I just got off the phone with a cousin. This guy currently lives abroad. About 7 years ago he met and proposed marriage to 'the love of his life', a young promising graduate. despite the fact that his parents vehemently refused his marriage to this girl on the basis that they really didnt know her or her family he went ahead and did a secret court marriage so he and his 'true love' could be together. Two months later she was pregnant and the parents had no choice but to agree to a traditional marriage. He then went ahead to take her abroad and provide her with a foreign degree and a decent job.
All of a sudden she changed. She started asking him why she should contribute to the upkeep of the house, why she shouldn't be allowed to stay out late, what right did he have to stop her from wearing the kind of clothes she wanted amongst other things. He found himself picking his words carefully whenever he talked to her so as to be misconstrued as being rude. To cut a long story short they broke up a few weeks ago and the kids have been sent back to naija to live with the grandparents while both have gone their separate ways.

What baffles me is that i interacted with this lady while she was in the country and honestly she didn't seem like the troublemaker type at all. very friendly and polite, generous up to a fault. Between the time they dated and the time they got married before going abroad they were together for four years and during that time we never heard a single complaint. even my cousin attests to the fact that there was no trouble until they left the country.

the painful thing now is that his parents are laughing at him. like they warned him about knowing the girl and her family first but he was forming 'modern man'.

i have found this trait to occur a lot among some other marriages. Why do some ladies behave like this?

Cause of the environment empowers females very well than here.

izzyboy10:
Cause of the environment empowers females very well than here.

Is empowerment equivalent to marriage break-up/divorce?

5minsmadness:

Is empowerment equivalent to marriage break-up/divorce?

when they get there,they try to gallivant since that place is kinda free than here.

Women are mostly like that, even here in nigeria. Though i believe in gender equality but a good woman has it as a duty to always respect her husband, no matter what life might hav changed to

Another thread to bash Nigerian women abroad.

All those women that are dragging their husbands to ejigbo court and igando court for divorce everyday na who?

Or I forgot Lagos na abroad too.

I am sure more people get divorced in Lagos alone than the whole of (abroad where that is) put together in a year.

But you know it is. Leave the forest in your eye and grieve with your neighbor for the speck in his eye.

For every Nigerian marriage that breaks up in Diaspora there are 3 that are working..

As for the question, me I don't know o.I will be the same person that I am regardless of whether I live in Kaduna,Norway or America

Lol. I hope the guy in question is my ex or his likes

He deserves a "tear-eye" lady since he doesn't understand what it means to be truly loved. U cannot take a woman for granted all her life. Nanzenz!

5minsmadness:
I just got off the phone with a cousin. This guy currently lives abroad. About 7 years ago he met and proposed marriage to 'the love of his life', a young promising graduate. despite the fact that his parents vehemently refused his marriage to this girl on the basis that they really didnt know her or her family he went ahead and did a secret court marriage so he and his 'true love' could be together. Two months later she was pregnant and the parents had no choice but to agree to a traditional marriage. He then went ahead to take her abroad and provide her with a foreign degree and a decent job.
All of a sudden she changed. She started asking him why she should contribute to the upkeep of the house, why she shouldn't be allowed to stay out late, what right did he have to stop her from wearing the kind of clothes she wanted amongst other things. He found himself picking his words carefully whenever he talked to her so as to be misconstrued as being rude. To cut a long story short they broke up a few weeks ago and the kids have been sent back to naija to live with the grandparents while both have gone their separate ways.

What baffles me is that i interacted with this lady while she was in the country and honestly she didn't seem like the troublemaker type at all. very friendly and polite, generous up to a fault. Between the time they dated and the time they got married before going abroad they were together for four years and during that time we never heard a single complaint. even my cousin attests to the fact that there was no trouble until they left the country.

the painful thing now is that his parents are laughing at him. like they warned him about knowing the girl and her family first but he was forming 'modern man'.

i have found this trait to occur a lot among some other marriages. Why do some ladies behave like this?

To be able to meet, marry, obtain foreign degree and good job and children old enough to send back home to grandparents all in 7 years is truly amazing.

Please stop making stuff up.

For the same reason why Nigerian men don't change when they go abroad

2CatWoman:



To be able to meet, marry, obtain foreign degree and good job and children old enough to send back home to grandparents all in 7 years is truly amazing.

Please stop making stuff up.

Meet---unknown
Impregnated - - - 2 months later.
Married - - - - - - 1yr later. First child is 3months.
Wife stayed in Nigeria for 4yrs and had second child.
They stayed abroad 3yrs. She got placement to study from here so started immediately when she got there. First child is now 7yrs. Second child is 3yrs plus.

Pray before you marry. Even then, marriage is not beans. You are talking about 2 strangers with different backgrounds and values forcing themselves to be together.

Not even parents can decipher whether or not the marriage will work.

Women want a partner who is understanding and supportive, not every time control.