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5 Reasons Why Being Selfish Is Good For Your Marriage - Family - Nairaland

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5 Reasons Why Being Selfish Is Good For Your Marriage by Fineboi2(m): 7:17am On Mar 08, 2015
Marriage is considered to be a bond that is blessed by the Almighty Himself. From a married couple, it demands commitment and selfless giving. However, in these changing times, the idea of being only a giver in a marriage is not acceptable to either of the sexes.
Marriage has become more about striking a balance between thinking about yourself and taking care of the needs of your partner. Here we bring to you some reasons that explain, why being selfish sometimes, is actually healthy for your relationship.


#1. Makes you happier
The virtual world of movies, television and social media, portrays marriage as ‘happily everafter’. We believe that our special someone is waiting out there for us, with the key to unlock our happiness. But, in reality, it does not work that way. We hold the key to our own happiness, and being selfish helps us to see the truth.

Sometimes, you centre your life entirely around your other half. You may think that your sacrifices for your partner will make your spouse very happy. But, in the long run, this might make your relationship suffer. Your partner might start taking you for granted for all the compromises you make, which can create a sense of discontentment in you. Think about yourself too. A ‘happy you’ will also maintain a pleasant atmosphere. Additionally, you both will not feel suffocated in the relationship.

#2. Less fights in the relationship
Continued spells of petty domestic fights can ruin any happy and healthy relationship. The root cause for most of these skirmishes is too much dependency of one partner on the other. The more dependent one is on the other, that partner will more likely feel let down.

On the other hand, selfishness brings peace and calm. If both of you take care of your own selves, chances are, you will have less fights. So, selfishness is not actually ignoring your partner, instead it is about being more concerned about your own flaws and working on them.

#3. You acknowledge each other

When you start taking care of yourself, you tend to demand less from your partner and acknowledge every small little thing that he/she does for you. Expectations are less, and that is not necessarily a bad thing. Once you are already happy with yourself, you do not look up to your partner to boost your ego.

#4. Strengthens your bond emotionally

If you constantly demand time and attention from your partner, it can create tension in your relationship. However, when you spend a good amount of time with yourself, it gives space in the relationship to your partner as well. As a result, your partner also wants to spend more time with you. This way, the love between you becomes unconditional, and your relationship becomes stronger than ever.

#5. Increases intimacy

While making love, if you put your happiness over the contentment of your partner, s*x becomes more liberating. You do not have to be just lovey-dovey and please your partner all the time. Be honest about your needs and tell your partner what you expect, and see how exciting your sessions in the sack will become.
Recommended Read: Top 8 Mistakes Married Women Make In Bed
A little bit of selfishness in your marriage can give you your own personal space while getting rid of fatigue in a relationship. Just keeping a little distance can spice things up, keep the romance alive, and the flame of passion burning constantly. So, follow these simple tips and enjoy your married life, always!
Re: 5 Reasons Why Being Selfish Is Good For Your Marriage by lordizak(m): 7:20am On Mar 08, 2015
after all said and done, more is said than done.
Re: 5 Reasons Why Being Selfish Is Good For Your Marriage by VickJames(m): 8:14am On Mar 08, 2015
Bad Advice from an inexperienced man!

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Re: 5 Reasons Why Being Selfish Is Good For Your Marriage by Nobody: 8:17am On Mar 08, 2015
Okay
Re: 5 Reasons Why Being Selfish Is Good For Your Marriage by crackhaus: 9:08am On Mar 08, 2015
Everyone has or will at some point do things that can be classified as selfish in the true sense of the word even if they won't admit to it - selfishness has no special locus on marriage or being a recipe for finding 'good' in it, it's just life - unless you as a person have never once put your own satisfaction and happiness ahead of someone else's.

All that nonsense about 1+1=1 in marriage is just terrible mathematics, 1+1 is still 2 and people will still have things they need to do for themselves to be happy regardless of how selfish it may seem.

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