bamidele029:


Actually it's a weak man that gets violent when "pushed" . One should never get violent except if it's self Defence, a strong man controls himself . Women beaters are cowards, those same guys meet men everyday at work, on the street etc that annoy and push them yet I assure you they don't go around fighting because they know they will probably get their asses kicked.

If they are real men, when a solider / police pushes" them they should retaliate

A soldier!!!! . Hmmmmmmm

If engaging a soldier in a fight makes one a man, I think it's better to be a weak man. What do u think?

raumdeuter:
^^ Did you attack him in anyway before he started beating you

Or he just got up from a delicious meal and decided to exercise his fists on you

I wish I had the strength to have attacked him cause then it won't be beating but a fight and he would have been in a sorry state

bukatyne:


Interesting.

A difference of opinion always is.

5minsmadness:


A difference of opinion always is.

Excuse me?

mizcyn:
I used to say to myself if I was ever hit by my husband I will leave but here I am. I'm a wreck, its not like I don't have the means to leave but here I am. All I hear is I'm sorry it won't happen again, forget it.im lost, drained of all emotions fighting with what I have always known that men don't just hit once, it's something of control and they keep exerting it. Why don't they fight their friends or fellow men, being a woman is the worst thing to happen to anyone . The society blames you and justifies the man, your friends gossip and laugh at you, your priest says marriage is a covenant, where do you go, who do you turn to

april2015:
I don't understand this world a man hits a woman he is justified because she angered him, when he angers her y doesn't she just put poison in his food or kill him in his sleep, or she is not entitled to being angry, is it because a man has more physical strength or is it what our mothers have taught us that we should beat women when angry, what a life, what a world. , a man does as he likes and walks away. y were women created, I don't understand this world at all .

Wetin be all this one na?
Pls pls you ladies need to stop this.

There should be no excuse to beat your spouse. Verbal argument should not be a reason. Argue it out or leave till tension cool off. Beating your spouse has a lasting effects on your own children. It tells them you are mean, bad and wicked. You want your child to grow in a loving environment not an environment where they see mom crying and sad from dad's big hand.
No matter how much I love you, you dare your hands on me, I will be calling the cops and we go from there. I will make you aware during courtship.
Stoning you with phone break that cycle.
Working on making marriage work is two ways. Hitting her doesn't solve the problem.

mcdokwe:
The question is did you take after your mother, giving him reasons to want to hit you?

It is easier to say you don't want the type of marriage your parents had but still gravitate towards such or an even more disastrous one when you don't do the things you ought to to ensure you have the sort of marriage you desire.

You have a choice to make, work on your marriage or walk out.

In all, I wish you the best.

armyofone:
There should be no excuse to beat your spouse. Verbal argument should not be a reason. Argue it out or leave till tension cool off. Beating your spouse has a lasting effects on your own children. It tells them you are mean, bad and wicked. You want your child to grow in a loving environment not an environment where they see mom crying and sad from dad's big hand.
No matter how much I love you, you dare your hands on me, I will be calling the cops and we go from there. I will make you aware during courtship.
Stoning you with phone break that cycle.
Working on making marriage work is two ways. Hitting her doesn't solve the problem.

ok, maybe people should go ahead deliberately creating unnecessary tension in their homes. Ok I hear.

U married the wrong man.. Cut your lose now and move on with your life. There is nothing wrong with being a female, There are plenty other people out there that married husbands who will never lift a finger against them no matter how angry he gets.

Was he like this when you were courting? If you are used to the beating then, why not now?

Hoping an abusive person will change is like hopin a leopard will change its spot.
We all get angry, i am sure you do too. Do you beat up your husband when you are mad at him?

I dont know how much of this beating you can take but just try hard not to end up like that woman i read about in the punch newspaper, the banker that got stabbed by her husband 88 times.
It must have started with a slap every now and then, it graduated into beating then knife till she was murdered. She never thought it will happen to her but it did.

She was educated, employed and could have moved on with her life. I guess she must have been thinking: he will change.. Or what will people say that i am divorced.
All i am saying is Animals dont change. They will beg, promise and cajole u to stay.

I wish you can talk to a wide variety of women that have had the misfortune of marrying an abusive husband.

The more children you have, the harder it gets for you to breakfree. Your hubby might be counting on that. I really wish you goodluck.. Just please dont bring up a child in that kind of environment. Dont create another human with the orientation that hitting a woman is cool or marrying a violent man is okay.

+Off Topic+
**Religion and substandard education is a real problem in Nigeria. Even the females who are empowered and employed enough to be independent cannot breakfree cuz of stigmatization of being a divorcee.
Naija guys get advantage alot. The females will do anything to stay married.

So sorry for what you are going through @april2015. But I am thinking, how will you manage through 9 months of pregnancy with beatings? Please think about your baby's life too.

Pity party