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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / The Hypocrisy (11346 Views)
Marriage Fallacy: The Hypocrisy In Monogamy / America's Hypocrisy-Gay & Incest(american Mom, Son In Love Charged With Incest) / The Hypocrisy Of Nigerian Men (2) (3) (4)
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Re: The Hypocrisy by onegig(m): 5:22pm On May 09, 2015 |
Bennyrazz.. You aren't making any logical points with your responses. Please quit it. @mulanbaba. Sorry about what happened. You just need time away. Time heals almost all hurts. I understand how painful it can be and how shattered your self esteem is but one thing you need to understand is that It's not you. It's him. Although you MAY have contributed a bit to this by being laid back and not seeing the signs early enough to have snapped him back to reality. But that's non of your fault though. It's not like she's better or more beautiful than you or something. He just lacked discipline and sometimes most married people need to get a grip as regards 3rd parties, free mixing with the opposite sexes and so on. Temptations are real and it's more sensible to flee from such rather than creating avenues for such to take hold. I guess your friend must have been very close and was allowed free reign around your home.Temptations are real and i don't understand how people believe humans are robots without urges. Just a hug to a "friendly" caress and things may have spiralled down into something else. If he is truly remorseful and you feel you can live with the thought of such betrayal of trust then you can try and make things work but the best for you now is to stay away and get yourself back. Don't rush any reconciliation. Best wishes. 3 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 5:22pm On May 09, 2015 |
5minsmadness: Do you know this couple? 6 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Ewuro4: 5:25pm On May 09, 2015 |
fem29: He knows everyone... I fear that guy 2 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by bennyrazz: 5:35pm On May 09, 2015 |
Wedon: only a foolish man desires expired product when there are quality, young succulent, fresh, sweet fishes in the river. And yes, the world revolves around us. We were here first. Remain a single mother and enjoy the benefits of a single mother. In fact, you will be the talk of town amongst your fellow women, you will be stereotyped. Being a married woman portrays you as been responsible, not some cheap slu.ts opening yansh for any available tom, dick & harry. It also comes with a lot of packaged benefits. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by 5minsmadness: 5:37pm On May 09, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:First off, show me anywhere on nairaland since I registered where I said I will be intolerant of a cheating spouse. Am making it easy for you by not adding "first offenders". Second, u didn't answer my question. Would u throw out a first offender? |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 5:40pm On May 09, 2015 |
ifyalways: Yes o. I wonder if it happens in Nigeria. Its common with couples who operate open marriages. I dnt want to think its the idea that made the husband think its o.k to sleep with her best friend. Nope. A very bad idea for marriage. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by freecocoa(f): 5:40pm On May 09, 2015 |
mulanbaba:Darling I definitely understand, just take things easy, don't be hard on yourself as this is not in any way your fault. No one needs an enemy with a friend like that, honestly, it would find it very hard to forgive such a thing. Just focus your energy on positive things and yourself for now, till you are ready for whatever decision you will take. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by 5minsmadness: 5:40pm On May 09, 2015 |
Wedon:Then u don't know many Nigerian men. And my post clearly says first offenders even though I PERSONALLY know two Nigerian men who had chronic cheating wives and still forgave them. I have written about them before. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 5:42pm On May 09, 2015 |
ifyalways: Ewuro4: Jesuuuu! Why would someone even consider that in a marriage |
Re: The Hypocrisy by bennyrazz: 5:46pm On May 09, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:I read her post and my initial reply was, she should deal with it instead of letting herself get hurt and you all misconstrued my points. She seeing a counsellor which is good because it has to do with two people she trusts, her friend, her husband. Men are not pained by women divorcing them, they are only pained by paying for child support, unnecessary bills etc. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 5:50pm On May 09, 2015 |
bennyrazz: You must really leave in la la land! Some men would rather not deal with the stigma of being divorced. So divorce pains them more than anything. 5 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 5:54pm On May 09, 2015 |
5minsmadness: Dude, i am so waiting for a thread where a man comes to complain about his cheating wife. I would love to read your comment on it. My answer to that question was actually in my first comment. you can read it. Cheating is one thing that would made me call it quits. Its my deal breaker. I aint afraid of divorce. I could forgive when its done once of which would be sooooooooo difficult for me because things will never remain the same again and i will no longer see my husband as my husband. might take years. But if its more than once, THE END. 2 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by mulanbaba: 5:55pm On May 09, 2015 |
ladies i suggested swinging because i wanted to see if his kinks goes that far but he definately was not interested at all. as for his friends he has always known that they find me attractive he just trusts me and he thought that they wont persue their feelings. now that he opened the way they are all stabbing him in the back SMH. Humans. saying i dont need him, they have more money, he will take better care of me etc. thats why i came here cos i hev no one to talk to. my friends are on hubbys side,his friends want me, my family deslike him so i wanted neatral opinions and somewhere to express my pain |
Re: The Hypocrisy by edwife(f): 5:56pm On May 09, 2015 |
ifyalways: My sentiments exactly! Why put ideas in his head? 1 Like |
Re: The Hypocrisy by 5minsmadness: 6:00pm On May 09, 2015 |
Wedon: Phema: You know, today has made me realise family section ladies are not as open-eyed as i thought when it comes to the subject ct of sex even efemena and chilli surprised me on the other rape thread |
Re: The Hypocrisy by edwife(f): 6:01pm On May 09, 2015 |
mulanbaba: Please Do not get yourself involved with any of his friends,they are all not worth it. What you need is to get yourself worth,esteem and care for your kids because you are filling the gap of both parents. 4 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by bennyrazz: 6:03pm On May 09, 2015 |
Wedon:hahahaha.. divorce pains a man? example pls? @onegig, to you I am not, to others I am. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by 5minsmadness: 6:03pm On May 09, 2015 |
^^^ Vultures swooping in for the kill. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 6:03pm On May 09, 2015 |
bennyrazz: And how you wanted her to deal with it was a very insensitive thing to say. Go and read your comment again. I say Wait until it happens to you o. Na you go rush come nairaland begin cry for us. Men that know how to cry blood and tear the whole world down when their wives cheat. Which child support? So its no longer about the kids abi? You really dnt knw what to say. 4 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by 5minsmadness: 6:04pm On May 09, 2015 |
Sophyrocks: So since i have never commited the crime then you need to apologise for calling me a liar, no? |
Re: The Hypocrisy by freecocoa(f): 6:07pm On May 09, 2015 |
Seriously? Na so these women don old reach? Una no know wetin be swinging. Please let's not say she put the idea in his head, that's totally not fair/true. People have fantasies and that's okay, plus what he did is in no way swinging, swinging is different from cheating, let's not join issues. 4 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 6:09pm On May 09, 2015 |
5minsmadness: No. I want to see things for myself. Seeing is believing. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 6:13pm On May 09, 2015 |
bennyrazz: Oooh Noooo. This dude has no idea what has been going on around him. Where do you stay? In a cave? So you dnt know married men cheat with married women? You dnt know there are men who chase anything in skirt, single or married? you dnt knw divorced women remarry? where are you from? Have you been asleep? 9 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 6:14pm On May 09, 2015 |
So the swinging was for him not even for you. Are you saying you are not comfortable with swinging yet you suggested it just to please him. I am not judging the swinging not that I am even in a position to judge, just don't get why you would suggest something you are not comfortable with. |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Ewuro4: 6:16pm On May 09, 2015 |
freecocoa: She actually did. You don't try that with any man. Keep your crazy fantasies in your brain till you grow the balls to handle it in real life. 1 Like |
Re: The Hypocrisy by bennyrazz: 6:19pm On May 09, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:committing suicide to deal with it is the best thing to do abi? meanwhile, stop personalizing all this, I live a very private life, all these your imaginations can never come to pass. Read and digest my post again & pray for understanding? was i in support of cheating in marriage? sh1t happens and when it does, you gat to deal with it. Life ain't one way, both ways. Husband was sorry, he was no serial offender it was his first. If we investigate very well, wife's friend might be the brain behind all these brouhaha. Some GFs gets jealous at their fellow GFs husband and they do everything to snatch him away. In short, I blame the Op for all this mess cuz she did not guard her husband jealously, if not, how did wife's GF get Hubby's no in the first instance? |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 6:23pm On May 09, 2015 |
bennyrazz: So when your wife cheats on you with your best friend, then you have failed as a man by pushing her to him and allowing him to snatch her away from you, s.hit happens, you deserved it and you must svck it up? O.k I get you. Reread your comment. You justified cheating by implyying that one must eat varieties of food. She has no chice but to forgiveand svck it up. Mr man, your wife will cheat on you one day. 11 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by cococandy(f): 6:27pm On May 09, 2015 |
I think forgiveness for a repentant person is in line but don't for a moment let anyone think your pain and your feelings don't matter. Anybody who comes near you to preach nonsense about how all men cheat and how it is your duty to endure it, deserves a very curt response from you that will make them go home and think about their foolishness. So pls if snapping at such folks help you release your anger, by all means do so Give yourself time. Forgive because you want to not because you're expected to. 3 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by bennyrazz: 6:28pm On May 09, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:seriously, I'm not in the mood to talk dirty. Single women never see man marry finish, na divorcee single man wan marry? a beg, go siddon for corner. Na hungry Married men dey cheat with married women 1 Like |
Re: The Hypocrisy by Nobody: 6:32pm On May 09, 2015 |
bennyrazz: Hahahahaha. Even in villages devoid of civilisation, you see women marrying numerous times and you are nt aware? eyah. You are not exposed. I have discerned the type of person i am conversing with. 7 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by bennyrazz: 6:35pm On May 09, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:politicians wey dem dey import fresh meat for from Uni, na dem wan get time for wrinkled bottom women with sleepers bosom, abegii that politician must be a counselor or a local champion 3 Likes |
Re: The Hypocrisy by cococandy(f): 6:36pm On May 09, 2015 |
5minsmadness:really? Gosh |
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