Holatunde007:
I received dis mail an hour ago frm an online frnd, she wanted dis to be posted on nairaland for serious and urgent advice.
The story goes thus:
I got married to this gentle, handsome man 4yrs ago, we hav a 2yrs old kid, he's currently working in one of this new generation bank as a branch manager.
At around 10.30pm last week friday, I told my hubby I will be going for a night vigil programme, which he declined going with me, I reasoned with myself abt d stress he must have passed thru during his travelings over the week, so I dressed up picked d car key then left for the programme, on getting to church, I discovered we were told to bring along pictures of our loved ones to pray on, I quickly turned my car and head back to the house which abt 35min drive, on getting inside, I smell smoke in the sitting room, at first I taught hubby was frying in d kitchen, but wen I moved closer I notice the smell comes directly from d rest room, I peeped tru d door holes cos it was locked frm behind, lo nd behold there I saw my husband smoking hemp heavily not even cigarette, i was so shocked, I stepped back without him noticing me, my eyes were full of tears and confusion, I picked what I needed and went out of the house. While driving back, I reasoned on my mind what on earth could have happened to him, I've never for once saw him in such a delicate situation before, I most say he's such a perfect, gentle looking man, who is loved and respected by families and friends, he's hard-working, and makes mainly the right decision most times.
I pulled over at the church compound went in and joined d prayer which has started 50min b4 I arrived.
Now what really confused me the more was is action wen I got back home, I met him in the kitchen preparing breakfast for me, he look so holy, normal, and well composed, his body spray smells all over the house, he seems never to have notice my presence at home last night. He move closer to me, gave me a kiss and told me not to worry preparing breakfast that morning, but still he notice the confusion on my face, then asked me if there is any problem doing the cooking for me, at first I wanted to attack him, confront him or scream at him for last night action, but his nice gesture towards me safes him out, then all I could ask him was that "Honey do u have any challenges or issues I don't know about or you feel you can't share with me?" He was shocked and looked at my face and said, dearie how on earth would I hide my challenges away from you, he later proceeded to hugging me tight, whispering into my ears "sweetheart there is nothing am going tru that I will ever hide from you" so I decided to hide my strange feelings and played along with him, gave him a kiss and went inside to the bedroom leaving my head unsettled.
Pls females and married couple in the house, what do you think I should do to him? How can I address this disturbing issue with my hubby, I love him so much but I can't deny the fact that I resent those that smoke a lot especially what I saw with him, india hemp for God sake.
Pls urgently need your candid advice, confused right now.
Thanks

missclasssy:
First of all, I would say your friend is married to a loving husband who cares about her so much and wouldn't want to hurt her in anyway. She should value that.

For me I believe this is a two way thing.
It's either the husband is going through tough situations that he needs to cool off the stress and frustration by smoking weed,
Or
He is an addict and has been hiding it all this while.

My advice is that the wife should bring up the topic at a time when the both of them are alone together and there isn't any tension, perhaps after sex, or when they are watching tv together, just when the husband is calmed down and in a happy state.
She should tell him exactly what happened and what she saw him do.
She should present the issue in a mature way and she shouldn't sound angry or annoyed with him.
From the brief description of the husband she gave I belief the husband will open up to her if she asks him.

The man is basically ashamed of this habit that's why he didn't say anything when she asked him that question.
If he tells her the truth,the wife should also let him know that she would always there to help him through whatever he is going through and if it's an addiction, she would help him put an end to it.

Op, I know you friend is born again christian and she would be put off by this singular act, but she should understand that their are always set backs in our lives as humans and as christians also.
The husband is going through a phase that he is not proud of and from everything, beyond his control and he needs someone to guide him through it. The wife should talk to and with her husband about whatever the matter is and be there for him.
In her own time she should also table the matter to God, through prayers.

All is well.

IamOdin:



B1tch u just bailed my fingers!!


Op,copy this as it is and post to your friend.


missy,i still doubt if you're female.

chimkaire:
Go online, get all the negative details of taking Indian Hemp, place the print-outs on his side of the bed




Thank me later

kay9:


Madam, this is not a game. The only thing following your advice will achieve is prove that his wife is smarter by "snooping" him out, and then put him on the defensive - and this man is supposed to be a manager or something, it's very likely he makes a lot more than the wife does, so I bet he won't react well to being shamed. So, if you really believe that outsmarting your spouse is the best way to handle marriage issues, then I'm very sorry you.

chimkaire:
Go online, get all the negative details of taking Indian Hemp, place the print-outs on his side of the bed




Thank me later

missclasssy:
First of all, I would say your friend is married to a loving husband who cares about her so much and wouldn't want to hurt her in anyway. She should value that.

For me I believe this is a two way thing.
It's either the husband is going through tough situations that he needs to cool off the stress and frustration by smoking weed,
Or
He is an addict and has been hiding it all this while.

My advice is that the wife should bring up the topic at a time when the both of them are alone together and there isn't any tension, perhaps after sex, or when they are watching tv together, just when the husband is calmed down and in a happy state.
She should tell him exactly what happened and what she saw him do.
She should present the issue in a mature way and she shouldn't sound angry or annoyed with him.
From the brief description of the husband she gave I belief the husband will open up to her if she asks him.

The man is basically ashamed of this habit that's why he didn't say anything when she asked him that question.
If he tells her the truth,the wife should also let him know that she would always there to help him through whatever he is going through and if it's an addiction, she would help him put an end to it.

Op, I know you friend is a born again christian and she would be put off by this singular act, but she should understand that their are always set backs in our lives as humans and as christians also.
The husband is going through a phase that he is not proud of and from everything, beyond his control and he needs someone to guide him through it. The wife should talk to and with her husband about whatever the matter is and be there for him.
In her own time she should also table the matter to God, through prayers.

All is well.

Holatunde007:
I received dis mail an hour ago frm an online frnd, she wanted dis to be posted on nairaland for serious and urgent advice.
The story goes thus:
I got married to this gentle, handsome man 4yrs ago, we hav a 2yrs old kid, he's currently working in one of this new generation bank as a branch manager.
At around 10.30pm last week friday, I told my hubby I will be going for a night vigil programme, which he declined going with me, I reasoned with myself abt d stress he must have passed thru during his travelings over the week, so I dressed up picked d car key then left for the programme, on getting to church, I discovered we were told to bring along pictures of our loved ones to pray on, I quickly turned my car and head back to the house which abt 35min drive, on getting inside, I smell smoke in the sitting room, at first I taught hubby was frying in d kitchen, but wen I moved closer I notice the smell comes directly from d rest room, I peeped tru d door holes cos it was locked frm behind, lo nd behold there I saw my husband smoking hemp heavily not even cigarette, i was so shocked, I stepped back without him noticing me, my eyes were full of tears and confusion, I picked what I needed and went out of the house. While driving back, I reasoned on my mind what on earth could have happened to him, I've never for once saw him in such a delicate situation before, I most say he's such a perfect, gentle looking man, who is loved and respected by families and friends, he's hard-working, and makes mainly the right decision most times.
I pulled over at the church compound went in and joined d prayer which has started 50min b4 I arrived.
Now what really confused me the more was is action wen I got back home, I met him in the kitchen preparing breakfast for me, he look so holy, normal, and well composed, his body spray smells all over the house, he seems never to have notice my presence at home last night. He move closer to me, gave me a kiss and told me not to worry preparing breakfast that morning, but still he notice the confusion on my face, then asked me if there is any problem doing the cooking for me, at first I wanted to attack him, confront him or scream at him for last night action, but his nice gesture towards me safes him out, then all I could ask him was that "Honey do u have any challenges or issues I don't know about or you feel you can't share with me?" He was shocked and looked at my face and said, dearie how on earth would I hide my challenges away from you, he later proceeded to hugging me tight, whispering into my ears "sweetheart there is nothing am going tru that I will ever hide from you" so I decided to hide my strange feelings and played along with him, gave him a kiss and went inside to the bedroom leaving my head unsettled.
Pls females and married couple in the house, what do you think I should do to him? How can I address this disturbing issue with my hubby, I love him so much but I can't deny the fact that I resent those that smoke a lot especially what I saw with him, india hemp for God sake.
Pls urgently need your candid advice, confused right now.
Thanks

chibic:
Women sef!

I thought she caught the man with another woman. What is the big deal about smoking? This a man that does not abuse you, he treats you very well(according to you), so what else do you want? You think their's a perfect human in this world? What if he is a cheat who doesn't smoke, will you prefer that? Or an abusive husband who doesn't smoke. Which one is better?

Its better that he smokes and still be a very good husband IMO.
He might have been addicted to it but doesn't want you to know. He just doesn't want you to get hurt because he loves you. You should be greatful to GOD.

If a man is faithful, his wife will find another fault. if he doesn't stay out late, caring and loving, the wife must find another fault. if he's very wealthy, there must be one fault detected. This is the reason why women are hardly happy in their marriages. They seek for something non-existent.