This isn't my work. A friend shared it with me so I just felt it will be cool to share it here too. Enjoy!
Subject: The Wife



About Wife

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
~By Lee Majors

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
~By Al Gore

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
~By Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things and prevents us from achieving them.
~By Mike Tyson

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
~By George Clooney

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
~By Bill Clinton

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays."
~By George W. Bush

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
~By Rudy Giuliani

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
~By Michael Jordan

"I've had bad luck with all my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.” The third gave me more children!
~By Donald Trump

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
~By Shaquille O’Neal

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
~By Kobe Bryant

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
By David Hasselhoff

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
~By Alec Baldwin

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
~By Barack Obama

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
~ByTommy Lee

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
~By Brad Pitt

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy : "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
~ By Jimmy Kimmel

“Honey, what happened to ‘ladies first’?” Husband replies, “That’s the reason why the world’s a mess today, because a lady went first!”
~By David Letterman

“First there’s the promise ring, then the engagement ring, then the wedding ring...soon after....comes Suffer..ing!
~By Jay Leno

"The reason why wives live longer is beacause they don't have a Wife"
~by Brandon Breezy

FORWARD THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH.....

Stupid creatures.

Re we dat troublesome?

Ladybianca:
Re we dat troublesome?

Not just troublesome,you freaks are the problem of the world..without you the world would've been a serene place to be..But i think God added you just for fuckening sake.

IamOdin:


Not just troublesome,you freaks are the problem of the world..without you the world would've been a serene place to be..But i think God added you just for fuckening sake.

guy na Ur papa carry u for belle for 9months ba or na Ur papa testicles u sucked...females are more important dan us self

sladimeji:
guy na Ur papa carry u for belle for 9months ba or na Ur papa testicles u sucked...females are more important dan us self

if my papa no put am i 4 fly enter her belle abi??.ur brain sef!

And they beta pass u no be me ahbeg!

Ewu awusa.

IamOdin:
Stupid creatures.

To me, the complete the very essence of humanity.

Ladybianca:
Re we dat troublesome?

No ur not. Infact I find ur "species" very fascinating.

Ladybianca:
Re we dat troublesome?

No ur not. Infact I find ur "species" very fascinating...

ShaddyTerese:

To me, the complete the very essence of humanity.

i respect ur opinion.

The husband is no better too!

MrsChima:
The husband is no better too!

would have made more sense if you wrote "my husband is no better"

IamOdin:


would have made more sense if you wrote "my husband is no better"

I said what I wanted to say fool.

MrsChima:


I said what I wanted to say fool.

why is Engllish this hard?
I said "would have made MORE SENSE if"
i can't remember instructing u on what to say or not f00l..i gave MHO.

Women add the spice to the world

Men wud AV left evrytn in a state of uproar if left alone

IamOdin:


why is Engllish this hard?
I said "would have made MORE SENSE if"
i can't remember instructing u on what to say or not f00l..i gave MHO.

Is it hard for you, No where in my quote I said you have instructed me fool!

Mhizizzy:
Women add the spice to the world

Men wud AV left evrytn in a state of uproar if left alone

and you think it's better now with the xenophobic attack at s.a being cos d s.a's aint getting enough fuckening.

Mhizizzy:
Women add the spice to the world

Men wud AV left evrytn in a state of uproar if left alone

Precisely.

MrsChima:


Is it hard for you, No where in my quote I said you have instructed me fool!

cry me a nile cos you just exposed ur husband's frailities...Liability.

Women are God’s most beautiful creatures. I am proud to be a woman.

IamOdin:


cry me a nile cos you just exposed ur husband's frailities...Liability.

Why do Nigerians make up and assume shit? Anyway....I just exposed your faggotry!

MrsChima:


Why do Nigerians make up and assumed shit? Anyeay....I just exposed your faggotry!

Bae,limme.

zealot4me:
Women are God’s most beautiful creatures. I am proud to be a woman.

o girl!."i dey BEX oh,why i keep face like that?.i neva chop?" in Rove with ur pix

IamOdin:


o girl!."i dey BEX oh,why i keep face like that?.i neva chop?" in Rove with ur pix

Lol! Mallam since morning I neba chof
I love d pix too

zealot4me:




Lol! Mallam since morning I neba chof
I love d pix too

i qo chop TUWO?

IamOdin:


i qo chop TUWO?

Yes walahi

zealot4me:



Yes walahi

ok i will give u but on one condition..



Don't come for it another day..geddit??

IamOdin:


ok i will give u but on one condition..



Don't come for it another day..geddit??

zealot4me:

ah don teyyu oh

IamOdin:


ah don teyyu oh

lol ohkay! Odin is ya name ?

zealot4me:



lol ohkay! Odin is ya name ?

Bae.