I reason with the OP! I think he lives up to his moniker..

I can't rule out beating up my wife, matter of fact I would have no qualms beating her up should she talk or act in a way that warrants it.

I'm not like these other "eager to please" guys who will say they can't touch a woman no matter what (many of which haven't been tested).. Lol fortunately for me, I'm not guided by those same principle, so I make no such declarations or promises.

I will prefer to avoid resorting to any form of physical altercation however, I won't rule it out. I'm from the school of thought which says respect is reciprocal, women should learn to act in a civil & respectful manner & in return you will get respect from your husband without asking.

When you act like a mad woman & words of mouth fail to permeate your head, then my hands will rise to the task & administer some corrective medicine.

Jaw drop

Domestic violence.. The day you ( man or woman) raise your hand to hit your loved one , have it in mind that you're devalued in bits till you're completely Valuless.

Devalued in various absolute instances . Is it really worth it??

This is why exceeding patient is required when you are or have a hot tempered partner . As the matter of fact if you genuinely love someone, you'll have a second thought before hurting them.

Authentic Love does NOT devalue any human being. It shouldn't. Please pick up your overnight bag and LEAVE an irrational partner till the storm is calm.

Of course if the woman is beating the husband he would reply nah.

Theres nothing wrong with the op,i will do the same

lilmax:
Theres nothing wrong with the op,i will do the same

Are you for real right now

Ewuro4:


Are you for real right now

very real

Ewuro4:
Domestic violence.. The day you ( man or woman) raise your hand to hit your loved one , have it in mind that you're devalued in bits till you're completely Valuless.

Lie.
Inasmuch as we don't encourage violence of any form, sometimes some women beg for it with their actions and only become respectful when rendered a very valuable slap.

Devalued in various absolute instances . Is it really worth it??

Depends on the situation. If as a guy the woman has been taking advantage of you since day 1 knowing fully well you would 'never hit her' and she finally pushed you to your limit and even prevents you from leaving the house because 'leaving an argument is childish' then you finally snap...its the woman's fault and its totally worth it.

This is why exceeding patient is required when you are or have a hot tempered partner . As the matter of fact if you genuinely love someone, you'll have a second thought before hurting them.

True.
Most guys don't just start lashing out and beating their guys for no reason. Sure, there are monsters who turn their wives into punching bags for no reason soon after marriage, but I daresay they are in the vast minority. Some women don't know how to talk and keep pushing the limit till the man either becomes their pus.sy-whipped mumu slave or he finally asserts his authority by lashing out. By then the man would have been holding back for so long because he loves her and finally the dam breaks and the floodgates open.

And don't you dare talk about 'Why doesn't he just leave.' If you have ever invested in a long term relationship with children and a future together then you know its not as easy as the 'just leave' party makes it sound.

Authentic Love does NOT devalue any human being. It shouldn't.

True.
So don't devalue your partner by pushing him, by disrespecting him, by being verbally and emotionally abusive all because you know as a lady society will frown on him for beating you.

Please pick up your overnight bag and LEAVE an irrational partner till the storm is calm.

And leave your own house because of a cantankerous woman? Why not pack her bags and send her out till she cools down since she cant rein her tongue in long enough to have a decent conversation?

The last thread I opened about abuse the man walked out of the house and someone called him immature that he left the wife alone for the devil to bring thoughts into her mind. So if he leaves he is at fault. If he stays he is at fault. Haba.

Any man that beats his wife for no reason whatsoever should be locked up and the keys thrown away. However women have to learn that their tongues when used incorrectly sting worse than a scorpion's. They should control themselves so their husbands won't have to leave the house for them during an argument or worse hit out at them. Fair is fair.

kilokeys:
i imagine a scenario where she overpowers u.. beats u to pulp, dislocates ur knee with pestle remove two teeth with frying pan..

u would still never admit ur wife beat u, would u?


u go form accident

hahahah I swear...make the wife lock door beat am well before neighbors come intervene...when they open the door na different story them go see

5minsmadness, I don't have much to say But I'm glad you understand what constitutes a Devalued individual in the society and how it could brutally affect and ruin your relationship with Friends, At church, and mostly your livelihood -Your Career. ( I understand people get away with it back home but here you're done)

The question remain; Are you willing to risk all that just to proof a useless point (Retaliate an assault), is it really worth it??

5minsmadness:

Lie.
Inasmuch as we don't encourage violence of any form, sometimes some women beg for it with their actions and only become respectful when rendered a very valuable slap.



Depends on the situation. If as a guy the woman has been taking advantage of you since day 1 knowing fully well you would 'never hit her' and she finally pushed you to your limit and even prevents you from leaving the house because 'leaving an argument is childish' then you finally snap...its the woman's fault and its totally worth it.


True.
Most guys don't just start lashing out and beating their guys for no reason. Sure, there are monsters who turn their wives into punching bags for no reason soon after marriage, but I daresay they are in the vast minority. Some women don't know how to talk and keep pushing the limit till the man either becomes their pus.sy-whipped mumu slave or he finally asserts his authority by lashing out. By then the man would have been holding back for so long because he loves her and finally the dam breaks and the floodgates open.

And don't you dare talk about 'Why doesn't he just leave.' If you have ever invested in a long term relationship with children and a future together then you know its not as easy as the 'just leave' party makes it sound.



True.
So don't devalue your partner by pushing him, by disrespecting him, by being verbally and emotionally abusive all because you know as a lady society will frown on him for beating you.


And leave your own house because of a cantankerous woman? Why not pack her bags and send her out till she cools down since she cant rein her tongue in long enough to have a decent conversation?

The last thread I opened about abuse the man walked out of the house and someone called him immature that he left the wife alone for the devil to bring thoughts into her mind. So if he leaves he is at fault. If he stays he is at fault. Haba.

Any man that beats his wife for no reason whatsoever should be locked up and the keys thrown away. However women have to learn that their tongues when used incorrectly sting worse than a scorpion's. They should control themselves so their husbands won't have to leave the house for them during an argument or worse hit out at them. Fair is fair.

Any man who marries such a woman should ask himself what is wrong with him in the first place.

The option of violence in a marriage / relationship should not even be open for debate.

rationalmind:


I'm wondering what makes you feel I'm not yet married

its the unmarried ones that always come form baddest boy on NL at 33yrs when they hit 40yrs old they will be trying to PM every babe on NL looking for a wife and babymaker because he knows that anyday his old, tired can just drop dead without a child or someone to share his last moments with

rationalmind:
I saw this thread (https://www.nairaland.com/457400/why-husbands-beat-wives) earlier and noticed how ladies claim it's unacceptable for a man to beat a woman under any circumstance.

How about a scenario where the wife raises her hands to beat the husband? Yes, I'll beat that devil out of my wife if and only if she ever raises her hand to beat me first.

The law allows self defense.


So yes, if your wife beats you, you the law is on your side if you hit back to ward of any danger to you.
However the force has to be reasonable and in proportion.
Which means not - beating the devil out of her.

A real gentleman will walk away from the attack.

However if the woman is violent and uses her domestic weapons, you can`t blame the man for having to defend himself.

Lol.
my papa no do am?
NO be him head calm down like cold water so.
Any man that tries to beat me up must also be ready for ANYTHING.
As for women that have panel beaters as husband, pray to have kids with the character of your husband . At least one, it does wonders! !!My elder broda was calm like Mom.Nm.Na so so diplomatic talk be him own.Mown . Mtchewwww. Things dey spoil him dey speak English Diokpala gini? Tua! !!!! .Doesn't work for me.Let the pain go round.Makw we just scatter the house na him be my own.I have endured enuf. The psychological effect registered in my head was driving me nuts.I dey enter motor 5pm from Benin dey enter Lagos if I hear Bull shit.





My papa think say him stubborn.He born pesin wey pass am.He born three MALUS.If you are above 16 and your papa still dey beat your mama, SHAME TO YOU!

I want to organise a free KUNGFU training for all d ladies on this thread...........If ur husby try nounsense wt u.You go juz use Vandam style remove his front teeth ni. Or if u discover his doin anoda lady outside (away match) u go use Jackie Chan trick hang d guy upside down wt his balls.Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Ladies hw interesting dat wud be? KUNGFU saving lives since time inmemorial

Ewuro4:
5minsmadness, I don't have much to say But I'm glad you understand what constitutes a Devalued individual in the society and how it could brutally affect and ruin your relationship with Friends, At church, and mostly your livelihood -Your Career. ( I understand people get away with it back home but here you're done)

The question remain; Are you willing to risk all that just to proof a useless point (Retaliate an assault), is it really worth it??

My viewpoint about western culture has always been that of a place bordering on total anarchy. Forget that they seem to be the greener grass now but is thier society and way of life especially concerning morals something to be emulated? Maybe that's a discussion for another thread.

If I happen to get married in the US,UK wherever, of course I'll take thier laws into consideration. I'll leave before I end up being frustrated enough to murdering the woman like many others have done before me. Its just heartbreaking for the kids who have to grow up in a dysfunctional home. And all that stats about kids from separated homes growing up well-adjusted is total bullsh1t.

kestolove95:
If my wife. Raise ha hands. On me...I will just leav d house and come back at nyt...by den d devil go don leav her..may. God not let me raise on on ma wife

. Come bk @ 9t kwa? Abi come bk in a week time. #vegatalks#

Moana:
its the unmarried ones that always come form baddest boy on NL at 33yrs when they hit 40yrs old they will be trying to PM every babe on NL looking for a wife and babymaker because he knows that anyday his old, tired can just drop dead without a child or someone to share his last moments with

are you insinuating that men are desperate for marriage more than women? Stop decieving yourself!! If any man sent you a pm or promises marriage,he's only trying to take advantage of the fact that women are easily decieved with marriage talks to get you laid.you think men are really that desperate about commitments? Pfft! What they want is your p.uss.sy and after that,you'll start opening threads to complain that you were used and dumped.

Even at 40 or 50,a man, whether a widow or divorcee can still marry a young and beautiful girl of his choice.so, that marriage thing no dey worry men.the only thing that worries men is how to make a good money.as for women,we can get them any time.but you cannot say the same for women,once you are above 30,problem don start and desperation will set in.she'll start making mistakes and falling for the wrong people.if she reach 40,smh case closed.just don't make mockery of men when it comes to marriage issue because we have it under control.we marries when we wishes but you cannot marry when you wish,except when a man proposes.

chibic:
are you insinuating that men are desperate for marriage more than women? Stop decieving yourself!! If any man sent you a pm or promises marriage,he's only trying to take advantage of the fact that women are easily decieved with marriage talks to get you laid.you think men are really that desperate about commitments? Pfft! What they want is your p.uss.sy and after that,you'll start opening threads to complain that you were used and dumped.

Even at 40 or 50,a man, whether a widow or divorcee can still marry a young and beautiful girl of his choice.so, that marriage thing no dey worry men.the only thing that worries men is how to make a good money.as for women,we can get them any time.but you cannot say the same for women,once you are above 30,problem don start and desperation will set in.she'll start making mistakes and falling for the wrong people.if she reach 40,smh case closed.just don't make mockery of men when it comes to marriage issue because we have it under control.we marries when we wishes but you cannot marry when you wish,except when a man proposes.

but truth remains in your 40s you will still be desparate and the fact you can get a young beautiful wife, doesnt guarantee that she will be a good one. 90% of the time where a young girl marries and old tired men,will be because she will be hoping that he drops dead of diabetes or something before she clocks 35...

And yeah when you cannot perform in bed she can just use your money to get herself a strong young bobo to service her well at any given time. At the end of it, your hard earned money will paying one boy for going down on your wife on a regular basis, while all you will be able to manage is 15secs of bad sex.

So yes men do get desparate at 40 because he will just marry whatever accepts his proposal not a woman who is actually willing to marry him because she loves him.

By the time your kids become teenagers they will be to ashamed to identify their father fear of being mocked and laughed at by their agemates. Strangers will be complementing your daughter referring to her as your grandchild. Stop petting yourself with all manner of lovely nonsense because life isn't as rosy for you as you try to put it on a faceless public forum.

Moana:


but truth remains in your 40s you will still be desparate and the fact you can get a young beautiful wife, doesnt guarantee that she will be a good one. 90% of the time where a young girl marries and old tired men, is that she will be hoping that he drops dead of diabetes or something before she clocks 35...

And yeah when you cannot perform in bed she can just use your money to get herself a strong young bobo to service her well at any given time. At the end of it, your hard earned money will paying one boy for going down on your wife on a regular basis, while all you will be able to manage is 15secs of bad sex.

So yes men do get desparate at 40 because he will just marry whatever accepts his proposal not a woman who is actually willing to marry him because she loves him.

By the time your kids become teenagers they will be to ashamed to identify their father fear of being mocked and laughed at by their agemates. Strangers will be complementing your daughter referring to her as your grandchild. Stop petting yourself with all manner of lovely nonsense because live isn't as rosy for you as you try to put it on a faceless public forum.

Lmao...are you sure you're still in tune with reality?

crackhaus:

Lmao...are you sure you're still in tune with reality?

thats pretty much the truth, if you know of any young girl who married a man at least 20yrs old than her, let her confide in you and you will know that its all about the money, they always get the good sex elsewhere.

Moana:
thats pretty much the truth, if you know of any young girl who married a man at least 20yrs old than her, let her confide in you and you will know that its all about the money, they always get the good sex elsewhere.

Good thing you're a female saying this - if I or any other man had said this, I'm sure you know how it would hurt the fragile feelings of some of you ladies.

That aside, I actually called you out on your opinion that a man at 40 is desperate to get married, this is not true especially when he has money.

crackhaus:

Good thing you're a female saying this - if I or any other man had said this, I'm sure you know how it would hurt the fragile feelings of some of you ladies.

That aside, I actually called you out on your opinion that a man at 40 is desperate to get married, this is not true especially when he has money.

okay, how many yankee or london boys that you know who end asking people at home to look for a wife for them to marry or they come back and marry one random lady after one month of meeting her face to face and over a year of chatting via social networks? If thats not desparation, i dont know what else is

katzz:
Under no circumstance should u hit ur wife.....u dont deliberately hurt people u love. shes not a child, adults talk things through. A man should protect and take care of his wifey not treat her like a punching bag

Even when she insults the women who gave birth to you and sent you through school?

There are certain circumstances that call for a little quick rehab

Moana:
okay, how many yankee or london boys that you know who end asking people at home to look for a wife for them to marry or they come back and marry one random lady after one month of meeting her face to face and over a year of chatting via social networks? If thats not desparation, i dont know what else is

Now that you bring social demographics into it, I quite understand where you're coming from.
And yes I personally know at least five dudes who have gone this route, and a lot more from stories.

But while you call these guys desperate, I prefer to term them auspicious.
It's not like they can't get women in their locality, they just prefer having traditionally home-bred women...at least that's what they think/expect of such women.
It's the women who marry them that are desperate to run away from poverty or a less-than-average quality of life.

macof:


Even when she insults the women who gave birth to you and sent you through school?

There are certain circumstances that call for a little quick rehab

well u should pick your life partner well to avoid drama...yes its unacceptable for your wife to speak about your mom like that but do you wanna live your entire life beating her up to discipline her? and there must be a reason why she would do that just saying. Some mother in laws are impossible though it doesnt justify such talk

You dont demand respect....its earned! and u gonna get married choose her well

crackhaus:

Now that you bring social demographics into it, I quite understand where you're coming from.
And yes I personally know at least five dudes who have gone this route, and a lot more from stories.

But while you call these guys desperate, I prefer to term them auspicious.
It's not like they can't get women in their locality, they just prefer having traditionally home-bred women...at least that's what they think/expect of such women.
It's the women who marry them that are desperate to run away from poverty or a less-than-average quality of life.

put it in any delicate way you want, desparation is desperation. You can give all fancy excuses you can make up but at the end of the day we all know desparation is what leads men to do such.

Moana:
put it i any delicate way want, desparation is desparation. You can give all fancy excuses you can make up but at the end of the day we all desparation is what leads men to do such.

Lol... okay Moana

5minsmadness:

My viewpoint about western culture has always been that of a place bordering on total anarchy. Forget that they seem to be the greener grass now but is thier society and way of life especially concerning morals something to be emulated? Maybe that's a discussion for another thread.

If I happen to get married in the US,UK wherever, of course I'll take thier laws into consideration. I'll leave before I end up being frustrated enough to murdering the woman like many others have done before me. Its just heartbreaking for the kids who have to grow up in a dysfunctional home. And all that stats about kids from separated homes growing up well-adjusted is total bullsh1t.

Most Nigerian menfolk share your sentiments about western culture so I'm not surprised , we should treat other people with respect EOD regardless of what and how the fracas transpired.

The reason Yall should shine your eyes when choosing a partner and look beyond external beauty. A virtuous woman seeks peace within her family, she's not stûpid or mumu, she's just meek to reign peace.

That said, the general perception(society) of a man whose first impulse to defence is to land his frustrated wife a hot slap is low- Devalued.

Have a good day.

ProfGday:
I want to organise a free KUNGFU training for all d ladies on this thread...........If ur husby try nounsense wt u.You go juz use Vandam style remove his front teeth ni. Or if u discover his doin anoda lady outside (away match) u go use Jackie Chan trick hang d guy upside down wt his balls.Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Ladies hw interesting dat wud be? KUNGFU saving lives since time inmemorial

Much needed training i tell you something.

ProfGday:
I want to organise a free KUNGFU training for all d ladies on this thread...........If ur husby try nounsense wt u.You go juz use Vandam style remove his front teeth ni. Or if u discover his doin anoda lady outside (away match) u go use Jackie Chan trick hang d guy upside down wt his balls.Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Ladies hw interesting dat wud be? KUNGFU saving lives since time inmemorial

This isn't for me.
One single slap and we will go our separate ways.
I have zero tolerance for violence. I don't hit people and I don't want anybody to hit me.
What kind of relationship / marriage is that in which people beat each other? What kind of a home? I would be ashamed.

I cannot respect anyone who resorts to violence.

I pity those wo/men who have to endure domestic violence for one reason or another.