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How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by lezz(m): 6:25pm On May 05, 2015
nairalife2013:
The kind of woman I married are few. She hung at d door and cried and told me she was so sorry abt what she did. I was crying inside as she spoke amidst sobs. My heart bled. But I had to do it. I was abt to hand my life to some1. I needed the best. I did dat to two other ladies who coursed me and left my life for good. But this one wept and told me she so much loved me her life could crash or end by heartache if she left, and she confirmed she couldn't live a day without me. I would hav deciphered if she was feigning remorse. It wouldn't take me long. I am who I am.
I opened the door and brought her in. Till today she is not aware I faked that angst. I loved her more. I was loaded widout her knowledge. I got her her first car, a saloon as I proposed to her. She was just entering sch. We got married. She took in. At delivery of our first child, I got her a suv. We were young and full of life. I was living my life just to give her joy and all necessities of life. I loved her beyond words. When she took in for our second child, the conception was at a time a terrible moodswing hit my wife. I thot she had changed. She would pick up argument s with me and make faces a whole week just for no just cause. She quarreled wid my younger sisters at any slight provocation and sat all day in an unkempt home watching her regular, favourite fbi action movies. I was mesmerized. Little thins piss me up. But I endured this one. I was afraid somthing was wrong. After delivery of our second child, abt a year later, Like some1 that woke up from a nightmare, My wife came to me and complained she involuntarily wakes every morning with bouts of indescribable anger flourishing in her heart. Since that day I knew it was my turn by providence to show love and tolerance and understanding. I did. My wife went thro those tormentous days without knowing the reason why she was so angrily depressed. One day, She went consciously to my sisters and apologized. Spent more time with them and amended all errors. It's some years now and all those trying times are over, leaving behind funny reminisces only a good heart could understand. When a lady is good, she is good. Your own goodness tho might be regarded as weakness or greed by an incompatible third party. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I do not regret my actions. Those ladies whose level of tolerance where below my recomended average had departed in good fate. I wished them luck and enduring love. My wife is now working and her welfare package, large as it is, is in my control on her insistence, with total abandon! She is selfless to a fault and prefares a one-lady lifestyle, upon the trappings of life chance and time have bestowed on her at her young age.
... My wife told me once: I see u not only as my husband but also as my father; reprimanding me in any way, as a father would her daughter, is lovingly accepted by me cause I trust yur sense of judgment and our kids would obey u for good if I myself obey u and succumb with respect; I love u to that point."
... There are many eager males and plenty of willing females in the world. If u stumble on yur right choice, love can let u into limitless tolerance. Many ladies are possesd by the destructive spirit of subconscious pride and seemingly suppressed self ego. The last creatures to know they need help allround. The few that are free hardly preach to their kind, The Message. Instead they vent the opposit of the message.
Dont do like me. I personally do not tally well long enoff with ladies who do not have the habit of accepting defeat wether they are right or wrong. Those type are good for one nite stand levels not for running a home. Pls find a way to be patient. If she is inherently a-self-worth-type of lady, u need to work harder on tolerance and never let yur praying knees get lazy. Goodluck.
Wisdom and intelligence is what you possess. God bless you for this naration.

you aren't just a good husband but you are a leader too. and your wife.....what a lady of character,rich heritage and wisdom.

wish you guys the best. what you have is rare.

4 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by bennyrazz: 6:33pm On May 05, 2015
cococandy:




Yay way to go. Nice example for other guys and bennyrazz to follow
its a man's world so get use to it grin tongue

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by cococandy(f): 6:34pm On May 05, 2015
Ralphlauren:


I'm shocked too at the number of people commending the psycho.
but they will kill a man who treats their daughter like that.

Hypocrisy

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by cococandy(f): 6:34pm On May 05, 2015
bennyrazz:
its a man's world so get use to it grin tongue
good for you
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by sped1oro(m): 6:49pm On May 05, 2015
JEGA needs to come around and shed more light on this National issue,i believed in his sense of judgement.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by summerflame(m): 7:11pm On May 05, 2015
I am a bachelor, so I won't know how to contribute but I am learning. Seriously, because of this women's shit is why I am still single at 33. To me, most women but not all are frustrating and devilish

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by dejonathan(f): 7:18pm On May 05, 2015
oweniwe:
How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife?












Through her Vagiena lipsrsealed
....fool
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by summerflame(m): 7:26pm On May 05, 2015
What is this one saying?. Did u forget your brain at work?
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Ihuomadinihu: 7:30pm On May 05, 2015
nairalife2013:
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm
Are you a man or a demon?

4 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by NobleG1(m): 7:32pm On May 05, 2015
netsurf:
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean very stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...doesn't respect the man's opinion about anything...

On the few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband airs his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exaggeration...this is how exactly she behaves.

Please note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the wedding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.

Please anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?

I picked up that word "ORDER" from your writeup. You may want to look in the mirror because the person you'll see there may be the problem.

You can't order your wife around. She's your wife and partner NOT your slave or housegirl! Your mentality is the same with most Nigerian men who see their wives as maids or second-class humans. Respect is reciprocal.

For the fact that she consults google on any subject of discussion with you means you've been very wrong many times and failed to admit it. Google is a very important source of any info. about anything that exists today.

So don't attack her for trying to be well informed. I'll advice you to google stuff more to avoid embarrasing yourself in the midst of educàted people. Don't let your pride to get in the way and be open-minded because you have a smart wife. Trust me, you don't want a wife who agrees with you on everything, even when you damn wrong.

7 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Bolosiye: 7:32pm On May 05, 2015
netsurf:
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean very stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...doesn't respect the man's opinion about anything...

On the few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband airs his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exaggeration...this is how exactly she behaves.

Please note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the wedding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.

Please anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?
abeg make na talk o i wan kw
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by themodernman: 7:36pm On May 05, 2015
netsurf:


Okay, for instance, when the baby came, she breast feeded him exclusively for six months and then the stage to introduce some food came..the baby wouldn't accept those frisogold, cerelac etc but accepts Ogi well but she continually force him to take those friso/cerel and each time, the baby cries endlesslly and later vomits everything. Then at about 10 months old, the baby would accept amala, and indomie on his own without been forced...then she brought in golden morn which the baby spits out the moment it touches his mouth...despite this, she started forcing him again...so the husband said don't give it to him any more...give what he is okay with. Rather than explain why she want to continue forcing him, she went and bought a bigger bag of the golden morn...then the husband threw it away...this happenned last Thursday and since then she has stopped greeting her husband and even prepare food when she like since then.

I thank my God for blessing me with a discerning mind...no way a woman can pretend for me during relationship & courtship...I'll definitely catch her...there are signs to look out for which d OP doesn't know of...

Tell a woman not to force feed her child she'll think the worst of you. That's what made me not to have body till today oh....cos my mama go just dey beat me if I no chop so I saw food as punishment. Now wey I don grow up, nobody they force me to chop.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by babygirlfl: 7:38pm On May 05, 2015
NobleG1:


I picked up that word "ORDER" from your writeup. You may want to look in the mirror because the person you'll see there may be the problem.

You can't order your wife around. She's your wife and partner NOT your slave or housegirl! Your mentality is the same with most Nigerian men who see their wives as maids or second-class humans. Respect is reciprocal.

For the fact that she consults google on any subject of discussion with you means you've been very wrong many times and failed to admit it. Google is a very important source of any info. about any that exists today.

So don't attack her for trying to be well informed. I'll advice you to google stuff more to avoid embarrasing yourself in the midst of educaàted people. And be open-minded because you have a smart wife. Trust me, you don't want a wife who agrees with you on everything, even when you damn wrong.



Well said. There is still hope.

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Ihuomadinihu: 7:38pm On May 05, 2015
Rockstar2014:
Sincerely, this type of stories scare the hell out of me because my fiancee I intend to settle down with is so stubborn and temperamental and this attitude of hers has been so difficult for me to handle, even though she is caring and loving and I do love her so so much, but I fear she may turn worse when we finally get married.
It's good you detected her weekness on time,right before marriage. There are so many girls that fake their personalities till they achieve what they want. As it stands,you are the only one that can decide whether you can accomodate her excesses or not.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Nobody: 7:47pm On May 05, 2015
NobleG1:


I picked up that word "ORDER" from your writeup. You may want to look in the mirror because the person you'll see there may be the problem.

You can't order your wife around. She's your wife and partner NOT your slave or housegirl! Your mentality is the same with most Nigerian men who see their wives as maids or second-class humans. Respect is reciprocal.

For the fact that she consults google on any subject of discussion with you means you've been very wrong many times and failed to admit it. Google is a very important source of any info. about any that exists today.

So don't attack her for trying to be well informed. I'll advice you to google stuff more to avoid embarrasing yourself in the midst of educàted people. Don't let your pride to get in the way and be open-minded because you have a smart wife. Trust me, you don't want a wife who agrees with you on everything, even when you damn wrong.



Chai. You mean to say that OP no sabi book?

How dare you.! A whole head of the house. grin

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Ihuomadinihu: 7:51pm On May 05, 2015
marquiseT:


its nice that "beat her black and blue, if she does not leave" she is a wife material worked for you but let the people who are inspired by you know it is not the litmus test for a wife material, and you should know that those that left you have valid reasons to, according to you-you kept other ladies, nagged, got angry over little issues and to sum it up, you battered and locked some out in the rain. Its obvious you wanted "whatever our daddy says" kind of woman not some one with good self worth. You have told us how happy you are and how much money you have showered on her but we dont know how happy she is or if her opinion matters, if her voice is heard , if she is part of the decision making process, if she always has to accept defeat in every argument, if you still beat her? Congrats, you got a good wife
but if the remaining men on earth are like you i will rather remain single...
It's not difficult to detect a misorgynist. I blame the women that will foolishly go for that kind of man. There are only two kinds of women that will tolerate this shit, 1.She is after something and will leave when she finds it.
2. She is a dumb,insecure creature.
The former set is dangerous cos she will murder/poison the man once she is tired. Most women that kill their husbands started plotting the plan a long time ago.
Don't even understand why people celebrate nonesense on nairaland. Only a real man knows how to control a woman without violence and maltreatment.

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by amacastel: 8:06pm On May 05, 2015
babygirlfl:


Hilarious. What if she just signs the divorce document and move on.

Dis option is for people that are ready for d inevitable besides wots d essence of marriage of no respect for each other and mutual understanding . So if she sign then so be there is no crime in having peace of mind
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by tchiwinnie: 8:25pm On May 05, 2015
bukatyne:


But the same Bible never prescribed divorce for stubbornness.
Of course not! Just saying its nt strange. Its nt a light matter so to speak.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Phinagold(f): 8:35pm On May 05, 2015
The best way to handle a stubborn wife is never to have one. That post is too long, cant read it
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by cococandy(f): 8:37pm On May 05, 2015
OP read this comment again and again and again
NobleG1:


I picked up that word "ORDER" from your writeup. You may want to look in the mirror because the person you'll see there may be the problem.

You can't order your wife around. She's your wife and partner NOT your slave or housegirl! Your mentality is the same with most Nigerian men who see their wives as maids or second-class humans. Respect is reciprocal.

For the fact that she consults google on any subject of discussion with you means you've been very wrong many times and failed to admit it. Google is a very important source of any info. about anything that exists today.

So don't attack her for trying to be well informed. I'll advice you to google stuff more to avoid embarrasing yourself in the midst of educàted people. Don't let your pride to get in the way and be open-minded because you have a smart wife. Trust me, you don't want a wife who agrees with you on everything, even when you damn wrong.


3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by oweniwe(m): 8:43pm On May 05, 2015
dejonathan:
....fool
jonadunce.....
wetin concen u with my comment?
can't u just read and pass?
smiley

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by masties2(f): 9:03pm On May 05, 2015
There are two things involved.
1. The hubby doesnot help out at home. Hence he treats her like a glorified slave.
2. The hubby showered her with too much love during courtship.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by spiralwedge(m): 9:13pm On May 05, 2015
bukatyne:


I can sense power play here

Some kids certainly like to be ajepako and Some ajebutter Lol! and as the husband pointed out, she should have fed him with What he was comfortable with aslong as it was healthy.

Besides, There seems to be a lot of communication issues. What changed the wife from a sweet fiancee to the stubborn wife?

And also, There is nothing wrong with consulting with Google. You tend to get a lot of expert advice (If you can sift) online.

I had to stop here to comment.
your comments are annoying. u seemed not to understand what the op was driving at or maybe u are unmarried and inexperienced,.. I don't know.
u sound immature and stubborn

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by blakky97(m): 9:19pm On May 05, 2015
nairalife2013:
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm
exactly what I fear most about girls I just trust none. I no fit for wahala. I kinda hatte them even. I never really liked a lady enough to consider getting married. maybe there are modern ways out. contract marriage. just to have a kid whose not a baastad.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by blakky97(m): 9:25pm On May 05, 2015
netsurf:


Okay, for instance, when the baby came, she breast feeded him exclusively for six months and then the stage to introduce some food came..the baby wouldn't accept those frisogold, cerelac etc but accepts Ogi well but she continually force him to take those friso/cerel and each time, the baby cries endlesslly and later vomits everything. Then at about 10 months old, the baby would accept amala, and indomie on his own without been forced...then she brought in golden morn which the baby spits out the moment it touches his mouth...despite this, she started forcing him again...so the husband said don't give it to him any more...give what he is okay with. Rather than explain why she want to continue forcing him, she went and bought a bigger bag of the golden morn...then the husband threw it away...this happenned last Thursday and since then she has stopped greeting her husband and even prepare food when she like since then.
shes a witch. many of these ladies actually are.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by blakky97(m): 9:28pm On May 05, 2015
bukatyne:


I can sense power play here

Some kids certainly like to be ajepako and Some ajebutter Lol! and as the husband pointed out, she should have fed him with What he was comfortable with aslong as it was healthy.

Besides, There seems to be a lot of communication issues. What changed the wife from a sweet fiancee to the stubborn wife?

And also, There is nothing wrong with consulting with Google. You tend to get a lot of expert advice (If you can sift) online.
this is one of them.

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by blakky97(m): 9:32pm On May 05, 2015
LasoulMacuby:
A slap can reset the brain to factory mode, never underestimate what a hard slap can do to a woman's face
#myopinion.
I'll make use of force. if shes tired let her leave. she get her freedom, I get my peace.
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Ewuro4: 9:35pm On May 05, 2015
It boggles mind what I see on this thread. If many posters agreed with Nairalife's post then we have a very big problem with our young lads.

Sad sad sad

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by onoja12: 9:39pm On May 05, 2015
define real men and fake men for me,also define real women and fake once for me,the majority of men really didn't want to go into marriage go and ask married men,they would tell you.and for the record in this present day good women are like 5% of the population,as for true love that is a ferry tale the white man brought for you,ask yourself your fathers and mother and the once before them where they looking for true love as you call am or good partners?once you get the answer you would know why it is difficult in this modern days to find good women.
finally anybody that just meet you and tells you he or she is in love with you that is scam,love is a process in continuity ,so you grow into it and the real time you can totally declare it,is on your dying bed


mamaope:
O. Not all men, Real men want so much more than just sex, believe me I know. And if you are fortunate to find yourself a good woman that truly love you and you are good to her you will know marriage is one of the best thing that can happen in people's lives. It will always come with it challenges cause you two were raised differently, but everything will eventually workout.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by nairalife2013(m): 9:59pm On May 05, 2015
Ihuomadinihu:

Are you a man or a demon?
I took on the rough skin of a demon when I was single and in search of a True companion. Am a man now. Am home to peace presently. I killed my heart back way then, to keep it alive, like a seedling buried in the soil to die then grow. Chose yur path. I av chosen mind. I knew what I wanted. I always know what I want and how to painstakingly get to it. We all hav our ways, no matter how easy or hard we device them. Most men have the route to the shortcut in their brains and just walk down straight to it. Most dont. They discover thier own shortcut by long wandering, or die trying. Men are the last creatures that will ever grow up. To survive a tumultuous world of marriage and endless misunderstanding inherent in the day to day union with a stranger, he needs a partner that loves him like his own mother. Only calm feminine minds will ever understand this. Narrow and zigzag, Paths of the Outwardly Virtous maid with Rebel's innards, the cool dude sees it from afar and avoid it without a fuse...the collected man doesn't look when others are looking. He knows when to steal a glance and grab the whole image in one stealthy stare. He could go the distance by throwing an invective into an assemblage of viragos...or he could throw a light jab with a dunlop fist for a start, just to tell who amongst them really has the ghoul in her.
I am the man. I know what I want and what I need. I act first and apologize later, for the good of all, including u. Cos I know, like myriads of other ladies, u dont know what u are saying nor what u are doing.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Evegreen: 10:43pm On May 05, 2015
nairalife2013:
My wife turned bad two years after marriage. She was a perfect companion when we were dating.in the early times, I put her through rigorous tests like starving her of money, complaining a lot, keeping another girl and generally misbehaving once in a while. She was still religiously accomodating, forgiving, loving and highly respectful. I wasnt satisfied. I craved to see the worst in her, so I had to one day feign anger over a little kitchen error she committed. I had to gritt my teeth and do something venom-inspiring. Am a goodman no amount of punishment over and error am guilty of can turn me against my wife or any1 else, no matter the weight. If she is a wrong lady, she will display it today in her full glory. I wanted a wife I can trust. I dindt want to repeat the errors my parents made. That day I battered and pushed her out of my house into the rain and locked my door. The nite was just begining to inherit the earth. Time was 6.30pm
Re: How Do You Handle A Very Stubborn Wife? by Ihuomadinihu: 10:44pm On May 05, 2015
nairalife2013:
I took on the rough skin of a demon when I was single and in search of a True companion. Am a man now. Am home to peace presently. I killed my heart back way then, to keep it alive, like a seedling buried in the soil to die then grow. Chose yur path. I av chosen mind. I knew what I wanted. I always know what I want and how to painstakingly get to it. We all hav our ways, no matter how easy or hard we device them. Most men have the route to the shortcut in their brains and just walk down straight to it. Most dont. They discover thier own shortcut by long wandering, or die trying. Men are the last creatures that will ever grow up. To survive a tumultuous world of marriage and endless misunderstanding inherent in the day to day union with a stranger, he needs a partner that loves him like his own mother. Only calm feminine minds will ever understand this. Narrow and zigzag, Paths of the Outwardly Virtous maid with Rebel's innards, the cool dude sees it from afar and avoid it without a fuse...the collected man doesn't look when others are looking. He knows when to steal a glance and grab the whole image in one stealthy stare. He could go the distance by throwing an invective into an assemblage of viragos...or he could throw a light jab with a dunlop fist for a start, just to tell who amongst them really has the ghoul in her.
I am the man. I know what I want and what I need. I act first and apologize later, for the good of all, including u. Cos I know, like myriads of other ladies, u dont know what u are saying nor what u are doing.
^^Bloody trash.

4 Likes 1 Share

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