are some people soo fvcking wicked and stone hearted??.. To the lady in questions, there are still people who will accept love and happily marry you with your kids and love them like their own.... My uncle is an example..... His wife had kids b4 he met and married her nd I just knew 2 of his kids arent his cos U'll never believe they re someone else's kids.... Just move on.... Someone is waiting for you....

I WISH YOU WERE THE GIRLS BOYFRIEND THEN WHEN HER BOSS CAME TO PROPOSE TO HER...I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THAT BULLSHIT LOOK ON YOUR FACE WHEN SHE CRASHES YOUR RELATIONSHIP. AS FOR THE GUYS THAT CAN MARRY HER AFTER THIS KINDDA CONTROVERSY...THEY LIKE TOKUNBO TINS.

I am deeply sorry for what happen to u.

This reminds me of what happen years back,when my girlfriend got married with unknown man,cos of mundane things and at the end she regretted the action till today.

I believed b4 u got married with this man,u might be in relationship with promising guy then,but na story for the gods now.

Fourwinds:
thank u. U hit d nail on d head. If d man was broke and single, she won't look at him twice. She went for gold not minding if d man was properly divorce. She had single toaster but because dose ones were still struggling she went for already made. Well done oooo

The Gold has dug her out.

MizMyColi:


Clearly, she was already coveting the man and thought she could be the solution to his problems.

Which is why she didn't take the pains to find out the truth for herself --- if only she applied some brain.

Now, what do we blame her current predicament on?

Her desperation and gullibility or greed?

**modified**

Someone quoted me and talked about going with his family --- that's a good point.

Is there a possibility the "family" was deceived too?
Or were they in on the whole thing?
The human race isn't particularly known for "Goodness."


This isn't me trading blames. Trust me, I feel this woman's pain, I'm just not willing to put it all in writing at the moment.

But as ladies, we need to learn. We need to stop taking things at face value and put on our thinking caps.

It's okay to live and love like your life depended on it.

However I believe that there is a spirit in man, the inspiration of the almighty gives us understanding - of what is right, of what is wrong, of what to do, of what not to do.

I can bet my Nairaland account that before she decided to go on with this man, there were red flags, ones she ignored for whatever reasons there might be. That's if she even took time to court him first or thoroughly listened to her inner light.

and might have friend zoned the serious, single guys coming her way.

the lady is obviously pisces born....she fell in love and married the man out of pity.....

Hmmmmm, this case is pathetic my dear poster.
First, were you really desperate and so much in a hurry to make you not even to think of you and him visiting his own parents and even home town to know them first?
I always advise ladies to insist on all these kind of minor visits and interactions , always take your time to make your investigation and be sure before you say i do.

Having said that, all i make out of this issue is that , the man is such a callous and mean man. He doesn't imagine how you will feel.
All you just need to do is to look for a professional on marriage issues to counsel you, and if you are a Christian, seek the face of God He will bring help your way. Stay strong and may God watch over you and your kids.

Well I have to say I'm quite sorry about your situation and I hope things would turn around for you real good and soon. From my analysis, you will permit me to say that you are part of the problem that befell you, what God has joined together..let no man put asunder, I'm sure the other time he came to you, you neglected the investigation you were supposed to diligently carry out about him and his family, leaving everything to hope, faith and fate..sometimes we just have to be responsible for our actions..well, this is not to make you feel bad but ofcos its just a reminder of d past because it is what gave birth to the present situation..mind you, this is not where we are going..

Now back to the matter at hand, I think the solution to this situation is not to start feeling piteous and miserable, it has happened yes, they say there's nothing new under the sun, so yours won't be the first or the last on earth, what I would advise you is to get yourself up, get a job, start a trade, keep fit and look happy, that way you can take stress off your sleeves and take proper care of your kids the way you want, who knows, another good suitor may come your way, that's for later though, your primary focus now should be yourself and the kids..and as for the man in question..trust me what goes around comes around, this is africa where you don't get away with some things, because they would end up hunting him some day, he would definitely come back someday and beg you for his misdeeds..he would shed tears lyk that is the only hope he's got..then you would have a choice to forgive or not..these are things that we see happen everyday..

In conclusion, this should serve as advice and lessons to all our ladies within the about to marry zone..never allow a man to push you in between his home so you won't befall such peril in future..and if there's anything unclear or too clear about a relationship likely heading to marriage, kindly pray diligently about it till you get answers and convictions..do your homework also..and why I said too clear about a relationship is because we men can act perfect for you..and they say if its too good to be true..its probably not true..so don't be carried away..mai fellow readers..be wise..marriage aint no joke..hope mai story no too mussh..

MizMyColi:



X'cuse me Ma'am.

This man didn't ask her to date him or become a concubine, he asked her to marry him and "and she obliged" --- just like that.

Jeez! Whatever happened to common sense?

Whatever happened to asking questions.

Someone I haven't seen in a year, pops out of the blues and asks me to marry him, so hastily for that matter. I have been in Nigeria long enough to know that Men aren't so keen on marriage, now if one comes at me with such proposal, an allegedly divorced one at that.......

Call it stalking, call it psycho-analysis, if it pertains a life long decision where I'd mostly be on my own, common sense, even when it's not common requires that I do some background research. I really don't know about other people but as an individual, I've never made a decision while relying totally on my inner light and ever regretted.

Capische?

goodies block normal functioning of the brain. it kills common sense

dorlapoh20:

Reasons are best known to her,from what i read i think she felt sorry for the man.
Even if those u metioned were her reasons which i really doubt no man has the right to lie, use and dump a lady. The lady was used as an open door to their child bearing. The man should have been truthful to her in the first place.
And do you know what? she would agree if what she wants is money.

she felt sorry for the man Singles girls stop feeling sorry for any guy both married and single .they just want to drill you with their pity stories . Which married man will not give you story that touch just to chop and run ? Close your legs umu ashawo .

stagger:
"My God will judge them".

OP you are funny. Which God? Have you not read the bible where it clearly siad that God is not mocked? You had no qualms marrying a man you knew was previously married and by definition, not available for you while his wife was still alive. Now you call God to judge them. The man and his wife now have kids. They are the ones legally married. You are nowhere. Better take your life and keep moving. Don't bring God into this matter.

hmmm. True talk. We have people wel dey reason well well here.

Nairalanders will always amaze me. See useless responses, some even calling her greedy. Do you people read at all or are your brains clogged up due to the amount of pollution in Nigeria. I will not be so quick to condemn the poor woman based on a few things.

1: Nigeria operates in both the physical and spiritual realm. ( Who knows maybe the guy was told that in order for his wife to bear children for him, he must mate with another woman)

2: We all know how Nigerian bosses are. They get really close to their employees and sometimes take advantage of them easily.

3: If you developed a friendship with a guy and after a while he informed you that his situation has changed(often times thru a sad, pathetic format), you would feel pity for him. If you like the guy a little before, the likeness will multiply times 100 and feelings develop.

4: It is possible the guy's family were in on it, this makes it very believable!

My advice to any woman is to always insist on a court wedding. This way you can be rest assured of at least the possibility of a court settlement followed by a divorce. Also shey the woman no get family ni, if someone did this to my sis, na war o!