Who has seen Texanomaly lately? She needs to be here as she's Flow's biggest fan. I be Flow's Ac
#Stillifollow.

FLOW NWANNE...!!

Psalm 23





The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.








“The Lord is my Shepherd” Often times, I see myself as either a sheep astray or an outright goat. I refused to be guarded by the one true shepherd, the Lord Supreme.




“I shall not want” Well, wanting had always been my second name. If it wasn’t Garri, then it was Beans, even the least 10 naira for groundnut for my Garri, I most times lacked.


“He makes me to lie down in green pastures” Mine wasn’t green, it was red. I most times lied down in red pastures, all thanks to Sandra and her boyfriend Snow that occupied the bed.


“He leads me beside the still waters” The water we drank most times was still and dirty, and other times reeked. Yet we drank saying; “dirty no dey kill black man” forgetting our dear friend Cholera.





“He restores my soul” That was if I allowed Him. I will rather allow alcohol to do that.



“He leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake” But I rather walked in the paths of my unfaithful friends like Otukpa.



“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil” Severally I walked in so many valleys.

Valleys like when I was by inches almost ran over my a “911” in the expressway when I was still working as a delivery man at Wilo.


Valleys like when Faith told me she was pregnant for me.



Since she was still “flowered”, so there was no course for alarm, so I did it raw without a c’ondom. For record sakes we both “d’eflowered” each other, and it was really historic.






In SS3, writing letters was the in thing, albeit we wrote to each other to develop our writing skills. I was so unimportant to my classmates that no one wrote even half a letter to me, but as it were I wrote a handful to others. The numerous “letters” I received were to buttress the fact that my head was big which I already knew. So I most times received cartoon animation drew in a sheet of paper, while my seat partner received countless love letters from his crush.


A sheet of paper was passed to me one afternoon while we had mathematics. I concluded the sheet of paper was either from David who drew cartoon animations indicating how big my head was, or from Ayo who did the same but perfectly.

But as I turned the reverse of the well folded sheet of paper, I saw “To High tension”.

There was no other know as High tension other than yours truly, so I opened it.


It read:


“I am not feeling too well, I hope I am not pregnant?” Short but the message pierced like an arrow into my heart.

I would had concluded David or Ayo wrote it, but the handwriting said otherwise. No other could write that way but Faith, at least that I was sure of because haven borrowed her Notebook severally, her hand writing had registered.


I turned to see if someone was spying at the letter from behind, no one but me, except there was another "me" seated right behind me. Surely no one opened the letter during delivery, as it was the rule never to read someone’s letter or view someone’s cartoon drawing.




I read the content of the letter about fifteen times wishing it was but a dream.

“why my own dey like this!”

“my first time, and she com get belle for me”

“my parents will kill me”

“but I am too young to marry”



I said a rather long prayer with my eyes open even though I knew there wasn’t a connect with God.


When my face and that of my wife to be met, she nodded indicating the letter was from her.


I saw myself in a very deep valley with darkness hovering.




As tears gathered in my eyes, my seating partner who all this while was busy solving the mathematics sum we were given turned to me.

“High T, why you dey cry” He said, “na the maths wey them give us make we solve nahim dey make you cry?”


If only he knew?

If only he knew why a man cried?


If at SS3 I was a man already, then I should be man enough to handle that sad news. Or so i thought.



“no be maths dey make me cry”







“you!! Stand up!” The mathematics teacher thundered all of a sudden.

“who me?”

“yes you!”

I stood up pocketing the letter.


“why are you not working?”


As I hurriedly wiped out the tears in my eyes, he saw me did that and asked; “why are you crying?”

“I….. I…… I am not crying sir!” I stammered, “I have eye problem”

“you bloody lair!!” He attacked, “is now that you have been given class work that you suddenly developed eye problem!” And the whole class laughed.


“come out here Mr. eye problem!!”.

“Mr. High tension!!” The whole class corrected him.


“is that his name? High tension?” The Teacher asked. And that was in the era when classroom population was above 120. And for the likes of us that sat at the back seats, we were inconsequential.



“Mr. High tension eye problem!!” That was indeed a nice name, (HTEP).

“can you tell us the square root of 25?” that was what the mathematics teacher asked, but in my mind the question played as “can you tell us the first number in 25?”.

“25?” What Nursery question.

“yes! Tell us”

“the answer is………………………”

“is what?” The teacher thundered.

“is…… is……. Is two” The whole class laughed. That singular act added “two boy!” to the numerous nicknames I had.







After school that day, Faith apologized for the embarrassment the letter she wrote to me caused. She told me she wasn’t pregnant, that she was only pulling my legs.

I was so so relieved yet I doubted.


That was in the era when as funny as it sounds I thought the belly of a pregnant woman starts bulging two days after having sex.

For two days, I missed school telling my mum I was ill all because I needed to observe if Faith's stomach will grow.












“You can only make God your shepherd when you give your life to Christ, so this is a call…………………………”

“is there anyone here that wants to say no to sin, and yes to Christ?”

I have heard so many sermons all my life, but that particular sermon was different; it really went straight to my bone and broke me down.

“is there anyone that wants to make the Lord his true Shepherd? Is there anyone that wants to give his life to Christ and become born again?” The preacher ended the torching sermon with a great call.


Bush shaker tapped me as he saw that I was really torched and was about standing up to obey the alter call.




“enemy of progress” I cursed within.

Ezeebube2:
Who has seen Texanomaly lately? She needs to be here as she's Flow's biggest fan. I be Flow's Ac
#Stillifollow.

True talk!! i really miss texanomaly. By now she for don dey tell me make i interpret all the slangs for this story, say she no dey understand them.

I duff hat 4 d guy wey make me register for nairaland....

Tho' I no flow with "Man Wey Dey Reason" when u dey write am o, but when I read am finish, come read dat "Ibo boy wey like Yoruba" and "Barack boy", I know say Flow na really Flow.

I don reach here o, abeg update Xo I go flow with u dis time...


And leave Ishilove alone, she no be spam-bot.... jus dey let her knw anytime d mumu robot ban u, so she go dey unban u...

I am thinking u don pm her b4 2 b ur miss world/English buh she "ranned" because of ur bicycle seat head..


dis ur head dem wey u dey describe, na laff u go take kih me..


I dey flow with u nnwannem

flow1759:



True talk!! i really miss texanomaly. By now she for don dey tell me make i interpret all the slangs for this story, say she no dey understand them.

She don dey sabi well well.

24th of December and there was not a job for Flow yet.




Since I repented of my sins and turned a new leaf, my friends saw me strange.

“Flow why you just dey always do your face like s’hit?” Snow said.

“how I take dey do my face like s’hit?”

“you no dey smile again na?”


“forget that one” He said, “e get one place wey we go go next tomorrow wey be boxing day oh!”

“were be that?” I asked.

“na Kalabari”

“Calabar! Wetin we dey go Calabar go do?” I thought I was going to hear him say we were spending our Christmas in Obudu Cattle ranch.

“no be Calabar I talk, I say Kalabari”

“where be Kalabari na!” I was thinking the place was maybe in the North.

“na for one of my friend village, him say make I come perform as MC for one of their show!”

“where the village dey na?”

Had he mentioned anywhere North, for fear of Boko Haram I would had declined going instantly.

“na for Rivers state here na” He replied.

“shey him go pay you to do the MC?” I asked.

"yes na!"

“ok, no wahala, we go go” I saw it adventurous.















Christmas came with its usual glow, and aroma of rice and stew everywhere.



As I opened the door, the first face I saw that morning was that of Landlord.

“Oga Landlord merry Christmas oh!”

“ehen Flow, merry Christmas!!” He replied, “them my pekin never give una Christmas Rice?”

“Christmas wetin........?” I asked.



Why I asked was because Christmas Rice from Landlord meant only one thing, sacrifice Rice.


The people that came to his shrine for spiritual cleansing always offered him a token to thank him, some of which offered items like rice, groundnut oil, tin tomatoes e.t.c. All these items were left in his shrine till they were exhausted.

Often times you hear; “Bobo! Go bring three cup of rice from shrine”.

“Miracle go bring tin tomatoes for shrine” And such and such.

I am not against storing food items in the shrine, what I kicked against was the fact that nothing from the Landlord touches my mouth. The closest was when Miracle his daughter offered me biscuit and I refused, yet she forced it on me. I gave her a dirty slap for ever forcing the "biscuit of the gods” on me.











“Christmas Rice na” He said.

“Oga Landlord!!! Abi na we go give you Christmas rice? Rice plenty for our house oh”

Before I finished saying that, his daughter came with a plate of Rice.

“brother Flow, see rice oh, na for una!” She entered our room.

“brother after I go come take the plate oh” She said as she left.

“come take am now oh!” I almost said, “food wey I go soon troway”.







“oga landlord give us food oh” I informed Snow who just came from the gym.

Lately Snow had been hitting the gym on regular bases, and his biceps had immensely increased.


“why him give us na?”

“why him no go give us, today no be Christmas?” I queried.

“I no dey chop that food oh” Snow declared.

“me too oh”





Few minutes of Landlord's food aroma making I and Snow salivate, then came Junior. Junior the glutton.



“wetin dey happen ?” He said.

“merry Christmas Junior” That was the greatest mistake I made on Christmas day; telling a Witness “merry Christmas”, I had sinned.

“what do you people that call yourselves Christians celebrate Christmas for?” Argument don start be that.

“the birth of Christ, the reason for us being Christians” Snow took that right off my mouth.

“how sure are you that Christ was born on 25th of December?” He added.

“because so the Bible told us” See Snow that read the Bible once every year saying what the Holy book said.

“is there anywhere in the Bible where Jesus said we should celebrate his birthday?” To some extent, that was true.

“he must not say it, we mark the birthday of the saviour of the world in remembrance of what he did for humanity”






“oboy stop to dey argue, see food chop” I was sure hunger caused Junior's blasphemy; hunger has always caused it.

“who cook am?” He balanced.

Before I knew it, three spoons had gone into his mouth and swallowed.

“make una collect spoon join me na?” He offered.

“we? We don chop oh, we don belleful, in fact we dey find where we go vomit the one wey we chop” I said frankly, “you no see as our belle big”.




“ok oh!!” As he munched the first piece of meat, I swallowed 50 litres of saliva. I was really hungry.

“who cook the food?”

“na na na na Sandra” I lied.

“she cook am yesterday night”

“were she dey na?” He asked.

“she don go her Mama house?” Snow answered.

“why una no call me make I come chop with una yesterday night na?”


“you wey go your babe house go sleep, so you expect us to call you make you come follow us chop?”

“yes na!”

“nahim make we remain your own for you na?” Snow added, “Because we know say you go come this morning”

“omoh, the food plenty oh, I no go fit finish am oh” He was half way.

“finish am oh!! We no wan remain any food oh” Snow and I said at the same time.

“because Sandra dey come cook another one today” I added.


I Saw Junior’s eyes increased in size as he munched the third and last piece of meat.

“make this one no change to cat oh” I prayed.






“I bring drink oh!!” Junior said after eating.

“ehen!! Where am?” I, that had repented.

“e dey for my bag”

“two red label”




Snow and I started drinking while we waited for Junior to turn to cat.



The red label cleared the gangway for too many.

flow tanx gods u r back because my parents bin don de ask me since wia u de I tel dem say maybe u r one of d ppl wey kidnappers catch for agbo delta road. but tanx jar say I don see u for lafia road. maybe wen I get home today I go tel dem say u r tracking for buhari frm bornu to fct

texanomaly:


She don dey sabi well well.

I miss you baby

dis one short o

flow1759:


I miss you baby

Awww...thanks

I started reading. Then got busy. I'll try to catch up by this weekend. At work right now.

lol @the last update.

I swea junior go key person today

Mehn.....Flow....u don dey make me laff anyhow for crib. shuo....u funny die. thanks a lot for d comic relief....stil you flow...cheers

kaymolla:
Mehn.....Flow....u don dey make me laff anyhow for crib. shuo....u funny die. thanks a lot for d comic relief....stil you flow...cheers

Still we Flow together

stuff46:
lol @the last update.

I swea junior go key person today

You enjoyed it?

I too enjoyed it..


I often read what I wrote to see it in the eyes of you guys

Finally, i caught up with una..
Wow! Very fascinating.. Oga flow i commend ur great work here

This last update was rily funny,i couldn't help the laughter even tho was in a commercial transport,well done flow

Stil u flow..
Flow baba correct niqqa, u funny die. I strted reading xterday night and guy I never sleep since den. Kudos guy u d best comic writer I've met on NL.
U're good in writing dialogues, try ur hands on script-writing «I hear say smartdon Academy dey run am, dey are located at Location Road» maybe u no go need dat Oil company work afterall Bible tlk say a mans gift maketh way for him.
I rep P-side too.

gregzone:
Stil u flow..
Flow baba correct niqqa, u funny die. I strted reading xterday night and guy I never sleep since den. Kudos guy u d best comic writer I've met on NL.
U're good in writing dialogues, try ur hands on script-writing «I hear say smartdon Academy dey run am, dey are located at Location Road» maybe u no go need dat Oil company work afterall Bible tlk say a mans gift maketh way for him.
I rep P-side too.

Thank you

Location road?

Where is that?

flow1759:



Thank you

Location road?

Where is that?

Flow don hamma

Christmas to some is full of fun, and more fun, but to me, it was full of drink, and more drinks.



After red label, I entered Alomo bought by Padiman.

Then from Alomo, it was Orijin at Goldberg.

There are drinks and there are drinks. That day being my first “Orijinal” day, I told myself there was no other than Orijin, aside 1759 of course.

With respect to my brand 1759, after I drank a bottle of origin, I swayed to 1759 my elder brother Femi.


If only one is given a job according to their passion for any brand, then the best place I should work is Guinness Nigeria Limited of course.

Any section I will be posted to work, I will work with so much passion bearing in mind that the brand depended on me. But if you ask me, I will say the brewery section will do.






I remember the story Angom while I was serving told us.

He said he did his Industrial Training in Nigerian Breweries, that he worked in the section that transported the brewed beer form the storage tanks to the bottles, and most times they always carried out routine checks on the storage tanks.

He said one afternoon while they opened an inlet to one of the tanks to check the flow of the beer it contained, a colleague of his Tunji fell into the tank and was drowning.


Tunji wasn’t a good swimmer so Angom thought he was dead. Surely, there were no lifeguards on ground.

“Tunji!! You still dey alive?” Angom yelled.

The response Angom got was a bubbling sound.

“Tunji!! You still dey alive?” Angom cried out.

This time he got no response, that meant his friend was dead.

“yeaaaa! Tunji don die oh!!” Angom ran to report the case.



To cut the long story short, Tunji was brought back to life through the “kiss of life”. I wondered the amount of beer the person that kissed must have drank in the process; 10 litres I suppose.

Come to think of it, Tunji must have drank about 50 litres, or so I thought.




“Angom una go dey drink well well for there be that oh” I asked Angom while he narrated.

“yes na! if you see how we dey drink the beer ehn!!”

“how?” I asked.

“e get one tap wey we dey go drink the beer with our hand” He said, “every time wey you On that tap, beer must rush comot, except when them Off am from inside”

What he meant was that you can drink beer from the tap the same way you drink water from a tap when there is no cup available. That is really cool?

“but you no go drink com dey misbehave oh” He warned, “If not, them go just sack you”


Why would I drink to stupor? Two mouthfuls a day was enough for me only from Mondays to Thursdays, while 82 mouthfuls was enough for me on Fridays.











As we left Goldberg hotel; “I wan piss!” I told my friends.

“ehen! piss na!” Junior muttered.

“I say I wan piss!” I repeated.

“piss na, we hold you?” Snow raised his voice.

“make una come help me comot my p’rick na?”

“you dey craze oh, so you no know where your p’rick dey?” Junior said.

“I know na” I replied.

“oya tell us where your p’rick dey?” Snow asked.

“no be here e dey?” I pointed at my shoulder.

“hahahahahahaha!! You be m'umu, no be there your p’rick dey” Snow said, “na here!” He pointed at my Navel.

“una two no get sense oh” Junior cut in “na here him p’rick dey na” He pointed at an entire different place; My Nose.




Blame us not, we drank to “stuporest” if there is any word like that. And madness beckoned.

After much argument, we all went with Snow's idea; that the p’enis was located somewhere above the Navel.

After searching painstakingly above my Navel, I searched downwards and found my p’enis in a forest, so I peed.


As I finished peeing, I tucked the long sleeve shirt in the three quarter short I wore and hurried to catch up with my friends.

Who even told me in the first place to dress so odd; or was it my Christmas clothe?

As I paced to meet up my friends that were rather walking fast…………………………………



“hahahahahahahaha!” I heard behind me.

I turned and saw two ladies laughing uncontrollably. I recognized one of them as Fix something’s sister.

“are you sure he is not mad?” Fixed Something’s sister said.

“na your Papa dey mad”











Within Seconds we were in our compound.

I heard rumbles in my stomach as I added the "The Rock" Padiman offered me making the number of brands I had drank that night six.



I was dead drunk.


In Geography, we were taught that the Earth is Spherical, But that night, I saw the earth Square and humans carried Televisions as heads.

These Televisions ranges in sizes; some where small, some were big, while some others were very big.

Snow’s Television was a typical example of a very big Television. I looked up to see if I could see the size of my own Television but couldn’t, so I concluded mine would be in between very big and very very big. It might as well be bigger than my entire body. Or so I thought.

But again I noticed some Televisions were On while some were Off, some were coloured while some others where black and white.

There is no gainsaying that Junior’s Television was an ancient black and white that was Off.

“Junior wetin happen to your head na?” I asked.

“as how? I no understand” He can never understand that I saw the spiritual.

“e be like say one big wound dey your head” I said.

“you dey craze! Na your head big wound dey” He cursed.



The Television era ended with me seeing the Landlord’s head as a flat screen, while that of Padiman was LED, or was it that those that were “babalawo” carried quality Televisions as heads.



Then came the era of seeing females carrying cakes as a’ss.

The cake of Miracle the Landlord’s daughter looked half baked and somewhat unkept. While that of Joy was white in colour and looked attractive. Oh! How i wished Nnenna was present that night!

Talking of attractive cakes, then came Angela.

Angela’s cake was out of this world; what Nigerians call “National Cake”

Yummy! I wished I could munch a chunk of the National cake.


As I kept staring at the National cake, an indicator suddenly appeared in it.

Below the red indicator was inscribed “come and cut” on blue.

“make I come cut?”


The Devil that told me to stand up was really wicked. But not as wicked as the one that told me to walk towards Angela.

Standing behind Angela, then the most wicked of all Devil told me to cut the cake as directed by the indicator.

I dragged the cake but it was stuck.




What happened to me next, I couldn’t tell. What I could tell was that I saw myself in bed the next morning with a broken jaw.

Snow and Junior narrated to me what happened as I lied in bed sick.

“so na that Angela blow nahim do you this thing? hahahahahaha!” Junior laughed, "Angela go go competition for Female boxing oh! hahahahahahaha!"

“hahahahahaha! But wetin make you go press her n’yash na?” Snow asked.

What nonsense question! “so I go just go press person nyash like that?”

“hahahaha! So wetin come cause wey make you go press am?” He further asked.


I wished they knew why. No! I wished they never knew.











That was how I spent my last Christmas.

tfabu:
This last update was rily funny,i couldn't help the laughter even tho was in a commercial transport,well done flow

Thank you, but laugh easy oh

Baba Flow thumbs up man...... Ur write-up is outta dis world..... But wait oh true true u and snow leg frm RUMUIGBO to GARRISON?? Omoh its nt a small sumtin...... Ur d best man

emmy99:
Baba Flow thumbs up man...... Ur write-up is outta dis world..... But wait oh true true u and snow leg frm RUMUIGBO to GARRISON?? Omoh its nt a small sumtin...... Ur d best man

Yes oh. via shortcut

I think that is the longest distance i have treked.

ugoezeik:
flow tanx gods u r back because my parents bin don de ask me since wia u de I tel dem say maybe u r one of d ppl wey kidnappers catch for agbo delta road. but tanx jar say I don see u for lafia road. maybe wen I get home today I go tel dem say u r tracking for buhari frm bornu to fct

Or so i thought

flow1759:


Thank you
Location road?
Where is that?

Mgbuoba, NTA road.

gregzone:


Mgbuoba, NTA road.

Ok, i know Mgbuoba, that is where Junior lives now.

where in Mgbuoba? I mean the name of the place

Boxing day and we were on our way to Karabari, Haris town, Obuama I think.

“guy this place dey inside oh!” I said, “we never reach?”

As we journeyed through thick forest, what I was asking myself was; “when will Nigeria develop and all this bushes turn House?".




If I was the president of Nigeria, I will build large estates in each state of the federation for citizens to live in at very cheap rates.

If I was the president of Nigeria, I will make sure electricity is supplied worst of 20 hours daily across the federation.

If I was the president of Nigeria, I will make sure 80 percent of youths are gainfully employed………… If I was the president of Nigeria.

If these were the only three keys things I achieve as a president, and I achieve them well, indeed Nigerians will crown me Hero I am sure.








We arrived at about 6pm.

“una welcome oh!!” Harry Snow’s friend walked us to his compound.

As we entered his compound, I suddenly grew goose pimples, so I asked; “river dey near here”

“yes, river dey our backyard” Harry answered.

“Flow you no know say this place wey we dey na riverine area” Snow said, “and na this kin riverine area nahim make them call this state River state?”



If that was the bases of naming a state, Then Imo state shouldn’t have been named Imo, it should have been named “Ngwori” state and the capital would have been Hotel.

Imo!! Oh my dear Imo!!

“Hotel aka nri….. aka ikpa………” Like one igbo Musician sang, Imo state can boast of the highest number of hotels contained in a state amongst the states in the federation.


I will never forget Chima and Chidi telling me they have once lodged in a hotel in Owerri that they paid 1,200 naira per night. They said, they were given candles as they lodged in promising that would be their source of light that night. When mosquitoes finished dealing with them, they wished they never left their home.


I will never also forget Collins when we were in Year one in school. Collins, after painstakingly searching for a Hostel close to school and he didn’t find one, he removed the “s” in the spelling of Hostel and was left with Hotel. He paid the Hotel for one year so he was given a room that was permanently his, and at a very cheap rate too. My dear Collins boasted of how he was a “best friend” to all the a’shawos in the Hotel, and that he needed no girlfriend accepts on mondays that was an off day for all the a’shawos.


Yet I still love my state.

With what I see lately, the current Governor is building Government Houses and Lodges to make matters worse.

Any graduate that goes to a City as Owerri to look for a job, will find one surely, but in a Hotel.

Yet I still love my state.

I know most of you reading will say “who no go like him Mama soup?”. Well, I hated Owerri for one thing, expensive food.

A plate of food goes for 300-400 naira, that na if you no wan chop belleful, but if you wan chop belleful, 500naira. But for us sharp guys, we bought food without meat for 200 naira.

I remember my roommate saying; “God forbid!! I hate meat", that one na because him system don dey use to eating “without”.


Yet I still love my state.


If all states in Nigeria were to be like Imo state, then I assure you all Nigerians would be lazy, very lazy. You work so hard in another state, and you come to Imo state to spend the cash; eateries, night clubs, bars and Hotels will help you do that.

Ngwori was Imo state’s Motto little wonder it is know as Eastern heartland. It is located at the centre of all the Eastern states.


Now don’t be lost, Ngwori means enjoyment; the kind of enjoyment when you are drinking Hennessey and munching “Isi ewu” in one of the rooms at the top floor of Rock view Hotel Owerri with two beautiful IMSU chicks r’omancing your six packs, such kind of enjoyment.


I miss Owerri mehn! Now I just visit the city, and don’t stay long.


But I promise myself I will retire some day in that City, God willing.



















"Guy this one wey you dey ask, hope say you no dey fear water?" Snow said.

Not that I have phobia for rivers, just that such happens whenever I am close to a river, goose pimples.

Call me “Papi Water” if you like, all I will say is that I can not swim, but I can dance in the rain.

Put me in a deep river and I will drown. Put me in a Pond and I will surely drown. Put me in a gutter and verily I will drown, accept if a life jacket was available.



I had promised myself that someday I will learn to swim, little did I know that that day beckoned.





“una go baf abi?” Harry said as we settled.

I really needed a hot bath.


“the water wey we go use baf go dey hot?” I asked.





“the hot water don ready oh” Harry informed us few minutes later.

While I and Snow bathed in the same bathroom, I heard a noise of water tempest towards us; it was like we were floating in water.
I bathed like someone late for work and ran out of the bathroom.







“food don ready oh” Harry’s younger brother brought food.

As I saw Eba, my soul was gladdened, little did I know the soup was native.

Wetin be this?” I almost asked.

What I saw in front of me looked like collective Saliva that palm oil was poured on but with fishes, premature fishes.

“which kin fish be this?” I said, “e no mature well na”

“no oh, naso the fish dey big reach” Harry said, “e no fit big pass this”



I closed my eyes with every swallow so I wouldn’t throw up.

“Snow you get sense abi” I said in my mind, “you dey chop slow-slow so only me go finish the food abi?”


Finishing the food was such a herculean task, so we stopped half way.


“I don belleful” Snow said.

“me sef oh” I said, “Harry thank you oh”.





We discussed a bit about the show that was slated for the next day, not boxing day as Snow told me earlier.




Before light out that night, I said a little prayer remembering what my Mum always told me about people’s village, that if I am killed there, no one would know where I died not to talk of seeing my body.















Thunder struck at about 12am waking me up.




By 12:04am it struck again, and that was when I realized it was not thunder but my stomach that struck.

I pray I emerge the best writer of the month.

I pray there is a "Jega" that will announce me "Buhari".

I also pray there will be no "Orubebe" as they count.



Amen



Still i Flow.

flow1759:


Ok, i know Mgbuoba, that is where Junior lives now.

where in Mgbuoba? I mean the name of the place

122 NTA-Mgbuoba Road, (former police post
after GT Bank at location round-about). Its called Smartdon Academy, owned by Dj smartdon of Wazobia fm ph.

~~Foreign observer dey here with bird's eye view.