Should I Just Move On? - Romance - Nairaland
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Does He Really Love Me With This Attitude Or Should I Just Move On / Should I Just Move On? / Should I Just Move On (2) (3) (4)
| Should I Just Move On? by neve: 3:36pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
ok, i never thought i would do this, but i just need a honest advice, My boyfriend and I have been having a lot of problems for the past few weeks, we have been dating for seven months, he's been communicating with his ex since last year November and only told me in feb, He says he finds himself thinking of me more than he thinks of her, and he doesn't want to loose me, I know he cares about me because he shows it, but its so difficult because it hurts so much, He said he wants to get married this year and is considering his ex, because am still young(20) and not ready, he last saw this girl six years ago, they never broke up, she was kinda of his first love, the girl's family just took her away to US because they didn't want her to be around him, they from different tribes, now she's 26 and she's planning to come see him and they would hang out, like he's gonna tour her round the city, Now i know the best thing for me would be to move on, but i love this guy and its so difficult, and i wanna let go, but he's making it difficult, and doesn't wanna let go, I can't see myself being second best we live in the same city (Singapore) and this girl lives in the US, He keeps saying he doesn't wanna just throw away what we have together, and i should give him time to fix it, like after she leaves, Am thinking, whether he wants to see if it still works out between them, and if doesn't then he can have where to lean back on, but what if it works out, where does that leave me  Am confused right now, what do you think i should do, Pls no insults just honest opinions and advice. thanks, |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Dvampire(m): 4:14pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
how do u deal with a leaking tap? do u wait till it leaks and floods the entire house with water of u fix it the moment u detect it? dearie, the guy is cheating on u and cheating on the girl as well. he is 2-timing, plain & simple. sometimes, its best when u love with ur brain & not with ur heart. in this case use ur head. its obvious he loves his other girl and has told u so. i suggest u move on and leave him to sort himself out. u might just save urself a nasty heart trouble |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by simplysmat(m): 4:56pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
You should move on. Th fact that he has actually told you he wants get married is enough reason. If he's going to marry you, he won't be telling you that, he'll ask you to marry him. Besides that, I think that at 20 you're not under pressure and regardless of how badly you love a person, if he's thinking long without you, then you're wasting time. Just leave him before he leaves you. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by akaa(f): 5:12pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
my baby i want you to move on with your life, you are too young to be use as a spare tyre, infant the man does not deserve you ok. you have a great future so move on with your life. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by omega25red(m): 5:18pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
move on He is just keeping you around as a continjency plan. If he sees his ex and she looks good then he'll break up with you if she looks like she has had 10 kids he would blow her off then come back to you. Yes you love him and it's hard but do your self a favor and move on |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Czarskit(m): 5:32pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
U are funny oh! He told you that he wants to get married (NOT TO YOU) this year & u're stil talking 'bout love?! *Tssew* The guy culdn't even lie to kip u on 'pending' & . . . I'm speechless (I actually feel like insulting u sha). . . |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Nobody: 5:36pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
look my dear that's men 4 u, pls. do not be in a confused state. refuse to be his second best, need to dust yourself and move on. and who knows your worth might just b around d corner cheers. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by sistawoman: 10:14pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
Move on sweetie You are just the back up plan. He wants to be sure that he is not left w/o a wife. NEVER, EVER let a man make you second best. Only give your heart to the one that gives thier whole heart to you. You're so young, you have lifetime ahead of you. Just sit still and wait, your man is coming girl and it aint him. When you really love someone you can never cheat on them or keep them waiting in the wings. Trust me. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Finally: 10:22pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
Whats wrong with gals of nowadays ?  The other day some broad was whining about how she found out that her boyfriend was married but was still considering sticking with him. The broad was just 22 and the man in question 32. What a waste of feminity Ol, girl, U are only 20, MOVE THE Bleep ON!!!!! |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by CrazyMan(m): 10:49pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
My dear, you just have to move on. I know it might be difficult for you to do that, but believe me, its the best option you've got. It makes no sense for one to water a dead plant. . .a sensible person would plant a new one instead. So my advice to you is that you look for someone else who would love you and you alone. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Finally: 5:33am On Mar 19, 2009 |
crazykid: Moving on is NOT the best option she has, it is the ONLY option she has |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by sparta(f): 10:48am On Mar 20, 2009 |
Girl, he's taking advantage of you. he is a tortoise and he is using you. He prefers his ex but he dosent know if things will turn out well so he is keeping you around. if it turns out well for them you are a goner, if not he will come back. You are second best, a last resort to him, Run for your dear heart. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Ben13: 10:51am On Mar 20, 2009 |
move on, but not with speed. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by tnk24: 5:13am On Mar 21, 2009 |
Dear, what next, everybody in this thread is saying the same thing. I think it is very obvious. If you don't want to pick the pieces of your heart MOVE ON!!! |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by oluwafemi113(m): 5:44am On Mar 21, 2009 |
Should I Just Move On? yes but with open brain |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Archilles(m): 8:49am On Mar 21, 2009 |
@Poster, One statement, move on. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by dai513(f): 3:06pm On Mar 22, 2009 |
RUN!!!!RUN AS FAST AS YOUR LEGS WILL CARRY YOU. Honey, if a man says I am contemplating someone else, he is contemplating someone else. Don't even try to sift through the comment with a fine tooth comb, it is what it is at this point. You will survive, we pay too much attention to how difficult a process will be instead of its worth at the end. You are young and you will find a wonderful guy soon (or he will find you). Don't let any body use you as their reserve because if it doesn't work out with his ex and he marries you, there will be some other person down the line that he will cheat on you with because he knows you will always stick around. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by yme1(f): 3:27pm On Mar 22, 2009 |
@poster MOVE ON |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by MrCrackles(m): 3:32pm On Mar 22, 2009 |
Topic/Poster Dont move on ok, get a sofa and lie down there like a log of wood! I dont know why some people can use thier common senses!!!! |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by neve: 4:02pm On Mar 22, 2009 |
I took everyone's advice. . . to walk away. . , and moved on. . . .and i must say i feel so much better. . . .I'm even wondering what ever i saw in him. . . .he ain't worth the stress. Thanks for all your advice. I appreciate it.  |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by IykeD(m): 4:51pm On Mar 22, 2009 |
was that for me?? lol. good to know u feel better now |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by topup: 3:43am On Mar 23, 2009 |
This is one of those situations that we'll try to make black and white when it truly is every colour of the rainbow. I normally would say 'move on' for the fact that he is obviously using you as his back up plan. But after reading a few influential articles (written by men), I realised that men can make a lot of stupid mistakes, they are human, we are all human. Sometimes you don't see what's best for you, even when it's right in front of you. He might just be curious, and when he agrees to meet her (and you left) - he may decide to miss the meeting and come and seek you (but it'll be too late). He might be curious and just making sure he feels nothing for her before he plans to commit wholly to you. Okay, my mind is changing whilst I'm discussing this, and I have come to the conclusion that you should move on. Reasons being; - If he comes back to you, you will always be second choice or there was hesitation which does nothing for your trust and confidence in him in future if you two are to get married; - What's to stop him doing this when you two are married, he could consider a divorce or a second wife, but maybe changes his mind, but the problem still lies with the fact that he considered it; - He's warned you that he's considering his ex for marriage, which is a HUGE alarm, that he does not value his current relationship, it seems to me that he is more emotionally attached to his ex, if he cheats on you - he'll always have the excuse of "She must have known, it's obvious I wasn't going to stay. I mean who tells their current girlfriend that they are meeting an ex and considering her for marriage, and she stays with the guy." e.t.c. . Lastly, where is the self-worth. I commend you on being very level headed, but where is the input from your mind that reminds you that you wouldn't do this to him (list reasons)?? Why do you sell yourself short, is a relationship not 50:50?? Does he make all the decisions now?? Please, do what's best for you. If he values you, he'll come after you with full force and won't have such extreme doubts in his head. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by neve: 4:26am On Mar 23, 2009 |
Thanks Topup. . .But even if he comes back i don't consider taking him back. Because i always wanted to move on. . but never got the courage to do so. . . but now I've got the courage. . . am glad i did. . .because i was never happy with him. . .he's done a lot of things to hurt me . . .and i kept tolerating him because i was in love, Now that i can see more clearly. . .i realize he wasn't worth all the love i gave 2 him. . .I know it won't work out between both of them. . .because he's here and she's in US. .that's like a totally different continent. . . and he's not the distant kinda of person. . .so he's definitely going to cheat on her. I also know he would be back by the time she leaves. . .but then it would be too late. I've already decided to move on. . .let go of past hurts and just have fun with friends and family. . .at least those who i know care about me so much. . .and they really making it easy for me. . .because ever since i broke up with him. . .i haven't missed him and i find myself growing stronger each passing day. . .I kinda of hold no grudges against him. . .because i know everything happens for a reason and he was never the one for me. . .He only walked out to give a better guy a chance. . .so am all cool. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by oluwafemi113(m): 4:43am On Mar 23, 2009 |
move onnnnnnnnnnn |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by topup: 4:46am On Mar 24, 2009 |
neve: It's great to hear you say that. Hopefully you're not just saying what we want to hear. Truly, you must believe that you are not worth so little, but instead much more. There will be better guys out there and you will NOT end up lonely if it is your heart's desire to find someone to love who loves you too. That guy needs to learn his lesson, with every woman who lets him get away with this, his behaviour will worsen, just stand your ground, dust your shoulders, he needs to learn the hard way what he has missed. If he doesn't contact you in a day, week, month or year, know that it doesn't mean that you were not worth it, nor does it mean he's happier without you. It can mean a million things, just know that you being without him, has made you available, you can now attain your best. |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by Nobody: 6:19am On Mar 24, 2009 |
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.Let go of the guy completely,cos u dont want to settle for a substitute.U said u have left him,good.But what u need to work on is how to forget him completely,cos love makes any human vulnerable,by so i mean that if u ever have loved a person,even though u break up with him/her,at times u find urself thinkin about the person,mostly in ur quiet moments.And if u come up here to tell us that u have forgotten him so soon,that will be the greatest of all lies |
| Re: Should I Just Move On? by C2H5OH(f): 6:40am On Mar 24, 2009 |
roflmao  tiniyata: |
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