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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? (34811 Views)
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Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 8:10am On Jul 06, 2015 |
manie:all u typed or copied from Google are just a waste. U failed to understand that simple English word, WEALTH. Upper middle-class and wealth. Analyse! |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by TV01(m): 9:26am On Jul 06, 2015 |
Ewuro4:It was lovely here. Real relaxing with lots of zeds and some hard gym sessions - my favourite type . Hope yours was good. Please go easy on Jesús and his mates this morning, I know you mad at 'em I see your point -and it's actually closer to my own experience - but considering it objectively. I still believe tieing the knot earlier just gives a couple more scope. I think many societies are losing the strong "marriage cultures" that helped them flourish. We call it "early" as people tend to mature and take responsibility later these days, it wasn't like that in the past. People are also more self-seeking and the sacrifice of marriage and children isn't embraced like it was. TV |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by TV01(m): 9:37am On Jul 06, 2015 |
manie: Which is why I said "ATBE". I agree that financial stability is ideal, but circumstances can change and challenges come whatever the age of the couple or length of the union. Then it's the maturity & commitment of the couple that comes to the fore. Considering things objectively - and ATBE - I consider younger marriage to have more advantages and confer the couple with more leeway. I haven't yet heard anything to make me think differently. TV |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by adconline(m): 3:55pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
jascon1:Not everyone is as daft as you are. Google is a platform for cross-referencing or double-checking our views/ideas. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 4:23pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
adconline:tell that to the marine. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 4:26pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
adconline:with my eyes closed I can operate ur brain and beat the world record. U r simply no match for me |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by adconline(m): 4:49pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
jascon1:Willful ignorance or delusions of grandeur! U got exposed by telling lies about Bills Gates' upbringing and you are still trying so hard to justify it. Let me tell u how things work- a kid born of wealthy parents like Bill Gates would've a head start in life; like going to a private school, access to private tutor, scoring very high in SAT, getting accepted into IVY unis and getting a job at Wall Street, top law and consulting firms.. So only willfully ignorant folks would admit that family background doesn't matter. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by manie(m): 4:59pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
jascon1: An upper middle class that can comfortable afford to send his child to Harvard can be described s wealthy. Bill Gates parents were wealthy enough to send their children to private elementary and high schools. It takes a family with pedigree and real wealth to give his child, the type of good head start Bill received from his parents. Members of the upper middle class and above represents just 5% of the American family. Even Bill Gate had to consolidate on his foundation, maybe that was why he got married at 39. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 5:08pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
adconline:kid u just won't learn. Am trying so hard to bring this down to Ur level, but u seem so summed up in a low class degree. Fight or kill u just can't accentuate. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by manie(m): 5:14pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
jascon1: What do you call wealth passed on to your children? You cannot die living a lasting legacy and wealth for your children, provided you plan your life, you are disciplined and you inculcate the right values and attitudes in our progeny. Getting married at a very young age and no tangible asset of yours is no competition either. Nothing is sure, but with planning and taking responsibilities for your actions and who you want to be, you can tilt the odd to your favour. Remember our destinies are not written for us, but by us. Barack Obama The laws states 18 years, you can advice your 18 year old brother who is still in the University to get married and start procreating immediately. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 7:30pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
manie:my brother was married at 19 and today he and his family r well-going. Many teenagers live with their girlfriends in school and it doesn't stop them from graduating. Tbh most comments here are solely on financial establishments, and that's why I say blame it on the government. I was hoping to c issues like maturity and sense of responsibility etc Cos, I c no reason why a 18 yr old lad won't get a job to sustain his family. I c no reason why a 23 yr old man can't pay school fees and that's if we have a functioning system. No enforced labor laws. Even the minimum wage (18k/mth) isn't feasible . If u say destiny(which I don't believe in) is written by us, why then do u have to leave wealth behind for kids and deprive Dem of their freedom to rewrite their own destiny? At my age, Am more interested about life. Let them marry. Instead of living a promiscuous bachelorhood, simply marry n be responsible. In some tribes (nomads) in Nigerian the males are giving their brides so early and they live happily ever after. The fact is your goals in life which differs from everyone else's. Having a good job and plenty money isn't fulfillment or a dream to some ppl. The fact that YOU FEEL ppl sud be married after financial success isn't genial. Let's Nigerian youths enjoy their lives with their women. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by adconline(m): 7:36pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
jascon1:U don't need an expert to show u that Naija is a classical example of all that's wrong without planning b4 having kids... Most peeps fail in school, business, work etc.. Next thing on their mind, let me get married and see if I could turn my fortune around. While others are passing on wealth-folks like u are passing on hope. As my teacher would say " the rich are getting richer while the poor are having more babies" strength is not in numbers but in strategic planning' |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by manie(m): 7:42pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
adconline: A lot of Nigerians live in Hopeville, believing so much in miracles. No wonder Men of God who sell hope are making a lot of money from their parishioners, I am a Christian, but I believe heaven helps those who help and plan for themselves. 1 Like |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by manie(m): 7:51pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
jascon1: Where is the maturity for a married who is still living in the family house, because he cannot afford a house rent nor build his house. Where is the sense of responsibility when you cannot afford the basic things for your children? Rather, lazy folks will pray for their children to be successful so as to elevate their parents out of poverty. Every responsible parent will have a deliberate plan on how their children will out grow them, rather than recycling poverty from generation to generation. Study how the Jews, Indians and Lebanese who came to Lagos less than 100 years ago, grew from poverty and blue collars jobs to millionaires and billionaires in dollars and they have succeeded growing their wealth from generation to generation. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by Joromi1: 8:31pm On Jul 06, 2015 |
A 19-year-old is not yet mentally capable to handle a family of his own. If your cousin does it and succeeds, then he's just one out of a thousand. The probability for success is almost impossible. It's a silly, uncalculated risk that tends to flop |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 3:21am On Jul 07, 2015 |
manie:brother Manie, I totally agree with u. Tho, in allusion I just wanna say, all is vanity. Money is good, but we all need spiritual wealth. The Bible says eventuality befalls all man. The quality of ones life isn't judged by material possessions. The fact that one isn't successful is not enough to call him lazy. The rich aren't the hardest working ppl. Bro, u are not the smartest. The fact u succeeded doesn't mean u r smarter than that man in the street. Life is so unfair to many. il urge u to go on ur knees and thank God that ur plans worked out for u. Bro, don't judge yet! Just give thanks. It is never by your power or ur plans or wisdom, it is by his special grace. God is God and his blessings are the only that last for generations. Jesus said he got not even a pillow to his name. His apostles never cared about worldly possessions. Solomon had everything, but he called everything, vanity. I respect ur opinions and will never deny that u made some well reasonable points, but in conclusion we live in a world where choices are respected and options are only suggested and not enforced especially in a case like this. Our parents might not be educated, but their wishes for us and their advices are Immeasurable |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by Opiosko: 3:25am On Jul 07, 2015 |
I think it has to do with when one is matured enough to have a sense of responsibilty and having met the the right person. I married last yr 3weeks to my 25th birthday and a month after my NYSC and I'm really supper happy today. My mates who are not married are not doing better (some are even confused and frustrated about life).... Modesty will not allow me te reel out what i have so let me just say that I'm doing well and loving the man I'v grown into. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by manie(m): 5:52am On Jul 07, 2015 |
jascon1: I agree with you that life is unfair to most people, I guess it is not fair to 80% of the population. But life can be fair, when we start having the right attitude, information, knowledge and expectations about life. The right expectation about life, is that life is not fair and will not be fair, but the odds can change through planning and prayers. But most of us only pray, hope and focus on the God factor, rather than combining these with strategic planning. Nothings stops a person from enjoying the blessings here and also the one in the great beyond, or are they mutually exclusive. It is a nice experience sharing my thoughts with you and also learning from you. Have a great day. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by TV01(m): 9:23am On Jul 07, 2015 |
Joromi1:Au contraire - this is dependent largely on the family/culture in which one is raised. Even now in many - what may well be considered more primitive - societies, manhood rites are performed between the ages of 12 & 15. And marriage traditionally happened much earlier than currently obtains. The extended adolescence practised in many societies these days - which in my opinion has no real benefit - is what makes one consider a 19 year old incapable. Not that I'm pushing for that - just saying that with the right cultural ethos or nurture, it ain't a thing. Hence terms like kidults etc. With no real demand for any kind of grown up responsibility, or a sense of obligation - to others or the wider community. It's all about autonomy, feelings and selfish desire. And it doesn't prepare them for marriage, or more pertinently successful marriages - it's why there is such dissaray around the institution right now. Opiosko:Thank you for your testimony sir, may it abound - even unto your generations. And religion/faith has been touched on. I wonder if it would not be way more practical in terms of avoiding "defiling" the marriage bed if marriage was expected early. How easy will it be to keep oneself into their 30's - or are we talking "cultural Christinity" here? TV |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by bukatyne(f): 10:49am On Jul 07, 2015 |
bisdansun: Very good one I also do not understand when people say they want to build their 'career' before getting married... I love early marriage but with any equally young man... 22+ lady and a 26yr old man or even 24 or 23 sef... A relative of mine married at 22 with his wife 21yrs old. I love seeing couple in their early fifties done with kids (probably also married or out of the house) flexing... They still have the strength and desire to do so God help us 1 Like |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by jascon1(m): 11:31am On Jul 07, 2015 |
manie:thanks, my brother. Was a nice argument. And thanks for sharing inspiring thoughts and also your life experiences with us. Honestly, I wish for more conversations n banters like I had with u. U r truly mature n capable of holding your ground. 1 Like |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by dadson2009(m): 1:52am On Jan 10, 2016 |
gamaliel121:I agree with you, I finished school at 27,nysc @28, still hoping for a better job, and I hope to marry early |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by dadson2009(m): 1:53am On Jan 10, 2016 |
gamaliel121:i agree with you, I finished school at 27,nysc @28, still hoping for a better job, and I hope to marry early |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by ireneidiva(f): 8:30pm On Jan 10, 2016 |
dadson2009:Early again? You have already missed 'early'. Sorry. Move on |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by dadson2009(m): 10:53pm On Jan 11, 2016 |
ireneidiva:lols, so you mean I have missed early? At 28 going to 29? |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by ireneidiva(f): 11:08pm On Jan 11, 2016 |
dadson2009:Early is less than 25 duh. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by Joromi1: 6:27pm On Jan 14, 2016 |
ireneidiva:That's wicked! I know a lot of guys past 40 years who are still bachelors |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by ireneidiva(f): 7:33pm On Jan 14, 2016 |
Joromi1:Ok. Tell yourself whatever helps you sleep well @ night. |
Re: Is Early Marriage Really Advantageous? by Joromi1: 9:53am On Jan 16, 2016 |
ireneidiva:Madam, no be fight |
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